https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Wed, 06 May 2026 05:23:53 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/adopting-with-a-10-day-waiting-period-wwyd#post-2475187 Thu, 25 Feb 2016 17:59:05 +0000 gingerbebe 2475187@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I would take the baby home immediately. Regardless of what the bio parents decide, that baby needs someone right now and if I can give them love and security from day 1, then I volunteer. I guess the closest thing I have to compare it to is how I decided to deal with my pregnancies after suffering multiple miscarriages: I'm going to love you and embrace you fully for as long as I'm privileged to have you with me and if I have to let you go, then so be it. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/adopting-with-a-10-day-waiting-period-wwyd#post-2475151 Thu, 25 Feb 2016 17:34:02 +0000 Rocker2014 2475151@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My best friend had to wait 9 months to finalize the adoption of her daughter. We often discussed what it would be like if the bio mom came back to take her (and at one point it looked like that could happen). I know my friend (who has an older bio son) guarded her heart a bit through that time, but always said that even if the baby went back to her bio mom, she would never have given up that time with her. She felt so privileged to be able to meet her daughter's needs and provide a loving home when she needed it most. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/adopting-with-a-10-day-waiting-period-wwyd#post-2475129 Thu, 25 Feb 2016 17:20:57 +0000 HLK208 2475129@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I would take the baby home immediately. This is so sad to think about. :crying: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/adopting-with-a-10-day-waiting-period-wwyd#post-2475126 Thu, 25 Feb 2016 17:18:55 +0000 Mrs. Oatmeal 2475126@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think here the waiting period is 60 days? Might be longer. In any case, its heart wrenching, but I would bring the baby home. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/adopting-with-a-10-day-waiting-period-wwyd#post-2474384 Thu, 25 Feb 2016 12:33:00 +0000 KT326 2474384@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>In CA I believe the birth parents have 6 months. It's terrible. I've known so many couples who have had their hearts broken because the birth parents changed their mind. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/adopting-with-a-10-day-waiting-period-wwyd#post-2474273 Thu, 25 Feb 2016 11:56:18 +0000 petitenoisette 2474273@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'd be heartbroken either way but I think even more so if the birth parents changed their minds AND I never got to have any time with the baby. It also seems like it is in the baby's best interest to be with the adoptive parents even if there is the chance of the parents taking them back. The best interest of a helpless child seems more important than those of an adoptive parent.</p> <p>However, I say this from the perspective of someone who has never had to consider adoption and I know I most likely never will so my opinion is perhaps not very relevant. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/adopting-with-a-10-day-waiting-period-wwyd#post-2474260 Thu, 25 Feb 2016 11:52:31 +0000 avivoca 2474260@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I would take the baby immediately. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/adopting-with-a-10-day-waiting-period-wwyd#post-2474256 Thu, 25 Feb 2016 11:51:49 +0000 Foodnerd81 2474256@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I said I would take the baby immediately, although really I don't know how I would respond if I was actually in the situation. But @mediagirl: that's a good point about the older kids- I can prepare myself and risk the heartache for me. It would be harder to potentially set up my kids for it. I think it would depend on the situation and how likely it seemed that the biological parents would change their minds? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/adopting-with-a-10-day-waiting-period-wwyd#post-2474247 Thu, 25 Feb 2016 11:50:14 +0000 LovelyPlum 2474247@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I would take the baby.</p> <p>This actually happened to a (second) cousin of mine. She was heartbroken. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/adopting-with-a-10-day-waiting-period-wwyd#post-2473808 Thu, 25 Feb 2016 09:26:36 +0000 ElbieKay 2473808@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think I would have to take the baby and absorb the risk. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/adopting-with-a-10-day-waiting-period-wwyd#post-2473777 Thu, 25 Feb 2016 09:17:39 +0000 snowjewelz 2473777@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Of course I probably would be so conflicted if this really were to happen. But in my ideal mind, I'd still take the baby so he/she doesn't have to be in so many different hands. He/she will ideally just be with me forever, or at least me for the period of time, then back to birth parents. instead of some merry go round. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/adopting-with-a-10-day-waiting-period-wwyd#post-2473767 Thu, 25 Feb 2016 09:14:06 +0000 Mrs.KMM 2473767@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Adoptive parents are already attached and invested before the baby is ever born. Not taking them home with you during the waiting period isn't going to change that. I would absolutely take the baby home.