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I have, but not with family. DH and I started trying (and kept it a secret because of our infertility issues), and my friend and her husband decided to have another one. Well, first month they were pregnant, and with twins. Not proud of this at all, but I hardly talked to her. I was so upset and hurt. Especially since her DH had made a comment about not wanting kids, and yet DH and I wanted one together so bad, and couldn't!

It would be really hard for your sister to see you get pregnant after she has been trying for so long, but at the same time, it would be hard for you to see your sister get pregnant when you feel like you actually want it more. I hope that you both can find happiness in what comes.

And good luck!

I hope you get pregnant before your sister!!
I've never been a super competitive person (aside from academics), but I get where you're coming from!
I'm the youngest of 3 and the only married one. (sisters are 34 and 37). I also gave my parents their first grandchild.
I think it wasn't easy for my sisters, and it took some time, but they got over it and LOVE my daughter.

Have I mentioned that I hope you get pregnant first? hehe. Either way, I hope your sis can be happy for you when you do get preggers, and vice versa.

Happy baby making!

I'm not going to lie. I've kind of been in your sister's position, and it sucks. My husband and I were the first to be married in his family, and his sister conceived and delivered during the time we were trying. As happy as I was for them, it was really hard on me for most of her pregnancy. So I will say if you get pg very quickly, please try to be sensitive to your sister's emotions.

And I don't want to be rude, but I'd be hesitant to judge your sisters yearnings for a child (or lack thereof), because you honestly don't know. I put on a 'no worries' type face for a lot of friends and family while ttc, just because I didn't want to unload of everyone all the time about how much it hurt. I was someone who always assumed there'd be a family, and even wanted to be a SAHM, but it wasn't until after a I realized how difficult it would be to have children, that the serious longing for a child kicked in. That doesn't make me any less deserving of a child than my SIL who wanted to ttc as soon as she was married.

All that said, your feelings are your feelings, and you both have you live your life. You can't wait to ttc until she gets pg, and she can't expect you to. And neither of you know how long it will take. Sending good vibes that you both get pregnant soon, and maybe if you're pg together the hurt feelings will be minimized. Because the bottom line is that you're sisters, and as long as you are both respectful of each other during a potentially difficult time for both of you, you'll be okay

The feelings are totally normal, especially between close friends and siblings. It's got to be hard for your sister to struggle to get pregnant, so I can understand her comment. She probably didn't intend it to be mean. But it's also okay for you to want the spotlight for a minute or to have a 'first' of your own. Maybe you'll get pregnant at the same time and can celebrate/commiserate on the ups and downs of pregnancy together.

In high school I was always the one flying under the radar to my over achieving sister and trouble-making athletic brother. So when I was starting grad school and my siblings were having their own issues, I was kind of happy to be the stable one with her act together for a while. I obviously want what's best for both of them and for them to be stable, happy, etc... but it was nice to have the recognition from my parents for once.

Now there is some competitiveness from my sister toward me (I'm pretty sure anyway, she's subtle) because of my pregnancy/baby. She has a 5 yr old, but wasn't speaking to us for the first 2+years of my niece's life, and lived out of state. Since I'm local and close to my family, I think there is some jealousy about the attention on me and DS. Although we all love and adore my niece and spoil her and my sister both when they are in town.

I agree with some of the PP's in saying that you really don't know what's going on with your sister and how badly she wants a child unless you go and have that discussion with her. For a long time I assumed my brother and SIL were just waiting for a good time for kids, but finally asked and learned that they've been TTC for 2 years and are having some pretty major issues. Meanwhile, throughout this time I got pregnant and had a baby. She didn't let on once that she was upset or jealous, which I'm sure she was, as any normal person in that situation would be.

Also, I'm the youngest and I'm the first to have a baby. I actually wish I weren't. I always liked having my older siblings to look up to and get advice from, and it was very weird for me not to have them to turn to during my pregnancy, childbirth, and now with the baby. Plus, it's weird for me that my baby will be the oldest grandchild, since I only know what it's like to be the baby.

I personally understand what it feels like to feel jealous of a sibling and deal with what feels like a constant competition. To sum it up it really really sucks. DH and I were engaged on Christmas Day 2009. During that time my middle sister showed no enthusiasm and then got pregnant by a guy she was dating less than 6 months a few monthd after. She spent the rest of the my engagement telling me how important babies are and how frivolous weddings are. I was heartbroken being the oldest not to give my parents their first grandchild and to have a nephew concieved and raised in really tough circumstances for what I felt was spotlight stealing.

Im now pregnant with my first child and 4 weeks after I discovered I was pregnant my sister is yet again pregnant with her second. Each phone call is filled with the fact that shes sicker, feeling movement first, and obsessed over having a girl before me because my parents only have grandsons. Our relationship is painful and difficult at times for my husband and I because it just feels like she is constantly trying to one up us.

Moral of the story, please be kind to one another. Nothing hurts worse than knowing or thinking a sibling is trying to take something precious from you or make theirs more important. All babies are special gifts, and should be celebrated that way regardless of who is "first"