https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Tue, 21 Apr 2026 01:02:10 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/could-this-be-ppa#post-2891823 Sun, 21 Jul 2019 05:28:56 +0000 pachamama 2891823@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@MrsSCB: I was the same way about environmental concerns. My school was under a construction project when I went back at 20 weeks pregnant and I ended up taken mental health and leaving bc I was so worried about weird shit contaminating me and the baby. I guess it was valid but I totally took it to another level.<br /> Your baby is starting daycare so I'm sure the anxiety is increasing! It will get better I promise! That adjustment is a particularly tough time for babies and you. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/could-this-be-ppa#post-2891802 Sat, 20 Jul 2019 15:32:53 +0000 MrsSCB 2891802@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Dahlia: @gotkimchi: I had no idea until I read a list of symptoms that talked about rage and irritability that it could be related. And then it hit me that maybe PPA could explain how I've been feeling. I've also been fixating a bit about safe sleep this time around... Like she starts daycare Monday, and I'm SO worried about whether she'll be put down in a safe space to sleep. Even though I know her daycare provider has a crib for her and is licensed by the state and county, and sleep spaces are a licensing requirement. Argh. </p> <p>@Mrs. Champagne: I'm realizing that with my first, I was irrationally concerned about environmental hazards. We started renting an older home shortly after he was born, and I worried a LOT about lead paint, even though the house had obviously been painted many times since it was built, and I had read that it wasn't really a concern as long as active construction wasn't going on. I was so relieved when they did the lead poisoning screening and it was normal. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/could-this-be-ppa#post-2891757 Fri, 19 Jul 2019 19:33:32 +0000 Mrs. Champagne 2891757@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Sounds like anxiety for sure. I had similar symptoms and my worry was about my own health, not the baby. Like constantly googling “symptoms”. Going to a therapist really helped. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/could-this-be-ppa#post-2891743 Fri, 19 Jul 2019 16:45:46 +0000 gotkimchi 2891743@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I just read an article about how no one talks about ppa/ppd and rage. It’s a real thing and I’d keep an close eye on how it’s affecting your quality of life and if it’s getting better/lifting or not. If you feel like you need help call your ob or even your pediatrician </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/could-this-be-ppa#post-2891734 Fri, 19 Jul 2019 15:40:43 +0000 Dahlia 2891734@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Absolutely. Irritability/rage is one of my key indicators I'm feeling anxious, even if I don't realize it. Call your doctor. Zoloft made a world of difference for me. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/could-this-be-ppa#post-2891733 Fri, 19 Jul 2019 15:30:59 +0000 periwinklebee 2891733@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@pachamama: while LO did go to daycare, we didn't hire a babysitter to come to our house until he was around 15 months. We've been doing it more often lately (there's been a ton going on, I'm pregnant, and just really needed a bit of extra help some weekends to ensure I can keep our life/house functioning on a level I'm comfortable with), and it's been hugely helpful... </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/could-this-be-ppa#post-2891728 Fri, 19 Jul 2019 15:16:30 +0000 pachamama 2891728@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>one more thing. OBs are really not trained in any sort of mental health issues. I think they do like 2weeks during their rotations on it. Talk to other moms and see if they're seeing a therapist or get a good psychiatrist who can prescribe you medicine. my OB was drastically unqualified to address my mental health needs and the Zoloft was a shitshow. she didn't tell me about how to wean, how long it would take to work, how I would lose the ability to orgasm, warn me of suicidal thoughts. She literally was like, go pick it up at CVS ✌️<br /> And about the babysitter thing. I know it is so so hard to leave the baby. But it's really important for the baby to be away from you every once in awhile and it's incredible how refreshing a little break can be, even if it's an hour at a coffee shop! looking back, I wish I had taken more time for myself. I think I would have made me a better Mom. I'm doing it this time though! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/could-this-be-ppa#post-2891727 Fri, 19 Jul 2019 15:08:30 +0000 periwinklebee 2891727@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm sorry :heart: I tend to agree with @pachamama: that this is a good first line approach. Would it be an option to have a college student come Sat or Sun morning and watch the kids for a bit while you nap or squeeze in some other relaxing activity? Or have your husband take this shift? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/could-this-be-ppa#post-2891726 Fri, 19 Jul 2019 14:53:08 +0000 MrsSCB 2891726@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@MamaBear87: @pachamama: yes, it’s so weird! My husband accidentally brushed my arm, and I literally pushed his hand away. It was totally involuntary, I was just so startled. He was like, “umm??” 