https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Wed, 20 May 2026 05:57:02 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/advice-for-a-3-year-old-who-hates-sleep/page/2#post-2677590 Tue, 10 Jan 2017 21:46:17 +0000 littlejoy 2677590@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Sunshine: What kills me is that switching to 8:00 has made bedtime a little easier for her (thank goodness, because my heart was breaking for her), but now it's really hard to wake her up in the morning ... it makes me feel like she does need more sleep. Gah! It's hard. On Friday, she took a 3.5 hour nap (I'm in my 1st trimester, and I fell asleep too and forgot an alarm), and she still slept 11 hours at night. So who knows! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/advice-for-a-3-year-old-who-hates-sleep/page/2#post-2677575 Tue, 10 Jan 2017 21:32:53 +0000 Mrs. Sunshine 2677575@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@littlejoy: maybe I'll start cutting my LO's naps off at 1.5 hours. I usually let her nap 2 hours (her natural nap length) and I enjoy a quiet house so it's hard to cut it shorter but if it leads to better night sleep, it's worth it! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/advice-for-a-3-year-old-who-hates-sleep/page/2#post-2677488 Tue, 10 Jan 2017 18:21:27 +0000 littlejoy 2677488@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I thought I would share a little update ... THANK YOU to everyone who suggested a later bedtime. Everything I had read suggested an early bedtime is beneficial to more restful sleep, and I just hadn't looked at a sleep chart lately. As soon as we switched to 8:00 (instead of 7:00), things have been a bit better. </p> <p>We saw her doctor last week who said nap is likely still important at her age (and level of energy), but that we should keep it to 1.5 hours or less. </p> <p>It's still not easy - anyone who doesn't have a child with major sleep issues can't understand, but it sounds like most of you have been there. It's so hard ... thankful for the advice here. It's helping. :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/advice-for-a-3-year-old-who-hates-sleep/page/2#post-2673733 Wed, 04 Jan 2017 11:27:11 +0000 winniebee 2673733@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@littlejoy: I'm glad you figured it out. My older son has been lower sleep needs. He dropped his nap before 3 and would then sleep 730-630. At age 4.5 he sleeps 830-630ish, no nap, ever. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/advice-for-a-3-year-old-who-hates-sleep/page/2#post-2673608 Wed, 04 Jan 2017 08:36:29 +0000 irene 2673608@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I just read this and I am so glad you figured out it worked now for a later bedtime! Yes it was a tough transitioning for the kid and the parents (14 hours to 10 hours! Haha!). My DS used to push bedtime all the way to 10:30pm or 11 (!!!) so consider yourself lucky! This phase will go too, and now at 5, I am hoping to move bedtime up from 8 to 7:30 or 7... again !!! ;-)</p> <p>There are still times DS won't go to sleep and keep getting up and ask for things. We don't have a lock at all so he can come out. We just give very minimal interaction and make it super uninteresting. DH sometimes say, if you can't sleep, please just sit here for the rest of the night. Mommy and I are going to bed soon. He'd sit there for a while, and he'd leave on his own. When he still comes up in 10 minute intervals, I would start fake calling a pediatrician that he hates (One time he gave him very bad tasting medicine and his fever / illness got worse) to check up on him. He'd go back to bed then usually. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/advice-for-a-3-year-old-who-hates-sleep/page/2#post-2673469 Tue, 03 Jan 2017 18:37:49 +0000 Nutella 2673469@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@littlejoy: hi! I just read this whole thread and wanted to say I totally feel your pain, so can completely commiserate! Our LO (nearly 3) had been a champion sleeper up until two months ago, taking giant midday naps and going to sleep at 7.30 for twelve hours, but then all of a sudden he has decided he will yell and fight and refuse night time sleep anytime before 10.30/11pm! Which is painful for many reasons (first tri exhaustion here is the least of them!) but if we even give him a tiny nap midday it's all over. It also coincided with him moving into a big boy bed so he has the freedom to walk out of bed and into the lounge where we are recovering :silly: </p> <p>So, we have started cutting out all daytime sleeps, and avoiding the car anytime in the afternoon. It works some nights but generally it's a battle keeping him in his bed, he wants to come into ours! So for the sake of sleep we just let him fall asleep in our bed with me (thanks to my crazy early bedtimes now) and then transfer him to his bed when he's out for the count.</p> <p>Daycare will be the next hurdle as he still sleeps one hour there, we had to limit it as he was having two hour naps and refusing to sleep until midnight! I never thought he would be one of those to drop the nap before he turned 5, but it is pretty clear he just needs way less sleep than he did as a 2.5 year old. Come to think don't, when he was in the cot, he often spent a lot of the time in there talking to himself (i.e. Not sleeping) so maybe it has been brewing for a while!</p> <p>I am heartbroken he doesn't want to sleep as much as we do, but hoping cutting out the daycare sleep will do the trick. He has to have a limit to how much he can stay awake....