I've been MIA for awhile now. I'm no longer as excited about looking for signs each month.

Don't get me wrong, I still desperately want baby #2, but seeing people who just started trying get their BFP is taking a toll on me.

We've been trying for a year and a half, and more months than not my husbands travel schedule matches up with when I'm supposedly fertile.

Two weeks ago we got to "dance" a lot, and it was awesome, but I've gotten to the point where instead of checking to see if I'll be peeing on a stick when he gets home, I'm just calculating to see if I"ll be on my period or not.

I'm a bit of a pessimist.

Then on Saturday (about a week after I should have O'd) a felt a distinct sharp pinch in my lower abdomen, I'd never really felt that before.

Then early Monday I started to spot, and it was different. Usually it's more red, but this was definitely pink.
There was nothing more until Late Tuesday, when it turned to the red I usually have experienced a few days before my period, only this is a few days earlier than I usually spot.

But it didn't stop, and my period hasn't come in full force yet.

I"m on day 5 of light spotting. I can't even call it a light period yet, I don't think.

So I don't know if this is just a weird cycle, if when I test this weekend it will be positive, or if the change in my spotting from pink to red was a missed early miscarriage.

Thanks for letting me vent. I don't really have anyone I can talk to about this.