Did you tell everyone right off the bat, or only as it came up/they needed to know?
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We have IF and are open about it, so everyone.
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I've only recently told a couple of people. My parents, my MIL, my bff and my cousin who went through IF. Besides that no one else knows.
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I picked DH and one other person, but it's actually two. I wouldn't really call my best friend and my mother a small circle.
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Only my husband. After two failed pregnancies and family and friends saying we shouldn't put ourselves through the stress again. I lost a lot of blood and needed a blood transfusion during my last d&c that it freaked everyone out. My DH and I really wanted to add to our family so we decided that we would keep it between us and wait until we have a bun in the oven and are in the save zone.
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We have been TTC for about 22 months, so at this point, we've been open about it with people we are close to.
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I'm confused how it would be a need to know for anyone other than your partner?
It was only DH and I who knew for the first year-ish (aside from HB
️). Now that we are battling IF, our parents know so they can protect us from prying comments and because of the medical implications.
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Only DH & I.
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First time around, we tried for 18 mos, and initially didn't tell anyone but towards the end had mentioned it to a couple of friends that had taken a while to conceive.
This time (#3) - we are only on month 2 and not really hard core yet but I feel more comfortable mentioning it to friends.
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Ttc 27 months now but only two of my friends know. I'm pretty private about it. I think i would be OK with being more open after we give up or are successful, but during this process I just want to keep to myself.
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@Crystal, I guess when I said "need to know" I was thinking of when you needed/wanted them to know (i.e. like when you decided to tell your parents so that they could be on your side during IF). My DH and I have kept it to ourselves, but if we end up going down the IF treatment path, I can foresee eventually needing to tell at least my mom, as the scope of the lies I'd have to tell to cover it up would be untenable.
I have friends and family members who have been so open about the moment they've started trying (and asked such blunt questions about our plans) that I started to feel like a real oddball wanting to keep it so private. It's very important to me, though.
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Only DH and I.
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We were pretty open with our infertility for round 1, so people know. Especially after our miscarriages this year, and still no pregnancy... so yep, open book.
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With my first pregnancy only my best friend knew. After my m/c, I was blogging so people knew we'd be trying again soon. With this one we set a planned time to start again, but actually started a month early (and were successful) so no one knew. My mom was really surprised when we told her I was pregnant before we were even planning to try.
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When we were TTC we told a few close friends but that was it. Now that we have decided to be childfree, we tell people that we are remaining CF but we don't mention out TTC history.
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DH (of course,) my sister and best friend knew. More people knew after our miscarriage because it was obvious that we were trying to expand our family.
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I chose other. Two good friends of mine are on HB so they know :). I've mentioned it casually to a couple of friends/acquaintances because it came up in conversation and they knew I would be planning to TTC at some point in near future. I just made a suggestive comment to my mom about having a baby by next Xmas. Other than that I have purposely not mentioned it to my other close friends and definitely not any coworkers.
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