I'm so anxious and frustrated and disappointed with my mom. She's apparently sobbing to my sister about how selfish and awful me and my siblings all are. At least part of it is that she just asked me this morning if she could stay with us for my daughter's birthday now that it's right around the corner even though I started asking her months ago- in the meantime my bil and sil decided to come and it would be a full house. I told her we could still make it work but she wasn't interested.

She's poor, lonely and works long hours, my dad died a few years ago and I know he helped keep our family together better and helped keep her saner. We live far away and see her infrequently. She's a totally narcissistic, everything is about her or a preplanned attack on her- my bil is surely coming to show what a lovely family member he is to make my mom's kids look bad and certainly to take her spot.

I 100% admit I haven't been great about calling or doing facetime recently but 1- neither has she and 2-last time I talked to her she "jokingly" accused me of being pregnant but keeping it a secret from her while I was waiting to miscarry. I know she didn't know but it still really hurt. We essentially have zero to talk about except my daughter and how miserable her life is and every time I hang up I feel miserable and low for the rest of the day, it just eats at me. I honestly don't even have a big desire to have a relationship with her and only make the feeblest attempts out of guilt. I do most definitely want her to have a relationship with my daughter though and I'm better about trying to bridge that gap if that makes sense.

Help! How do I get over this and not let it consume me and make me grumpy for the rest of the day?