😳</p> <p>@Mrs. Carrot: I totally relate. Especially when I forget things, I feel like a huge failure. Like I forgot about an activity I wanted to take my toddler to on July 4. It wasn’t a big deal, he didn’t even know about it. But I was just so upset and mad at myself. And then it makes me lash out at my husband because I feel like I’m the one always having to remember and organize things, so maybe if that wasn’t the case, I wouldn’t forget so much....which is a real issue we’re working on, but it’s still not a healthy way for me to react. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/could-this-be-ppa#post-2891724 Fri, 19 Jul 2019 14:47:17 +0000 pachamama 2891724@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@MrsSCB: okay even the touch thing? Your body is pumping with sooo much adrenaline and cortisol because of having a newborn (it's actually a protective mechanism our bodies/minds do to protect baby) that it puts you on edge. I remember being so so jumpy and I never was before. It's biologically a way to keep you literally ready to pounce and protect the baby. I researched a lot about this because it was so scary what was happening to me! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/could-this-be-ppa#post-2891722 Fri, 19 Jul 2019 14:45:02 +0000 pachamama 2891722@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@MrsSCB: GIRL THIS WAS ME. well, is me. Exactly like you described. I think a lot of it is sleep deprivation though. And definitely PPA. Mine did not manifest in worry about the baby really either. I was extraordinarily irritable and ragey. Everything was a HUGE FUCKING DEAL. I was a FAILURE. it was so rough.<br /> I tried Zoloft and it did not go well but I know many women who've had good luck with it. I wish somebody would have told me more about the side effects and showing me other options.<br /> if I could offer advice, I would let yourself regulate with hormones and sleep and then decide about a medication. But that's just me! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/could-this-be-ppa#post-2891714 Fri, 19 Jul 2019 14:35:54 +0000 Mrs. Carrot 2891714@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>This sounds a lot like what I experienced. I was definitely worried about the baby but for me it showed more as a need to control everything and every setback felt like the most epic failure and feeling like everything would spiral out of control because of one tiny thing not going according to plan. I honestly just assumed it was just me trying to be a good mom, so I never saw a doc but in hindsight I really should have and I would talk to your OB for sure. Good luck! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/could-this-be-ppa#post-2891711 Fri, 19 Jul 2019 14:23:45 +0000 MamaBear87 2891711@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Call your ob. I didn't have ppa but had major anxiety issues due to something else and had alot of those symptoms. Especially the being overly surprised when being touched.<br /> I take a supplement called myo-inositol and use rescue remedy to help. There are also lots of breathing exercises that help quite a bit </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/could-this-be-ppa#post-2891710 Fri, 19 Jul 2019 14:13:02 +0000 MrsSCB 2891710@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I always thought PPA was just, like...worrying a lot about the baby. But I read through some symptoms recently and am wondering if how I feel could be PPA? I am super irritable, the smallest things can make me ragey. I feel very on edge, like if someone accidentally touches me, it's so startling and I want to smack them away. If even minor things don't go according to plan, I feel SO overwhelmed, like it's the worst thing in the world. And I often feel like my brain is overloaded--constantly moving from one thing to another, like my thoughts are racing. Anyone experience this? Did you end up taking medication? Who would I talk to, my OB? My baby is 16 weeks, so I've already had my follow up appointment. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/anxiety#post-2873582 Fri, 22 Feb 2019 22:52:09 +0000 Shantuck 2873582@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Yoyo: The 4-7-8 method slows down your heart rate so maybe that’s why you feel lightheaded when you do it. That is usually my first thing to try when I feel super stressed and unable to sleep. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/anxiety#post-2872884 Tue, 19 Feb 2019 14:17:51 +0000 MamaBear87 2872884@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Yoyo: no that's pretty normal. It's a different way of breathing so your body isn't used to it. You should only be doing 4 sets of breath like that to start with. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/anxiety#post-2872865 Tue, 19 Feb 2019 13:13:37 +0000 Mrs. Yoyo 2872865@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@MamaBear87: Every time I try the 4-7-8 breathing or any other technique where I have to breathe in for a set period of time, I always feel kinda weird and lightheaded. I'm probably doing it wrong ....</p> <p>@Mrs. Twine: Hiya old pal! The nostril thing is intriguing, will have to give it a shot. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/anxiety#post-2872832 Tue, 19 Feb 2019 11:08:59 +0000 MamaBear87 2872832@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Yoyo: I use rescue remedy when I feel like my panic attacks might be coming back. It's an herbal remedy you can grab it at sprouts or likely any more natural store. It just helps take the edge off for me and let's me focus on something else</p> <p>4-7-8 breathing also really helps me relax </p> <p>And as mentioned above yoga and meditation help greatly </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/anxiety#post-2872806 Tue, 19 Feb 2019 09:16:54 +0000 Mrs. Twine 2872806@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Yoyo: I almost posted to your wall, but I realized that lots and lots of people have anxiety and that it might be friendlier to share where everyone can see.</p> <p>Look up alternate nostril breathing. For some reason, this particular breathing technique is like taking a tranquilizer for me. No matter how amped up I am, it will settle me to a more manageable level. Sometimes I need to do it more than once; so I will do it once, I'll still feel pretty anxious after stopping, so I will do it again-- that sort of thing. </p> <p>If you do yoga, there's this one lady on YouTube, YogaCandi, and her voice is seriously soothing. I save her practices sometimes for days when I'm feeling anxious or stressed out and it's hard to listen to the frantic voices in my brain if I'm a) moving my body in a way that forces me to concentrate, and b) listening to a voice that sounds like maybe a female version of Mr. Rogers and doesn't seem like it could exist in a world where any of the things I'm worrying about would ever happen.</p> <p>Meditation Minis podcast. This lady is a hypnotist (no, really!) and she sort of sounds like one. There are all sorts of themes and some of them specifically address things like getting back to sleep or dealing with anxiety. In addition to the meditation part she will often offer practical tips (there's a link between magnesium deficiency and anxiety, so taking a magnesium supplement can sometimes help). I don't really prefer the ads (distracting) or the fact that she will sometimes promote paid programs that she does, but the main content is really solid (fast forward? that's what I usually do).</p> <p>Clearly I have anxiety issues, but at least I have coping tools, too?? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/anxiety#post-2872804 Tue, 19 Feb 2019 09:00:12 +0000 Mrs. Yoyo 2872804@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Bumping to see if anyone else has words of wisdom ... I've had a few sleepless nights lately (usually sleep like a rock) due to various worries totally running away with me. I picked up some Unisom but would rather keep that as a last resort. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/helpful-suggestions#post-2800018 Fri, 26 Jan 2018 14:43:42 +0000 crazydoglady 2800018@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@babybunnylove: I've been taking zoloft for nearly 13 years (on and off at times) and I haven't noticed any notable side effects. The important thing is to start on a lower dosage and work your way up to the dosage that works for you. I know there are quite a few bees on here who have taken zoloft. I will say that being on zoloft doesn't make my to-do list any shorter, it just makes my ability to deal with it SO much better and I am less likely to ruminate over things. In the past, I didn't like the label of taking behavioral meds but, now, I don't care. For me, it's part of self-care. Obviously, this is a personal decision, I just wanted to share my experience. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/helpful-suggestions#post-2799999 Fri, 26 Jan 2018 14:20:39 +0000 MrsSRS 2799999@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>It really helped me if I could just move around a bit. So I would try to vacuum the house first thing in the morning or something like that. Also Bach's Rescue Remedy, St. John's Wort, and trying to just focus on one task at a time. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/helpful-suggestions#post-2799903 Fri, 26 Jan 2018 10:46:29 +0000 jennlin821 2799903@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@babybunnylove: I solo parent during the week (DD is 13 mo old) and I work full time, so I can understand how crushing all the responsibility can feel. </p> <p>Is there something that you can let go of, stop doing something?<br /> For example, I stopped sweeping and vacuuming during the week. I live in Maine, so we trek in salt, sand and snow and DD is eating on her own, so cheerios are constantly on the floor. It was so draining and defeating that I would sweep every night after her dinner and it would be a mess again 12 hours later after breakfast AND THEN have to do it another 10 hours later after dinner.<br /> We never had guesting during the week, so besides any huge or very wet, staining messes (spaghetti, oatmeal, etc) I just leave it. Its not ideal, but it was a huge relief to me once I decided it didn't need to get done. </p> <p>So if you can think about something that you can 'let go' of, that may help. I hate it when I'm spending my precious few minutes with DD thinking about what else I 'should' be doing. </p> <p>One more thing, it sounds like you don't have any time for self-care. With a new job it might be tricky, but could you take a day off (or a half day) while the kids are in daycare?