https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Wed, 22 Apr 2026 09:08:25 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/4-year-old-tantrums/page/2#post-2790312 Wed, 06 Dec 2017 10:56:55 +0000 Finfan 2790312@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My kid was the same at 4 and at 5 has just been diagnosed with adhd. Her “tantrums” are because of a lack of impulse control. Taking stuff away from her only makes things worse. What does work is a lot of empathy and teaching her to work through her feelings. She was always better at preschool than at home because she would hold her intense feelings in at school and then just explode at home. </p> <p>So we are very glad we started therapy through a referral from our pediatrician’s office. Not ridiculous at all to seek professional help. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/4-year-old-tantrums#post-2790203 Tue, 05 Dec 2017 15:21:27 +0000 littlebug 2790203@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs D: To piggyback on @Truth Bombs: @lawbee11: and give some personal experience. After D had the outburst that I described in my post above where he slammed his head into his cubby at school, I called our pediatrician and said that I was concerned. They gave me some referrals to some local child therapists. We saw a therapist once or twice a month for about 5 months. I think between his meetings with Miss Jamie and our work with his teacher at school (and the troublesome staff member at school being removed), it really helped him. We also read books about anger and emotions and had a lot of conversations about what to do when he feels angry or overwhelmed. But D really liked going to see Miss Jamie, his therapist. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/4-year-old-tantrums#post-2790197 Tue, 05 Dec 2017 14:55:40 +0000 pwnstar 2790197@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs D: I agree with @Truth Bombs: and @lawbee11: . Your LO's behavior seems extreme. Sure, every little has their days--don't we all--but the repeated hitting and yelling at you is troubling. I don't see any downside to getting a referral/seeing someone; everyone needs more/different tools from time to time. </p> <p>I'm sorry you are dealing with this; my mama heart bruises pretty easily, and it breaks my heart to think that the two of you are trying to communicate with each other--and just want to love/be loved--but haven't been able to connect. There is no shame/harm in asking for help. More of us should do it more often. :heart: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/4-year-old-tantrums#post-2790189 Tue, 05 Dec 2017 14:12:36 +0000 lawbee11 2790189@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I tend to agree with @Truth Bombs. I think tantrums at 4-years-old are completely normal and to be expected. But stuff like this: "When I told her no she went bonkers. She hit me so many times...I was a crying mess - my sweet little girl chasing me around the house hitting me and yelling that I was a bad mommy" seems really, really extreme. </p> <p>My daughter was having issues at school about a year ago during rest time. We tried several things that didn't work so after a couple of weeks we took her to the ped for suggestions, and he gave us a lot of good tips and confirmed that while frustrating her behavior was totally in the range of normal. It ended up resolving itself a couple of weeks later but I don't regret taking her to see him and legit see no downside to seeking professional help. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/4-year-old-tantrums#post-2790182 Tue, 05 Dec 2017 13:54:48 +0000 hilsy85 2790182@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Anagram: Love your approach, and I find that something similar works really well with my intense, sensitive, spirited now- 5 year old. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/4-year-old-tantrums#post-2790170 Tue, 05 Dec 2017 13:19:15 +0000 Truth Bombs 2790170@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs D: I'm going to be the dissenter and say I agree with your husband that I would want to see someone. Four is a really hard age with a lot of acting out and power struggles. My daughter turned 5 recently and she and I have certainly had our battles. That being said, on her worst day, I could never imagine her chasing me around to hit me, or breaking things purposefully, and it's not behavior I could imagine any of her friends exhibiting either. So, in my experience, her reactions seem extreme. And honestly, what's the down side of seeing someone? If they tell you she's well within the spectrum of normal behavior, and give you some tips to help manage the outbursts, that's great and all you gave up was an hour of your time. