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We're in the same boat as you--99.9% sure we're one and done, but if we did have a second, it would be in at least 4 years, more likely 5+. But our LO is only 7 months so we have a while to go before we even consider TTC (and we're still pretty confident she's our only. We shall see though!)

EDIT: Ha, the first time I posted this I wrote "9 and done". Totally changes the meaning

My sister did and she loved it! Her 1st two were 3 yrs apart but then the 2nd two were 5-6 years apart -

right now her kids are 20, 17, 11, 6

We can't afford 2 in day care at the same time. So we have to wait till she is 4.5 and in free Pre-K or not have another. We aren't sure what we are going to do.

I'm not in this boat, but my SIL has two that are almost 7 years apart. I think she LOVES it! The older one is so protective and supportive of the younger one and really helps out a LOT! I think it's turned out to be a great age gap for them.

We waited We knew we always wanted 2, but after my daughter turned one (and then 2) I just couldn't imagine adding another baby to the mix - it didn't feel "right" at the time. This past spring my husband and I decided we were "ready" and our second will be here in April. That will put our kids 4.5 years apart, and we are thrilled!

Mine are almost 7 years apart and I really love it.

@ktdid23: We felt the same way with LO. Once he reached one, then two, we finally felt ready to add another one to the mix. We're trying for our second right now. 1-2 was a lot of fun and our marriage returned to a version of normal, so adding someone else just didn't feel right at the time. Now, we're both ready for the newborn rodeo again.

@ktdid23: My brother and I are 18 months apart. My mom had some fertility issues, so it doesn't bother me. My brother and SIL have a three year age gap between their twins and daughter. It seems that they felt the same way too. I'm glad that we've been able to embrace LO's toddlerhood to the fullest and work out some of the discipline stuff with just him before adding another one. Three years feels like a good gap for us. I did want it sooner at first, but am now happy with the future gap. I'm hoping that we'll have a summer or fall baby #2.

@SugarplumsMom: we are actually thinking 4 year difference as well! I would prefer 3, but we just worked out our plans and if we have them 3 years apart- I have to solo parent for the second child's first year (dh would work 6-5 and then have dental school at night). If we have them 4 years apart, I wouldn't have to solo all morning day and night but our first would start school (4K) when the second is 3 months (if all went to plan, that is). I think 4 years isn't too far apart...

@loveisstrange: I like a lot of your points; 4 years means first is in school and more independent, second gets all day attention.

If we had a second (huge if), our age gap would be 4+ years. As it stands, LO is going to private school so unless we move to a better school district, there's no way we can swing 2 kids, one in daycare and one in private school (and later 2 in private school).

Our original plan was 4.5-5 years apart, all due to finances surround daycare (like @Smurfette: said). Our very good friends have two sons 4 years apart and I love their dynamic. They are 7 and 11 right now and it's still working for them. But, I worry about this plan because 5 years sounds so long to start over again and our son is a late Sept. birthday and I didn't want baby #2 to factor into when he began Kindergarten.
Now I'm teaching at the preschool/daycare our son attends so, if we can get the right discount, I would love to have a second baby sooner, with a gap of 3-4 years. I'm talking with my boss about numbers right now and it's possible we'll start trying spring of 2015. (Although when I type that out it seems *too soon*!)

We are 99% 1 and done, but last night actually had a really long conversation about maybe (very, very maybe) having another; and my husband said today that all day he's been thinking about that conversation.

If (huge IF) we have another, there would be at least 3-4 years difference between the 2. I'll be 33 in a few weeks and my husband will be 49 this year, so we don't have forever to decide.

I still can't imagine / have no desire to add another kid to the mix; but who knows how we'll feel in another year or so!

Most of the siblings I know who are close in age fight like cats and dogs; so I don't see that being a reason to have kids close in age.

Thanks for posting this, I loved reading the responses!
We have a 4.5 DS and a just turned 2 DD and if we go for a third, which is a big if, it'll have to be a few more years as I'm currently having cancer treatments. DD has been such a hard baby/toddler I'm definitely keen on a big gap if we go again!!!
I personally am 5 years older than my sister and we are incredibly close.

I know quite a few people for whom this worked out great. My mom and uncle are about 10 years apart, and they're very close even though they now live in different countries. Two of my uncles have kids that are 7 to 10 years apart, and they're very close and the oldest sibs have always been very protective of the youngest.

@californiadreams: Honestly, I think thats the biggest thing for me. Ive read studies that say that a larger age gap (I think it's 2+ years) is a lot more beneficial to both children purely because of the time and attention you are able to devote to the younger child. It makes it a more equal playing field for both kids in terms of starting out.

damn it, we are 99.9999% one and done but this thread has me thinking of the possibilities....

i used to always think i wanted kids really close together. i am pregnant with my first now and can't imagine going through this with a toddler at home. a 4 year age gap is seeming really appealing to me these days, especially because i think i need a lottt of time to get over this first trimester haha. i love the idea of enjoying the oldest and waiting until they're going to be in school full time to have a second. my brother was two years older and we weren't/aren't close AT ALL so that doesn't play into it for me in the slightest. i think closeness is more determined by personality so there's no way to predict how it'll all play out.

We're still debating if we'll have another, but if we do, they'll likely be 4+ years apart. I just can't imagine adding anyone to our family at this point, and I think I'd prefer my son to be a little more self-sufficient than he is at 2.5. Also, If we have another, I've already said that I won't be going back to work, and we can't comfortably swing that quite yet. I'll be 32 next year, and I don't want to wait too much longer than that, so we'll see what happens.