</p> <p>When my aunt and uncle were going through the adoption process, they had a birth mom change her mind and decide to keep her baby. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/adopting-with-a-10-day-waiting-period-wwyd#post-2473756 Thu, 25 Feb 2016 09:09:20 +0000 Anagram 2473756@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I would take the baby. We actually want to adopt through the foster system one day, when our girls are a bit older, so I've been reading a lot about adoption. Although it might be easier for ME, it's not in the best interest of a newborn baby to be shuffled around, so I would put the baby's needs before my own. </p> <p>After having my own kids, and experiencing that crushing love as soon as they are born...I think it's completely natural that a parent considering adoption might reconsider or might waiver. </p> <p>Also...let's say the baby gets to stay with us. Do you tell the baby when they are older.....we didn't know if we could keep you, so we let a random foster family take you for 10 days? Or do you keep that from them? I just couldn't. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/adopting-with-a-10-day-waiting-period-wwyd#post-2473745 Thu, 25 Feb 2016 09:02:17 +0000 sleepybear 2473745@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'd probably wait the 10 day - either way it would be heartwrenching, but it would be hard for me to bring the baby home in the mindset of being a foster parent when I'm trying to adopting. I did know of one family who plan to adopt and had the birth mom change her mind in those 10 days (I believe they chose to wait to take the baby home, upon advice from the agency) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/adopting-with-a-10-day-waiting-period-wwyd#post-2473718 Thu, 25 Feb 2016 08:51:16 +0000 mediagirl 2473718@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think if I had other kids, I would consider not taking the baby home for the waiting period timeframe. But, good point, @JoJoGirl. If you can convince yourself that you are fostering, that may be a good way to go about it. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/adopting-with-a-10-day-waiting-period-wwyd#post-2473714 Thu, 25 Feb 2016 08:49:44 +0000 JoJoGirl 2473714@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I would take the baby immediately, with the understanding that perhaps I am a "foster mom" for 10 days. to me it's not long enough to feel like my life will be torn apart if they do want the baby back. And I would appreciate giving the birth parents that opportunity to change their mind. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/adopting-with-a-10-day-waiting-period-wwyd#post-2473711 Thu, 25 Feb 2016 08:47:50 +0000 edelweiss 2473711@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>i don't think i could bear becoming attached to the baby during those 10 days and possibly having to lose him/her, so i voted to have someone else take care of the baby for the 10 days. sucks any way you cut it though. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/adopting-with-a-10-day-waiting-period-wwyd#post-2473705 Thu, 25 Feb 2016 08:46:44 +0000 regberadaisy 2473705@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I have no idea. </p> <p>I'm assuming if I knew from the start this baby was going to be mine. And knowing what I know about bonding in the first few days? I couldn't imagine someone else caring for my baby during that time. I imagine I would risk the heartache that would ensue if the birth parent chose to take the baby back.</p> <p>But I honestly don't know.</p> <p>ETA: 45 days in NY State. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/adopting-with-a-10-day-waiting-period-wwyd#post-2473701 Thu, 25 Feb 2016 08:46:01 +0000 Cole 2473701@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>That sounds heart wrenching either way so I would rather not lose the chance to experience those ten days. Assuming it went through I would be so sad if I had had the chance to be with my child but chose not to. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/adopting-with-a-10-day-waiting-period-wwyd#post-2473699 Thu, 25 Feb 2016 08:45:21 +0000 LBee 2473699@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I would take the baby immediately. I wouldn't want to forgo the first 10 days just to protect myself. I think adoption is an incredibly selfless and emotional experience - you risk your heart, so to speak, so much. I think 10 days would be the least of my worries. I would mourn the baby if the parents changed their mind regardless of whether I had those first 10 days. </p> <p>I was just doing some googling to see the wait period for my state (5 days) and saw Texas had SIX (!!!) months. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/adopting-with-a-10-day-waiting-period-wwyd#post-2473696 Thu, 25 Feb 2016 08:41:45 +0000 mediagirl 2473696@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I was reading an article today that said in the state where I live, there is a 10 day waiting period after the birth of a child for the birth parents to change their mind. Adoptive parents have the choice of taking the baby home immediately and possibly having the birth parents change their mind and take the baby back. Or, they could have a temporary foster home take the baby for those 10 days and if the 10 days passes without incident, then take their baby home. Then if the birth parents change their minds, you are not attached. </p> <p>So, what would you do? If you were adopting a newborn and the parents had a 10 day window to change their minds, would you take the baby home immediately or let someone else care for the baby until you are "sure" that baby is going to be your child? </p>