https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Fri, 01 May 2026 21:40:28 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/25yo-seeing-ghosts-an-active-imagination-or-just-stalling-bedtime#post-2270058 Fri, 21 Aug 2015 18:15:18 +0000 rosegold 2270058@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@littlebug: i just feel like a child shouldn't have to go through figuring out if they think they're seeing a ghost or shadow. as adults we can shrug that argument off and think about it later or have our own opinions or keep that all very private. a child relies on you for what's what when it comes to fear and confidence. to me it is not the same as imaginative play. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/25yo-seeing-ghosts-an-active-imagination-or-just-stalling-bedtime#post-2269784 Fri, 21 Aug 2015 12:51:12 +0000 littlebug 2269784@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@rosegold: I don't really ant to start telling him that he's not seeing what he thinks he's seeing. That's like telling a kid that's pretending he's a pirate and is playing with buried treasure, "No, kid, you're just a regular little kid and that's a pile of Legos." I don't necessarily want to encourage seeing ghosts, but it's more important to me to validate what he's feeling. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/25yo-seeing-ghosts-an-active-imagination-or-just-stalling-bedtime#post-2269770 Fri, 21 Aug 2015 12:40:18 +0000 dagret 2269770@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@littlebug: L just started telling me "I'm afraid of the shadows" at bedtime so maybe this is a normal developmental thing, paired with it being darker at bedtime? Bc they're almost the same age... </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/25yo-seeing-ghosts-an-active-imagination-or-just-stalling-bedtime#post-2269705 Fri, 21 Aug 2015 11:55:56 +0000 rosegold 2269705@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>i definitely believe in FIRST trying to push that all these scary monsters (encouraged by things on media) don't exist. no matter your own spiritual beliefs. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/25yo-seeing-ghosts-an-active-imagination-or-just-stalling-bedtime#post-2269533 Fri, 21 Aug 2015 10:10:49 +0000 BabyBoecksMom 2269533@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@littlebug: Oh that's such good news! I hope it keeps up!! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/25yo-seeing-ghosts-an-active-imagination-or-just-stalling-bedtime#post-2269394 Fri, 21 Aug 2015 08:24:43 +0000 TemperanceBrennan 2269394@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@littlebug: That's great news! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/25yo-seeing-ghosts-an-active-imagination-or-just-stalling-bedtime#post-2269357 Fri, 21 Aug 2015 07:59:06 +0000 littlebug 2269357@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>So I wanted to come back and give a little update. On Wednesday night, after bath and before getting pjs on, we sprayed the "ghost" with Febreze and clapped our hands and yelled, "Go away, Ghost!" for a few minutes. He had a lot of fun yelling at it, and after a couple of minutes he said, "All gone! Ghost went home!" We talked about the ghost leaving and going back to it's home. I asked if he felt better an he said, "Yup!" After reading our books, I turned off his lamp and he climbed into bed, but he looked a little scared again, so I asked if he was ok. He said no, so we clapped and yelled one more time and I turned the lamp on to the dimmest setting. He fell asleep shortly after I left the room and STTN.</p> <p>Last night we clapped and yelled again after bath, and I left the lamp on the dimmest setting when he laid down. He fell asleep while I was singing to him and he STTN.</p> <p>Hopefully we've tackled the ghost issue! I'll keep you all posted if it changes again. Thank you all so much for your insight and suggestions! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/25yo-seeing-ghosts-an-active-imagination-or-just-stalling-bedtime#post-2267756 Thu, 20 Aug 2015 02:17:51 +0000 shopaholic 2267756@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@littlebug: Man, this kind of stuff freaks me out! But then again, I'm a believer and I think kids usually can see things adults can't. We have family that the mom &amp; her sisters all say they can see ghosts. Never mentioned it once to the kids, but her twins both separately mentioned a couple of ghosts [they said "men"], could describe them, etc. around 2-3 y/o. I mean, I freaked out when she told me this! Well, the aunties had seen the same ones apparently! The mom didn't want to scare them - but lets just say they moved rooms shortly after! Would it be possible to let him sleep in a different room or in your room for awhile (maybe in a PnP or something) and see if things change? I know at this age stall tactics come in many forms (and we've been dealing with some too!), but it sounds like he is legitimately terrified and something is consistently bothering him from the same place in the room. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/25yo-seeing-ghosts-an-active-imagination-or-just-stalling-bedtime#post-2267136 Wed, 19 Aug 2015 13:23:14 +0000 littlebug 2267136@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@jh524: Yeah, I've been careful with what he watches, as well. He doesn't watch anything scary. He watches Daniel Tiger and some Disney movies. But I'm super careful about what he watches because he DOES have a steel-trap memory. I can't think of a single thing he would have watched that had ghosts in it. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/25yo-seeing-ghosts-an-active-imagination-or-just-stalling-bedtime#post-2267122 Wed, 19 Aug 2015 13:05:49 +0000 jh524 2267122@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@littlebug: whoa! My 2 yr old doesn't know what a ghost is. I've been very careful about not letting him watch anything scary. Maybe limit his "scary" tv shows? Sorry mommy this sounds really hard! I have no doubt he's probably dreaming something scary, poor little guy! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/25yo-seeing-ghosts-an-active-imagination-or-just-stalling-bedtime#post-2267115 Wed, 19 Aug 2015 13:02:10 +0000 Mamaof2 2267115@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@littlebug: sounds like maybe he had a bad dream since it happened in the middle of the night.</p> <p>Both of my kids have been scared of something at bedtime.</p> <p>For my DD it was an easy - lets looks under the bed - all clear, lets look in the closet - all clear - lets look behind the curtain - all clear and she would go to bed.</p> <p>DS was and still is a little tougher. He didn't buy into any of the sprays or checking for them. He was scared and to be honest I slept in his room one night and heard things too so yeah...... anyway he is almost 7 and still falls asleep with a light on - once asleep I turn it off and he STTN. I figure if it makes him feel better to have the light on then I'll leave it on for as long as he needs it. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/25yo-seeing-ghosts-an-active-imagination-or-just-stalling-bedtime#post-2267044 Wed, 19 Aug 2015 12:06:18 +0000 Raindrop 2267044@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My kid has always suffered from night terrors since he was a newborn - I have been told he has an overactive imagination and now that he talks a lot I can totally see that he does. </p> <p>For us what works is we don't try to over simulate him during the day... we know days that are too fun or exciting we are going to have a night terror night. Usually one of us just sleeps with him that night because we know we will have to get up anyways to comfort him and usually for him if he wakes up scared and feels that one of us is with him he clams down and falls back asleep. Well that's how we deal with it.</p> <p>Try to think back on the days that he wakes up scared... are they days you did something new or extra fun? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/25yo-seeing-ghosts-an-active-imagination-or-just-stalling-bedtime#post-2267036 Wed, 19 Aug 2015 12:00:28 +0000 MamaCate 2267036@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@littlebug: I think that fears like this are common at this age and something likely did prompt the initial reaction in the middle of the night. I think it might be important to meet him on his level on this--he thinks he saw a ghost and now he is scared. I think one thing I would try is to help him feel equipped to deal with the ghosts, like using the spray or practicing telling the ghosts to go away. My LO sometimes stalls by talking about monsters and she thinks it is funny when we shout with our "brave voices" to tell them to go away. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/25yo-seeing-ghosts-an-active-imagination-or-just-stalling-bedtime#post-2267017 Wed, 19 Aug 2015 11:51:05 +0000 littlejoy 2267017@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@littlebug: Our house is 100+ years old, so I was reallllyyyy nervous about the history. We asked the owners if they thought it was haunted. She assured me it felt very "empty" ... But if my 2.5 year old was saying there was a ghost, I'd probably lose my shit. Haha. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/25yo-seeing-ghosts-an-active-imagination-or-just-stalling-bedtime#post-2267011 Wed, 19 Aug 2015 11:48:38 +0000 littlebug 2267011@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@littlejoy: I've always been a skeptical believer, so I don't completely doubt it... I did ask our neighbor if he'd ever heard of anything happening in our house, like maybe an elderly person passing away or something. He didn't know of anything. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/25yo-seeing-ghosts-an-active-imagination-or-just-stalling-bedtime#post-2267009 Wed, 19 Aug 2015 11:46:48 +0000 littlejoy 2267009@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@littlebug: Does any part of you think it's true? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/25yo-seeing-ghosts-an-active-imagination-or-just-stalling-bedtime#post-2266965 Wed, 19 Aug 2015 11:16:46 +0000 littlebug 2266965@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@littlejoy: We have his 2.5 year well-child visit next weeks, so I'll definitely bring it up with the ped. He's in daycare, but he's in a class with all 2-year-olds. I think they're very rarely with older kids; MAYBE out on the playground, but I think they do a pretty good job of keeping the age groups separated. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/25yo-seeing-ghosts-an-active-imagination-or-just-stalling-bedtime#post-2266960 Wed, 19 Aug 2015 11:12:42 +0000 littlebug 2266960@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@noelani: That's why I offered to "spray" the ghost last night. I was just going to get some Febreeze and call it Ghost Spray and spray the curtain or something. He might go for something like what you're suggesting, though. Make it a little more fun and involve him in it.</p> <p>I did try to talk to him about the ghost last night - I asked him to point to where he sees it, tell me what it looks like... but he wouldn't talk. I swear it was like he was afraid to piss it off or something! Especially when he started screaming "No no no!" when I offered to spray it! So weird. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/25yo-seeing-ghosts-an-active-imagination-or-just-stalling-bedtime#post-2266933 Wed, 19 Aug 2015 10:50:53 +0000 littlejoy 2266933@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Yikes. I would move. Haha. </p> <p>What kind of exposure to other older kids does he have? I mean, I feel like the ghosts in the book can't possibly be the reference that's making him think "ghost" right?? Or maybe kids have steel traps for memories?? </p> <p>I really like the idea that @noelani: shared about talking to him about the "ghost". </p> <p>His doctor might have some advice too. I assume this is pretty common. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/25yo-seeing-ghosts-an-active-imagination-or-just-stalling-bedtime#post-2266919 Wed, 19 Aug 2015 10:42:16 +0000 Truth Bombs 2266919@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>The fact that the initial incident happened in the middle of the night as opposed to bed time makes me think he's definitely legit scared. I would probably just keep prompting him, asking him what he's scared of and what you can do to make him feel more comfortable and let him take the lead. Listen to his fears without reinforcing them. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/25yo-seeing-ghosts-an-active-imagination-or-just-stalling-bedtime#post-2266890 Wed, 19 Aug 2015 10:09:37 +0000 noelani 2266890@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@littlebug: A few months ago my 2.5 yr old started complaining at bedtime that a monster was biting his toes at night. </p> <p>I tried to engage him in a conversation about the monster in sort of a light-hearted, no big deal sort of way - and I tried to "humanize" the monster by asking questions about him (what's the monster's name? What's his favorite food? Does he share his toys with his friends?) and by saying that the monster probably just wanted to go home to his mommy and daddy to eat dinner and go night-night. We also made a big production out of saying "No thank you, monster! Eat your OWN toes!!" and doing sort of a drumroll with our hands in the corner where DS said he'd seen the monster. This usually made DS laugh by the end of our routine. </p> <p>Your little guy sounds truly scared, which makes the situation much harder to deal with (as opposed to my little guy who is a gold medalist in stalling). So I don't know if our approach would be effective but maybe worth a shot? It sounds like you're doing all the right things, being comforting and providing nightlights. Bedtime phases are so tough. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/25yo-seeing-ghosts-an-active-imagination-or-just-stalling-bedtime#post-2266887 Wed, 19 Aug 2015 10:02:42 +0000 littlebug 2266887@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@regberadaisy: Yeah, I think turning the overhead light off signifies that it's time to wind down and go to bed. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/25yo-seeing-ghosts-an-active-imagination-or-just-stalling-bedtime#post-2266873 Wed, 19 Aug 2015 09:51:07 +0000 regberadaisy 2266873@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@littlebug: why not? Do you think he won't fall asleep? It will get rid of the shadows. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/25yo-seeing-ghosts-an-active-imagination-or-just-stalling-bedtime#post-2266868 Wed, 19 Aug 2015 09:49:05 +0000 littlebug 2266868@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@regberadaisy: I don't know that I'd want to leave the overhead light on, but he does have a dimmable table lamp that we could try to keep on for a bit. </p> <p>Now that I think about it, this has gotten worse as the days have become noticeably shorter - it is actually dusk now at bedtime, whereas just a week or so ago it was still pretty much daylight outside. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/25yo-seeing-ghosts-an-active-imagination-or-just-stalling-bedtime#post-2266860 Wed, 19 Aug 2015 09:45:26 +0000 regberadaisy 2266860@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@littlebug: what about leaving the lights on? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/25yo-seeing-ghosts-an-active-imagination-or-just-stalling-bedtime#post-2266858 Wed, 19 Aug 2015 09:43:28 +0000 littlebug 2266858@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>He has curtains, and though we don't use a ceiling fan, we do use an oscillating table fan on the floor. The fan doesn't really hit the curtain that he usually says the ghost is at, but maybe there is some movement there anyway. His white noise machine has a nightlight on it that we keep on through the night, and we also turn the Twilight Turtle on at bedtime, which provides some additional light. The curtains on his windows are blackout curtains, so no light is getting in from outside except maybe a little bit around the edges. </p> <p>Last night at bedtime I sat there and watched that corner for a minute to see if I could see anything that might be causing him to be scared, but nothing really jumped out at me (no pun intended). I suppose we could add another nightlight in the room? I don't really know what else to do other than try to make him as comfortable as possible and wait this out as another weird bedtime phase. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/25yo-seeing-ghosts-an-active-imagination-or-just-stalling-bedtime#post-2266850 Wed, 19 Aug 2015 09:34:53 +0000 BabyBoecksMom 2266850@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Poor guy! Has he seen a TV show that would have said something about ghosts? </p> <p>I agree with @TemperanceBrennan: I think he saw a shadow and his brain associated it with a ghost. Do you have a curtain over the window? Does his window face the street? I know a friend of mine's son was kept getting scared when cars passing their house at night because the lights from the cars would shine through the window and make "shadows" on the walls that looked like they moved. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/25yo-seeing-ghosts-an-active-imagination-or-just-stalling-bedtime#post-2266822 Wed, 19 Aug 2015 09:24:14 +0000 regberadaisy 2266822@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think likely it's a shadow created by something in his room that's manifesting into a "ghost" in his head. Does he have a ceiling fan that you leave on?<br /> My daughter went through a stage too where she was scared of the shadows in her room. But we have never read any stories about ghosts or talked about them. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/25yo-seeing-ghosts-an-active-imagination-or-just-stalling-bedtime#post-2266813 Wed, 19 Aug 2015 09:18:13 +0000 mrsrain 2266813@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Hmm... sounds like he is legit scared, so I am guessing he saw a shadow or something. Does he have curtains in his room? A night light? If not, maybe making some simple changes like that would help him feel more secure. How old is he? If he is old enough, maybe you can ask him what you can do to help him feel better at night.</p> <p>EDIT: Just saw the age in the title, so I guess it could go either way. Another suggestion would be to play some soft music or an audio book at bedtime? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/25yo-seeing-ghosts-an-active-imagination-or-just-stalling-bedtime#post-2266799 Wed, 19 Aug 2015 09:05:13 +0000 littlebug 2266799@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@charlotte: So LAST Halloween we were reading the book "Goodnight Goon," which is a Halloween spoof on "Goodnight Moon." In the book the little monster says goodnight to some ghosts, but they're like sheet-ghosts, not transparent-person-shaped-ghosts, if you know what I mean. To my knowledge, he's not watched or read anything else that references a ghost. He's got a steel trap for a memory, but I'd be really surprised if he was all of a sudden talking about something we read almost a year ago! </p>