I apologize in advance, but this will be a long story to get to the question. LO is 10 1/2 months old so we are in the midst of party planning. We are very excited and want to do something, but there are a lot of challenges. Here are our biggest concerns/issues:
1) LO was born on July 5th = holiday weekend. Not an issue per se, but a factor into what we plan.
2) DH comes from two very large families, and we have lots of siblings and close friends. Guest list with keeping to immediate family, grandparents (ours), and closest friends is 60 people. If we add our aunts/uncles/cousins we're over 125. That's NUTS to me!!
3) We have a very modest house with no way to fit all these people and we have a small backyard. It's nice, but small.
4) We dont' have/want a huge budget for this. $500-$750 no problem. $1,500 no way.
First world problems, I know, but I'd love some commentary or thoughts from my fellow bees. Originally we were going to include our aunts and uncles and open it up to the larger group but the stress of that was getting to me. We were not going to have it catered so how do we cook for that many people? We came up with a solution and it would have worked, but I started second-guessing this number of people. The smaller group of 60 is who we invited to our wedding. Having a first birthday party for a group larger than that is just kinda nuts. We want to do something but couldn't cut it back lower than the smaller group. So we made a little headway, party will be for the group of 60. It's a holiday weekend so we will likely get a few who can't make it, so it will be a very manageable 40-50 people, but that's still a lot of folks.
DH's aunt has graciously offered us to have the party at her place. She has an AMAZING yard, giant pool, grassy area with volleyball net, place for kids to play, outdoor cabana and bar - just amazing. She has offered more than once and sincerely means it. I am all for it because this gives something people to do. It is usually very hot in July and we have NOTHING at our house for the kids to do, let alone the adults. I think it would be much more fun for everyone, but DH doesn't want to do it since he is worried it will cause issues within his extended family because we're not inviting everyone. Even if we were to invite everyone, he was worried his dad's side would feel uncomfortable (since the two families know each other from ages ago, and his parents are divorced). He just doesn't want to do it and wants to have the party at our place.
So....party at our place totally stresses me out. He'll help, cook, clean, set up etc, but I am so worried about what to have these kids do or that people will be bored that it's all I can focus on. What I want to focus on is my invitations and decorations - the fun stuff for me. I really don't want to have to worry about games or entertainment at this party and I also don't want to spend the party cooking and serving everyone. I want to enjoy our company and my daughter. (I sound so whiny, huh? haha) So I came up with the idea that if we have to have it at our place that we just have pizza and salad, a giant cake, and then have the ice cream truck show up for anyone who wants ice cream. We could start around 3 or 4pm and just have it go for a couple of hours. DH is not thrilled with this idea either, but it removes so much of my stress. I can make pans of salad a day or two ahead of time, we have some pizzas delivered, drink some cocktails, and enjoy the night. It would be a short window versus having a cookout, so there is less concern for me with having something for the kids to do.
Am I being unreasonable about worry about cooking/hosting a party for 50+ people in our small backyard? For those who've done a larger party, did you enjoy it at all? Would you be offended by pizza and salad on July 4th weekend? And, if you can answer this question you win the golden prize, why is this making me so crazy when I know the party itself is not what matters?? Help!!