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Having guests address envelopes at shower... Is it tacky?

  1. catomd00

    grapefruit / 4418 posts

    IF you sent invitations someone must hve the address list, right?! I don't see why it's necessary. I think it could be practical to have them write it on a piece of paper, but seems lazy to have them write it on an envelope since they're doing part of the work of your thank you note for you.

  2. 2PeasinaPod

    pomelo / 5524 posts

    @bluestriped bee: It's not that I can't see the good in it. I'm sure it helps the mom-to-be out very much...but how much time does it take to write out an address on a thank you note? Again...I put a good amount of thought into my gift for someone, I don't think I'm asking for all that much in return by not having to address my own thank you note...my immediate thought after that is...will I have to write my own thank you note next?

  3. reverie

    kiwi / 661 posts

    I've been asked to do this at several showers. I really don't mind it... I mean there is so much else in the world that I can be offended by I'm not upset by writing my address down.

    I do think "meh" when the thank you is super generic though if I have gone out of my way to get you something nice / thoughtful!

  4. HabesBabe

    grapefruit / 4400 posts

    I think it's tacky. Like others have said, you were sent an invite, so they obv have your address.

    For my bridal shower, my BMs gifted me a set of Thank You cards that were already addressed to the people who RSVPed to the shower.

  5. rachiecakes

    coconut / 8279 posts

    I would've been sooo happy if people did this at my shower! I had severe pregnancy carpal tunnel and could barely feed myself with my sore, swollen hands, never mind write. I had to do my thank yous after I delivered DS!

    My mother would've been horrified though and would think it's extremely tacky.

  6. Chuckles

    persimmon / 1494 posts

    @dagret: agreed about the generic photo thank yous!

  7. HabesBabe

    grapefruit / 4400 posts

    @2PeasinaPod: I've seen "Mad Libs" style thank you card templates! So you address your own envelope, and then fill in the blank of your gift details... so you pretty much are writing your own TY card!

    Dear ____ (your name here),

    Thank you so much for the ____________ (gift you got here). Baby HabesBabe will truly enjoy __________ (-ing verb here) with it.

    Love,
    HabesBabe

  8. dagret

    grapefruit / 4235 posts

    @2PeasinaPod: I had probably 75-100 thank yous to write for my various baby showers, (VERY large families on both sides) so having the addresses written on the thank you cards, especially when I had pregnancy-induced carpal tunnel, actually did save a LOT of time. And gave me more time to write sincere thank you notes than sloppy generic ones.

  9. Ginabean3

    pomegranate / 3401 posts

    @HabesBabe: are you kidding me!? Now THAT's tacky!

    I've personally never addressed an envelope to myself at a shower, it wouldn't bother me but I personally would not like it done at my own shower!

  10. mamimami

    grapefruit / 4120 posts

    Crass.

    Find the address. Make an effort!

    @HabesBabe: That is so bad.

  11. Synchronicity

    grapefruit / 4089 posts

    I don't understand the sentiment behind "I put a lot of thought and effort into the gift so I expect effort to be put into a thank-you card in return". Is that really the point? I mean, it's just an address on an envelope... At least they plan on sending thank-you cards at all!

  12. MamaBehr

    pomegranate / 3275 posts

    This is tacky? Well, I guess I'm tacky. I think it's great. I like when people have done it for me and I do not mind doing it for others.
    Really, if I like you enough to attend your shower, buy you a gift, I won't be offended because I need to write my address down on an envelope.

  13. looch

    wonderful pear / 26210 posts

    Ummm, labels?

  14. mamimami

    grapefruit / 4120 posts

    @Synchronicity: I don't think it's the idea that the gift-ee needs to make some huge effort, but I don't think she should expect the same person who is showing her love and consideration by giving a gift, to also write half the thank you note for her. I mean, why don't the gifters also stamp the envelopes? It's just 49 cents, right? No big whoop.

  15. catomd00

    grapefruit / 4418 posts

    @looch: or the other person that helped make the baby?!

  16. Bao

    GOLD / wonderful apricot / 22276 posts

    To add to my previous reply, I'm very happy to help out by writing down my address on an envelope if I actually receive a thank you. I haven't received a thank you note from any wedding/shower in FIVE years!!

  17. Synchronicity

    grapefruit / 4089 posts

    @mamimami: The address is hardly half the thank you note, and it's by far the least important part. Like I said, I've never seen it done before, but I'm fairly confident that my friends and family wouldn't judge me if this was something that I chose to do - if that makes us tacky, so be it.

    @Bao: Exactly! I rarely receive thank-you notes at all anymore.

  18. bunnylove08

    grapefruit / 4442 posts

    we did it at our shower and I didnt think it was tacky when we were asked at someone else's shower. We used the names as an entry to a raffle and at the end someone won a prize.