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/4-year-old-tantrums#post-2790120 Tue, 05 Dec 2017 11:41:48 +0000 Revel 2790120@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I could have almost written this, although our main trigger currently is when you don't do something the way she wants. We had easier 2s and then tougher 3s and the first half of four has been rough! I did not expect it to be this hard.</p> <p>I will say that we just crossed to 4 and a half and I'm seeing little flashes where instead of the tantrum she will squeeze out words about what we've done "wrong," so there may be a light at the end of the tunnel!</p> <p>She is so well behaved at school, my theory isn't that we are so inconsistent with consequences but that she's more comfortable at home to deal with these big feelings she's having. </p> <p>Like a PP said, I've also been trying to talk to her when she's calm and say something like, "when you get uspet like you did earlier, what can I/we do differently." We haven't come up with any real solutions from these conversations but I think it may help her to get in the habit of thinking about it for when she's a bit older. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/4-year-old-tantrums#post-2790118 Tue, 05 Dec 2017 11:30:20 +0000 gingerbebe 2790118@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs D: I also wanted to add that something I read that really relieved me about parenting a toddler (and god, I will try to find the source of it) is that during the toddler years, the PARENT is shooting for consistent boundaries and discipline, but "success" based on that consistency is somewhere in the 65% compliance range. That made me feel so much better - that if my kid is cooperating 2 out of 3 times, or 2 out of 3 days, or 2 out of 3 weeks, or 2 out of 3 months, we're #winning and ahead of the game. And this is like an overall average - meaning there will be sunny periods where your kid is a peach and days when your kid is a monster, but again, if our kid is being a reasonable human being 2/3 of the time, we're doing great. 100% compliance is not developmentally appropriate, but setting that bar and getting it to stick most of the time is going to pay dividends down the road. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/4-year-old-tantrums#post-2790105 Tue, 05 Dec 2017 10:42:28 +0000 Anagram 2790105@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Circling back to this thread--here's the book I was talking about. Ever since I read "How to talk so LITTLE kids will listen, and listen so little kids will talk", (there's a version for older kids as well)and then read this book--both the way I teach and parent have radically changed.</p> <p>Well, I mean....my PHILOSOPHY behind how I teach and parent has changed. I only have about a 30-40% success rate in cooling myself down and employing these tactics. It's radically different from what I did before, which was basically following the model I was raised with--threats (usually unfulfilled), threats, time outs, consequences unrelated to actions. But I've been having a lot of success with these methods and they are really fairly simple.</p> <p>Read some of the reviews. </p> <p> <a href="https://www.amazon.com/Peaceful-Parent-Happy-Kids-Connecting/dp/0399160280" rel="nofollow">https://www.amazon.com/Peaceful-Parent-Happy-Kids-Connecting/dp/0399160280</a></p> <p>eta: And this one changed my life (seriously) last year. <a href="https://www.amazon.com/Talk-Little-Kids-Will-Listen/dp/150113163X/ref=pd_sim_14_5?_encoding=UTF8&#038;psc=1&#038;refRID=QSDJPRAWN8QED6DPENPB" rel="nofollow">https://www.amazon.com/Talk-Little-Kids-Will-Listen/dp/150113163X/ref=pd_sim_14_5?_encoding=UTF8&#038;psc=1&#038;refRID=QSDJPRAWN8QED6DPENPB</a></p> <p>This one is my next: <a href="https://www.amazon.com/Siblings-Without-Rivalry-Children-Together/dp/0393342212/ref=pd_sim_14_3?_encoding=UTF8&#038;psc=1&#038;refRID=4D27TABZTMVZR5SVSZ9A" rel="nofollow">https://www.amazon.com/Siblings-Without-Rivalry-Children-Together/dp/0393342212/ref=pd_sim_14_3?_encoding=UTF8&#038;psc=1&#038;refRID=4D27TABZTMVZR5SVSZ9A</a> </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/4-year-old-tantrums#post-2790084 Tue, 05 Dec 2017 09:33:58 +0000 ktdid23 2790084@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I am not one for parenting books..... but around the time my daughter was 3.5/4 years old (she's 7 now) I read "1,2,3... MAGIC!" and it really helped us. A lot. At this point I don't typically have to count - like, ever - but if I do I always only get to 1. I haven't counted to 2 in years. I would highly recommend reading it, having your partner read it, and then implementing it. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/4-year-old-tantrums#post-2790078 Tue, 05 Dec 2017 09:19:58 +0000 SweetiePie 2790078@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Adira: Yes good point. If the tantrum results in harmful actions he gets a timeout. But I specify that it’s for hitting, kicking, etc. during the tantrum, not for the actual tantrum.