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I would go back and get more information. I'm not sure that you need to read anything into her comments, but I would ask for clarification. What are they teaching that the teacher thinks she isn't absorbing? What are the teacher's concerns exactly and can she give you examples? I wouldn't interrogate her, but it sounds like she could be a little more specific.

Three weeks isn't a long time to adjust to a new place and new people, so these could be real issues, or they could be entirely attributable to the adjustment period. Three year-olds are definitely still mastering their impulses and at least in my experience, they're also just starting to figure out how to engage with other people and children for longer periods of time/in more meaningful ways. It wouldn't necessarily bother me that she says she's not making connections, assuming she means with other children. Also, everyone needs to be left alone to do their own thing sometimes and some need more of it than others. That can look kind of strange in a group setting, but it isn't necessarily a sign of a problem.

As for memorizing things, does she repeat things you've read/sung at home to you? I'll be honest, my feeling is that memorization should not be emphasized in preschool, so if she's simply not repeating back rhymes, stories, or songs when prompted, but sometimes repeats them when she's playing on her own, I wouldn't be worried. My LO would (and still does!) stealthily repeat new information during play. It sometimes comes out at unexpected times, so you might have to watch for it rather than try to prompt it.

@loveisstrange: Yes, that makes sense and sounds very familiar and normal! I would talk to the teacher, but I wouldn't worry. The random repetition of things (not when an adult wants her to, but when she wants to) will likely keep going for a while. LO is 5 and he still does this a lot--it's pretty fun to watch! So will the stubborn refusal to answer questions/answering incorrectly on purpose, which can be uber frustrating, but is really just a sign that they've moved on to other more interesting things and we adults should too! It sounds like there isn't anything to be concerned about unless the school is not very flexible.

@loveisstrange: Is there a guidance counselor at the center? PreK may be young for having a GC, but typically screening goes through their office unless you want to have her screened elsewhere (PCP, child therapist, etc). I think she is a bit young for the screening (just my opinion!), but talking with guidance/PCP/therapist may help give you some support as you work on behavior concerns

If you're gifted, chances are she is too. Have her screened with a Weschler test by a PsyD. We used the WPPSI-iv because S was only 2 yrs 9 mos at the time, and I think that's still the one they would use until the age of 5 or 6, when they would use the WISC. It gave us SO MUCH insight into her behaviors and needs, and I really recommend it. Gifted kids are mislabeled as ADHD so very often-- I really doubt that's the issue. Feel free to wall me if you'd like to talk a bit more, since our girls are the same age, and I have some similar experience.

Eta: my gifted kid is aggressive when she's bored, frustrated, or overstimulated (sensory OE). She's bitten others. It sucks and I'm sorry you're struggling. It can be really overwhelming.

@loveisstrange: I think that definitely an odd comment this early in the school year! I honestly don't think at 3 years old, its even possible to make that assumption until someone has been around your child for months. Starting a new class is a huge adjustment at this age and some kids need more time than others. I'd disregard it until she's much further into the school year.

@loveisstrange: Yikes! No fun My daughter bit her teacher because she pulled her off the fence on the playground after several warnings to stop climbing it. When I talked to the pediatrician about it, he said that if she had bit another kid, he wouldn't be worried, but he was concerned that it was a teacher (apparently it's not common to bite authority figures?)

What's your LO's love language? DD1's is touch, and even when she's in the worst possible meltdown, I find that most of the time, she just needs a hug and someone to tell her it's going to be ok.

@erinpye: good input - I'll have to look into that for mine as well.

@loveisstrange: While biting isn't common at this age, I think it still does occur as a defensive mechanism. LO is 4 and her BFF bit her twice in the last two weeks of summer preschool program. In both cases she had done something to upset/anger him and that was his reaction.

Emotions are very hard still for these kids and sometimes the only way they know how to let it out is physically.

It sounds like overall the teacher isn't terribly concerned.

I wanted to add that LO just started her pre-K program and while she does know her teachers names she doesn't know all of her classmates names. And I've noticed her verbal communication regress, she's really having a hard time organizing her thoughts lately and I think it's because she's overloaded and tired. At times she can really struggle to form a complete sentence.