https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Mon, 06 Apr 2026 10:44:46 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/3-year-old-crying-at-drop-off#post-2854991 Mon, 05 Nov 2018 14:57:01 +0000 Mrs. Lemon-Lime 2854991@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My LO had a string of bad drop offs and it killed me. I really thought something was wrong, but it was all for show. What worked for us was taking him in earlier. LO didn’t like being bombarded with a room full of his friends. We also talked a lot about what each person was going to do- him school, me work. We also developed a drop off routine, which gave both of us an end point. We do this routine after strapping him in the car seat, so driving is another way to reinforce the endpoint or transition. We highfive, fistpump, hug and kiss. I hope your mornings get better!! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/3-year-old-crying-at-drop-off#post-2854958 Mon, 05 Nov 2018 13:24:10 +0000 skinnycow 2854958@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My 2.5 year old struggles with Mondays as well. She loves school and doesn't cry but she tries to convince me to not go to work every Monday. Sounds totally normal! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/3-year-old-crying-at-drop-off#post-2854942 Mon, 05 Nov 2018 12:51:08 +0000 Dahlia 2854942@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@babycanuck: You might want to have your son help make/decorate the calendar. DD helped me, so she feels a bit of ownership of it. We also put in fun things like playdates or holidays to help her get a sense of time. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/3-year-old-crying-at-drop-off#post-2854941 Mon, 05 Nov 2018 12:50:10 +0000 babycanuck 2854941@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Thanks everyone - I'm definitely going to grab the book @Mrs. Turtle: and try the calendar @Dahlia: </p> <p> :heart: :heart: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/3-year-old-crying-at-drop-off#post-2854938 Mon, 05 Nov 2018 12:46:37 +0000 Mrs. Turtle 2854938@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We deal with this still occasionally with O, although it has gotten a lot better. What helped us was talking her through the routine on the way there. "We will sign you in, then take off your jacket, give you a big hug, etc." Also, the book, The Kissing Hand, was really helpful and she still talks about it and asks for hand kisses sometimes. She likes to get a rundown of the next day at bedtime the night before. I think it's a little of what @Dahlia: said, she doesn't like being surprised that it is a school day. So we talk every night at bedtime about "what we goin' to do tomorrow." All of those things help, but she still has teary mornings sometimes, and Mondays are usually the hardest for us, too. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/3-year-old-crying-at-drop-off#post-2854934 Mon, 05 Nov 2018 12:40:07 +0000 KT326 2854934@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We went through this with my oldest at every stage in daycare. He would be fine for a few months and then suddenly cry every day for weeks, then he would be fine again. There would be some mornings the teacher would have to peel him off of me. It sucks, but I think it is completely normal. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/3-year-old-crying-at-drop-off#post-2854933 Mon, 05 Nov 2018 12:39:59 +0000 Dahlia 2854933@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Mondays are always a little hard for my 3 year old. It helped us to make her a little calendar and mark which we school days and which were weekends, and to talk a lot about weekdays and weekends. I think part of the problem was waking up Monday morning and being sort of surprised that she had to go to school. </p> <p>She still cries sometimes though, but I know it stops quickly. Plus if grownups get a case of the Mondays, it makes sense that kids do, too! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/3-year-old-crying-at-drop-off#post-2854923 Mon, 05 Nov 2018 12:13:44 +0000 babycanuck 2854923@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>So over the last few weeks, drop off on Monday's has become full of tears and separation anxiety for my little guy.</p> <p>Is this normal for this age? I always call to check in later in the day and they say he's great; he's never gone through this at this daycare that we put him in this past January. He was in another daycare prior to this one and we all hated it, I expected drop off to be difficult there.</p> <p>It breaks my heart in the mornings to see him so upset when I leave :( I know they give him lots of tender care and they are amazing with him, he's super happy in the day and most days he's telling me all about his days and his friends, but Mondays....I know we spent the weekend together, it's just so unexpected since it began. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/dh-to-do-morning-drop-off-suggestions-please/page/2#post-2837135 Tue, 31 Jul 2018 12:59:41 +0000 Charm54 2837135@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I do all the drop offs and pick ups. Its really helpful to me when DH loads all our stuff in the car before he goes to work. It’s also helpful that he does all of the dog stuff before he leaves so I just have to worry about the kids. I appreciate that on the rare occasions I can’t do the drop off or pick up he rearranges his schedule and makes it work. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/dh-to-do-morning-drop-off-suggestions-please/page/2#post-2837133 Tue, 31 Jul 2018 12:55:06 +0000 Mrs. Carrot 2837133@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@PawPrints: I second this. We switched our schedule at the start of this year so that DH can do drop-off and I would do pickup, and I am really terrible about not over-engineering things, so I tried to really force myself to step out of his process and it's been working just fine. He gets up at the same time I do (about 2 hours before LO is up), so that he has time for a long shower the way he likes it. I leave at 6:30, LO is up around 7:30, and what happens in between and after that is up to him. The only thing I do is put out clothes for LO the night before because DH admits himself that he has no acumen for clothes selection and Lo doesn't care enough to do it herself yet, but otherwise they're on their own. