I just snapped at my daughter this morning, "Stop reading!!" She is suddenly reading like crazy. On the toilet, on the way out the door, when she is supposed to be buckling her booster seat! I thought I would never do a thing to hinder her learning...lol! Never say never.
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"Tattoos aren't forever" when DD was screaming about her fading temporary tattoo.
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"Don't pee on your brother!"
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I told E she couldn't have her apple until she had eaten some French fries. Whaaaat??!
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"We dont touch other people's pee-pee's. Leave your brother's alone."
life with boys
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"Because I said so," as we are firmly in why land these days. Also, "stop licking me."
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These are so good!!
I didn't know I would have to say, "Put your pants on" so many times in a row. -
"peepee does not come out of your bum". Seriously. I had to say that this morning.
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"Please get your face out of the toilet!"
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@stargal: Oh, so many times. "Dont grab your penis!!"
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K don't step on your sister's head.
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@wrkbrk: lmao!!! Story of my life! It's like I have a whole new understanding of the male species(ha) since having a boy. I gave up he has to hold it the whole time he's taking a bath.
🙄
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My daughter is 12 months.
"No, thank you, I do not want to eat your booger." Said as she tried to feed it to me.
No, we do not eat rocks, stink bugs, cat hair, dirt clods, pine cones, books, game pieces, Legos, candy wrappers, cat food, etc.
I knew babies like to try to put things in their mouths, but I didn't quite realize the lengths my kid would go to eat everything she could get her hands on.
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@stargal: Yes I have said that several times! The latest is "Please don't rub your penis on the wall."
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"Stop licking your leg." He dropped strawberry shortcake on his leg and started licking it.
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This thread is amazing.
Bracing myself for future penis comments ALL THE TIME - he is just turning 2, so diapers are still an effective "penis containment device" here.ETA: Last night he peed in the potty for the first time, so I did get to say "way to go - you're peeing in the potty! Yay!!" while his pee was actually going directly over the splash guard and all over me...
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"Don't bite the cat."
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@MrsLonghorn: LOL! What you said was more effective than accuracy....i.e. You're peeing somewhat near the potty!
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"We don't sit on the baby's head."
"We don't put baby in a choke hold."
"We don't try to suffocate the baby with a hat."
"We don't shove our lovey into our crotch."
"We don't pants Mommy." -
"it's not kind to pull Harry's eyebrows" (Harry is our dog)
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@LindsayLou: lol yes! The amount of this in my DD mouth is disgusting.
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@gingerbebe: we don't pants mommy. Pretty sure that's the best one!
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"You do not have to get naked to poop!"
Seriously, all her clothes come off when she poops.
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@avivoca: Story of my life for a very long time! He used to completely undress to use the potty at all but he's gotten better about wearing his clothes now :). It used to make me laugh!
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"Please do not look yerpie's paw!" Yerpie is our dog and she smelled his paws because I made the mistake of telling her dog's feet smell like Fritos (I forget why). She agreed and thought she should see if it tastes like Fritos as well
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@littlebug: I have to tell my DD not to put her face on the toilet ALL. THE. TIME. We are potty training and she wants to kiss the potty to thank it ewwwwwwwww.
Also, not to hide vegetables in her pullups.
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@littlebug: I've had to say this more than I'd like. DS likes to stick his face right in when he flushes.
🙄
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