https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Wed, 29 Apr 2026 17:39:42 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/table-manner-rules#post-2892378 Thu, 25 Jul 2019 20:52:45 +0000 Littlebit7 2892378@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Oooof I feel like I run a house or heathens after reading this. DH isn’t home 5/7 nights. The kids eat at 5 so we eat after bedtime. </p> <p>The kids (18 mo and 4) eat on the island on stools/inglesina. It’s a free for all. I can really only enforce the older one, and a do try. But I literally bathe the baby while she’s eating (bath is practically in the kitchen, hey it’s city living). So 🤷‍♀️ </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/table-manner-rules#post-2892350 Thu, 25 Jul 2019 18:46:16 +0000 brownepiano 2892350@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We use stools at our tables for the kids that way they are high enough to reach their food and it takes some effort to stay on their stool so they aren't hanging off.<br /> Rules are:<br /> no shooting at the table (or playing games in general or toys - boy mom problems)<br /> Ask for things to be passed (served)<br /> Ask to be excused<br /> Clean up dishes after getting down</p> <p>We don't usually make them wait till everyone is done so that's rough when we do have guests. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/table-manner-rules#post-2892208 Thu, 25 Jul 2019 05:59:54 +0000 catgirl 2892208@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Stay seated.<br /> Plate/bowl stays on table<br /> We encourage utensil use but don't battle over it<br /> Inside voice/no yelling<br /> No toys/electronics<br /> Everyone stays at the table until we are done<br /> Help clear dishes</p> <p>If we are out at a restaurant we always have crayons and paper with us - she can use them while waiting for the food. If we are in a group and we are taking a long time she can also have them after she has finished. </p> <p>We try to stick to our rules when we have guests at our house but will sometimes excuse her if the meal is taking a long time. At other peoples houses it's case by case, but we always tell her if something is an exception to our rules. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/table-manner-rules#post-2892203 Thu, 25 Jul 2019 05:16:31 +0000 pachamama 2892203@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I have a 3.5 year old and we feed him at the kitchen island. My only rule is for him to take 3 bites. He's up constantly and barely eats anything.<br /> No screens including at restaurants which is absolute hell but we are trying to stick to it. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/table-manner-rules#post-2892198 Wed, 24 Jul 2019 23:50:33 +0000 misolee 2892198@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>No toys at the table.<br /> Sitting age appropriate correctly (like my almost seven year old is expected to sit in bottom with back straight and not like slumped over sideways. My three year old is expected to just sit down instead of standing up and eating. )<br /> My almost seven year old talks and talks and talks. So she has to take certain number of bites before she’s allowed to talk. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/table-manner-rules#post-2892197 Wed, 24 Jul 2019 23:00:13 +0000 DesertDreams88 2892197@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>... I don't really care about any of this. </p> <p>So there's that option, too. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/table-manner-rules#post-2892193 Wed, 24 Jul 2019 21:34:47 +0000 crazydoglady 2892193@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>-Pray first<br /> -On your bottom<br /> -No devices<br /> -You dont have to finish your food, but you aren't getting anything else </p> <p>I'm going to be honest and say that we got out of the habit of eating together after baby girl was born and we are working on getting back to it. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/table-manner-rules#post-2892192 Wed, 24 Jul 2019 20:52:01 +0000 mrs.kiwi 2892192@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>-stay in seat<br /> -sit properly<br /> -finish food<br /> -eat nicely (with utensils, no being gross)</p> <p>That’s kind of it.. we let them escape as soon as they’re finished.. sometimes I offer some fruit or “dessert”... my 5yo struggles with sittinf properly- partly due to the jiggles and being excited about other things and partly because the chair is too big for him lol. My 3yo sits better than him probably because she is in a booster. The 18mo sits nicely bc he is strapped in. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/table-manner-rules#post-2892176 Wed, 24 Jul 2019 16:44:31 +0000 Silva 2892176@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We had luck with purchasing chairs that allowed my kids to rest their feet. Way less monkeying around now that they don’t have dangling feet 🤷‍♀️ </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/table-manner-rules#post-2892175 Wed, 24 Jul 2019 16:26:18 +0000 mrswin 2892175@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@JennyPenny: DD is 4 and she helps to set the table, will take her plate once she is finished, has to use please and thank you, and use utensils to eat with. She is expected to stay at the table until everyone is finished eating but in a restaurant is allowed crayons, paper/colouring books or similar to keep her entertained while the adults eat/talk.