https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Sun, 10 May 2026 15:15:25 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/waiting-comfort-amp-hope#post-1255211 Tue, 03 Dec 2013 01:22:24 +0000 SunshineMcC 1255211@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Pui: thanks for the suggestion. I haven't heard of that Bible study, but will most definitely look into it! Happy to hear that scripture is helpful for you, too! Blessings and prayers to you! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/waiting-comfort-amp-hope#post-1255141 Mon, 02 Dec 2013 23:09:42 +0000 pui 1255141@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@SunshineMcC: Since you are Christian, have you tried the Bible study "Surviving Infertility" by Sarah's Laughter? I found it extremely helpful. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/waiting-comfort-amp-hope#post-1255138 Mon, 02 Dec 2013 23:05:42 +0000 pui 1255138@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Comfort: Reading scripture, photography, my husband, books, my pup. </p> <p>Hope: Again scripture, my doctors, inspirational quotes (mostly on Pinterest), just a deep down belief that things are going to work out. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/waiting-comfort-amp-hope#post-1255077 Mon, 02 Dec 2013 22:10:37 +0000 SunshineMcC 1255077@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Hi all! </p> <p>At church on Sunday the message was about waiting. How appropriate, right? :) </p> <p>The message was that comfort and hope are two things that can make waiting more bearable for us. I'd love to hear what's been a source of comfort and/or hope for you during this journey?</p> <p>Here are some of mine: </p> <p>Comfort - hot baths, reading my kindle in bed under the covers, putting my pajamas on right when I get home from work (even at 6pm), Skyping with my nephews, deep breaths. </p> <p>Hope - seeing and spending time with little ones, prayer and scripture, inspirational sayings (hello Instagram!) </p> <p>What brings you comfort and hope during your wait? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/im-ready#post-1072134 Sat, 07 Sep 2013 20:23:19 +0000 Circusbee 1072134@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Thanks for all the good advice everyone! I had an opportunity to talk with DH more seriously about it and I think we kind of hashed it out. He wants to be 30 when the baby's born, so we would actively start TTC in April 2015. I'm thinking I will stop BC in January that year. It's not my ideal but I think if he's ok with that plan now, he may change his mind and want to try earlier instead. I would love to go off BC next Summer and ttc September-ish, but that's only a 6 month difference so maybe we will end up somewhere in between. </p> <p>At least he seems to be more open to the idea though! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/im-ready#post-1064726 Wed, 04 Sep 2013 11:54:40 +0000 pui 1064726@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I was ready to have kids before my DH was. If it had been up to me, we would have started trying as soon as we were married. I always told my DH that I wanted to have 2 kids before I was 30, and he thought that meant we would start when we were 28 (!!!) I explained to him that conceiving, pregnancy and the time between kids may be longer than he's calculating, so he finally agreed to start trying when we turned 26.</p> <p>Perhaps talk to your DH about the future? Like, how old does he want to be when your kids are teenagers? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/im-ready#post-1064715 Wed, 04 Sep 2013 11:51:51 +0000 LaughLines 1064715@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My DH is wanting to wait, but he's coming around to the idea of another 6mo-1year. I think he was worried that we would be the "only ones" with a kid out of our friends, but now almost all of our friends are married and some are starting to have kids (also, there's a built in 12ish weeks before they usually "announce"). I think seeing others with kids has really helped, not hurt, so maybe you having some friends with kids will help. The thing that really helped him is seeing said friends with kids actually doing things - like still going to dinner or having people over to watch a game, etc. So maybe make sure you attend events that the new parents will be going to as well so he can see that they still have lives outside of changing diapers all day :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/im-ready#post-1063352 Tue, 03 Sep 2013 19:36:35 +0000 HellOnHeels 1063352@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I can *sort of* relate over here!!</p> <p>I won't go into details, you can check out my posts if you want. I will say this;<br /> When DH and I had our discussion about setting a timeline, he said this, "Putting it off for 'another year' won't really matter. There will always be a reason why we can delay. If we want to have a baby, we gotta just do it. Do I WANT a baby right now? No, not really. But I will and so why wait any longer? We'll figure it out!" </p> <p>I wasn't expecting DH to agree with my timeline, because a few close friends of ours have LO's and, like you, I thought he was freaked out about kids after talking with the other guys. Of course, I freak out too at times, but we don't see us being anymore "ready" to take this on than now (or more specifically, early next year). I also didn't want to make him feel that I was rushing him into something he wasn't ready for at all, and I told him that. He said that I wasn't, that he knew the conversation would be coming soon considering that we'll have been married for almost 2 years and "that's just what people do around this time."