<br /> And based on that, it does sound like I would be giving timeouts as a result of @MrsD:’s daughters tantrums (like today for hitting mommy). </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/4-year-old-tantrums#post-2790076 Tue, 05 Dec 2017 09:00:17 +0000 Adira 2790076@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@SweetiePie: Agree with you about the reason for timeouts - we don't get them for tantrums either - tantrums are normal and a way for kids to work through their emotions! They are annoying, but we usually just ignore tantrums unless they are being violent DURING the tantrum - then it's the violence that earns them the timeout, not the tantrum itself. We do the same thing as you - giving timeouts for repeated disobedience, violence, and intentional meanness. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/4-year-old-tantrums#post-2790068 Tue, 05 Dec 2017 08:21:45 +0000 SweetiePie 2790068@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs D: I just want to echo everything @gingerbebe: said in her last post. I don’t think you’re doing anything wrong. Yes she may be seeking attention but not because you’re not giving it to her. She maybe just wants more than is possible and that is hard for her to understand but there’s nothing you’re doing wrong. </p> <p>Also want to echo @Adria: on how she implements timeout. We do it the exact same way and it’s pretty effective. Consistency is key and now the threat of it is enough most of the time. When he does go we ask if he understand why and he usually does and will say “it’s because I threw my car”. I explain that he can’t do that and why. Then I tell him I love him and ask for a hug. And he is usually super lovey after that. BUT it did take a little time for the timeout to stick. Now he won’t attempt to leave our spot because he knows I will put him back over and over until the timer goes off. And I don’t engage with him. I just silently put him back. Ignore during the timeout. Then the explanation and love/reassurance. </p> <p>Also sort of agree though that tantrums aren’t always a reason for a timeout. We try to use the timeout as a punishment for a distinct wrongdoing. Such as repeated disobedience (not tantrum but just flat out refusing to take off shoes, for example, and running away when we try), hitting, name calling (in a mean spirited way), etc. Of course I’m not perfect and I’m sure I’ve given him a timeout when it wasn’t so warranted. We’re all human and trying to figure this out as we go. </p> <p>And lastly I want to give reassurance that I also do the OK to Wake clock and my 3yo (was 3 in sept) understands it and will quietly wait in bed until it turns green. I think it’s one of those things that will work wonders for some kids and not for others. Clearly some PP upthread have a kid who it doesn’t work for. But there are plenty it does work for and I don’t think it’s developmentally inappropriate. It works for some and not for others, that’s it. So I don’t want you to feel bad or second guess it if it mostly works for you. I think consistency also matters. Like we got it and I will walk him back to his room if he comes out before it’s green. His is set for 7am. If it is 6:50 and the light is red I will walk him back and say he has to wait till it’s green. We also briefly did a treat for waiting till it was green, but it was something that he’s not going to get forever. He got a Hershey kiss. Haha. He doesn’t even ask for it anymore but it helped to positively reinforce the clock. Now he’s just very proud if he waits till it’s green which is 6/7 mornings a week. And he just runs in saying his light is green and wants to show us. </p> <p>Anyway. A lot of this isn’t directly related to your original post since I don’t have a 4yo. But just wanted to help and encourage where I can. :heart: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/4-year-old-tantrums#post-2790056 Tue, 05 Dec 2017 01:08:49 +0000 ALV91711 2790056@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>4 is hard. You've gotten lots of good advice. I'm hoping that things can only get better as we leave 4. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/4-year-old-tantrums#post-2790005 Mon, 04 Dec 2017 17:06:44 +0000 Mama Bird 2790005@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Well first of all, if she's behaving in school, it sounds normal. Very hard, but normal. The kids I know who needed professional intervention could not keep it together anywhere - home or school. It does sound like something is making her temper worse though - maybe she needs more sleep then she's getting, maybe it's the TV time, maybe she's sick or stressed at school... </p> <p>Second of all, this sounds like DD and I'm kind of terrified. She's a sweetheart and very reasonable 90% of the time, but when she's mad about not getting her way she hits, and destroys whatever she can get her hands on. She's only 2, so if this is going to get worse it will be a rough ride. The thing that sort of helps her snap out of it is she's crazy about fashion. If I dangle something shiny in front of her, or let her borrow my scarf or gloves, sometimes it redirects her enough that she forgets she was angry. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/4-year-old-tantrums#post-2789998 Mon, 04 Dec 2017 16:35:27 +0000 Foodnerd81 2789998@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs D: my four year old can be a complete terror as well. God knows I don’t know what I’m doing, but I will say when she completely loses her mind in a tantrum, the best way for me to reach her is sitting with just her, the two of us alone in a room, and she holds me hands and looks at me as we practice taking deep breaths, or sometimes I need to hold her in my lap with my arms holding her arms down in a bear hug and make her feel my deep breaths. Of course if she has reached that point, I’m usually very worked up too. In that case I try to tell her I need a time out too and will come in and sit with her after I calm down. The problem is often that I also have to care for her younger sister (and the attention seeking because I was doing something for sister is often the start of the problem to begin with...)</p> <p>Also- We also require her to stay in her room until her clock lights up unless she has to use the bathroom. She rarely does but if we give a Little she starts getting up earlier and earlier and more often during the night. It’s an ongoing battle and frankly sleep is awful in this house. But letting her come into our room any time day or night is not going to work in our family. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/4-year-old-tantrums#post-2789978 Mon, 04 Dec 2017 15:23:06 +0000 2littlepumpkins 2789978@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>First, if you know she isn't doing this at school it could be just that she is holding it together as much as she can during the school day and then it comes out at home... which is normal! I know that's not helpful in a practical sense but we definitely experienced an uptick in tantrums and whining when our dd went from half days of preschool to summer break to elementary school, and your dd's hours are longer than that too (although I'm assuming there's some kind of rest time and it's not as intense as elementary.) But it is normal and average for kids to lose it at home but not at school.</p> <p>I know you said she didn't have tv that day, but I have found with both my five and two year old that too much screen time over an extended period really messes with their behavior. We currently try to save screen time for evenings when everyone's getting ready for the next day. So that may be one thing that helps. Our kiddos top out at about an hour daily before their attitudes need adjusting!! Being outdoors helps- maybe she doesn't need it on weekdays but definitely on weekends. Even just letting them out in the yard to play independently makes a huge difference in our household.</p> <p>Also, I know everyone has an opinion about time out, but if it's not working, maybe replace it with something else. It may be that she is looking for more attention. For us we have tried to be very clear about what is ok and what isn't. Expressing emotions is allowed, crying is allowed, but anything that could hurt someone else, screaming *at* us, or breaking things will result in a consequence depending on what she does. </p> <p>Sorry you're going through this. I really do think it will pass! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/4-year-old-tantrums#post-2789955 Mon, 04 Dec 2017 14:29:09 +0000 Adira 2789955@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs D: You could always just reach out to your pediatrician and ask if her behavior is normal. Most likely you'll hear a resounding YES and then hopefully that would alleviate your husband's concerns. Then you're striking a compromise - you're asking a professional without actually seeing someone about her behavior. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/4-year-old-tantrums#post-2789954 Mon, 04 Dec 2017 14:26:03 +0000 looch 2789954@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs D: If the TV is a drug to your daughter, what happens if you make it completely unavailable? My son's drug is his ipad, and he is beginning to do something similar, where he is thinking about it, planning to use it, etc. I have warned him that he's about to lose it for a month, but I feel like it has to be a longer term thing for him right now. I know that if I take the ipad away from him, it's also "punishment" for me in that I don't have a chance for uninterrupted time to do what I need to do around the house, but I am willing to do it to try to teach him. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/4-year-old-tantrums#post-2789952 Mon, 04 Dec 2017 14:18:34 +0000 Mrs D 2789952@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Thank you @gingerbebe: , I truly appreciate that.</p> <p>Some of my reaching out here was also to confirm that there is nothing wrong with my kid. </p> <p>DH reached out to his sister who recommended we see someone, so he now thinks thats the right path. I felt it was normal behavior, just hard behavior. The idea of speaking to someone regarding her behavior, from a professional standpoint, seems ridiculous. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/4-year-old-tantrums#post-2789950 Mon, 04 Dec 2017 14:14:20 +0000 Anagram 2789950@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs D: my 4 year old sleeps 8-5:30 or 6am, her okay to wake clock is set for 5:45, and she's never lasted more than 10-15 min awake without wanting a parent. She also doesn't dress herself and do morning potty routines by herself, so I'd say your 4 year old is extremely advanced to be doing all those things without parent direction at all.</p> <p>I suspect she's looking for some parent connection, whether it's negative or positive attention. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/4-year-old-tantrums#post-2789948 Mon, 04 Dec 2017 14:10:21 +0000 gingerbebe 2789948@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs D: I don't think its a lack of attention, in my personal opinion. It seems like you work extremely hard all around to keep the ship afloat and give her the most attention you can. I think the big takeaway here is that its not really your fault - its just nature. Like, its just a developmental stage your kid is in and like sleep regressions, you just gotta wait it out. Sure, there can be better ways to manage things in the moment, but even on my worst days as a parent and my 3 year old and I are waging a battle against each other, I have to remind myself even that poor engagement is good. Its GOOD for my kid, overall, to know that he has a mom that cares, that I will be an impenetrable wall when it comes to loving him, that I love him too much to let him act like a psychopath, and that he can feel safe with me to rage and be crazy when the feelings and world seem too big and illogical and frustrating for him. We are a punching bag, emotionally speaking, for these little people, and in our conflicts and moments of failure, it also helps them to see us apologize, try to do better, and wrestle together as a family. Parenting is hard, and I don't think its necessarily a bad thing for a kid to SEE their parent struggle with it and be like "this is hard for me too buddy."</p> <p>Hugs. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/4-year-old-tantrums#post-2789947 Mon, 04 Dec 2017 14:09:44 +0000 Ajsmommy 2789947@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Just commiserating here. DD just turned 4 and my oh my has her attitude started. She sounds like a teenager when she responds to me. NO joke, the whole tude is crazy. I want to know where my sweet girl went!!! She whines about everything and argues with us about every little thing... ie: "here dd give ds a kiss goodnight I'm going to put him to bed" DD-"no, he's not tired, he's just cranky"... like for real kid!?!?! who's the boss here????</p> <p>I pick her up after preschool and she tells me she doesn't want to talk and picking her up is a tight wire walk... sometimes she's so happy to see me and other times she flat out ignores me while she plays bc she doesn't want to go. Embarrassing..... </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/4-year-old-tantrums#post-2789945 Mon, 04 Dec 2017 14:03:13 +0000 Mrs D 2789945@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Kemma: Since she is the first person up with me in the morning (I am up at 5/5:30, she is up at 7, I wake up DD2 at 7:20 and DH is blissfully asleep through this all)...she always gets quality time with me. I always make a big deal about it when she comes down dressed at 7am. Big hug, kiss, me telling her how good she did and asking what show she wants to watch. If I can...I sit down with her for a few minutes with a cup of coffee. If not I usually apologize and tell her what it is I have to do so she knows I am busy and not just not sitting with her.</p> <p>She also get alone time with us at night, DD2 goes to bed by 7:30. DD1 is more like 8/815...we play a board game or color right before bed. Usually me, her and DH. The only nights we dont do that are the nights she acts out ... in which case she is usually in full tantrum mode until I coax her to going to sleep.