  19. HabesBabe

    grapefruit / 4400 posts

  20. Mamaof2

    squash / 13208 posts

    @HabesBabe: from a 5 year old ? fine

    From an adult??? no!!

  21. mamimami

    grapefruit / 4120 posts

    @Synchronicity: I guess your thank you notes must be longer than mine LOL!

  22. NeekieRose

    persimmon / 1386 posts

    @looch: exactly. Does anyone not have the guest list in an electronic form?

    I find it very tacky. Had to do this at a relative's bridal shower and was put off by it. Seriously, you can't address the thank you notes? There a lot of things that are "easier", like not sending a thank you note at all. But that kinda defeats the whole point.

    Love the idea of a gift basket with the thank you notes and labels. Very thoughtful gift.

  23. 2PeasinaPod

    pomelo / 5524 posts

    @HabesBabe: That would have totally sent me over the edge!

    @dagret: I'm right there with you on the number of thank you notes I needed to write! I still took the time to write out the addresses on the envelopes. Meh...maybe I'm a crotchety old woman.

    @looch: @catomd00: Yes and yes! Why does the dad-to-be get off the hook??

    @Bao: This also blows my mind! How do you not thank people for a gift that they've given you???

  24. Mrs. Lemon-Lime

    wonderful pea / 17279 posts

    I wouldn't go as far as calling it tacky, but it does come off as lazy. Usually shower invites are mailed. So why not just address thank you notes at the same time?

  25. Ginabean3

    pomegranate / 3401 posts

    @HabesBabe: Oh my.....I think if I got one of these at a shower I would just take my present back.

  26. Bao

    GOLD / wonderful apricot / 22276 posts

    @2PeasinaPod: we most recently sent a Christmas gift to BIL's gfs son and have yet to even get a fb message/text from either one of them.

  27. .twist.

    pineapple / 12802 posts

    I feel like tacky and crass are just ... really? Meh. I guess I'm tacky and crass in all the wrong (right!) ways?!

  28. youboots

    honeydew / 7622 posts

    @simplyfelicity: yup this is how I feel about it.

    I'm addressing my shower Thank You's and birth announcements at the same time.

  29. dagret

    grapefruit / 4235 posts

    @2PeasinaPod: hah no worries. I have a hunch that this is a regional issue.

  30. mauxie

    persimmon / 1043 posts

    I wouldn't mind having to fill one out but I personally wouldn't have my guests do it.. I feel like if they made the effort to prepare a gift, then I should write a proper thank you note/envelope on my own time.. Plus, I like stationery

  31. travellingbee

    hostess / papaya / 10219 posts

    I did this at a friend's shower and thought it was odd but I wasn't offended or anything. It did seem really weird when I got the thank you in the mail, addressed in my own handwriting. I wouldn't do it myself...

  32. Mrs.Pinecone316

    persimmon / 1316 posts

    I have done this a couple times at shower. I thought it was a good idea and super helpful to the bride/ Mother to be. It would take a lot more than asking me to spend 10 seconds to fill out an envelope to make me think something was tacky.

  33. Synchronicity

    grapefruit / 4089 posts

    @.twist.: I'm right with you! Haha. Us tacky Canadian girls!

  34. autumnlove

    hostess / wonderful watermelon / 39513 posts

    I wouldn't want this at my shower but it wouldn't bother me to make a self addressed envelope for someone else.

  35. sarac

    pomelo / 5093 posts

    Super tacky, imho. What I've seen is the person hosting sitting there writing down the gifts, and then a helper going around for each gift and quietly getting the gift givers address and addressing the envelope. That's a nice compromise.

  36. Mrs. Coral

    clementine / 812 posts

    I think it's tacky. More so at a wedding shower though, than a baby shower. At a baby shower at least it's one more thing to help the new mom. At a wedding shower, I'm just like, I got a gift and am taking time out of my day--I have to address an envelope for the thank you note you are going to write ME?!

    Best case scenario the hostess uses mailing labels and just prints a second set for the guest of honor.

  37. .twist.

    pineapple / 12802 posts

    @Synchronicity: We're really polite except for when we address thank you notes. lulz.

  38. Mamasig

    pomegranate / 3565 posts

    I think it's tacky. I also write out addresses for the most part and not use labels. The point of a thank you card is that you took time out of your day to thank a person, they shouldn't do part of the job!

  39. Anya

    nectarine / 2784 posts

    I personally would skip it. Reminds me of the drs office when you address your own appt reminder card for next time.

    If you don't know or cant easily obtain my address, I feel like we aren't close enough for you to be inviting me to your shower in the first place.

  40. birdofafeather

    pineapple / 12053 posts

    @blackbird: yes! it always trips me out when i see a postcard/envelope with my own name and handwriting.

    i did this at a shower last week and i get the sentiment, but i think it's weird because they mailed me an invite, so someone has my address!

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