https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Thu, 09 Apr 2026 01:18:36 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/induction-for-severe-anxietydepression-and-suicidal-thoughts/page/2#post-2911077 Tue, 03 Mar 2020 12:03:50 +0000 yellowbeach 2911077@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@CatchAFallingStar: I'm so glad you've found a program that's helping some and giving you even just a little relief. Day by day, you can do this. Ask for help as you have been doing. Everyone is here for you. :heart: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/induction-for-severe-anxietydepression-and-suicidal-thoughts/page/2#post-2911044 Sun, 01 Mar 2020 23:27:45 +0000 ALV91711 2911044@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@CatchAFallingStar: Glad to hear things are getting better. Progress is always good. In hope things continue to get better and remember we are all here for you. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/induction-for-severe-anxietydepression-and-suicidal-thoughts/page/2#post-2911037 Sun, 01 Mar 2020 22:38:29 +0000 CatchAFallingStar 2911037@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@ALV91711: thank you so much for checking in... I’ve been doing a little better. I’m in an intensive outpatient program 3 days a week. I think it’s helping. I’m still isolating a lot and staying in bed when I shouldn’t. But, I haven’t been having suicidal thoughts. I can’t wait to feel back to normal again. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/induction-for-severe-anxietydepression-and-suicidal-thoughts/page/2#post-2911012 Sat, 29 Feb 2020 16:03:13 +0000 ALV91711 2911012@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@CatchAFallingStar: was thinking of you. Just wanted to pop in and check how you are doing? Hope everything is ok. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/induction-for-severe-anxietydepression-and-suicidal-thoughts/page/2#post-2910166 Thu, 13 Feb 2020 16:33:49 +0000 yellowbeach 2910166@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@CatchAFallingStar: I'm sorry that I am just now seeing this thread as I've been overseas for 2 weeks. But as an ER doctor, I just wanted to echo others and tell you that YOU are the reason I go to work every day. To help people like you who are in a tough place, struggling and feeling like they have few options and little support. Going to the ER for these feelings is absolutely appropriate and not an overreaction. Unlike an OB, as ER doc can be a quarterback to lead multiple team members (Psychiatry, OB) into the mix and formulate a plan that's safe for you and helps maintain a safe pregnancy. There are MANY options. I see at least 2-3 patients a month who are pregnant and struggling with severe mental health issues and suicidality. We want to help you, so please take that first step. :heart: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/umbilical-hernia-pain-management#post-2909604 Tue, 04 Feb 2020 13:43:12 +0000 Sams Mom 2909604@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm also growing an umbilical hernia at 36 weeks. I work in a general surgery office and my desk mate's surgeon is fixing mine at 4 weeks pp. Mine started hurting when I had a cough, even if I tried holding it in. He told me to fold up some 4x4 gauze poke the hernia in and tape over it. It's not ideal, but he won't touch it until I'm a month out. It helped some, but now that I've got over the cough it only hurts when she abuses it from the inside. </p> [attach=8928/20/q56xc1.600x450.IMG_20200204_123946.jpg] https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/35-weeks-pregnant-amp-hosting-unexpected-out-of-town-guests#post-2909580 Tue, 04 Feb 2020 09:21:02 +0000 graceandjoy 2909580@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I agree with others that said the fundamental problem is that it is NOT ok to have overnight guests happen without consulting each other first. We don’t even have regular company before ok-ing with each other! </p> <p>I think at this point you just have to get him on board to make things as easy as possible for you. Dude, I just had my 3rd at 36+4 so he needs to understand that this is almost the end and there cannot be expectations on you. And then circle back to talk about how to properly communicate and come to agreements on these situations in the future. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/umbilical-hernia-pain-management#post-2909573 Tue, 04 Feb 2020 08:48:55 +0000 Becky 2909573@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Any tips for managing umbilical hernia pain during pregnancy? My hernia isn’t very big so I want to wait to repair it but I’m starting to get discomfort. A belly band seems to help but also makes me nauseous. I’m not sure if reduced activity is recommended so feedback would be great. I’m gaining weight faster than I’d like with this pregnancy so don’t want to back off activity unless it will help (I did stop running). </p> <p>Tips are highly appreciated! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/35-weeks-pregnant-amp-hosting-unexpected-out-of-town-guests#post-2909572 Tue, 04 Feb 2020 08:28:17 +0000 Ajsmommy 2909572@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I had to come back to comment. This sounds so much like something DH would have done to me... he is an a$$ when it comes to pregnant woman. Granted I had easy pregnancies but... but he seriously doesn't think pregnant woman need extra rest or to take it easy and thinks they can just function as usual. So he would have totally thought at 35 wks i could watch 4 kids and it would have been no big deal... Thank goodness that didn't happen.. </p> <p>Anyway, I wanted to echo what PP's said, I am sorry you have to deal with visitors so late in the pregnancy when all you want to do is focus on nesting and you and yours.. I would also find a way or ways to be out gone.. leave the kids to them :) I like the idea of a prenatal massage. </p> <p>Good luck. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/35-weeks-pregnant-amp-hosting-unexpected-out-of-town-guests#post-2909566 Tue, 04 Feb 2020 04:57:20 +0000 Nutella 2909566@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>OMG I could not leave this one without commenting: while your BIL sounds like a gem of houseguest to begin with (who brings a vomiting child to a house with a newborn :bummed: ), I can just imagine this scenario with a DH being too scared to tell his heavily pregnant wife that there will be two extra kids to watch - buttt don’t be afraid to use the late pregnancy card and bow out of all activities that stress you out! You don’t need that right now and bringing on early labour sounds not great either. It has happened twice with me and I like reminding people to take it easy in those final weeks!</p> <p>I echo the ideas above take yourself out and let your DH do the hard yards - sorry but if he could take on this commitment he can see it through! I struggle at the best of times with ILs who are insensitive and blind to others’ needs at times, but during pregnancy my fuse is extra short....you sound more patient than me but make sure you look after yourself and that new baby coming along (so exciting btw, congrats :heart: )</p> <p>Good luck!!! And enjoy your new baby when they do arrive :heart: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/35-weeks-pregnant-amp-hosting-unexpected-out-of-town-guests#post-2909565 Tue, 04 Feb 2020 03:25:23 +0000 SugarplumsMom 2909565@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Shantuck: Please do this! Seriously. Just say out loud all the aches and pains you normally keep in your head ... followed by "it would really make me feel a tiny bit better if ..." </p> <p>There will be two able-bodied adults at your home that day. Please, please take advantage of it without any guilt! :heart: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/35-weeks-pregnant-amp-hosting-unexpected-out-of-town-guests#post-2909543 Mon, 03 Feb 2020 19:51:38 +0000 Shantuck 2909543@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@SugarplumsMom: I would except they are going to be busy watching all 4 kids while I’m getting a prenatal massage! :wink: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/35-weeks-pregnant-amp-hosting-unexpected-out-of-town-guests#post-2909541 Mon, 03 Feb 2020 18:47:22 +0000 Mama Bird 2909541@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@SugarplumsMom: ooooh, that's a good idea! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/35-weeks-pregnant-amp-hosting-unexpected-out-of-town-guests#post-2909535 Mon, 03 Feb 2020 16:53:30 +0000 SugarplumsMom 2909535@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Would it be possible for you to pretend that you're the guest of honor? By pretend, I mean act like you are ... truly? Get them to finish up the nursery and run errands you've been meaning to do. Have them pick up something you've been craving ... cook for you even. I mean if you bust out a rough itinerary, they won't flat out refuse now, will they? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/35-weeks-pregnant-amp-hosting-unexpected-out-of-town-guests#post-2909525 Mon, 03 Feb 2020 15:38:44 +0000 MrsSCB 2909525@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>It sounds like you have a good reason for not liking your BIL, and not liking someone is a perfectly valid reason for not wanting them to visit. Add in all the other factors and....yeah. I'd be livid. I agree with others that I'd try to hire a babysitter for the time your BIL and husband will be out. Otherwise, entertaining the kids will be on them. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/35-weeks-pregnant-amp-hosting-unexpected-out-of-town-guests#post-2909515 Mon, 03 Feb 2020 14:52:40 +0000 Anagram 2909515@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Shantuck: definitely take back where you told your husband you would watch the kids while they go play trivia. You can find a girlfriend and go play trivia while they watch all the kids, or you can cancel the trivia altogether. I mean this in the gentlest way possible—-don’t be a doormat. </p> <p>The main thing is, you and your husband need to communicate. And none of this is BIls fault really, this is all on your husband. So he needs to do the work—hire a cleaner, arrange for the food. And you have to actually step away and let him sink or swim. Don’t do things like volunteering to watch the kids if you are going to feel resentful over it, you know? </p> <p>I run into this issue with my husband (and by the way, sometimes he runs into it with me!), where one of us kind of commits to a situation that really stretches us too far. We literally just ran into it this last weekend. We had a blow out (which is pretty rare for us!) but we had the blow up, I stated my feelings and my requirements for the situation, and we worked it out in the end. Very similarly to your situation, my husband over committed us for this last weekend, for the whole weekend, after an entire week where everyone but me had the flu and I slept very little, took care of the sick kids for 4 consecutive days because DH was also sick, our house and normal life stuff like laundry and grocery shopping fell by the wayside, and when finally we arrived at the weekend and my only desire was to clean up our house, rest a little, stock up on food, and do the mountain of laundry, suddenly I find out DH has committed to events both Saturday and Sunday, for several (like 5 hours each event) hours, and I was like—-no,this just isn’t going to work for me.</p> <p>I did realize he was in a tough spot having already committed, so I gave him options—he could wake up super early both days to finish all the chores by himself before the kids were up (meaning, I was not going to wake up early to help him, as it was him that committed to these events), or he could get on the phone and call every cleaning service in town and send our laundry out, and he would do the mental labor of making all the calls and doing all the arranging. Or he could call the friends and cancel 1 or both days of events. </p> <p>But I knew I didn’t have it in me to make through an entire hell week, and then not have a minute of downtime over the weekend. </p> <p>And guess what—DH did it. He did ALL the laundry, and hung it all up and put it away. He did all the vacuuming and cleaning the kitchen and cleaning our room and his bathroom. </p> <p>I did clean the kids bathroom. </p> <p>I still felt worn out attending the 2 events he committed us to, but I felt more willing to make that happen for him when he worked so hard making my requirements happen for me. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/35-weeks-pregnant-amp-hosting-unexpected-out-of-town-guests#post-2909513 Mon, 03 Feb 2020 14:39:24 +0000 bhbee 2909513@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Yeah nothing new to say but this is ridiculous. The end of pregnancy #3 is so awful - I could barely handle my own kids. And I got shingles at 38w pregnant likely due to stress on my system ... do whatever you can to put it all on him and rest yourself! Easier said than done I know ... but it’s so important to take care of yourself. Good luck!!! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/35-weeks-pregnant-amp-hosting-unexpected-out-of-town-guests#post-2909511 Mon, 03 Feb 2020 14:08:48 +0000 poppygirl15 2909511@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Agree you should bow out of trivia night. The school will understand. And, I’d give your DH the phone number of a babysitter. He and BIL should be planning on doing kid-friendly activities with their kiddos and if they want some bro time, they should hire someone to do it for you. GL! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/35-weeks-pregnant-amp-hosting-unexpected-out-of-town-guests#post-2909509 Mon, 03 Feb 2020 13:36:44 +0000 yerpie110 2909509@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Did your husband think you wouldn't notice an additional child walk through your doors??? Husbands are funny. Have him do all the cooking and cleaning, and you go on a mom-cation! Even if that means staying locked inside your bedroom all day. Not acceptable on his part! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/35-weeks-pregnant-amp-hosting-unexpected-out-of-town-guests#post-2909503 Mon, 03 Feb 2020 11:30:13 +0000 LemonJack 2909503@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>You’re not overreacting. Like others have said, I would cancel out of the trivia night. It’s not acceptable for your husband to spring an extra kid on you. I was so incredibly exhausted at 35 weeks with my third. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/35-weeks-pregnant-amp-hosting-unexpected-out-of-town-guests#post-2909502 Mon, 03 Feb 2020 11:18:52 +0000 Baby Boy Mom 2909502@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Oh boy, that's not cool at all of your DH! Agree with PP, cancel the school event! Also let your DH know that he's in charge of food- ordering delivery, pickup whatever, since that's usually the most annoying part of hosting. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/35-weeks-pregnant-amp-hosting-unexpected-out-of-town-guests#post-2909501 Mon, 03 Feb 2020 11:02:20 +0000 ElbieKay 2909501@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Your husband is being a jerk.</p> <p>I think you should send him and his brother and those kids somewhere other than your house. Stay home with your kids and hire a babysitter or mother's helper so you can have some breaks. Why should he kick you out of your own home?</p> <p>Also, you can quit the school event. Tell them now that you won't make it to the trivia night. They can find a new volunteer. Don't be a martyr. There will be other school events. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/35-weeks-pregnant-amp-hosting-unexpected-out-of-town-guests#post-2909500 Mon, 03 Feb 2020 10:56:03 +0000 Shantuck 2909500@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@nwm: SIL did have a new baby in July who (to my knowledge) is not coming... but yeah, I imagine this ends up being a nice and easy weekend for her at home with just one kid instead of 3. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/35-weeks-pregnant-amp-hosting-unexpected-out-of-town-guests#post-2909499 Mon, 03 Feb 2020 10:53:54 +0000 nwm 2909499@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Also not for nothing, but is SIL just chilling at home kid free for this weekend while you are apparently expected to be caring for four children while super pregnant? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/35-weeks-pregnant-amp-hosting-unexpected-out-of-town-guests#post-2909498 Mon, 03 Feb 2020 10:52:13 +0000 nwm 2909498@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I was at "hard no" just reading the title of your post. Definitely an opportunity for you to just head to a hotel/friend's house/whatever you want to do for as much of the weekend as you want. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/35-weeks-pregnant-amp-hosting-unexpected-out-of-town-guests#post-2909497 Mon, 03 Feb 2020 10:50:14 +0000 Mama Bird 2909497@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Ok, that's really sneaky and insensitive and not cool. If your husband can't get BIL to go into a hotel, I second everyone who suggests you take a mini vacation on those days. If your husband doesn't get a taste of the joys of hosting while working and caring for kids (which he assumes is going to be your job), he'll just keep doing this. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/35-weeks-pregnant-amp-hosting-unexpected-out-of-town-guests#post-2909495 Mon, 03 Feb 2020 10:40:32 +0000 PawPrints 2909495@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I don't care what the circumstances are, no spouse ever gets to invite weekend guests without approval from the other spouse. Your dude has lost his mind. Tell them to have fun and go check into a really nice hotel by yourself for the weekend. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/35-weeks-pregnant-amp-hosting-unexpected-out-of-town-guests#post-2909494 Mon, 03 Feb 2020 10:39:53 +0000 ALV91711 2909494@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I wouldn’t be doing any hosting duties! Tell DH he is in charge of entertaining and child minding while you rest. Go out, get a pedicure and enjoy some quiet time. </p> <p>FWIW we had weekend company when I was 36 weeks with DS2. I did know they were coming but was t super excited. But they had a daughter the same age as DS1, so that kept him busy and we either ordered in or DH cooked. I just took it easy and relaxed. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/35-weeks-pregnant-amp-hosting-unexpected-out-of-town-guests#post-2909493 Mon, 03 Feb 2020 10:21:40 +0000 Shantuck 2909493@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@annem1990: My husband thinks that I don't want BIL to visit solely because I don't like him. This stems from a visit 3 years ago when we hosted DH's entire family from out of town over Christmas for 5 days so they could all meet our newborn baby. BIL and SIL brought a vomiting child into the house, which turned out to be the norovirus. 8 out of 11 people we were hosting ended up really ill - one of them being our 8 week old newborn. They ended up deciding to cut their trip a day short and left at 5 a.m. without even saying goodbye/thank you/sorry. So yeah... hard to get myself excited for another opportunity to host them. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/35-weeks-pregnant-amp-hosting-unexpected-out-of-town-guests#post-2909491 Mon, 03 Feb 2020 10:05:53 +0000 DesertDreams88 2909491@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Yeah I'd definitely be pissed off and very tempted to take a "mommy-cation" at some inexpensive nearby hotel that weekend. Like.... I actually would probably do that. </p>