<br /> Then do what you need to do to feel refreshed... go for a walk, sleep, clean, read, etc.? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/helpful-suggestions#post-2799880 Fri, 26 Jan 2018 10:20:34 +0000 babybunnylove 2799880@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@crazydoglady: my doctor has prescribed me Zoloft however I’m scared of the side effects. Even husband is worried of the side effects since I’m alone with the kids 99% of the time. I do go to therapy. But with job change we have a few weeks with no insurance. I love my kids and being with the but just wish I was happier. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/helpful-suggestions#post-2799844 Fri, 26 Jan 2018 05:04:12 +0000 ElbieKay 2799844@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I really did not enjoy parenting an infant. I think I would have liked it for 6-8 hours per day, but the relentless nature was really hard for me. I felt guilty to be relieved to go back to work, and then I was so tired and overwhelmed by my life that I was distracted and ineffective at work.</p> <p>I had no idea when I would stop feeling that way. I reached a few milestones on that: (1) when my son turned 10mo he started to be a lttle more fun (2) when he started talking he started to be a lot more fun (3) when I finally killed my last nursing session at 14mos, it was really freeing and (4) a few months later, I joined an expensive gym with a shmancy locker room and left the house at 6am twice per week to exercise and shower in peace.m before work.</p> <p>Those were the milestones that got me on to a path towards feeling like a human being instead of a baby slave.</p> <p>In hindsight, I wish I had (a) given myself more breaks sooner (which frankly felt impossible at the time due to nursing coupled with an intense hatred of pumping) and (b) understood how freaking awesome my kid would eventually be. During the slog, I had no idea how very worth it all that effort would eventually be.</p> <p>I am pregnant again now and pretty worried about this issue but I think/hope that I will have better perspective this time. Plus I will have to spend less time focused exclusively on the babies because I can't just ignore my son. And with twins there is no way I can do it all, so I may as well just take some breaks and hang out with someone who speaks English!</p> <p>I don't know how old your child is, or how long you have felt this way. But I am certain that you will find your parenting sweet spot eventually. I wish I could have had faith in that when my son was so young and demanding. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/helpful-suggestions#post-2799840 Thu, 25 Jan 2018 23:08:09 +0000 crazydoglady 2799840@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@babybunnylove: Sorry if this has been mentioned but have you looked into an SSRI like Zoloft? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/helpful-suggestions#post-2799839 Thu, 25 Jan 2018 23:03:15 +0000 babybunnylove 2799839@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>With two now in daycare we can’t financially swing anything extra. It seems like everything is just very hard right now. I’m stressed out and it’s affecting my pumping output which makes me stress more. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/helpful-suggestions#post-2799809 Thu, 25 Jan 2018 19:16:14 +0000 lamariniere 2799809@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Another list maker here!</p> <p>I sometimes struggle with panic disorder, so a lot of my symptoms are my body but not my mind. What I do is find a 10 min youtube video and do a guided mindfulness meditation. It can really help calm me down and help me refocus. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/helpful-suggestions#post-2799806 Thu, 25 Jan 2018 19:05:44 +0000 MamaCate 2799806@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@babybunnylove: I am so sorry you are struggling! My survival toolkit includes:<br /> -deep breaths<br /> -cursing<br /> -saying over and over again “this too shall pass”<br /> -rewarding myself with little treats for making it through the day like chocolate or beer or both<br /> -sometimes trying to get through the next 5 minutes, next hour, next email, next meeting when it all feels overwhelming can help it feel not so bad.</p> <p>You will find your groove eventually so try to be patient with yourself. I remember being so overwhelmed when I went back to work and now we are 6 years into the work/family juggle</p> <p>ETA: we couldn’t afford to hire outside help when lo1 was a baby so we tried to find cheap ways to catch a break, like take and bake pizza on Fridays instead of delivery. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/helpful-suggestions#post-2799805 Thu, 25 Jan 2018 18:59:34 +0000 hellobeeboston 2799805@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I, like everyone else it seems, feel a little better with a list. Going back and getting into a new routine is so hard. It will get easier. Are there any areas you can make easier somehow? Order out for dinner? Have a cleaner once or twice a month? A mother’s helper for an hour or two when you get home?</p> <p>Lightening your load in one area could really help.</p> <p>A new job is stressful but you will settle into it!</p> <p>Good luck. My other suggestion would be to take a day off for a mental health day (even to just lay around all day and do nothing, I just did this)... but hard to do in a new job. Maybe next month. </p>