</p> <p>So I do agree, some of the underlying issue is probably her perception of my attention...but I dont know what else I can do at this point. :( </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/4-year-old-tantrums#post-2789942 Mon, 04 Dec 2017 13:51:04 +0000 Kemma 2789942@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Just a thought but if the tantrums are an expression of emotion and frustration (no matter how trivial) then I don’t really think it’s fair to punish what is a very natural and age appropriate behaviour for a 4yo. If she can’t handle or regulate her emotions then sending her to timeout isn’t really teaching her how to handle herself or work through the big feelings.</p> <p>My other thought is that this is possibly her way of telling you that she needs more connection and time with you. I know it’s hard when you’re juggling work and family but sometimes I think kids sometimes get the short end of the stick when everybody’s busy (I know my big girl is often the one who misses out!). Could you maybe try spending an extra five minutes or so with her at bedtime or really focusing on positive interactions? Hang in there! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/4-year-old-tantrums#post-2789941 Mon, 04 Dec 2017 13:49:25 +0000 Mrs D 2789941@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>The tv in the morning thing came from similar to what @erinbaderin: mentioned...DD is addicted to TV. Its a drug for her. She was waking up early, like 5:30, 6, whatever and coming and asking for TV. When we removed the door monkey from her door (at the same time she switched from overnites to underware) we instituted the tot clock. She has always been instructed that if she wakes up and her clock is not yellow it means she should still be sleeping. If she needs to use the bathroom she can, of course. Then she should try to go back to sleep, if she cannot, she is welcome to play quietly in her room. She has a host of toys and books in her room. When the clock is yellow, she can come downstairs and if she has gotten dressed I will put on a show for her.</p> <p>In the past I have refused to turn the TV on until 7, when her clock would turn yellow. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/4-year-old-tantrums#post-2789940 Mon, 04 Dec 2017 13:44:06 +0000 Adira 2789940@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Anagram: I agree about the presents under the tree - that's just torture for a 4 year old. We don't put any presents under our tree until Christmas Eve after the kids are in bed. Then Christmas morning is this huge wonderful thing because there are sooooo many presents (some of them are to Mama and Dada, but a vast majority of them are for the kids).</p> <p>@Mrs D: @Anagram: I'm also curious about "sleep til your clock is yellow" thing. Does this just mean stay in your room until your clock turns yellow? Our kids generally get up way before we want them too, but they just play in their rooms (or go into the other's room to play) and will usually entertain themselves for about an hour (this is a 3 year old and 4 year old). </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/4-year-old-tantrums#post-2789939 Mon, 04 Dec 2017 13:43:27 +0000 erinbaderin 2789939@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs D: For us, it depends on what has happened. If he accumulated any punishments before a timeout (they're usually a last resort for us) those still stand, but otherwise, yes, timeout is the only punishment. </p> <p>I'm also wondering about the 'no tv unless you stay in your room' rule - B got into a habit of waking up early, coming into our room, and demanding to watch tv at, like, 5am, so our rule is no tv until the "sun" comes up (the clock sun, not the real sun). If he wakes up early we do try to get him back into his bed, but on weekdays when we're already up we usually end up letting him lie in our bed while we get ready for work. The tv, though, stays off until 6 when his alarm goes. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/4-year-old-tantrums#post-2789938 Mon, 04 Dec 2017 13:41:14 +0000 Mrs D 2789938@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@looch: @Anagram: this is me too :sad: ...I need to work on this. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/4-year-old-tantrums#post-2789936 Mon, 04 Dec 2017 13:36:27 +0000 Anagram 2789936@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@looch: I'm a very dramatic person too, so sometimes one kid will be doing something naughty but like, typical-for-their-age-stuff and if I give in to my impulse and shriek, like "We do NOT PULL HAIR IN THIS HOUSE!! Pulling hair hurts!" Then it just makes the perpetrator just go on a hair pulling rampage. Like in the next 5 seconds from my scream. Haha</p> <p>It's like instant fuel to the fire. I also realized that I'm an adult and I have trouble controlling my first urge, and yet I'd been expecting my 2 and 4 year olds to do it. Pretty ridiculous. </p>