</p> <p>I think taking time to really discuss how you're feeling is the way to go right now, and see exactly where he's at. Tell him, you want to make a specific timeline (my DH is very "fly by the seat of his pants" and not really a "timeline" type of guy, and even he was able to agree to one.) and find some middle ground if you're not in agreement. Maybe even say that you'll give him some time to think about it, and then come back to it in a certain amount of time. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/im-ready#post-1063289 Tue, 03 Sep 2013 19:12:12 +0000 Mae 1063289@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Circusbee: I think one thing that really helped was some of his friends having babies. Seeing it 1) not ruin their lives and 2) be "normal" I think helped for him. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/im-ready#post-1063281 Tue, 03 Sep 2013 19:09:42 +0000 Circusbee 1063281@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Thanks for the quick responses!</p> <p>I am 24 and DH is 27. We talked about wanting kids well before we were even engaged, so i know he wants them. He says just not yet. Our closest friends are not even close to that mindet, which I think could be what's putting him off. Many of them are very career-oriented city people, so I wonder if he just thinks he will be missing out on those things. To be honest, though, we don't do much of that anyway! We are really very boring, haha!</p> <p>I think I will put it to bed for a week or two and then just let him know how i feel and that I want him to really think about it, and then hopefully a little after that we can have a more serious conversation. </p> <p>In the meantime, though, my over-planning self has already started my own "just in case" timeline. I am planning to talk to my GYN at my October annual appt. about steps I should be taking during the next year should we decide to TTC next fall. I don't think it would be a mistake to just have the information...</p> <p>@Mae what a Funny story! I have a feeling he will come around quicker than he thinks also, I just have to keep myself from ruining it! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/im-ready#post-1063246 Tue, 03 Sep 2013 18:44:59 +0000 Mae 1063246@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Welcome! I agree with the others that cooling it for a bit then talking to him calmly is probably the best bet. I know for my husband, we had a strange situation because when we met he wanted kids and I didn't. Then I was a little too good at talking about why kids suck and somehow I convinced him. But then I changed my mind... so I wanted them and he didn't! haha. </p> <p>I still wasn't in any hurry so I didn't put pressure on him, but it did sort of worry me that he wasn't sure he wanted them at all and I was sure I did (at some point). Finally I sort of just had an honest talk with him about how this is something I really wanted and I knew he wasn't ready now, but that he needed to start thinking about getting ready and this being a part of our lives. </p> <p>That being known, I told him I thought that we should seriously consider TTC in fall 2014 because that timing worked out well for his school and it was still around 18 months away (lots of time to think of it)... but that we really didn't have to decide for sure until that time came. Then I just dropped it. I feel like having that much time to think/get ready for it was good for him and made him get more on board with the idea. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/im-ready#post-1063210 Tue, 03 Sep 2013 18:28:35 +0000 Rubies 1063210@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Welcome to HB! I'm sorry your DH is putting a damper on your feelings about wanting to start a family. Perhaps, you can let it go for a few weeks and when things are feeling good, you can attempt a healthy conversation about a realistic goal towards starting a family and hopefully he can open up about why he wants to wait a few years. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/im-ready#post-1063204 Tue, 03 Sep 2013 18:25:58 +0000 yoursilverlining 1063204@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Welcome!</p> <p>I know a lot of women on here had to really talk to their husbands to get on board with a timeline, so hopefully they will chime in!</p> <p>How old are you guys? Did you talk about babies or a timeline before getting married? </p> <p>I think maybe the best place to start would be by asking your husband why he wants to wait - are there things in his career he wants to accomplish first, does he feel he is too young, etc. If you guys can address those things head on, maybe he will be more inclined to speed up his version of the baby-timeline!</p> <p>Good luck! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/im-ready#post-1063148 Tue, 03 Sep 2013 17:51:14 +0000 Circusbee 1063148@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Hi all,</p> <p>I'm new to HB, and could use a community of others also sick with baby fever to vent to! There isn't really anyone else I can talk to about this, but it seems like I may be in the right place here.</p> <p>I am thinking about babies 24/7 nowadays! Every time my mind gets focused on something else, another ultrasound pops up on Facebook or something, it just seems to be everywhere. My husband and I have been married 2 years and have now completed the "first steps" as one of my coworkers calls it: we have a dog and we just bought our first house. (and we are now debt-free except the house!) Naturally baby is the next thing on my mind and I happen to be a person who latches on to an idea and doesn't let it go until it happens (hence said dog and house) : )</p> <p>The other day, hubby and I were shopping in target and wander into the baby section oohing and ahing at all the cuteness. We even stopped at the Charlie banana cloth diaper area and I showed him how those work. They were on sale, and I told him how rare it is to see them on sale, and maybe we should just get one, you know, to start a collection. To my surprise, he totally thought about it! We didn't end up getting any, but he was definitely thinking about it, which got me really excited.</p> <p>However, in the last few days since then, I've brought up babies a few times and each time he seems to get more and more angry about it, and insists he won't be ready for a few more years. A FEW!?!? I mean, ONE, ok I get it... But a few?? What does that even mean?? I keep probing him for reasons why, but all I get is "there are just things I'd like to do first" without any other specifics... I know I'm probably making it worse by continually bringing it up, but I really don't want to wait that long! We did just find out 2 different couple friends of ours who are our age are pregnant, so I wonder if he is just freaked out or something. </p> <p>Have any of you gone through this with your partners? Did they come around quicker than you expected? Take longer? Any tips for quietly and gently encouraging him to be a little more comfortable with the idea? I'm not in a super rush, but I'd kinda like to turn the "wait a few years" into a "wait one year" to start trying... </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/interesting-article-on-misconceptions-of-fertility-declining-with-age#post-871964 Thu, 20 Jun 2013 16:25:23 +0000 looch 871964@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I was 34 when we started TTCing. We got pregnant on our first attempt. I had been charting for three years and using opks. As my husband said, when there are problems, they are likely to have been there years ago, but because we weren't trying for a baby then, we never would have known it. </p> <p>So yeah, I don't put a lot of faith in stats. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/interesting-article-on-misconceptions-of-fertility-declining-with-age#post-871910 Thu, 20 Jun 2013 16:09:32 +0000 LovelyPlum 871910@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I saw this article, and I wondered what some of the other bees would think of it. Not sure... </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/interesting-article-on-misconceptions-of-fertility-declining-with-age#post-871780 Thu, 20 Jun 2013 15:40:16 +0000 NorCalWayfarer 871780@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@lioneyes: I just posted on this too! Really interesting article. Not sure how I feel about it as I'm still in the TTC camp...</p> <p>Thanks for posting :-) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/interesting-article-on-misconceptions-of-fertility-declining-with-age#post-871764 Thu, 20 Jun 2013 15:37:41 +0000 lioneyes 871764@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Saw this article and thought I should share:</p> <p><a href="http://www.theatlantic.com/magazine/archive/2013/07/how-long-can-you-wait-to-have-a-baby/309374/?single_page=true" rel="nofollow">http://www.theatlantic.com/magazine/archive/2013/07/how-long-can-you-wait-to-have-a-baby/309374/?single_page=true</a></p> <p>Apparently, there are a lot of misconceptions about fertility declining with age. Thought it was an interesting read. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-want-a-baaaaaby#post-328510 Sat, 06 Oct 2012 14:07:08 +0000 daniellemybelle 328510@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My baby fever goes into remission for long stretches, and I will be so glad we're not TTC yet. And then - BAM. It hits me and there is no reasoning with me.</p> <p>We are helpless against our biological drive to continue the human race, it seems. :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-want-a-baaaaaby#post-327795 Fri, 05 Oct 2012 15:34:51 +0000 BSB 327795@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Yeah. I want a baby right now and I feel like a bad person when I feel any jealousy around my pregnant friends or friends who just gave birth. </p> <p>I'm trying really hard to look at the perks of not TTC and waiting a year but sometimes it's really hard. </p> <p>It is harder to bond with some of my pregnant or mommy friends because of my jealousy and I feel bad for being such a crappy friend. It's just so much harder to talk babies when you can't have babies. :( Plus knowing that we were TTC for 8 months with no BFP made me a little bitter. </p> <p>How do I stop being that way? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-want-a-baaaaaby#post-327758 Fri, 05 Oct 2012 15:09:54 +0000 JennyLayneAZ 327758@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I have serious baby fever. Have had it for the last year or so. All of my friends already have babies though, so no pregnancies around me (well my cousin but she lives in a different state so I don't see her every week LOL). We just aren't in a comfortable spot financially right now. And we're getting married in December. And I feel like I'm rambling too LOL </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-want-a-baaaaaby#post-327707 Fri, 05 Oct 2012 14:48:54 +0000 dc yoga bee 327707@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Meee. I just graduated law school, took the bar, and am waiting on a job and bar results. I just started a paid fellowship with a law firm, and now my baby fever is creeping back up! We want to start ttc after we've been married for a year (Mar), and I don't want to be pregnant in a wedding I"m in next summer. Ideally, I'll have a full-time job by next summer, and then we can throw caution to the wind. Because right now, a paid fellowship isn't enough cushion to feel comfortable ttc. But, I have fertility worries (which may or may not be substantiated), so who knows if there's ever a "right time." It may take me 2yrs to get a job! Gah, I'm rambling! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-want-a-baaaaaby#post-327646 Fri, 05 Oct 2012 14:09:50 +0000 MrsBrewer 327646@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Agree!! I've had like 4 people on facebook announce in the last month or two....:-( </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-want-a-baaaaaby#post-327626 Fri, 05 Oct 2012 14:03:43 +0000 annie624 327626@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I agree! I have baby fever in a bad, bad way. However DH doesn't even want to talk about it at this point :( But FB is exploding with baby announcements, it's crazy! Every day in my newsfeed I see where like eight or nine of my friends posted from "Baby Gaga." </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-want-a-baaaaaby#post-264091 Sun, 19 Aug 2012 21:09:14 +0000 marionberry 264091@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>This is totally me! I've been TTC for five months now and everyone around me (it seems, but that's over amplified I'm sure) has been announcing they're pregnant. Now one of my best friends just got married and I feel like I'm in a race with her, and another friend will start trying in January. I feel like if things continue as they have been, they'll all be pregnant and I'll still be waiting. Not to mention my sister-in-law is pregnant too and my mom's on me to have a kid, but I don't want to talk to her about my struggles. I would kill for a baby...crossing my fingers maybe my luck will change and I'll get to POAS at the end of the month.</p> <p>To all of you who think about waiting, I'd say there is no time to wait. You may end up like me and it can take forever, and if you get lucky with a baby right away, there's nothing to be upset about. A baby is such a gift! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-want-a-baaaaaby#post-263610 Sun, 19 Aug 2012 01:57:22 +0000 Mrs squirreld 263610@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@SweetMamaM: heheh glad i'm not alone!! :-) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-want-a-baaaaaby#post-263605 Sun, 19 Aug 2012 01:41:03 +0000 SweetMamaM 263605@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Hanzabelle: totally love baby showers, love planning them too! Only co-planning one of the three upcoming showers but loving the opportunity to go baby gear shopping and the chance to oooh and aaah over little baby clothes. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-want-a-baaaaaby#post-263602 Sun, 19 Aug 2012 01:32:00 +0000 Mrs squirreld 263602@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@SweetMamaM: yaaaay hope all goes well at the end of the year for you! I totally LOVE baby showers... is that weird? Everyone seems to groan at them.... lol </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-want-a-baaaaaby#post-263601 Sun, 19 Aug 2012 01:30:51 +0000 Mrs squirreld 263601@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@bluestriped bee: awww :-( ... I totally agree with @SweetMamaM: though.. your relationship is definately what you should be focusing on...a warm nest for a little one to be brought into. Fertility problems must be so hard to deal with ontop of that so my hat goes off to you for being so strong! Goodluck with everything - you'll be swimming in no time!! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-want-a-baaaaaby#post-263600 Sun, 19 Aug 2012 01:08:23 +0000 SweetMamaM 263600@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@bluestriped bee: awww that really sucks that you ran into some relationship issues but FWIW I think you are doing the right thing mending your relationship. I think you can never know what is going on behind closed doors so those friends who have kids may have other problems you can't see and wouldn't envy them if you could. </p>