Hello Hellobee community! I used to be pretty active on here when I was going through infertility treatments. I've been MIA for a while now. Life, kids, etc.

I know I probably need to find a new support group but this was the first place I thought of when I received some pretty devastating news on Friday. I have breast cancer.

I'm going in tomorrow for an MRI and so I don't know the full plan yet. But I can't suppress my anger right now. I don't think anyone should have to deal with cancer. But I think if you have been through infertility it's a REALLY shitty thing to have to also go through cancer.

I'm mad. I'm sad. I'm scared.

I feel familiar feelings I had when I was in the throes of infertility treatments. That sense of "guarded optimism" so you could handle whatever news came your way after each cycle. It was a rollercoaster. One I was happy to get off of after the birth of our second child.

And now I feel like I'm standing in line for a new roller coaster. One I do not want to get on.