Just curious...
Just curious...
127 votes
coffee bean / 40 posts
I'd love to know why/why not! Our little one is due in July and we can't decide to or not. I've read it used to be for hygeine but I think don't think that's as strong as an arguing point anymore.
grapefruit / 4455 posts
Yes. Honestly it came down to cultural norms. Medically speaking it could be argued either way. It didn't seem to bother him at all so I was thankful for that.
hostess / wonderful grape / 20803 posts
We did not for either of our sons (nor will we for baby 3). My husband isn't circumcised but they didn't have too much to do with it. Our reasons were: not medically necessary and becoming more of the norm not to.
persimmon / 1111 posts
@Veggie: we did not. There was no medical benefit to. I had a few grown up friends who are not and have never had hygiene issues. I also had two friends who had sons that had complications after the procedure. They were minor complications, but painful. I just saw no benefits to the procedure when it could cause pain
DH was for it. I told him to watch 3 YouTube videos showing the procedure (not scare videos, but FYI) and we would discuss. After watching how the procedure was done he agreed that it didn't seem necessary.
coffee bean / 40 posts
@Pollywog: My husband is and I feel like the decision is more his to make because he's more familair with it lol. His opinion is that if there's a reason for it ok but if its just a choice then no, but we both don't know enough to feel comfortable making that call
nectarine / 2115 posts
I let my husband make this decision. DH was circumcised, but he chose not to have our son circumcised. My biggest concern was our son not looking like Daddy, but since there is no religious reason for it (for us), and no conclusive evidence in favor of doing it for health reasons, he decided there was no reason to do it.
nectarine / 2400 posts
@Veggie: we did. My husband is not but he felt strongly that we should. He said that being in a locker room in high school he would rather have been. Is my area it's still very much the norm so we did. I still don't feel like it's necessary but the procedure went fine and we haven't had any problems
pomegranate / 3314 posts
He is not and neither is my husband. We just didn't have a strong enough reason to do it.
nectarine / 2987 posts
@Veggie: I was against it because it isn't medically necessary, and it is painful. My husband was having a hard time deciding, but then we had a baby in the NICU and he was like no more pokes and needles and procedures! I'm generally against body modifications for people too young to consent. It's the same reason we didn't have our daughter's ears pierced as a baby.
pomelo / 5573 posts
No, neither of them. We had no religious reason to do it and there are no medical reasons and so I wasn't going to put a baby through what is basically cosmetic surgery.
pomegranate / 3350 posts
When my oldest son was born, the AAP at that point recommended routine circumcision (because they said it lowers disease transmission) and DH is circumcised so we had it done. And then with our other sons we didn't want them to be different. I ultimately left the decision up to DH but I was on the fence at best.
blogger / wonderful cherry / 21616 posts
@winniebee: same.
Neither of our boys are. I couldn't find it to be medically justifiable.
Actually, when the pediatrician came to see my second son in the hospital, he was very pleased to learn we weren't circumsizing and said he agreed with our decision.
grapefruit / 4800 posts
We didn't. DH parents are European and it's not common there. So we didn't see any reason to.
grapefruit / 4455 posts
@skipra: I did the same (ultimately leaving it up to DH.) I thought AAP still recommended that, oops.
clementine / 874 posts
Yes, I was (still am) on the fence about it. It meant enough to DH that I ultimately differed to him. I was in the room during DS's circ. Let's just say I hope we have a girl next.
pomegranate / 3350 posts
@2littlepumpkins: actually I don't know if they officially changed it but it seems much less common. The OB told us it was the recommendation when LO1 was born but no one really said anything with our other two. I think the recommendation had just changed with our first so maybe that is why she mentioned it.
pomelo / 5258 posts
DS isn't. I had DH make the decision. I didn't feel strongly about it but wouldn't have it done.
pear / 1703 posts
Yes for cultural reasons and now that all is said and done I'm glad we did it. Honestly though the experience was really difficult for me. I'm so squeamish that I couldn't even be in the room when the procedure was performed. Even during the few days it took to heal DH had to do all diapers bc I couldn't bear look at it
nectarine / 2148 posts
We did. DH is and he wanted to so I let him decide. It wasn't a big deal to me. It didn't cause DS ant pain and was healed in less than a week.
apricot / 424 posts
We did it. The doctor made it clear that the diseases it helps prevent aren't something we need to worry about unless we lived in a 3rd world country, but I have a friend that needed to do it for medical reasons as an adult. He talked with me about how it was the most traumatizing thing he had ever done. And previous to this happening to him he had a son he didn't circumcise. So after that we decided to do it.
pomegranate / 3355 posts
We did. We both wanted to. DH is as well. It's the norm in our area (not that this mattered one bit). Personally I'm glad we did I think it's easier for me to take care of. And it didn't really bother DS and it healed very quickly.
eta: I find it odd that the majority of votes say yes but the responses seem to lean heavily towards no. interesting.
grapefruit / 4988 posts
No, we didn't. I asked my OB for current recommendations and she said it was just personal preference. DH has it done but we couldn't think of a good reason to do it for DS so we didn't bother.
