Vacations and TTC « Hellobee Boards

Vacations and TTC

By raspberries Dec 3, 2014

How did you handle vacation planning when you were TTC? Especially those of you who took a while to conceive?

We're on month 9 of TTC, and we've been putting off vacations (most recently, a wedding in India that's happening next week that I'm so so sad to be missing) because I naively imagined I'd immediately be pregnant. We were just offered an opportunity to travel with some close friends to Spain for two weeks in July of next year. I guess I'm just hoping to find out how other people have dealt with this - I don't want to put my life indefinitely on hold, but I also don't want to put TTC on hold (especially since it seems like this is going to take a while!)

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Tags: vacation , ttc

18 comments

MaryM
pomelo / 5129 posts

Dec 3, 2014

My mom and I have been planning to go to Ireland when I graduate (in May). My plan for that is to wait until March and start planning then. (I mean, I wouldn't mind traveling if I was a few months pregnant...it's more an issue if we can afford to travel if we're about to have a baby!)

I guess it's harder if other people are planning things and want to make definite plans earlier. With my husband's work schedule, it's hard to plan more than a week in advance anyway, so sometimes I fall back on that as an excuse.
YogiRunner
clementine / 849 posts

Dec 3, 2014

Hi! Go for it. You can TTC without putting life on hold. If you get a beautiful BFP this month, you can adjust what you need to for a very happy reason.

We went through the same thing when we started TTC (also 9 months ago) and were planning a December trip to Aussie (leaving in 3 weeks, yay!) At that point, there was a chance I'd be way too preggo to travel. I googled how many weeks the cut-off needed to be and counted backwards to what cycle a BFP would mean trouble... and then waited until we were in the clear before buying the tickets. You can always plan on going on your trip and then just wait a little longer before purchasing anything non-refundable. We were prepared for a low-key trip with a doctor's note and for me to grab the aisle seat for our flights, but were NOT going to put it off "just in case" unless i was past 35 weeks. Anyway, glad we didn't wait because AF showed up today, so now our trip will be during our 2WW (hoping to get some happy news while in Melbourne for New Years)

Anyway, I hope that's helpful, and best of luck to you. Plan your Spain trip and use it as a distraction during your next 2WW!!
MenagerieMama
pear / 1547 posts

Dec 3, 2014

Just go for it! After my miscarriage we were on month 5 or 6 of no BFPs and sort of just said screw it. Used the vacation days I had saved to pay for maternity leave for a trip to Thailand and we also got a puppy! Turns out that was our month - and it shouldn't have been, my husband was supposed to be out of town when I was ovulating but I ovulated early. Our puppy's adoption day was also my LMP for dating and I started the second trimester en route to Thailand! My only regret was I wouldn't have picked somewhere so hot if I'd known I was preggers, our original baby moon plan had been Italy, but it worked out just fine and the trip was great. And now I'm nursing my 2 mo LO!
raspberries
pear / 1955 posts

Dec 3, 2014

@MaryM: I think that's part of the issue - I always want to plan things waaay in advance, but TTC makes it hard to do that. I also don't know what to say to our friends about waiting to decide if we'll come - I might have to make up a white lie about getting through the holidays before planning a vacation? Our schedules are pretty set, and our friends know it, ha.

@YogiRunner: @MenagerieMama: Ahhh, this is great advice - thanks ladies! I calculated backwards and it looks like even if I conceived in this upcoming cycle, my due date wouldn't be until the middle of September, so I would be 32 weeks preg for the flight back to the US, which seems doable (daunting, but doable, haha.)
PurplePumps
pomegranate / 3809 posts

Dec 3, 2014

We've been TTC since end of 2012 and went on 2 international trips in 2013 and one this year. The only thing that stopped a second one this year was to stick around for IVF so the timing just didn't work out. What I did was to wait until about 2-5 months ahead to buy flights and plan the trip, so that if I did miraculously fall pregnant that cycle, I wouldn't be *too* pregnant to travel. I would definitely keep options open to travel next July, but wouldn't set anything in stone until March if I was not pregnant by then. After this long trying, you have to let yourself travel... it's been the consolation prize for me.
MaryM
pomelo / 5129 posts

Dec 3, 2014

@raspberries: Even though my mom knows we're TTC...I've been using money as the excuse not to plan until then. We have a few projects we want to get done next year too (redo our kitchen and buy a new house), so it's really believable to make it about waiting to see if we can budget for everything we want to do.