<br /> As far as the sitting still goes we were threatening to get the booster back out but the I came across this at IKEA and it was life changing. It allows her to sit at the table properly so she doesn’t have to sit on her knees and it’s not a “baby chair”<br /> <a href="https://m2.ikea.com/us/en/p/agam-junior-chair-black-70253541/" rel="nofollow">https://m2.ikea.com/us/en/p/agam-junior-chair-black-70253541/</a> </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/table-manner-rules#post-2892165 Wed, 24 Jul 2019 15:00:56 +0000 LadyDi 2892165@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>No toys, tv, or electronics. His butt has to stay on the seat and he has to face forward. DS is 4 but still uses a booster seat (unbuckled) and he does a much better job of sitting still in it. He hardly ever finishes before us but if he does he’s excused from the table unless it’s a special occasion, we have company or if we’re at a restaurant. He also has to clear his plate and cup. </p> <p>Our biggest issue isn’t with manners so much as pacing. He takes incredibly long to eat, so our new rule is that he takes a bite and while he’s chewing he has to get the next bite ready on his fork. It’s helped marginally. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/table-manner-rules#post-2892149 Wed, 24 Jul 2019 13:43:29 +0000 PinkElephant 2892149@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@JennyPenny: We had these, in different color schemes - click around on Target/Walmart/Amazon and you can probably find them for $20 or less. The back (part with the seatbelt) comes off, so they're still useful for guests/your kids when they're not being punished, haha</p> <p><a href="https://www.amazon.com/Graco-Blossom-Booster-Seat-Brown/dp/B01BGVM41O?th=1" rel="nofollow">https://www.amazon.com/Graco-Blossom-Booster-Seat-Brown/dp/B01BGVM41O?th=1</a> </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/table-manner-rules#post-2892148 Wed, 24 Jul 2019 13:40:42 +0000 lilyofthewest 2892148@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Reading this is making me realize how much I owe my older kiddo's daycare ladies. Dinner is always a mad sprint between pickup and bedtime and 4yo is too tired to have high expectations of him. We actually attempt to enforce: No shouting, no feet on the table (why, why, why is this such a problem?), pleases and thank yous, no interrupting (liberally interpreted as interrupt somewhat less and/or less forcefully), beverages are for drinking (not bubbles), please try to use utensils and ask permission to use your hands if utensils are too tricky. </p> <p>Somehow he still manages to behave when we're out...and I know we can't take credit. Thanks, daycare! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/table-manner-rules#post-2892147 Wed, 24 Jul 2019 13:38:56 +0000 Ajsmommy 2892147@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I am way too lax about this.. but dinner time is usually chaotic to say the least by no fault of my kiddos. I wish it were different but 4/7 times a week DH is not home yet. So I am rushing to get dinner made/on the table or reheating premade food while DS (2.5) who is usually starving has a yogurt and drink at the table and DD (5) is relaxing/playing, she will also sometimes have her yogurt and fresh fruit too if she's starving. Then once I get the food made we all sit down to eat. I am big on please and thank you and I like to have some small talk. But I do not make them stay at the table the entire time I am eating, if they are done they can be excused. </p> <p>I think I will start to institute DD picking up her dishes, I haven't done that yet although she picks up after her snacks and other items... just not dinner time. </p> <p>And we are bad in that we tend to leave the TV on which can be seen from the kitchen table. However, we do talk and interact and the tv is like background noise, if you will. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/table-manner-rules#post-2892146 Wed, 24 Jul 2019 13:38:16 +0000 hitchhiker 2892146@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Whatever you decide are your preferred manners, my friend had a great idea that we have implemented to great success at our house. We light tapered candles at dinner, which we call the manners candles. If you have good manners at dinner, you get to blow out the the manners candle. If not, mom and dad get to blow it out. It's pretty decent motivation most days! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/table-manner-rules#post-2892143 Wed, 24 Jul 2019 13:28:33 +0000 JennyPenny 2892143@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Champagne: @PinkElephant: That's what my husband wanted to do but our 2 yr old's booster doesn't have straps, and my 4 year old isn't in one anymore. So recommendations for boosters? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/table-manner-rules#post-2892138 Wed, 24 Jul 2019 13:17:51 +0000 PinkElephant 2892138@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Champagne: This! We went through a period of my older girls being awful about getting up from the table, and I threatened to bring back out booster seats with buckles. We actually did it for my (then) 4.5 year old. She was mortified, and shaped up her behavior pretty quickly.</p> <p>ETA: My kids actually have excellent table manners, aside from the issue we had with them getting up. It's a combination of constant reminders, following through on what we say, and pretty strict rules. I still think they're not great, but other people are super impressed, so I guess we're doing ok! We absolutely do not allow toys or technology at the table, including at restaurants, they're not allowed to say "yuck" to something someone else is eating, they have to try things we've put on their plate that we genuinely believe they will like, they have to eat at least some of everything in order to be finished with their meal (if they want dessert, when it's being offered - we don't force things we know they really hate after a number of times trying it), no potty talk, proper sitting, proper use of utensils, etc....are all required. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/table-manner-rules#post-2892124 Wed, 24 Jul 2019 12:02:34 +0000 Mrs. Champagne 2892124@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@JennyPenny: so my kids (5 and 3) do not sit still. Always getting up and being wild. Sooo I started buckling them in booster seats. I told them when they were good for every meal for a few days in a row (polite, not asking to get down) they could sit back in their regular seats. </p> <p>We are now back in the regular seats, and then still are being a bit devilish. Haha. Drives me a bit crazy. </p> <p>They do have to clear their plates and I should work on better utensil manners too. Sometimes they crawl across the table 🥴 meal time is a gong show over here. I feel ya! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/table-manner-rules#post-2892122 Wed, 24 Jul 2019 11:58:16 +0000 JennyPenny 2892122@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Ok - so sitting in the chair is the biggest struggle with my kids (almost 5 and 2) but I haven't figured out the right strategy to stop it. Telling them that it means dinner is over for them and they have to leave the table just results in the other one deciding they're done too and wanting to leave as well. Though as I'm writing this it doesn't sound as bad as it feels when I'm in it.... so maybe I should just decide to be ok with that happening? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/table-manner-rules#post-2892118 Wed, 24 Jul 2019 11:44:27 +0000 threeplusme 2892118@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Our are very similar to poppygirl15 with the addition that they help set and clear the table, my kiddos are 9,9 and 6. We also have a ritual of sharing our best part of the day and sometimes our worst too. They love this ritual and will remind me if i forget and insist on doing it no matter where we are. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/table-manner-rules#post-2892116 Wed, 24 Jul 2019 11:22:03 +0000 lindseykaye 2892116@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Our main rules are:<br /> Sit in your chair (no getting up and down)<br /> Eat with utensils (not fingers)<br /> Inside voice/minimal craziness<br /> No potty talk/jokes<br /> Even if you are not eating, sit with the family and chat, ask to be excused<br /> In general, no toys/tablet/TV during dinner, but sometimes we make exceptions and always state that it is such<br /> Take your dish to the kitchen when you're done </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/table-manner-rules#post-2892114 Wed, 24 Jul 2019 11:16:22 +0000 LemonJack 2892114@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>They are expected to sit at the table, even if they’re done. Not for a long time, but enough time to be appropriate for their age. So when our younger daughter was maybe 1.5, she would have to stay in her seat an extra 3-5 minutes if we were still eating, then she could get out. They also are expected to bring their plates to the sink when done. That’s about it at home. </p> <p>At a restaurant, they are expected to stay seated and behave appropriately (no yelling, etc). </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/table-manner-rules#post-2892112 Wed, 24 Jul 2019 10:38:58 +0000 KT326 2892112@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm way more lax at home. We all eat dinner together and that is what matters. As long as the goofing off is kept to a minimum and he sits properly in his chair, I really don't care too much about proper manners (other than please and thank you). We really don't go out to eat since we have a 2.5 year old as well, I don't want to deal with toddler antics while dining out! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/table-manner-rules#post-2892111 Wed, 24 Jul 2019 10:33:53 +0000 ALV91711 2892111@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>No hats at the table, use your manners and clear your dishes when you are done. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/table-manner-rules#post-2892110 Wed, 24 Jul 2019 10:11:20 +0000 poppygirl15 2892110@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>No elbows on the table, napkin on your lap. Ask for items to be passed, ask to be excused from the table (whether to go to the bathroom or get something from the fridge). On the rare occasion they finish first, I ask them to stay at the table and chat while everyone else finishes. On the other hand, if they’re not going to eat (don’t like the food), then you get excused from the table. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/table-manner-rules#post-2892094 Wed, 24 Jul 2019 08:20:02 +0000 JennyPenny 2892094@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'd love to hear from everyone what your table manner rules are and how you enforce them. Not food-specific rules like trying everything or eating certain amounts, but behaviors. Like what happens if they can't sit still, or if they want to leave before everyone's done? How is it different at restaurants vs at home?</p> <p>I ask because we never really had a good handle on it and then this past month our kitchen has been under renovations and meals have become so hectic and everything's gotten worse. When we go back to eating at our regular table in (please please please) a week or so, I'd like to have a plan in place to really start fresh. </p>