https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Tue, 21 Apr 2026 23:25:11 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/maternity-leave-policy-at-a-small-business#post-2919283 Mon, 28 Sep 2020 11:13:19 +0000 Clementine12 2919283@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>What do you think is a fair maternity leave policy for a small business? </p> <p>Living in the US - I am filling out a survey for work and there is a question about benefits. I want to say that a more defined and reasonable maternity leave policy is desirable but if questioned I want to be able to give specific ideas.</p> <p>Business has 20 employees - I was the first to have a baby in years with my first but now 3 of us have young kids (all women) and there are 2 men who might have kids while working here. With my first leave, I asked for a few things (working from home when back to work mostly) and it ended up feeling like we were drafting policy for this as I went through it.</p> <p>They pay for STD which covers 60ish% of a paycheck for 6 (really 4) or 8 (really 6) weeks depending on the birth. They continue to cover medical insurance costs during maternity leave. Other than that, sick leave and vacation leave can be used (we accrue sick leave 1 week a year and get up to 3 weeks vacation that does not roll over).</p> <p>For example, I had LO2 in December. I took 12 weeks off and was paid through 10 weeks, some partial through STD and some in full through vacation and sick leave. I accrue leave on my date of hire which is in January, so I have no vacation or sick leave until January again. As a "benefit" we are able to work from home 1 day/week for the first 2 years (before COVID so this is a bit of a joke now).</p> <p>What do you think is fair? Is it unreasonable to want more out of the business? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/when-did-you-tell-work-about-your-pregnancy#post-2859078 Thu, 29 Nov 2018 14:16:47 +0000 skinnycow 2859078@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>With my first pregnancy I told work around 15 weeks and mostly waited that long due to fear of discrimination.</p> <p>This pregnancy I told my boss at 10 weeks due to having a lot of appointments and couple absences when not feeling well. I think I will share with others at work after my 12 week appointment if all goes well because I'm starting to show.</p> <p>Out of curiousity - when did everyone else tell work? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/favorite-quiet-breast-pump#post-2851524 Tue, 16 Oct 2018 11:13:12 +0000 mediagirl 2851524@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We have paper thin walls at our office and I'd like to get a breast pump that can't be heard by my neighbors with my door shut. Any suggestions for quiet breast pumps?</p> <p>I get a free PISA from my insurance but if I remember correctly from 6 years ago, that thing was pretty loud. </p> <p>It also has to be able to work really well - I'll be going back to work at 12 weeks and plan to pump for 12 months. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/pregnancy-timing-and-grant-work#post-2833650 Thu, 12 Jul 2018 14:42:04 +0000 Becky 2833650@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>DH would like another baby, and I’m trying to figure out the timing in terms of work (I’m not sold on the idea). I am on a 2 year grant and will hopefully get another 1-2 year grant after this one. I would like to have a June-September baby, but the grants typically wrap up in September or December so I could miss the last few months of delivery and possibly reporting. I think the best timing would be mid-late June in terms of the programming end. In terms of our family dynamic I think next year would be the best year to go for it, but it would be year 2 of a 2 year grant and it’s a new position for me and a new grant for my employer (I’ve been with the employer for 3 years and have had one baby while with them). Also I’m pretty much responsible for all reporting and programming for these grants. Anyone have a similar type of job (ongoing grants) and have feedback or advice? I’m totally open to someone saying it would be selfish/a bad idea. I would also consider taking a shorter leave (maybe 8-10 weeks) and coming back to work part time for a few months. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/going-on-maternity-leave-when-busy-at-work#post-2816399 Sun, 15 Apr 2018 10:09:59 +0000 agold 2816399@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Did anyone leave on their maternity leave when busy at work or with some work unfinished? I'm just about 37 weeks and my work is so insanely busy right now. Its impossible for me to get ahead because new work is popping up each day. I'm working ridiculous hours. I plan to work until about 38.5 weeks. I'll be leaving in the middle of something and am just about to turn in a crap work product because I just about hit a wall over this weekend. </p> <p>I'm just curious if anyone else dealt with leaving on maternity leave during a bust work time. I think I'm just looking for moral support! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/any-regrets-taking-time-off-before-due-date#post-2784540 Mon, 06 Nov 2017 14:33:30 +0000 Meowkers 2784540@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Does anyone regret taking the permitted 4 weeks disability leave prior to their due date?</p> <p> I didn't take any time off before my due date with my first. However, this second pregnancy is kicking my behind. I'm exhausted all the time and barely functioning by the end of the day.....and I'm only 6 months along. Strongly considering taking 4 weeks off before hand but feel guilty about our family loosing money while I do.......nothing at home. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/stressed-and-in-need-of-rest#post-2774393 Wed, 20 Sep 2017 10:26:17 +0000 CC Mommy 2774393@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I've heard of women who are used to exercising and then when they get pregnant they are discouraged by how much less they can endure--I have also heard, however, about this second trimester energy burst that should be kicking in right about now. </p> <p>We all have things that we are juggling in life, whether you have toddlers, work, school or family obligations--or in my case three out of four. Last Wednesday, I began to realize that I could not endure the hectic 12-16 hour days of running from point A to point B to point C and still make sure healthy food is packed and prepped for me and my husband everyday. I thought if I took some time to relax over the weekend (Queue: Girls Night In :happy: ) that would suffice, but alas, here we are again three days into the week and I had to call in sick because for the first time in my pregnancy my crazy schedule made me physically ill yesterday and I woke up feeling awful. Feeling better (but, fragile) at the moment and I really don't know what to do. </p> <p>My husband tells me not to stress out about food (but, when he's supposed to pick something up for dinner, he forgets and asks me "What's for dinner?") then he says don't worry about grades in your last semester, but I have to pass my comprehensive exams because my next opportunity to take them will be one month into motherhood. I can't cut back on hours at work, because of insurance and honestly, I am at a loss. </p> <p>How do you all do it? My body keeps telling me to slow down and my mother keeps telling me "Don't push yourself too hard, when you are pushing yourself, you are pushing that baby," but what other option do I have?? Do I just call in sick to work every Wednesday to recuperate from my failed attempt to juggle life? </p> <p>Any advice or experiences would be greatly appreciated! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/quit-job-pregnant-feeling-worthless#post-2773765 Sun, 17 Sep 2017 22:51:27 +0000 Gigglefits 2773765@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Hello, this is my first time here.</p> <p>My name is Autumn, I am 34. I had to quit my job that i had for twelve years due to insensitivity from the newly transfered manager. I was diagnosed with severe anxiety and depression by my doctor and immediately informed the manager of the diagnosis. To my surprise she treated it as if the condition doesn't exist and continued to push my mental state to the limit. April eighth was the day i was pushed overboard, resulting in my resignation.</p> <p>I am now six months pregnant. I am happy and scared at the same time. This is my first baby. I live with my fiance who's the daddy to be. Often times though i wonder if i did the right thing. I feel worthless and lazy. My depression and anxiety will not let go of me. I try to stay calm for my sake and more importantly the babies. It just seems like its getting too much to bare, i just don't know what to do. Finding work has been fruitless. My fiance though tells me not to worry about work just the baby. I love him so much, but i still feel terrible for not working. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/creating-a-paternal-leave-policy#post-2630894 Mon, 03 Oct 2016 10:51:32 +0000 tramdoof 2630894@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Hi! </p> <p>I work for a mid-size startup (non-tech) with a young professional workforce in a major urban city. Despite being a a year old we have little in terms of paternal leave policy largley because there aren't a lot of people in the office around the child bearing stage of life. We do have formal guidlines around the length of leave (9 weeks paid, with the option to use an annual allowance of 2 weeks vacaction, 1 week sick time for a total of 12 weeks paid for the primary care giver and 2 weeks paid for the secondary care giver). I am (a non-HR person) in charge of creating more specific guidlines and benefits for parental leave. I was hoping to crowd source some best practices around parental leave. If you had a good experience what helped and what should we avoid? Obviously more leave is something to push for, but I am namely looking for suggestions outside of just increasing paid time off. Even little things. Anything anecdotal helps as well! </p> <p>Thanks! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/can-public-agencies-legally-discriminate-against-hiring-consultants-due-to-pregnancy#post-2617396 Wed, 07 Sep 2016 17:27:55 +0000 Amorini 2617396@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>AKA, the life and times of the pregnant career woman... chapter 3!</p> <p>My field is male-dominated. I led an interview today for a public project we were shortlisted for. During the Q&amp;A, the public agency project manager said, "I can't help but notice your condition." He proceeded to ask how my position on the project would be covered during my maternity leave. The purchasing agent chimed in, "I was going to ask that, too." The only other woman in the room, a public agency person, said twice, "You can't ask that." She apologized to me from across the room. But the other two insisted. We handled it professionally on our end and moved on, but were fuming about it afterwards.</p> <p>Employers can't ask questions about such things in interviews to potential employees, but can public purchasing offices? PDA and FMLA laws protect employees from employers but what about federal, state, county or city purchasing departments who are hiring and vetting and interviewing consultants? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/advice-please-start-new-job-at-20-weeks#post-2559050 Mon, 30 May 2016 09:41:55 +0000 daniellealys 2559050@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Hi friends<br /> I have landed my dream job! I won't bore you with the details but I'm very excited. I start in 3 weeks..i will be 20 weeks. I was 16 weeks when I interviewed and looked very pregnant. But interviewed with all men.. So they probably didn't notice. I'm leaving a great job to take this job. I'm concerned with maternity leave. they do 6 weeks under basic std and the rest is supplemental which I won't qualify for. :( My ask to them is that I can take the additional 6 weeks unpaid. So, should I tell them ASAP I'm expecting? Should I wait until I'm officially hired - i have just accepted at this point. Tell my manager now? Tell my hr contact now? I'm dying to know the details and if they will allow the extra unpaid leave?! But what's the best way to go about it? Also, I'm not protected under FMLA.., so I could possibly be taking a huge risk here. FYI..i live in Illinois, US and work in not for profit healthcare. M not sure if hr or my manager makes this decision?? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/job-offer-at-27weeks-pregnant#post-2565506 Fri, 10 Jun 2016 23:06:09 +0000 RVCM2016 2565506@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Hi, i work as an accounting clerk for a company where i dont see a future with and is a far commute from home, which is killing me slowly every day.<br /> I have been applying for jobs for a few months now, had a few interviews but had no luck with getting hired.<br /> Recently i heard of a government contractor job that was looking to hire close to my home and needed to fill the position as soon as possible.<br /> So i applied, i got called right away, interviewed the following day. I never mentioned my being pregnant, it never came up and i didnt hide it.<br /> So today i received an offer letter and they want me to star as soon as the 20th, all contingent on drug test, etc.<br /> I am super excited and happy, but nervous that i will start work and will have to take time off 2 months later. My fear is that i will start working and will be let go due to my pregnancy.<br /> So im not sure if to accept the offer first, take the drug test, and wait until they say im ok to work before mentioning my pregnancy, or should i bring it up before i accept?<br /> This is a great opportunity ive been looking for forever, but i dont want to be dishonest and basically end up screwing myself.<br /> Any tips and advice would b greatly appreciated. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/ontario-canada-maternitypregnancy-and-parental-leave#post-2531071 Thu, 21 Apr 2016 14:03:09 +0000 stiletto_mom 2531071@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I understand that I can get up to 17 weeks of maternity/pregnancy leave (up to 8 weeks of those paid, I think) before my due date. Then we get 35 weeks of parental leave that can be taken by one parent or split between the two.</p> <p>I also get that I maybe eligible for EI during parental leave.</p> <p>My question is, when baby is born, is DH entitled to time off work at all? Or is he expected to go back to work the following day? </p> <p>How did you all do it? Did your SO take a few emergency days or sick days? SO's work requires him to sign for vacation weeks the year prior, so it's not flexible for him to switch it around (especially no knowing when baby will be here).</p> <p>How many days did your SO take off immediately following the birth? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/pregnancy-and-discrimination-in-the-workplace#post-2499698 Fri, 18 Mar 2016 13:09:18 +0000 hb3233 2499698@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I've been somewhat dismayed in interacting with women from my profession (which is extremely male-dominated) and with my friends from college at the number of women who feel like pregnancy negatively impacted their careers, because they could no longer fit in as "one of the guys", or they were mommy tracked, or even older women (who in their day really could not have kids and stay in the profession) disapproved of their choices. I'm not talking about pregnancy/parenthood actually affecting one's ability to do one's job, or changing priorities, but rather it changing people's perception of ability due to (potentially sub-conscious) gender stereotypes. </p> <p>I know HB is not a representative sample of the world's workforce, but I'm curious how many of us have experienced this, or suspect we have. I'd really like it to be rare, but not sure that people I interact with IRL give me reason to be optimistic. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/anyone-else-dragging-at-work#post-2475826 Fri, 26 Feb 2016 09:34:50 +0000 MrsLilybugg 2475826@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm 36 weeks and sleep is so hard to come by! Every position hurts, shifting sides in bed hurts, it's hard to stay asleep. Gah. I've definitely never been a morning person (anyone that is too peppy and hyper and tries to talk to me about how they just ran a marathon in the morning gets a mental slap from me), but I'm no longer an "afternoon person" either. LEAVE ME ALONE! </p> <p>Obviously I am professional for work meetings, etc. But I just don't have it in me anymore for the "social" aspect. In particular, there is a co-worker that I have named my "Work Toddler". Wants to talk all the time. About stupid things. All the time. The worst is at the end of the day when I'm so drained. Go away. I'm too tired to care about what you're saying. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-you-work-full-time-throughout-your-pregnancy#post-2411162 Wed, 06 Jan 2016 11:58:05 +0000 Autumnmama79 2411162@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Every time someone asks and I tell them, "yes, I'm still working full time", they look/sound horrified at the thought!! I'm planning on going off one full month before my due date but until then, full time it is. There are days when it certainly sucks big time (and the first trimester was very challenging), but its not THAT bad. </p> <p>ETA: I am a teacher, so mostly on my feet all day. </p> <p>Did you work full-time throughout your pregnancy? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/teacher-bees-how-did-you-tell-your-staff#post-2373219 Mon, 30 Nov 2015 14:38:09 +0000 Autumnmama79 2373219@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm not sure how to do this and I'm hoping for some ideas! I've withheld telling for a long time bc we had two losses this past year and I've really wanted to keep this close to my heart. Also, I'm not close with anyone on staff and I'm a private person in general.</p> <p>However, people are giving me knowing glances and smiles and the bump is showing and I think its fairly obvious... I feel so awkward telling people and I'm not sure how to do this! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/baby-boom-at-work#post-2330704 Thu, 22 Oct 2015 17:59:28 +0000 Mrs. Lemon-Lime 2330704@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>One of my "team" members is pregnant with #2, and DH has two co workers that are pregnant with their first. We are all due within 6 weeks of each of other. I'm the last one.</p> <p>Are you part of a baby boom IRL? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/when-will-did-you-tell-work-ftm#post-2300775 Thu, 24 Sep 2015 11:54:07 +0000 Mrs. Lemon-Lime 2300775@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I confided in two close co-workers already that both new about my loss last year that I'm expecting. These people are friends outside of work. </p> <p>As for telling my boss and alerting HR, I'm still a little unsure of when. I actually would be able to share the news in person at 11w 4d with him and everyone on my team for that matter. Or I could wait until 12 weeks or even 13 weeks and share the news over the phone with just him. More of my customers know that I'm pregnant and for the time being nothing has gotten back to work. For now, when I tell people it's very early and that I haven't announced to work they seem understanding. Although that would be a horrible way for him to find out. As long as the fetus is fine, I don't really see any drawbacks to sharing now or later. </p> <p>When did you tell work and how did you decide? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/wwyd-telling-work#post-2157850 Mon, 27 Apr 2015 07:39:44 +0000 Mrs. Taco 2157850@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm currently just over 6 weeks but I am trying to figure out when to tell work that I am pregnant. I am a HS teacher and for this pregnancy I will be out from Christmas break until the beginning of April when state testing begins....essentially I am missing one of the most important parts of the year (yeah I know, not the best timing!). </p> <p>In HS, there are more "important" years when it comes to state testing, for example, in 12th grade you don't even have a final but in 10th grade you MUST pass the exam to graduate. I don't want to be assigned to 10th grade next year (which I teach classes of this year) because I feel like it is a big disservice to my students. </p> <p>Right now administration is deciding who will teach what so I am tempted to let them know. That way, they can make the decision if they still want me to teach the "high stakes" courses....BUT it is still so early in my pregnancy. I already got my letter of intent for next year so my employment is secure, this is a matter of trying to do what is best for my school and students. </p> <p>So, would you tell your boss/administration even though it is so early? </p> <p>(Last time I waited until 12 weeks but if I wait that long, school will already be over!) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/work-question#post-2144110 Tue, 14 Apr 2015 19:34:27 +0000 Swoggette 2144110@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Hey there ladies! Curious of those of you who may have found out you were pregnant around the time you started a new job/accepted a promotion. DH and I are actively trying and I have accepted a promotion. When did you let work know once you were successfully pregnant? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/anyones-dr-refuse-to-pull-them-from-work#post-2015450 Thu, 08 Jan 2015 15:32:43 +0000 Mrs. Tricycle 2015450@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>So my due date's this weekend, and I asked to be pulled from work beginning next Monday with a doctor's note. My doctor has said no, as I'm perfectly healthy, and I need to continue working until I deliver, even if it is past my due date. Simply being tired and uncomfortable doesn't count as medical justification to stop working. </p> <p>Of course, she's out of the office today, so I just spoke with the nurse, who said she'd be too busy at the hospital tomorrow delivering babies, and I'd have to wait until Monday to speak with her. Grr.</p> <p>Has anyone else's doctor refused to pull them from work, even once they're past their due date? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/telling-your-boss#post-1845169 Tue, 02 Sep 2014 11:26:20 +0000 poprocks7911 1845169@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>When did you tell your boss that you were expecting? Any surprises from their reaction? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/teacher-bees-when-did-your-students-figure-it-out#post-2005231 Thu, 01 Jan 2015 12:59:39 +0000 simplyfelicity 2005231@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Just curious about other teachers' experience with students asking if you were pregnant. Did you hide it for a while, just tell your class to get it over with, or say nothing at all? I going back to work at nearly 15 weeks and now have a slight bump, can't figure out if I want to embrace it or hide it, especially since my next ultrasound will be the Friday we get back and haven't seen babe since 9 weeks.<br /> Anyway, what was your experience with your students figuring out you were pregnant? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/announcing-to-boss-and-coworkers#post-1985585 Mon, 15 Dec 2014 17:25:16 +0000 dolphin 1985585@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Last pregnancy I told my boss pretty early on because she had noticed I was looking awful and asked if everything was okay. I announced to my coworkers a few weeks later. This time I was planning to tell my boss and coworkers at the same time at our holiday dinner (since it will be obvious when I don't order a drink). There's only 5 of us at dinner. But now I'm thinking, wait, should I tell my boss privately first before dinner? Does it matter? What would you do? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/worried-that-i-cant-handle-business-trip-at-9-weeks-tell-boss#post-1918739 Tue, 28 Oct 2014 08:05:29 +0000 Corduroy 1918739@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I have an upcoming business trip in two weeks that I've been dreading. It falls at 9 weeks. It's two days of travel (5 hour flights and three hours of driving) and one day of working in a production plant. Normally none of this would phase me but I am exhausted and worrying about feeling worse. I'm worried that if I take the unisom I need not to vomit I'll be too tired to work and drive. If I don't I may be too sick to work. I felt really terrible at 9 weeks with my last pregnancy. Anything I ate made me dizzy because all the blood went to my stomach.</p> <p>Then there's the whole purpose of the trip. To taste products that pregnant women can't eat. That's the whole focus of my job right now. I've been spitting which I think is acceptable but I don't know how he will feel. This has been my strategy so far.</p> <p>I really don't want to tell the boss before I've seen a heartbeat but that will be just a few days before the trip. I'm leaning towards telling. Do I mention the early pregnancy symptom concerns or just the tasting concerns and my planned modifications. </p>