I find for most things, money is a solid excuse

It annoys me too. I'm a major planner. Plus I'd LOVE to have something to look forward to!
raspberries
pear / 1955 posts

Dec 3, 2014

@PurplePumps: Good advice, and so true. Travelling is the grand consolation prize these days.

@MaryM: Hmmm, that's a good idea - it wouldn't even be a white lie to say that we (ah-hem, read: I) spent more than I'd like to on Christmas gifts this year.
alohaorchid
persimmon / 1404 posts

Dec 3, 2014

We TTC'd for just over 3 years and we didn't let TTC get in the way of any vacation plans.
Shutterbug
grapefruit / 4703 posts

Dec 3, 2014

Another vote for booking the trip! It gives you something to look forward to, and if you do need to cancel, what a great reason to need to cancel! I've been on 4 international trips since we started TTC (in 2012 ) and I'm going on another one in a couple weeks.
MrsKRB
nectarine / 2465 posts

Dec 3, 2014

I feel you! I skipped a few months TTC because we are going to the BVI in February and I thought it would be more fun if I wasn't pregnant. I decided to hell with it though, with my luck I won't be KU anyway. And if I am, then it will be a good celebration! I say go for it and whatever is meant to be will be!
LindsayInNY
bananas / 9229 posts

Dec 3, 2014

I booked up until I knew I could safely travel. So this past July we went away but didn't book until January or so, "just in case." That was really my only restriction, if you want to call it that.
Astro Bee
pear / 1503 posts

Dec 3, 2014

I know how you feel about wanting to plan, but being afraid to. It was the same for DH and I. Our vacation plans for the last 5 years have been scuba-related vacations, and we've had some really amazing trips all around the world in that time. We'd decided that our next trip would be the Maldives. We were sort of NTNP since spring, but had discussed actually trying after a trip. We were very open to the possibility of getting pregnant sooner rather than later, but didn't think it would happen right away. Still, we decided to wait until last minute to book the trip. Thank goodness we did! The BFP came in early Aug, while we were still in preliminary planning phases. Unlike with regular vacations, we wouldn't have been able to go if I were pregnant. In the end, we still went on a trip, just with a change of venue (Greece and Turkey) and called it our babymoon!

@Raspberries: good luck! @PurplePumps and others give very good advice re only booking up til the safe travel travel point.
BSB
hostess / wonderful apple seed / 16729 posts

Dec 3, 2014

I've put both life and TTC on hold over the 3 years we been trying.

We've been waiting to move back to the east coast since we've first started TTC. Our plan was to get pregnant, have a baby and move back east. So naturally during the emotional journey of IF, I've contemplated moving back east before getting pregnant. I even put TTC on hold for 3 months while I job searched and submitted resume. After no leads and the feeling of wanting to start a family now and not wait for the 3 or 6 month delay if I were to find a job, get relocated and be at the job for 3 or more months so FMLA would protect my job when I get pregnant. Anyway, it sounded like it would be a 6 or more month hold on TTC. I just could add more to my wait. So we went back to our IUIs and pushed forward to do whatever it took to get pregnant... Which for us is now IVF. As much as I want to move back home, the wish and need to get pregnant was stronger. So that's where we are. Putting my work life & home life on hold for a baby. Which is fine, because there are actually some pros to staying with my company for now.

As for the vacation part, I say go for it. Take the trip, it will distract you if you aren't pregnant by that time. We travel, it's the one thing we do to distract us from the IF journey we've had. IF is tough and we think we are making the most of it. Plus, we don't know how much we can travel after having a baby.

Oh, our travel has been mostly domestic trips (Hawaii, Alaska, weekend travel), though I did go to Vietnam at the end of 2011. I am hoping we will get pregnant in 2015 and be able to take a baby moon to London. But if things don't plan out, I'm hoping to get back to Hawaii.
Crystal
grapefruit / 4028 posts

Dec 4, 2014

Go for it!
SugarplumsMom
bananas / 9227 posts

Dec 4, 2014

I'd book it if there's an option to cancel. It might turn out to be a babymoon, but just in case you don't feel like going, it'll really be nice to have that option. There's a good chance you'd be pregnant in the next few months. Babydust!!!
Mrsk
apricot / 287 posts

Dec 4, 2014

Can you buy travel insurance that covers you if you have to cancel.
edelweiss
grapefruit / 4923 posts

Dec 4, 2014

i say go for it. if you have to cancel, at least it would be for a really great reason!
PurplePumps
pomegranate / 3809 posts

Dec 4, 2014

oops, posted a reply in wrong thread.

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