LO is 12 days old, and we’re off to a rough start with feeding. Hospital had us supplement with formula from the start because she was so small, but I started trying to bf immediately, too, and pumping to try to get my supply started. Even colostrum was slow to start. The lactation consultant said things looked good and to give it time. Initially I would nurse first, then we'd give her a bottle because she was still hungry. Then I'd pump. It was very hit or miss. At first, I thought she wasn’t getting enough milk, but she has started rejecting nursing altogether. I thought maybe it was bottle preference that she doesn’t want to work harder at my breast, but my let down has already gushed out of her mouth where she just wasn’t sucking even a little bit. Sometimes she refuses to try to latch at all and pushes me away screaming, even if there is no milk flowing yet. The pediatrician didn’t see any tie issues. I’m pumping and we’re feeding breastmilk by bottle at least. My supply has gotten better but it's still not enough so we are supplementing with formula, too. Trying to nurse is miserable. Sometimes she’ll latch for just a few minutes, and then I end up leaking all over both of us. But then if I try to pump afterwards it’s not enough to empty, and I’ve had to work out a few hard spots already. So I’m almost exclusively pumping now, which sucks. I was supposed to have a consult with an LC last night but she didn’t get back to me. I am looking for another LC but in the meantime just looking for ideas or suggestions or solidarity. Breastfeeding is so stressful, but she’s at least eating well from the bottle and at least getting breastmilk. She is back up over birth weight, though, so I’m trying to stay positive.