</p> <p>So sorry no tips, but just wanted to share my experience so you know it's not just you!!</p> <p>Good luck! If I find anything that works I will come back and update you :heart: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/advice-for-a-3-year-old-who-hates-sleep/page/2#post-2673453 Tue, 03 Jan 2017 17:35:05 +0000 littlejoy 2673453@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Sunshine: I feel for you. It's SO HARD. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/advice-for-a-3-year-old-who-hates-sleep/page/2#post-2673429 Tue, 03 Jan 2017 16:32:54 +0000 Mrs. Sunshine 2673429@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We're struggling too. Going to bed isn't quite as difficult for as you described it is for you but we have at least 30 minutes of "fighting" every night. She needs water, to potty, to give daddy another hug, she's not comfortable...she comes to our room in the night 1 to 4 times a night and is up at 630. She totally still seems like she needs a nap. If she doesn't nap we generally end up with her as a crying blubbering mess by 530. But I am so freaking tired of getting up in the middle of the night and racing to wake up before her in the mornings. I just want her to stay in her bed! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/advice-for-a-3-year-old-who-hates-sleep/page/2#post-2673420 Tue, 03 Jan 2017 16:08:14 +0000 gingerbebe 2673420@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My son is 28 months so not the same, but we recently transitioned him out of his crib. We were having major issues getting him to settle down because he's my high-strung, easily overstimulated, and high-energy child. He needs his naps and early bedtimes and his crib gave him a lot of security - it was a zone of rest that I could instantly see calmed him when we put him in there. Suddenly being able to get out of it made him nuts and he was acting a fool. We got the Privacy Pop tent and stuck our twin mattress inside and locked the zippers with a small carabiner (super easy and fast to unsnap in the dark or in an emergency). We have white noise and as an added measure we put a doorframe lock on his door but haven't had to use it with the locked zippers.</p> <p>He was a little confused by the tent the first two days and cried maybe 10-15 minutes but then something clicked and he understood it was a rest zone like his crib was. He has all his stuffed animals, we can put a leakproof water cup in there (Contigo Gizmo), and he just hollers in the morning when he's awake. We have been at my inlaws for 16 days for Christmas and we brought the tent with us and he's napped and slept beautifully in it. He even asks to go to bed sometimes and loves to plop down in it. The only thing we've held firm on is not sleeping in there with him (we will read books and snuggle together in the mornings and some comforting in the MOTN if he's sick but we explain he sleeps in his bed, baby sleeps in baby's bed, and mommy and daddy sleep in our bed.)</p> <p>Child Proof Deluxe Door Top Lock <a href="https://www.amazon.com/dp/B012BR4TGA/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_IdbByb4G4TWT4" rel="nofollow">https://www.amazon.com/dp/B012BR4TGA/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_IdbByb4G4TWT4</a> </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/advice-for-a-3-year-old-who-hates-sleep/page/2#post-2673402 Tue, 03 Jan 2017 15:26:13 +0000 littlejoy 2673402@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Carrot: I'm sorry you're dealing with this too. Sleep stuff is so hard! And, the later bedtime is "working". She still does all of the "I need xyz", but she seems to be falling asleep faster. It's really hard to wake her in the mornings now, which confirmed my original suspicion of her still needing 12 hours at night. Sigh. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/advice-for-a-3-year-old-who-hates-sleep/page/2#post-2673398 Tue, 03 Jan 2017 15:13:22 +0000 Mrs. Carrot 2673398@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@littlejoy: I have zero advice here, but just wanted to chime in that my 3.5 year old is exactly like yours and if she naps, there is zero chance she goes to bed before 10, if that. 10:30-11 is a normal for her for the weekdays when she does nap (at daycare). When she doesn't nap, she has ~13 hours of awake time so we can time it and we can usually get her in bed quickly and much more easily. And nothing works on this kid - not the clock, not the locked door, nada. So I totally empathize and glad to hear the later bedtime is working! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/advice-for-a-3-year-old-who-hates-sleep/page/2#post-2673363 Tue, 03 Jan 2017 14:31:37 +0000 littlejoy 2673363@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Kemma: Oh no ... she loses her shit if someone else tries to put her to sleep. And to be fair, I just mean she's pulls all of the same stuff. She convinced her babysitter that we always leave her door wide open at bedtime (which I specifically left instructions about). </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/advice-for-a-3-year-old-who-hates-sleep/page/2#post-2672066 Fri, 30 Dec 2016 13:51:18 +0000 rachiecakes 2672066@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@yoursilverlining: @littlejoy: yes! I leave for work really early in the morning and my husband works nights. I go to bed the same time as my son every night and always have pretty much. I