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/dh-to-do-morning-drop-off-suggestions-please/page/2#post-2837118 Tue, 31 Jul 2018 12:05:51 +0000 PawPrints 2837118@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Here's our routine:<br /> We do zero prep the night before.<br /> 6am: I nurse DS while DH showers.<br /> 6:15: DH wakes up DD, gets her cereal ready. DD eats cereal while DH cooks himself eggs and eats them. I put DS in his bouncer in the bathroom with me while I shower.<br /> 6:30-6:45: DS still in his bouncer with me while I dry my hair and get dressed. DH gets DD dressed, brush teeth, does her hair.<br /> 7:00: Everyone ready to go. DH gets in the car with DD and DS and drives them to daycare, I head to the bus stop to go to work. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/dh-to-do-morning-drop-off-suggestions-please/page/2#post-2837113 Tue, 31 Jul 2018 11:57:15 +0000 PawPrints 2837113@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I've only skimmed the other comments so sorry if this is repeating things, but: I strongly feel you should not do a lot to prep for him. Let him handle this himself. He's not a child, and even if he were, it's good parenting to allow a kid to experience failure so they can learn and innovate on their own how to be successful and take responsibility for their own success. In other words, DON'T take it as your own job to do all the pre-packing and putting stuff in the car the night before. After he has done drop-off a few times, he'll figure out on his own that it's easier if he does prep the night before. If you both get into the habit of assuming that you're always going to do all the labor and prep to make parenting as easy as possible for him, then that's the rut you'll be in forever! Let him spread his parenting wings and fly. :) </p> <p>In our house, DH is responsible for dropoff of our older daughter, and will be responsible for both kids once DS starts daycare. I don't do anything to prep for him/them. He has figured out what needs to be done and he gets it done. If he doesn't, then he won't get to work on time. Yes, we've had a few failures here and there (like the time we completely missed out on parent-teacher conferences because he failed to notice the sign-up board) but it all works out, and I am so so happy we've set this precedent so in the next 20 years of parenting we'll have the assumption that we are both equally capable and responsible for all parenting duties. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/dh-to-do-morning-drop-off-suggestions-please/page/2#post-2837056 Tue, 31 Jul 2018 06:53:43 +0000 cake2017 2837056@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Anagram: This is great to read! I know he can do it! Thank you! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/dh-to-do-morning-drop-off-suggestions-please#post-2837008 Mon, 30 Jul 2018 18:46:14 +0000 Anagram 2837008@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@cake2017: I leave for work at 6:45 am, and it's all Dh after that. I pack the kids lunches the night before, but he feeds them breakfast, dresses them, does their hair 50% of the time (if they are up and I have time, I'll do it before I leave) and he packs their backpacks and water bottles. For the last year, then he walked DD1 to school. Next year, he'll have to walk both kids to school and it's at two different schools. </p> <p>So I think he manages it well because he wakes up early-- he's up at 6, whether or not the kids are up. But they do wake up early, around 6-6:15 usually. Basically he wakes up and makes their breakfast and when they wake up he immediately has them potty, brush teeth, and change. Then he leaves them to eat while he takes a quick shower. At this point, I'm usually doing my hair in the bathroom by the living room so I kind of keep an eye for choking purposes but I don't sit with them at all. When he comes out of the shower, he will sit with them till they are done, and this is typically when I'm out the door. So they are eating breakfast by 6:45 am as I leave. I assume they probably finish around 7:15, and then DH let's them play while he dresses and packs their bag. Then he does their hair if he has to and they are out the door by 7:45-8am. Then he'll drop thebkids at before care and walk to the bus. He's got it down to a science. He even makes a real breakfast most mornings--fresh fruit, eggs, toast, pancakes, etc. or in winter oatmeal. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/dh-to-do-morning-drop-off-suggestions-please#post-2836955 Mon, 30 Jul 2018 15:06:43 +0000 cake2017 2836955@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mama Bird: I will be gone before everyone wakes up! Just like now! After everyone’s input i am really believing he’s capable! I always thought that- I just think that comment put me down. Thank you everyone </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/dh-to-do-morning-drop-off-suggestions-please#post-2836954 Mon, 30 Jul 2018 15:05:13 +0000 cake2017 2836954@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Truth Bombs: Another story! I don’t understand why a mother would say that” oh “” you can’t do that. That’s just too much .... I want to speak with DH about this but I am holding off for a better time. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/dh-to-do-morning-drop-off-suggestions-please#post-2836949 Mon, 30 Jul 2018 14:44:36 +0000 Mama Bird 2836949@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I agree it might be hard, but not impossible. Maybe talk to LO in advance about dad dropping him off, and set out clothes the night before. It may also help if you're gone before he wakes up. Especially when my kids were little, they'd behave for DH... but if I was around and not dropping them off they would just completely lose it. And then DH either had to drag them to day care kicking and screaming, or spend at least half an hour calming them down. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/dh-to-do-morning-drop-off-suggestions-please#post-2836945 Mon, 30 Jul 2018 14:39:11 +0000 mdf106 2836945@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think the best way for your husband to build confidence is to figure it out and completely handle mornings himself, it is just a matter of practice. FWIW my husband is much better at handling the kids than I am, largely because he has much more solo time with them. </p> <p>One suggestion for if your husband wants to shower in the morning after the toddler is up is to have them shower together, especially because it seems like they will have plenty of time. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/dh-to-do-morning-drop-off-suggestions-please#post-2836940 Mon, 30 Jul 2018 14:31:46 +0000 Truth Bombs 2836940@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>It sounds like your issue is your MIL, not your morning routine.... </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/dh-to-do-morning-drop-off-suggestions-please#post-2836939 Mon, 30 Jul 2018 14:30:29 +0000 mediagirl 2836939@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Tanjowen: ah yes, I remember that one time I had to make an emergency trip to Target b/c we left w/o shoes and were too far from home to go back... </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/dh-to-do-morning-drop-off-suggestions-please#post-2836938 Mon, 30 Jul 2018 14:30:15 +0000 cake2017 2836938@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@erinbaderin: He’s looking forward to it! He’s nervous I think so I think it will be good to just try to help more with getting him dressed etc. No I will make breakfast and send it with him to the school. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/dh-to-do-morning-drop-off-suggestions-please#post-2836937 Mon, 30 Jul 2018 14:29:16 +0000 Sams Mom 2836937@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Tanjowen: I have definitely used the car seat as a restraint to get shoes on my semi feral toddler. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/dh-to-do-morning-drop-off-suggestions-please#post-2836936 Mon, 30 Jul 2018 14:27:35 +0000 cake2017 2836936@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Tanjowen: Good idea! Thank you </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/dh-to-do-morning-drop-off-suggestions-please#post-2836934 Mon, 30 Jul 2018 14:23:52 +0000 Tanjowen 2836934@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@cake2017: I agree that prepping everything the night before is key! </p> <p>One tip I read on here before was to keep your kid's shoes in the car, right underneath the car seat. That way no battle to put them on and you don't forget them at home, just put them on when buckle them in the car seat! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/dh-to-do-morning-drop-off-suggestions-please#post-2836931 Mon, 30 Jul 2018 14:16:09 +0000 cake2017 2836931@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Adira: DS is home and my mom helps. He does not go to school yet. I do understand what your saying. Sorry for the confusion </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/dh-to-do-morning-drop-off-suggestions-please#post-2836927 Mon, 30 Jul 2018 14:11:27 +0000 cake2017 2836927@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrsbells: Yes! Everything will be laid out for them both(well DH’s lunch not his outfits haha). DH asked for this so it will help go smoothly. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/dh-to-do-morning-drop-off-suggestions-please#post-2836925 Mon, 30 Jul 2018 14:08:11 +0000 cake2017 2836925@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@LemonJack: I agree 100% and I am tired of hearing this from his family. MIL did everything and I was looked down when I said I am going to work (another post for another day) so when we shared this yesterday we received this negative response. DH wants to help and wants to do drop off so he can have more time with DS. His work schedule is hectic and this will allow for some time! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/dh-to-do-morning-drop-off-suggestions-please#post-2836921 Mon, 30 Jul 2018 14:06:03 +0000 cake2017 2836921@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Pickle: These are our exact reasons too. If DH drops off he can get there at 8/815am instead of 630am and I can get him earlier in the afternoon. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/dh-to-do-morning-drop-off-suggestions-please#post-2836919 Mon, 30 Jul 2018 14:03:46 +0000 cake2017 2836919@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@mediagirl: I agree with you! That is what my MIL stated and I snapped back saying he’s more than capable! He may have to wake him up but DS usually gets up on his own. @Sams Mom: I agree with you too! My MIL made those statements. </p> <p>Everything will be prepared for each day! I do this currently and it works well for everyone </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/dh-to-do-morning-drop-off-suggestions-please#post-2836903 Mon, 30 Jul 2018 13:25:13 +0000 LemonJack 2836903@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>It bothers me when people (like your MIL) act like dads aren’t capable. Because of our schedules, DH has always done the morning routine and drop off, and people have definitely made comments before about how lucky I am that he helps out. Uh, no. He’s just as much a parent as me. The double standard is aggravating.</p> <p>Anyway, to make mornings easier on all of us, we do as much the night before as possible (pack bags, lay out clothes, etc). It’s easiest if DH gets ready before our girls are up, but if he doesn’t, our younger DD (your son’s age) just plays in the bathroom with him while he gets ready. He gets both girls a quick breakfast (eggs, toast, etc), and when they’re done he gets DD2 dressed while DD1 (4) gets herself dressed. They brush their teeth right before they walk out the door.</p> <p>I leave soon after the girls get up, so the only thing I help with is doing our older daughter’s hair. Otherwise it’s the daddy show.</p> <p>I know mornings are a bit hectic, but he’s told me he likes having this time with them. When he is gone and I have to do the morning routine, my older DD doesn’t like it as she’s used to having daddy there. </p>