https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Mon, 06 Apr 2026 19:51:23 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-soothe-newborn-wout-a-pacisoothie#post-682740 Mon, 01 Apr 2013 16:52:26 +0000 shopaholic 682740@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@hilsy85: Seriously! Every day it's something different or whatever works is just so temporary! I think we have a couple other pacifiers we were given, will go look for them now. This mama is tired!</p> <p>@T-Mom: I sure hope so too! </p> <p>@nikol: I tried doing that a couple of times today and it works for a short amount of time. But once she gets full awakened in it, she gets MAD in the carrier too! I do need to learn how to nurse in the carrier too. </p> <p>Glad to hear so many of you have LOs that aren't dependent on the pacis. I just don't know how I'll make it another month or 2 before she learns to self-soothe... </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-soothe-newborn-wout-a-pacisoothie#post-682739 Mon, 01 Apr 2013 16:52:13 +0000 PurpleUnicorn 682739@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>i was never anti paci but i did wait about 8 weeks because i was taught that in my BF course at the hospital that it was better to wait. then i was amazed how much how he loved it! I think we became too dependent on it for a while, so now during the day, i am making an effort to not give it so much unless he really seems to need it. and i am getting DH on board. we still use it at night to put him to sleep and when he wakes during the night. though it falls out a minute or two after he is actually asleep. not sure when we are going to wean it off either. still thinking/reading about it. he is almost 5m.</p> <p>as for other ways to soothe.....i think you've answered your question! there is the boob, his hands, your fingers....i don't think there is much else...babies like to suck!! L will put anything and everything in his mouth that fits, i actually find it amusing at times how hard he tries to get things in his mouth. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-soothe-newborn-wout-a-pacisoothie#post-682642 Mon, 01 Apr 2013 16:19:29 +0000 filly 682642@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>my twin girls will be 5 months on April 7th. i was all about the NO PACI bc I too didn't want them dependent on it. Well let me tell you something, the paci has done wonders for my sanity. </p> <p>they only get it when they go down for naps and nighttime &amp; they actually aren't dependent on it at all. i do carry them in the diaper bag when we're out and about. the girls prefer their lovey blanket and/or their hands. </p> <p>oh and the Soothie Pacifiers were the ones they loved in the beginning but now they only take the Nuk brand. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-soothe-newborn-wout-a-pacisoothie#post-682564 Mon, 01 Apr 2013 15:53:16 +0000 nikol 682564@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>i caved and gave my lo a paci for times when i really need to use the restroom while he was comfort nursing but i didn't want to wake him, or if i needed a minute to myself so dh could watch him. he took it happily for a couple of months, but now he acts offended if we offer it to him. we still keep it around because he likes to chew on it, and because it's a 'moustachifier' and i can't bring myself to get rid of it. he is 8 months old. </p> <p>for the most part though, in terms of getting things done around the house, i would just strap him in the ergobaby and go to town. he was able to nurse to his heart's content, and i was able to take care of all my grownup duties. win/win. now he only comfort nurses on his way to sleep, or if he's uncomfortable. so, it did get easier! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-soothe-newborn-wout-a-pacisoothie#post-682550 Mon, 01 Apr 2013 15:47:32 +0000 LuLu Mom 682550@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@shopaholic: I was antisoothie as well until about 3 months and I finally gave in. WE only do it at naps and bedtime so she definetely isn't addicted, I bet we could take it from her with no problems but she can seth-soothe at night with it and take it in and out now. She will be broken of it before her 1st birthday for sure, I'm not a fan of a kid who can talk walking with a pacifier. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-soothe-newborn-wout-a-pacisoothie#post-682546 Mon, 01 Apr 2013 15:43:55 +0000 T-Mom 682546@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@shopaholic: if you are open to the paci, my kids liked the MAM pacis only. They make one for the tiny babies, it's called the nano. It's much lighter than a soothie and easier to keep in. Your LO is still really small, so hopefully in the next few weeks things will improve! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-soothe-newborn-wout-a-pacisoothie#post-682542 Mon, 01 Apr 2013 15:42:52 +0000 Mrs. Jacks 682542@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Our first daughter wouldn't take a pacifier and we really wanted her to. I was her human pacifier... and was all she wanted. It was exhausting!</p> <p>With our second daughter, she took to the pacifier (thank god) and we just give it to her so she can fall asleep for naps and night time. She's not too attached to it otherwise. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-soothe-newborn-wout-a-pacisoothie#post-682505 Mon, 01 Apr 2013 15:28:11 +0000 hilsy85 682505@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@shopaholic: I would try different types, and just keep trying--what they don't like one day they may love the next. </p> <p>As for the hand/thumb vs paci debate, I honestly don't think either is that big a deal...the way i think of it, I'll deal with getting rid of the paci when the time comes. Right now, it's great at helping him fall asleep or calm him down, and I'm certainly not going to deny myself a great tool in my parenting toolbox! He's not going to be going to kindergarten with a paci in his mouth :) And if he DOES suck his thumb, then we'll deal with that when the time comes as well. I don't know any adults who suck their thumbs! :) Try not to stress too much, or to think too much about "what if..." in the future. Things will change a million times between now and then! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-soothe-newborn-wout-a-pacisoothie#post-682465 Mon, 01 Apr 2013 15:19:48 +0000 shopaholic 682465@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@boiledpnut: I totally agree with this. But I'm at the point where it's really hard to get anything done without having her attached to me. I enjoy the bonding and don't mind comfort nursing if she could fall and stay asleep, but more often than not she'll wake up for any little thing.</p> <p>@Beehive: @artbee: @wheres_c: @travelgirl1: @Mrs. High Heels: Is it true it's worse to let them suck on their hands and fingers? K has always wanted to suck her hands since Day 1. The ped told us better to use a paci than to let her suck her fingers? IDK what to do anymore.... She hates the swaddle unless she's already asleep. The white noise also only helps to keep her asleep if she's already asleep. Shushing doesn't work. Swaying and rocking works sometimes but not enough to put her to sleep. Bouncing works but takes a huge toll on my arms and back. Bouncer and swing also only are good if she's already asleep or almost there and that's only sometimes.<br /> Right now I can just be a human pacifier and let her suck till she falls asleep but she wakes so easily and then I don't know what to do. Broke down today and tried to give her a soothie and she wouldn't take it she was so frustrated. Ahhh. I hope this ability to self soothe happens soon for us! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-soothe-newborn-wout-a-pacisoothie#post-678883 Sat, 30 Mar 2013 09:34:02 +0000 Beehive 678883@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We gave our LO a paci from the beginning, and it worked really well for us - we only really gave it when necessary (if he was super fussy, or needed help napping, or was in the carseat), and it would calm him down and keep him calm. Now at 5 months, and probably starting around 4 months or so, he self-soothes with his fingers or primarily his thumb, and when we give him a pacifier he treats it like it's another toy - he'll pull it out, look at it, suck on the handle, pull it out, etc. So it only works now in the sense of being a distraction or a toy! </p> <p>We are also very conscious of not wanting our LO to use a pacifier as a toddler, but I understand there are ways to wean off the pacifier without too much trouble if they're still using one at that point (at this rate it doesn't seem like our LO will be). </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-soothe-newborn-wout-a-pacisoothie#post-678844 Sat, 30 Mar 2013 08:58:14 +0000 bpcmarj 678844@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@boiledpnut: yes, this is my exact thought, too. :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-soothe-newborn-wout-a-pacisoothie#post-678837 Sat, 30 Mar 2013 08:53:13 +0000 boiledpnut 678837@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I let DS use me as a pacifier. Nursing is much more than feeding. Non-nutritive sucking is good for both of you. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-soothe-newborn-wout-a-pacisoothie#post-678796 Sat, 30 Mar 2013 08:11:23 +0000 Weagle 678796@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We weren't necessarily anti-paci, but I was wary of it. I thought she would LOVE it, but as it turns out, LO only took it for a few weeks. Then she figured out how to calm herself. There were many times Over the past10 months that I wished she would take it! I think if you use it sparingly, it's much easier to break the habit. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-soothe-newborn-wout-a-pacisoothie#post-678774 Sat, 30 Mar 2013 07:50:35 +0000 Sammyfab 678774@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We did the finger trick for the first few weeks because my LO wouldn't take a paci. We actually really wanted him to take a paci because he had such a strong need to suck and he was a fussy baby. He finally started taking a paci at 8-ish weeks and I was ecstatic!! He did become a paci addict for awhile (which I was a little embarrassed about) but around 8.5 months we stopped giving it to him aside from naps. At 9.5 months we stopped giving it to him for naps. Now he has absolutely no attachment to pacis and the weaning involved no crying whatsoever.</p> <p>So all of that was to say that giving a paci in infancy =/= a toddler walking and talking with a paci in their mouth. I think after a certain age (maybe 12-18 months?) it becomes more of an issue of behaviour/discipline issue than an actual physical need to suck for comfort. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-soothe-newborn-wout-a-pacisoothie#post-678731 Sat, 30 Mar 2013 06:43:48 +0000 Beebug 678731@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I was (like other above!) anti-paci but DH wanted to try it and I totally saw how it benefited my LO! In the last two weeks we've pretty much cut it from her (she is 5m) and only gets it when she is cranky, or noisy and we need her quiet (church, lol). She doesn't get it for sleep at all any more. I thought it would be harder to use it less as I think we got to relying on it pretty good, and now I am glad we did it how we did.</p> <p>Good luck!! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-soothe-newborn-wout-a-pacisoothie#post-678726 Sat, 30 Mar 2013 06:39:19 +0000 oliviaoblivia 678726@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We were not anti paci in a militant way, just more wishy washy about it. LO didn't get one until eight weeks. I'm happy now that she uses it because the comfort nursing was out of control and she was using it as a sleep crutch. Now after I know she's done eating I put her down and if it looks like she needs a nudge I pop a paci in. She literally sucks four times, falls deeply asleep, then pops it out. I'm not worried about long term use cause its only in her mouth for like twenty seconds. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-soothe-newborn-wout-a-pacisoothie#post-678705 Sat, 30 Mar 2013 05:52:28 +0000 heffalump 678705@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Like many others here, I was also anti paci. And then LO came, and she screamed and screamed and screamed, and I said I'd do anything to help her soothe, including a paci. But then she didn't want it. She'd suck on our fingers occasionally, but soon she found her own and now she's a thumb sucker. </p> <p>I feel like I don't get to make a lot of the decisions anymore about what LO wants/gets. She makes those decisions for me :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-soothe-newborn-wout-a-pacisoothie#post-678693 Sat, 30 Mar 2013 05:22:18 +0000 photojane 678693@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>As a little bit of a different perspective, I'm very pro-paci. I sucked my two middle fingers growing up because my mom didn't want to give me a paci. I had a very difficult time breaking the finger sucking habit because I always had them with me. I sucked my fingers to go to sleep until I was school-aged (maybe 5 or 6?) and only stopped with a lot of training &amp; bribery from my mom. I made sure to give Sadie the paci, so that we didn't deal with this... you can always take a paci away! </p> <p>Every child reacts to them differently, so maybe you could just try and see how K reacts? Sadie doesn't need (or usually want) it to be soothed or to fall asleep, but I noticed that it helps her in the in between stage of sleep. When I've already put her to sleep, but she's only lightly out, sucking her paci helps get her all the way out faster. </p> <p>If you're adamantly against the paci, there's not much you can do about the car. S likes the car, but if she's ever fussy in her seat we just turn her seahorse on and it calms her.- you could try bringing K's in the car &amp; turning it on before you leave. At home I think her sucking your finger is fine, and loud shushing/white noise, walking, and bouncing/jiggling are helpful. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-soothe-newborn-wout-a-pacisoothie#post-678683 Sat, 30 Mar 2013 04:18:56 +0000 pl0508 678683@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I was told to give the paci unless I wanted to become it ! We only use it to help when he is really fussy ! I isn't hooked yet ! Other things that work for us : walking and jiggling , white noise, offering my finger ... </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-soothe-newborn-wout-a-pacisoothie#post-678639 Sat, 30 Mar 2013 00:29:14 +0000 lemondrop 678639@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We only used one at dinner or when we were out and about. He used it in the early days (when I needed a break the most), but never really took to needing it, so after a few months we just sort of forgot about it. You can choose when you use it, it isn't an all or nothing situation. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-soothe-newborn-wout-a-pacisoothie#post-678638 Sat, 30 Mar 2013 00:28:46 +0000 wheres_c 678638@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I had the exact same experience as @travelgirl1: I was anti paci, and then around the 2 month mark, and he started being more alert, he couldn't calm himself. I broke down and gave one to him but he wouldn't take it. I tried once or twice since then in times of desperation and he spit it again.</p> <p>At 3 months, he found his hands and shoved them and toys into his mouth. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-soothe-newborn-wout-a-pacisoothie#post-678637 Sat, 30 Mar 2013 00:27:16 +0000 pinkcupcake 678637@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I was very anti paci but gave in finally bc my nipples were so sore and cracked from the constant comfort sucking. My LO was never a huge fan of the paci but it def soothed her when she needed to sleep. I was really worried about weaning her off it but she just quit wanting it one day when she was around 11.5 months old and naturally weAned herself. So if you have to use one, hopefully your LO will wean herself once she learns how to self soothe </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-soothe-newborn-wout-a-pacisoothie#post-678617 Fri, 29 Mar 2013 23:53:21 +0000 travelgirl1 678617@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We did and still do the finger trick.. I don't wear nail polish anymore in case I need to offer her a finger while we're out : ) We never wanted to give her a soother but we eventually broke (I actually cried when I gave her it) and offered her one and I don't know why I'd been so worried because she never took it, she spat it out further than an Olympic javelin thrower, ha ha. Like @Mrs. High Heels:'s LO, she wanted the real deal. Now she's found her hands and can grab toys she has more variety of stuff to shove in her mouth (so people still assume she's hungry, even though putting things in their mouth is just what babies do!!!!). Sorry, I know my answer wasn't much help, but if you're happy using your finger it might help. Soon she'll find her hands and it will be much easier. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-soothe-newborn-wout-a-pacisoothie#post-678600 Fri, 29 Mar 2013 23:35:00 +0000 Mrs. High Heels 678600@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@shopaholic: i WISH my kids liked the soothie. we did everything we could to get them into it. i think i tried 5 different brands of paci's with noelle - no dice. she wanted the real deal. ;) she did eventually find her hands though! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-soothe-newborn-wout-a-pacisoothie#post-678595 Fri, 29 Mar 2013 23:26:25 +0000 shopaholic 678595@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>DH and I have always been on the "no pacifier/soothie" belief on how we wanted to raise our LO. We have a lot of friends who never had to use a pacifier or soothie. And others, whose 3 year olds still can't give them up. Either way, we both just really didn't want to ever start with the pacifier.</p> <p>But I seriously think K would love a paci/soothie and we don't want to succumb to it. She is CONSTANTLY "rooting". I could feed her 20 min. apart for 20 min. each time and in the past few days I can tell that for a good part of each session, she has started just comfort sucking. I don't mind, but she is also not falling asleep. Just sucking, almost falling asleep, fussing, want the boob again, repeat. If anyone else is holding her, they always hand her back to me saying "she's hungry" or "she's looking for a boob!" I don't mind when we are home. But it's really draining in the middle of the night, and makes going out a lot more difficult. I also know she'd probably like a paci on car rides, when half the time she's wailing her little lungs out. Sometimes we've let her suck on our clean finger just to calm her down. </p> <p>Does anyone have any alternative solution to soothe a newborn without a paci/soothie? Or is resistance futile?<br /> * Sorry if the post is written weird. It's taken me 2 days to finish and I'm a little delirious! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/dependant-on-the-breast#post-75174 Wed, 15 Feb 2012 12:22:26 +0000 anbanan15 75174@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Thanks for the advice. </p> <p>I do offer the pacifier. I switch it out to help soothe him. I also offer it when he wakes BEFORE the breast or automatically going to the night nursing. However, it doesn't cut it most of the time at night. I'm convinced he can tell the difference.</p> <p>He's been sleeping better lately (finally getting his allergies under control and his tummy isn't hurting as much) so I've been thinking about trying to transition him back to his crib again. I'm guessing it would be less traumatic to transition from co-sleeping before weaning... </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/dependant-on-the-breast#post-74567 Tue, 14 Feb 2012 14:27:39 +0000 mommacommaphd 74567@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Pretty early on I was able to get my daughter to finish nursing and then take a pacifier. It soothed her to have something to suck on, and it meant it didn't have to be my boob.</p> <p>Can you offer a pacifier?</p> <p>Also, I agree with it being easier if he's not in your bed. Perhaps try to transition from nursing him to sleep at bedtime. If he can get himself to sleep without nursing at bedtime, he can learn to do the same in the night.</p> <p>However, I have to say that to get my daughter to STTN we had to sleep train. She was waking frequently and nobody was getting enough sleep. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/dependant-on-the-breast#post-74456 Tue, 14 Feb 2012 13:39:44 +0000 T.H.O.U. 74456@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I know my LO is way more dependent on the boob if we are co-sleeping. When I can get her to sleep and put her down in her crib she is fine. Usually when I pull her off, she cries a bit but if I immediately bounce/sway her she will fall back asleep without latching and then I can lay her down. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/dependant-on-the-breast#post-74440 Tue, 14 Feb 2012 13:29:24 +0000 anbanan15 74440@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I wish! </p> <p>Half of my thinks he is still hungry since he isn't on many solids (food allergies and slow introduction due to reactionsS), but at our 9 month appointment our pedi was pushing for me to drop the night feedings. He's only nursing 4-5 times a day without many solids, so I feel her advice may have been off base...using my mommy gut there. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/dependant-on-the-breast#post-74431 Tue, 14 Feb 2012 13:25:08 +0000 Mrs. Bee 74431@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>can your husband soothe your son back to sleep? he knows that dad has no boobs! </p>