@Ajsmommy: You don't actually need to do anything special to take care of it, just fyi.
wonderful pear / 26210 posts
We didn't circumcise. My husband is, but given the fact that procedure is now done only in the hospital under general anesthesia, we elected to skip it for our then newborn (this is not in the US, it is continental Europe).
pomelo / 5720 posts
I let DH decide and we opted to do it, as DH is also circumcised, If it had been up to me only we would not have done it because I don't think it's necessary.
apricot / 485 posts
No, we didn't see any reason to. They do say that the benefits outweigh the risk (meaning you might get miniscule benefits but the risks are also miniscule, basically) but they don't recommend routine circumcision as far as I'm aware. I find it really odd to cut something off just for aesthetic reasons, and that is really the reason everyone is doing it. My husband is, but still didn't see any good reason to.
pomegranate / 3375 posts
@Veggie: We decided before having kids that we wouldn't circumcise our sons if we had any. The AAP doesn't recommend it anymore, and there are not true medical benefits. I also worried about the associated trauma and pain (there are risks involved), and it just wasn't worth it.
pomelo / 5257 posts
My son is. To be honest, I don't know that I would do it again. But it went fine and all is good now. Not sure what we'll do for future sons.
@littlejoy: the AAP basically says it's up to the parents' preference--it is safe for those who want to: "Evaluation of current evidence indicates that the health benefits of newborn male circumcision outweigh the risks and that the procedure’s benefits justify access to this procedure for families who choose it." Just wanted to clarify that the AAP doesn't recommend against it either, more that it's down to preference.
pomegranate / 3375 posts
@MrsSCB: Sure. It used to be recommended, and it's no longer recommended. Good distinction though. Language can be tricky - like someone might think that means they suggest NOT doing it, when they just don't take a stance either way at this point. But, it definitely did influence my overall opinion of the procedure.
pomelo / 5257 posts
@littlejoy: Yes, exactly. AAP is basically neutral, and our doc said the same thing -- outlined the arguments on both sides and then said it was mostly down to what we wanted. I'm kind of hoping we have a girl next so we can bypass the decision altogether...
pomegranate / 3375 posts
@MrsSCB: I have a best friend who found herself centering PPD around the circumcision decision. Even though everything went really well and there were no issues, it was the one choice she was dwelling on. She saw a counselor about the depression, and once she realized that was the root of it (well, maybe not the root, but where she was letting it manifest), the doctor was like, "You know you don't have to make the same choice next time if you don't want to." - It helped her immensely ... she realized that her son was super healthy, happy, and she made the right decision at the time. The whole situation was really interesting to me, and I appreciated that the doctor didn't bash her valid decision and resulting feelings.
pomelo / 5257 posts
@littlejoy: I appreciate that and can relate -- the procedure went totally fine, and my son has always been a very happy, easygoing (as far as small children go...) kid. But I still think if I could go back in time, I don't know that I would make the same choice.
nectarine / 2951 posts
Both boys are circumcised- tends to be the norm in our social group and family. We wanted our boys to be like their dad. I actually don't know many people who haven't circumcised their sons, so this post is super interesting to me.
squash / 13199 posts
@Veggie: I think for most people its religious or cultural reasons. We are christians but have african heritage and it is the norm for our boys to be circumcised.
pomelo / 5573 posts
This is obviously a personal decision, but I really don't get the "we wanted them to match their dad" argument. Little boys are different from their dads in a lot of ways. I obviously don't have a penis, but do little boys really look at their dad's and ask why theirs is different? And if they do, it is a hard thing to explain? "People used to think that that way was better, but now they know that it isn't really, so babies don't need it anymore." It seems like a pretty simple explanation.
pomegranate / 3375 posts
@erinbaderin: I agree with you. DH and I have talked about this - he has no idea what his dad's penis looks like, and he's totally ok with that.
I also don't understand the, "I don't have a penis so I let my husband decide" stance. It's an actual medical procedure that physically changes your child - there are risks. I think this should be a thoughtful, mutual decision (made after reviewing information on both sides). The only time I would consider letting my husband's opinion trump mine would be if there was a religious belief at play. Even then, I'd want to be sure it fits with *our* philosophy as a family.
honeydew / 7622 posts
This is one of the very few topics DH and I disagree on.
Our DD is 26 months and we are talking about a second in the next couple years. We will probably have to go to see my therapist together (so far he has not been with me in three years) to hash this one out if we have a son.
grapefruit / 4455 posts
@erinbaderin: maybe it's not an argument. Maybe they genuinely just wanted their kid to be the same as them. I dunno, like I said, I ultimately left it up to dh.
blogger / apricot / 389 posts
I ultimately left it up to my husband to decide. He is circumcised, and I thought he would decide to. Ultimately he decided not to. Our reasons were
- it's not as common anymore
- it's not medically necessary
- our son could not consent
- it can affect breastfeeding
- it costs money
- we didn't want to decide solely for him looking like his dad
- it's painful
I have zero issue with them - but we couldn't follow through with it.
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