https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Sat, 25 Apr 2026 09:15:59 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/advice-needed-job-offer-etiquette#post-359039 Wed, 24 Oct 2012 18:25:38 +0000 sunny 359039@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I would not say a peep until I had a written offer in hand. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/advice-needed-job-offer-etiquette#post-358922 Wed, 24 Oct 2012 16:22:32 +0000 sunshineandsushi 358922@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Agree with others, wait until you have a written job offer. Another thing I would keep in mind - if more money at his current job is possible, why isn't he already being offered it? My opinion is that if they think they can get away with paying him less money unless competition is presented, it's better to go with the new job offer. Seems like they know what he's worth and are willing to pay it. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/advice-needed-job-offer-etiquette#post-358891 Wed, 24 Oct 2012 16:02:39 +0000 Mrs. Tricycle 358891@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'd totally wait for an offer -- but in my field they ALWAYS call your current employer before making an offer -- maybe that's just something that happens in education? In previous situations, I've asked the prospective employer to let me know before they call my current employer -- at that point it's almost a done deal, but I can be the one to explain the situation to my current boss. Maybe not an issue in his field? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/advice-needed-job-offer-etiquette#post-358794 Wed, 24 Oct 2012 15:27:35 +0000 Mrs. Blue 358794@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I 100% agree with PP! Wait until he has a firm offer so he doesn't risk his loosing his current job and also gives him more negotiating strength if he wants to try to stay with his current employer. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/advice-needed-job-offer-etiquette#post-358658 Wed, 24 Oct 2012 14:18:11 +0000 Adira 358658@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Absolutely wait until you receive an offer. I've had friends that had similar conversations with interviewers and talent directors and then never received an official offer because other stuff happened. Your husband doesn't want to put any strain on his relationship with his boss or coworkers unless he has to. If he doesn't receive an offer and he tells them about this, he's basically saying "I'm not happy here."</p> <p>Have him wait and as soon as he gets the offer, THEN go to his boss with the situation. Maybe have him tell his boss that he really loves working for him and loves the job, but with the pay increase, he really can't pass it up. That might get his boss more willing to negotiate on his behalf to get him a pay increase at his current job.</p> <p>Good luck to you and your husband! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/advice-needed-job-offer-etiquette#post-358643 Wed, 24 Oct 2012 14:14:24 +0000 MediaNaranja 358643@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I agree with other posters. I would not mention anything until there is a written offer in hand, there are too many things that could go wrong if an offer never materializes. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/advice-needed-job-offer-etiquette#post-358641 Wed, 24 Oct 2012 14:14:01 +0000 Smurfette 358641@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@highwire: Agreed! I wouldn't say anything till I had an offer in hand. No matter what. You never know what could happen. Promised/open jobs fall through all the time. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/advice-needed-job-offer-etiquette#post-358639 Wed, 24 Oct 2012 14:13:56 +0000 JennyPenny 358639@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Thanks ladies! You made me realize something that hadn't occurred to me - that saying "They've offered $XX" is a lot more convincing than "They said that they'd probably offer somewhere around $XX" </p> <p>It seems so straightforward now hearing your input. I feel silly for even thinking of suggesting that DH tell is manager :-P </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/advice-needed-job-offer-etiquette#post-358638 Wed, 24 Oct 2012 14:13:23 +0000 Revel 358638@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Agree with the PPs that he should wait until he has an official offer in hand. So much can change before that happens. When he tells his current boss, he can always explain that he wants to stay (if he does) if they could offer him more, and that he would need to know by X date (whenever he would need to accept or reject the new offer) if they were going to attempt to keep him. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/advice-needed-job-offer-etiquette#post-358633 Wed, 24 Oct 2012 14:12:08 +0000 oliviaoblivia 358633@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I agree with @Highwire. I wouldn't do anything without a written offer in hand. I think it's great he wants to make a potential transition with his current job easier for his team, but if nothing comes to fruition he'll be left in an awkward position.</p> <p>I was in a similar position once where I was told by multiple people that an offer was forthcoming - it never came and they decided to promote from within. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/advice-needed-job-offer-etiquette#post-358626 Wed, 24 Oct 2012 14:10:48 +0000 aprk 358626@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I would not tell my current job until I had a written offer. I certainly don't expect this would happen to you husband, or is common, but I've seen too many people get burned by going off of a verbal offer that didn't materialize into a written contract for whatever reason.</p> <p>I think if the current boss were to make a counter-offer for more money, you might be surprised at how quickly that could get turned around. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/advice-needed-job-offer-etiquette#post-358618 Wed, 24 Oct 2012 14:09:17 +0000 DillonLion 358618@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I would absolutely wait until there is an official offer in hand. And then your DH can see if your current employer is willing to match it. I would keep absolutely tight lipped about it until then. If the deal falls through and the boss knows, that doesn't look good for your DH.</p> <p>ETA: I haven't been in this position, but I had a friend who got offered a different job, spoke too soon to the current employer, and the new job fell through and the offer was retracted. And now he looks like he was out scoping for other jobs. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/advice-needed-job-offer-etiquette#post-358614 Wed, 24 Oct 2012 14:07:25 +0000 JennyPenny 358614@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm in desperate need of advice and the can't find anything helpful on the internet!</p> <p>The situation is this: Recently, a friend of DH told him that his company is looking for people who do iPad development, which DH has been doing for years. He's had an informal phone interview and spoken with their "Talent Director" both of whom said from their perspective he'd be offered a job making 50% more than he currently makes, but there are a few more hoops and formalities. He has not received an official offer. </p> <p>The big question is - when should he tell his current boss. He really likes his current manager and they have a really friendly relationship. His manager also strongly values him as an employee and has told him numerous times that he's the strongest asset to the group (its a group of 10 or so people at a large international company). DH wants to be respectful and tell his manager as soon as possible so that the manager doesn't feel betrayed or lied to. However, he also is worried about saying something before he has an official offer, because what if it falls through - with that hurt their work relationship?</p> <p>Another issue is whether or not his current manager would seek to offer a higher salary. We think its a strong possibility, in which case, the more lead time he has the better (since it is a big company and its not just up to him - it would take time). </p> <p>DH has asked me what he should do, and I have no ready answer for him. What do you all recommend? Has anyone been in a similar position? </p>