Hellobee Boards

If your center is handling it according to their policies, I would just wait it out. It is unfortunate, but it will pass. As long as you are confident that the center is doing everything they can, I would just try to be patient.

If you don't feel like they are doing all they can, I would ask the director to sit down and talk about how you can problem solve together to come up with a solution.

My child got bit too for a few weeks and then the phase passed. It made me upset because I wanted to protect him but realistically, they will all do it at some point especially since they learn it from each other. They always reported it to me and had me sign off on the incident reports and I know they correct/redirect and have the children apologize to the other and explain why it isn't nice.

Low and behold, soon after my kid threw a toy and split his buddy's lip open. I'm friends with his mom and I saw her and apologized for him and she (has 3 kids) was like "oh god, don't even worry. My kid hit another with a xylophone last week. It happens".

I definitely think it's a part of normal development of social skills, hurting someone, seeing them hurt and feeling bad for it, comforting/apologizing after etc...

As long as teachers are supervising properly and trying to prevent, I would try not to worry. I always try and make it a discussion at home, when he's hurt someone or been hurt so he can talk about how it feels and why it's wrong.

@gilmoregirl: I would ask to sit down and discuss a formal plan for how they handle these situations...what is the teachers role in prevention, what is the consequence for this behavior, and so on. They should have some sort of official way of handling things.

It is totally normal and developmentally appropriate. It stinks because it leaves such a clear mark, where some aggression is less obvious (pushing, for example). Prevention is really the best way to handle it, especially with kiddos this young.

I wrote this post a while back. I was a toddler teacher and dealt with this a LOT. I hope you get some answers soon from the center!

http://www.hellobee.com/2013/10/29/dealing-with-toddlers-who-bite/

I would speak with the director and ask about a shadow for the biter. My daughter was repeatedly bitten by a classmate, and after the fourth attack (which involved scratches and bites - clear negligence on the teacher's part, because they didn't see it or intervene despite evidence of a lengthy attack) she has received scars on her face that still haven't completely healed. This happened at the end of October, so she has been scarred for over 7 months. We switched her classroom and things have been much better.

If the kid is a known biter, the teachers should be keeping an extra eye out. If they can't, there must be a shadow in the room. If those two things don't work/happen, this student should be asked to leave.

Biting happens, but it shouldn't keep happening or be severe. That isn't fair to the other kids in the class. The biggest responsibility falls on the teachers to keep the kids safe. In my daughter's new room, she has been bitten twice, but the teachers literally pulled her arm out of another kid's mouth mid-bite. Huge huge improvement over how severe it was in her old classroom. 7+ months of scars on her face is a big problem and I would hate for anyone else to experience that.

Not a daycare situation but I nannied for another little girl alongside my daughter last year. Both went through the biting phase. My kid started it, and the other girl's mum was very, very good about it, even though it was obviously hard for her. It was interesting/stressful to me watching both girls do it, and to see how many attempted bites there were in a day. Like, I could stop ten attempted bites but miss one. Anyway, both girls got over it, but what I think helped us as parents was communication over what was happening and what to try next. If your daycare teachers are being open and you trust them, I would give it a bit longer, although maybe someone to shadow the biter is a good idea.

this happened at my son's daycare at right around the exact same age, all of the kids were 13/14 months.... and unfortunately he learned how to bit from the others and came home with bruises and was "the biter" a few times

We spoke with the teachers and asked their plan, they had a pretty strict punishment for it and said they try to nip this in the bud fast - the biting ended up lasting a few weeks then it seemed to pass. We were also very strict with LO when he tried to bite us, and we had a book about not biting your friends.

It was a pretty quick phase - i'd make sure the teachers are addressing it (I'm sure they are) and wait for it to pass.

@gilmoregirl: it sucks, doesn't it? One of the annoying things is that we'll have a couple weeks in a row with no issues, but just when we think we're safe it always seems to happen again. I know the teachers are trying, but there just aren't enough of them to pounce every time a kid gets it in his or her head to bite. I think this is what bothers my DH the most -- he thinks they're understaffed and aren't able to cope with the kids -- but our daycare actually maintains a better ratio than the state requires so it's not like it would be better elsewhere. And like a PP said, it still happened on occasion when she only had two LOs to watch.

@turkeylurkey: I know, and it's actually my biggest fear about the biting that's going on now. I don't want DD to learn that she can bite back or to start biting other kids. So far, she hasn't, but I know that could change at any moment.