Hellobee Boards

@periwinklebee: How are you doing?

@Mrs. Oreo: For me cheapies are barely positive at 11dpo and would definitely give a negative at 10dpo. My bfp all three times has been at 11dpo and I had to confirm with a frer to believe it. You are definitely still in.

I think dominobee said she wouldn't be around much this month since it's a non medicated cycle.

@Mrs. Oreo: I completely understand! This is coming from someone who said they wouldn't test until 14dpo....yeah, I think I tested at 8.

@Mrs. Oreo: I'm hopeful for you! 10dpo is really early still

@periwinklebee: that's great news about the dark lines! I hope you get everything worked out soon so you can see your new doc.

AFM I'm on whole30 day 13. I got a positive opk earlier this week but I'm not temping so I can't confirm exactly when O happened. This has been an awful week so I'm just happy we were able to BD at all. I'm trying to put my energy into caring for myself and put TTC out of my mind as much as possible. Even if I'm not checking in much I think about you ladies and I'm hoping for lots more Bfps this month!

@bhbee: thanks

@mrslibrarian: Responding to your very old question, I've read that different women ovulate at different times after a positive OPK. I think the idea is that if you're someone who releases the egg late you'll want some fresh sperm in there. Even so, four days seems like a long time. My doc says BD on the day of the positive OPK/trigger or the next morning, then the two days after that. But we also try to BD on the days leading up to a positive OPK, since I'm pretty much like clockwork both medicated and unmedicated.

@bhbee: Girl I am the same way, re: acting crazy during the TWW even though I'm normally a really practical person and I especially hate to waste time!

@Mrs. Oreo: Ugh I'm so sorry! I got an e-mail about your post on my wall but I've just really been avoiding anything TTC-related this month. I feel bad about waiting so long to respond though, and I really appreciate you checking in on me.

Today is Mother's Day which is always a hard day for me, since my mom died when I was a baby and my relationship with my step-mom, who has raised me since I was 2, has always been tenuous. I'm not going to get too much into my family dynamic, but basically I have trauma from my childhood that no one in my family acknowledges. It really sucks to be made to feel like I'm essentially delusional and making up a painful childhood.

I also just generally feel lately like my family despises me. Or at least that they don't like me. I'm constantly trying to say the right thing and feel accepted and part of the group, but then I still always feel like I'm somehow an outsider in my own family. My sisters planned a whole day for my mom for mother's day, and didn't invite me. My parents and one sister live about 4 hours away while my other sister lives in the same town as me. The only reason I found out about their plans was b/c my brother started a group text asking what my mom might want for mother's day, and my sister was like "Not really, K-- and I are going to take her to brunch, then the flower conservatory then to get pedicures." Did not ask if I wanted to come. Just put it out there. I was already thinking about going to see my mom this weekend, until I realized I'm on call for work so I have to stay around town. But even though I couldn't go, it would have been nice to be invited. It actually really hurts my feelings that I wasn't, but if I told my sisters that they'd just once again tell me that I'm imagining the slight and that they didn't do anything wrong.

And then, of course the other reason Mother's Day is hard is because I'm not a mother, even though I want so badly to be one. DH and I have plans with friends today and when he came downstairs this morning he was like "wanna go to a flea market beforehand?" And I was like "No, I probably won't even go hang out with friends because I just don't want to do anything today." And he was like "why?" And I'm like, dude seriously? You don't realize how hard this day is for me? I've definitely told him in the past how Mother's Day is hard for me, even before TTC. Last year was the first mother's day of TTC without being pregnant, and that was rough but okay since we were just at the one-year mark. But to now be going through a second mother's day of TTC is just heart-wrenching. I feel like I can't look at Facebook and Instagram at all because it's just pictures of people with their moms and/or babies.

Woof... okay now that I've spewed all my emotions, here's the TTC update. I am switching to Femara this cycle, doing the trigger shot, then IUI, then progesterone. I really, really hope this works and results in a healthy, sticky pregnancy because I'm seriously not sure how much more disappointment I can handle. After two years of TTC a MC would probably send me over the edge. That's really my biggest fear at this point.

@dominobee: aw thanks, you are the best! I hope things have been going well for you.

Also I think one of the things that makes today hard is the social media aspect, and the fact that I can't just post how I feel today unless I want every one of my family, friends, casual acquaintances and colleagues to know I'm dealing with infertility. It's all about moms - as it should be - but no one posts an ode to the women who want to be parents but aren't. Or to women who have had miscarriages or, God forbid, have dealt with the death of a child.

@Coral: Thanks

@dominobee: sending lots of love. I know this day is hard on so many levels. Do what you need to do to care for yourself.

@dominobee: I'm really sorry for the family issues - that sucks As if mother's day isn't hard enough...

Know that when you do get pregnant we're here for you, and the odds will be in your favor. A therapist or someone to talk to IRL can help too if it causes a lot of anxiety. What you've been through over the past couple of years is incredibly tough, you have seriously earned the right to indulge in whatever kind of self care works.

@periwinklebee: So, I the only one I remember watching from this list was the one that says "for the first month of pregnancy." Maybe you could go down this list and find one that resonates with you/doesn't feel cheesy, etc. I liked ones that focused on fetal growth and that my body knew what it was doing.

https://www.google.com/search?q=guided+imagery+pregnancy&safe=strict&client=ms-android-att-us&prmd=vin&source=lnms&tbm=vid&sa=X&ved=0ahUKEwiV0dG1qPDTAhVBOCYKHfziD4kQ_AUICSgB&biw=412&bih=652&dpr=2.63

Update: I literally have laid around and done nothing all day. There is a pile of clean laundry on the other couch that my husband put there this morning. I have not started folding it. Not sure if I will. Also skipped out on my MIL's Mother's Day dinner. DH was understanding, and anyway it's nice for them to have some one-on-one time. So often when they see each other I'm there too or it's in some larger social situation.

I just ordered a pizza and a salad and a soda even though I'm not hungry. The only place that has decent pizza and delivers (DH has the car) is closing in 20 minutes so I thought I might as well just order it because I'm definitely going to want pizza at some point tonight. Really just DGAF about anything today!

@dominobee: Humor helps, you too soon may be carrying a cup of your husbands sperm in your bra

@snarkybiochemist: Anyway how are you doing? What DD board are you on again?

@dominobee: november, i'm doing ok my nt scan is tomorrow and we told our families this weekend