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Yep, same situation with a coworker. i will help her out when it's not necessary trying to put a good vibe out there. Sometimes it works, sometimes it annoys her that "I didn't ask." 50/50 shot with her!

I do this and never really thought about why. I know I can't stand the feeling if disliking someone, and I think being annoyed all the time is not good for anyone. Maybe doing nice things just diffuses the tension for a bit?

Nope but I should. Makes total sense!

Love this idea! Having a bit of a hard time with my mother in-law at the moment. I decided a couple of days ago that I should tackle this by making a bigger effort & being nice even when it is not reciprocated. She is coming to visit soon & will be living in our home for a week. I think I will make point if spoiling her while she is here & hopefully this should help to build our relationship a little. I really want my child to have a good relationship with both grandparents!

Great idea!! I will try to do this more often.

It does work! There was a parent bad mouthing our school and complaining to other parents practically in front of me. I invited her to coffee so she could get linked in because she recently moved from another country. She never took me up on it but within a few months she was sending gifts and cupcakes.

@pui: that's what I try to do, it certainly makes it harder to dislike people when you are praying for them. Now, softening my heart enough to genuinely pray for those certain people is a whole other battle

Lol, yes! Our downstairs neighbor is an extremely immature, overreacting, passive aggressive crazy person and complains ALL THE TIME about how "loud" we are. During daytime hours. Lol. INstead of waging war against her I go out of my way to try and be quieter, I don't see a point in making an enemy out of a neighbor. But I did put her in her place last week when she put words into my mouth, I doubt she'll ever do that again ha!

Yes doing it with my FSIL. It doesn't make me like her anymore because she doesn't appreciate these things. I think I dislike her even more lol

If I'm around them yes, if not then I don't go out of my way. My (and this sounds so childish) ex best-friends Mother is a total bitch and ruined our friendship, she's now one of our clients and a high maintenance client at that. I have gone above and beyond many times, I only hope it makes her think.

It's a little harder to be extra nice to my ex husband and ex MIL.