could get a few hours to myself but like you said, I'd have to be up late and it's just not worth it! :wink: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/advice-for-a-3-year-old-who-hates-sleep/page/2#post-2672038 Fri, 30 Dec 2016 13:11:22 +0000 littlejoy 2672038@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@rachiecakes: @yoursilverlining: The 7:00 bedtime was pretty amazing for me time ... really, DH and I usually curl up on the couch and watch TV together. And, we can still do it at 8:00 (even if I go to bed at 8:30, because of 1st trimester fatigue!) :silly: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/advice-for-a-3-year-old-who-hates-sleep/page/2#post-2672036 Fri, 30 Dec 2016 13:06:54 +0000 yoursilverlining 2672036@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@littlejoy: I totally get it; it's hard. Like you, I'm pretty high sleep needs and my husband isn't. I just had to accept that LO is (apparently) like my husband and not me. I also always run cold and my husband runs hot and LO refuses to sleep under blankets and runs hot too - that's another one I'm always having to remind myself to let LO be herself on, versus me piling more blankets on her while she sleeps because *I'm* cold :silly: </p> <p>@rachiecakes: oh yeah, me time after the kids go down doesn't work too well unless I stay up super late! Then I'm so tired the next day - not worth it! :silly: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/advice-for-a-3-year-old-who-hates-sleep/page/2#post-2671995 Fri, 30 Dec 2016 12:19:51 +0000 rachiecakes 2671995@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@yoursilverlining: totally agree! Comparing my son to charts for his age group never matched up. As LOs are individual humans with individual differences and needs, I believe that some kids just don't need that much sleep (and some do!).<br /> My son has never, ever slept 12 hours straight. Even when he was an infant. If he sleeps longer than 10 hours I worry that he's sick. He's always been low sleep needs, it's just how he is. I'm the same way and my mother tells me that I was like that as a child as well.<br /> It's a bummer that I never get the 'me time' that I hear about in the 'after the kid goes to sleep' hours of the day, but that's just not our reality, haha<br /> Otherwise, he's happy, healthy and developing right on schedule. I just had to let go of the idea that he would sleep more hours than me. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/advice-for-a-3-year-old-who-hates-sleep/page/2#post-2671993 Fri, 30 Dec 2016 12:18:10 +0000 MrsB2012 2671993@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My daughter is 3.5 and I just wrote a very similar post a couple of weeks ago.<br /> Our issues were her getting up 100 times after she went to bed, then coming into our room at night time, and often waking up early.<br /> She had a 7pm bedtime and still naps for about an hour in the afternoon.</p> <p>We have just gone on 3 nights in a row of her much improved sleeping, these are the changes we made.</p> <p>If she naps, I push bedtime to 8pm. If she doesn't nap, I keep her bedtime between 7pm-730pm. I am a huge stickler for naps and an early bedtime, I didn't want to push to a later bedtime, or get rid of her nap. I know she needs it even though it's the first thing everyone suggests to get rid of. I've tried to become a bit more easy with the nap, as long as she's in her room and quiet, I'm happy with that. Before, if I could hear her talking or playing, I'd go in there and tell her to close her eyes etc.</p> <p>For Christmas I asked for a gro clock for her. We set it up on Xmas eve and she's finally understanding it. The past 3 days she hasn't come out of her room until the sun is up on her clock. ( Today she got up at 720, yesterday 8 and the day before 9, the clock is set for 715.)</p> <p>We bought her a double mattress. We had her in the crib as a toddler bed ( with the one side of the crib off ) but as we are having another baby, we need the crib back. We were going to wait until we move in a few weeks but bought it on sale on boxing day. She's slept through the night every night since she's had the new bed and coming out of her room only maybe 3 times last night, once the night before, and none the first night. </p> <p>I'm not sure if it's a combination of the new bed and the clock or what, but something has seemed to have clicked with her. Just hoping it lasts! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/advice-for-a-3-year-old-who-hates-sleep/page/2#post-2671986 Fri, 30 Dec 2016 12:12:57 +0000 littlejoy 2671986@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@yoursilverlining: There is a lot of information about earlier bedtimes, and how it's actually better for kids. I think I had that so stuck in my head, that I wasn't considering maybe *she* just doesn't need that much sleep. Personally, I need 9 hours a night ... my husband is fine with 6, and I'm realizing kids are likely the same. We did 8:00 last night, and it went really well. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/advice-for-a-3-year-old-who-hates-sleep#post-2671979 Fri, 30 Dec 2016 12:04:49 +0000 yoursilverlining 2671979@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>There's no way my LO would have ever fallen asleep at 7PM when she was 3. Putting her to bed that early would have led to battles like you describe because the bedtime was too early and she wasn't tired yet or ready to sleep. I'm with others who say try moving back bedtime. When LO was 3 she often wouldn't even fall asleep at 8. Some kids just don't need that much sleep and trying to force it leads to power struggles and battles. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/advice-for-a-3-year-old-who-hates-sleep#post-2671976 Fri, 30 Dec 2016 11:58:27 +0000 sarac 2671976@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My daughter would have been like this at 3 if I had tried to put her to bed too early. She had to nap, she absolutely wasn't able to get through the day without it, but when she napped for long, bedtime was 9 or later. Sometimes 10. Now that she's in kindergarten, she can get through the day without a nap, and she easily goes to bed at 8. But it was 9 or 10 until then. We got a lot of flack for it, but the options were that, or stay home literally all day so that she doesn't nap in the car, or do two hours of screaming and fighting when we put her to bed too early. </p> <p>Also, she has always needed the cuddles to fall asleep. </p> <p>I would try pushing bedtime back until she's actually sleepy, and I would personally try laying with her until she falls asleep. I know that it's hard when you hear that 3 year olds need so much sleep, and when so many children go right to bed at 8 - but lots of children just . . . don't. I always thought that not fighting it was overall easier, and I think that choice would make a lot of family's lives easier too. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/advice-for-a-3-year-old-who-hates-sleep#post-2671802 Fri, 30 Dec 2016 02:52:52 +0000 Kemma 2671802@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@littlejoy: just another thought but what happens if other people try and put her to bed at night? Is it just you and her Dad that she plays up for? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/advice-for-a-3-year-old-who-hates-sleep#post-2671489 Thu, 29 Dec 2016 15:41:16 +0000 littlejoy 2671489@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>A small update: we are going to try a later bedtime starting tonight, and implement some extra calm evening measures (like lower lights, some breathing/massage). </p> <p>I just made an appointment to see her doc (we weren't scheduled to see her until her well-child visit in February), so it feels nice to have that on the calendar. </p> <p>Thank you again to all of you for sharing such helpful advice!! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/advice-for-a-3-year-old-who-hates-sleep#post-2671488 Thu, 29 Dec 2016 15:39:50 +0000 littlejoy 2671488@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Kemma: That's an interesting thought ... I wonder what that would look like? You're right about her creating habits. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/advice-for-a-3-year-old-who-hates-sleep#post-2671487 Thu, 29 Dec 2016 15:39:00 +0000 Kemma 2671487@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@littlejoy: what would happen if you completely changed up the bedtime routine? I just wonder if the stalling is so ingrained as part of the current routine that her body no longer gets sleep cues and she can't wind down. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/advice-for-a-3-year-old-who-hates-sleep#post-2671456 Thu, 29 Dec 2016 14:03:00 +0000 littlejoy 2671456@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Pumpkin Pie: My friend suggested a roll-on mag, and I forgot ... she said it really helps her kids!! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/advice-for-a-3-year-old-who-hates-sleep#post-2671455 Thu, 29 Dec 2016 14:01:44 +0000 Pumpkin Pie 2671455@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@littlejoy: i just remembered that we use magnesium lotion on DD. We started using it when she was an infant and had major sleep problems. DH takes magnesium when he has trouble sleeping and says it helps. Others on HB also recommended the magnesium lotion. You can give that a try. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/advice-for-a-3-year-old-who-hates-sleep#post-2671440 Thu, 29 Dec 2016 13:40:56 +0000 littlejoy 2671440@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@PurplePeony: Thanks for the recommendation!! </p> <p>@MamaG: Seriously! I LOVE sleep!!! Ha. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/advice-for-a-3-year-old-who-hates-sleep#post-2671439 Thu, 29 Dec 2016 13:40:31 +0000 littlejoy 2671439@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Madison43: Thank you! I think I was just trying to hold onto 14+ hours of sleep per day, and that's just not a reality for us anymore. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/advice-for-a-3-year-old-who-hates-sleep#post-2671437 Thu, 29 Dec 2016 13:39:43 +0000 PurplePeony 2671437@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@littlejoy: Badger Balm has an aromatherapy balm called "Night-Night Balm" that's formulated for kids. It's lavender and chamomile, and I don't think it has any allergens in it. I've had some for ages and never used it, but I'm going to start because my DD (who just turned 3) is doing the exact same thing as yours. 😕 </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/advice-for-a-3-year-old-who-hates-sleep#post-2671436 Thu, 29 Dec 2016 13:39:28 +0000 MamaG 2671436@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@littlejoy: Sleep is hard, down time for parents is precious! I totally get it. We have some nights now that our 2 year old battles for 2+ hours and it's absolutely miserable. I question why my kids hate sleep so much nearly daily. </p>