https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Wed, 22 Apr 2026 05:12:19 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/anyone-choose-to-not-breastfeed-2-after-breastfeeding-lo1#post-2070078 Sat, 14 Feb 2015 18:12:01 +0000 Me3 2070078@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I nursed my first baby for 4 months through immense pain—mostly due to what I thought were latch issues, but now realize were problems with flat/inverted nipples and maybe even Reinaud’s Sydrome. At 4 months I switched to EPing, which I kept up until my son was a year old. I continued to experience pain and blistering with pumping. When I finally weaned from pumping, I told my DH and mom that if I had to do it again, I never would have tortured myself so much over BFing. Looking back, it really made my first year as a mom so much harder and less enjoyable. I spent so much time in pain, pumping, and stressing about pumping, it was insane. </p> <p>So when I was pregnant with my second, I vowed not to do the same thing, Much of my breastfeeding struggles are related to breast anatomy, so I knew there was a good chance I would face the same problems. When my second was born, everything was eerily similar to my first BFing experience. I had a long, difficult induction. Baby could not latch on successfully, despite help from 4 different LCs/nurses. When the LC suggested that I start pumping and using a nipple shield, I wanted to cry. I pumped once, and it brought back so many sad feelings right away. I was so lucky to have a final consultation with a wonderful LC who helped me latch the baby on with a SNS, but nursing hurt terribly right away. It was exactly the same as when I had nursed my first, but this time I knew I was not willing (or able) to sacrifice my sanity and miss out on my baby’s first year just to breastfeed him. I was so thankful for that last LC who looked at me, saw how much pain I was already experiencing when my baby finally did latch on, and told me it was absolutely OK not to breastfeed. She said, “They tell us not to say this, but at least 10% of mamas just cannot breastfeed successfully. I think you are in that 10%.” This did not hurt my feelings at all—it was so freeing to feel OK about choosing not to breastfeed. So I have been giving LO2 formula since he was 2 days old, and I can’t believe what a different experience I am having with my baby! I am enjoying his newborn days. I do not dread going to bed every night knowing that I’ll be in excruciating pain when I get up to nurse. I do not spend hours a day pumping and NOT holding my baby. I get to share feeding duties with DH, and he loves it. It has been such a positive thing for my whole family.</p> <p>I wanted to share my experience just in case breastfeeding is tough for you the second time around. I went into it really hoping to have a positive breastfeeding experience this second time, but I am having a very positive experience with FF instead and it has been great. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/anyone-choose-to-not-breastfeed-2-after-breastfeeding-lo1#post-2069732 Sat, 14 Feb 2015 10:44:36 +0000 Canoli 2069732@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My thoughts about it with #2 were different. With my first I had ideas that it would be easy and planned to do it until a year. I had no idea I would have low supply. I had to start supplementing around 4-5 months when my stash was gone. I went until 10.5 months when I was just miserable and couldn't take it.</p> <p>With #2 I decided to lower my expectations. I figured I would have low supply again and decided to just go with the flow. I nursed while on maternity leave and had a very small stash when I went back to work (I was not stressing while on leave with pumping and building a stash, I just wanted to enjoy my time with my babe). I started supplementing the week after he started daycare. I figured whatever breastmilk he got was a bonus. Around 8 months when he got teeth I wasn't able to adjust his latch and it became stressful and painful and I stopped and gave him only formula and it's been wonderful! Thankfully he loves his bottle and formula. </p> <p>Changing my expectations and refusing to give into the mommy guilt helped me. I focused my thinking to "is my baby happy, healthy, and gaining weight?" The answer is yes and to me that's all that matters. Also, this mama is happy too and that is important too. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/anyone-choose-to-not-breastfeed-2-after-breastfeeding-lo1#post-2069702 Sat, 14 Feb 2015 10:06:18 +0000 Mamasig 2069702@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Lion: Very good point about the bonding. I never felt this magical moment with my kids when I breastfed. I felt exactly the same when I gave them a bottle. Actually, I probably felt better because I wasn't stressed and knew it wouldn't hurt. When I feel guilt about not breastfeeding, I think it's because I didn't like it. Like somehow that makes me abnormal. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/anyone-choose-to-not-breastfeed-2-after-breastfeeding-lo1#post-2069700 Sat, 14 Feb 2015 10:03:46 +0000 Amelieisme 2069700@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I dreaded it second time around for sure! LO1 had a tongue tie (clipped at 2 weeks) and I had supply issues as a result. We did okay after the initial 6 weeks of hell though, but I was always struggling to keep up with demand. I EBF for 6 mo then supplemented until 11 mo.</p> <p>With LO2 everything was so much easier. I still don't love it and am counting the days until she is 1 (6 weeks away!) when I will wean, but definitely easier than with DS. I didn't need to supplement until she was just past 9 months. I say go into it with a short term goal of say two months and see how it goes. The idea of breast-feeding for a year sounded unbearable on the front end, but I just took it one step at a time and here we are :happy: :goodluck: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/anyone-choose-to-not-breastfeed-2-after-breastfeeding-lo1#post-2069694 Sat, 14 Feb 2015 09:50:50 +0000 meredithNYC 2069694@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Breast feeding was an emotional nightmare for me with low supply and ppd. I am telling myself to go into it with an open mind this time, but to also go easy on myself. I dream of being blessed with a good supply. But honestly, even if I do I don't think I could commit to it beyond a year. Having "ownership" over my body is a deeply important issue to me. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/anyone-choose-to-not-breastfeed-2-after-breastfeeding-lo1#post-2069672 Sat, 14 Feb 2015 09:22:47 +0000 Mrs. Lion 2069672@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I will be a lot quicker to throw in the towel this time than I was last time. BF for me is a means to an end...I just want my baby fed, and if I can BF thats awesome, because it is cheaper and technically better for digestion, but when all is said and done I am going to be home alone with a young toddler and an infant and they deserve a peaceful momma. So if it doesn't work out this time (I switched to EPing last time at 4 months because BF was hell) I won't hesitate to switch to formula. </p> <p>For me the "bonding" is a non-issue. I am completely bonded to my son and it had nothing to do with whether we had a breastfeeding "relationship". More power to the mommas who really enjoy it....I was just not one of them. and never for a second mourned the loss of that experience. I got the same experience feeding him a bottle. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/anyone-choose-to-not-breastfeed-2-after-breastfeeding-lo1#post-2069654 Sat, 14 Feb 2015 08:58:11 +0000 yin 2069654@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I EP'ed with LO1, and I told myself I would never do that again. I did want to give breastfeeding a shot since it didn't work out with my first. Luckily I didn't have to EP (and only pumped a handful of times) and breastfeeding worked out. I would have formula fed with no hesitation with LO2. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/anyone-choose-to-not-breastfeed-2-after-breastfeeding-lo1#post-2069646 Sat, 14 Feb 2015 08:49:42 +0000 blackbird 2069646@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>So I actually feel the same about breastfeeding #2. Just sort of dreading the whole miserable process. My approach is that if it goes easily and smoothly, I'll do it. And probably use formula at night when I go back to work so I can trade nights with my husband. This was crucial to our sanity last time. I have no desire to be the only source of food while working full time (and after E was raised majority on formula, I just don't get the hype).....but if it's a pain in the ass and we run into big hurdles, I'm doing formula. I just kind of don't care. I don't have anything to prove to myself or anyone else and if people give me shit this time (cough, mom, cough), I will speak my mind. </p> <p>I will NOT EP. I did that last time. No no no no no x 100 </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/anyone-choose-to-not-breastfeed-2-after-breastfeeding-lo1#post-2069627 Sat, 14 Feb 2015 08:11:25 +0000 Mamasig 2069627@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Well I only breastfed dS1 for a few weeks but said I'd try again with DS2. The feelings I felt the 1st time were the same and I quit even earlier. My mental and emotional health were more important. I do think each time may be different so if I have a 3rd I'll probably try again. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/anyone-choose-to-not-breastfeed-2-after-breastfeeding-lo1#post-2069603 Sat, 14 Feb 2015 06:50:58 +0000 HappyBaker 2069603@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I also had one weird nipple so nursing DD1 was a huge struggle and although I made it to a year I never enjoyed it.</p> <p>For DS when I was pregnant I told myself I'd give it a shot but not be upset if we switched to formula right away because it wasn't worth the emotional upset to me to go through that again. With him my milk came in really late so we gave him formula on night 4, and then I switched to EP-ing because I swear I have PTSD about having a baby latch! He is 6 weeks old and I'm still EP-ing, and although I am currently making what he needs each day I have no issue giving him formula to supplement, and I'm only EP-ing for as long as it works / is not a huge life interrupter. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/anyone-choose-to-not-breastfeed-2-after-breastfeeding-lo1#post-2069588 Sat, 14 Feb 2015 05:45:51 +0000 Mrs. Deer 2069588@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Hoping to do a blog post soon, but I breastfed my first for 18 months and now, due to a whole slew of reasons (protein intolerances, nursing rejection, poor latch) we're moving over to formula at 4 months. Never something I'd envisioned but here we are all the same! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/anyone-choose-to-not-breastfeed-2-after-breastfeeding-lo1#post-2069585 Sat, 14 Feb 2015 05:09:33 +0000 Charm54 2069585@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I tried to bf dd and put myself through hell for a month - hating every minute of it. I then switched to EPing and supplementing for 6 months and was much happier.</p> <p>With this one, I won't BF at all. I will EP and supplement - but if EPing is too challenging this time with a toddler running around , I will have no qualms switching to FFing. I'm most worried about how my hospital will react when I tell them I won't even be trying to BF this time around. They're pretty a pretty rigid "Baby Friendly" hospital. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/anyone-choose-to-not-breastfeed-2-after-breastfeeding-lo1#post-2069581 Sat, 14 Feb 2015 04:36:28 +0000 T.H.O.U. 2069581@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I was tired going into it all again but overall I loved BFing for 18 months. The beginning was so much easier knowing what I was doing with #2</p> <p>This time though I said I will not beat myself up if we have to supplement after 6-8 months. I think it's silly to sorry about BM versus formula when they could also eat a chicken nugget. But I do hope pump / nurse enough to at least get to 12-18 months again. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/anyone-choose-to-not-breastfeed-2-after-breastfeeding-lo1#post-2069516 Sat, 14 Feb 2015 00:03:54 +0000 Mrs. Jacks 2069516@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Yes, but it was a little different with adoption ;) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/anyone-choose-to-not-breastfeed-2-after-breastfeeding-lo1#post-2069513 Sat, 14 Feb 2015 00:00:02 +0000 birdofafeather 2069513@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>i'm not pregnant yet, but i do wonder about this because while BFing was easy (relatively) for us, it was super time consuming and I did it for 18 months. but after we got past the hard parts, it was much easier than making up bottles all the time. i think next time around, i won't sweat it as much if i can't pump enough, etc (although i was a leaky mess, so that was definitely part of it too!) and if i need to send DH in or give formula, i won't freak out like i did with #1. i kinda feel like 2+ kids just have to go with the flow? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/anyone-choose-to-not-breastfeed-2-after-breastfeeding-lo1#post-2069508 Fri, 13 Feb 2015 23:54:24 +0000 Zbug 2069508@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I don't have personal experience with this, but the topic recently came up on a BFing board I'm in. It seems like your feelings are extremely common, but most people said they felt differently once the baby arrived. Obviously, you will figure out what's best for you, but you may feel differently after birth. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/anyone-choose-to-not-breastfeed-2-after-breastfeeding-lo1#post-2069502 Fri, 13 Feb 2015 23:45:52 +0000 MrsRcCar 2069502@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>This time around with E, I told myself that if it didn't work I wouldn't pump this time. N never latched and I pumped for almost 8/9 months. I decided I will never do that again. I felt like I missed out too much. We were lucky that E took to nursing like a champ so I haven't touched my pump since he came home. ;) </p> <p>Good luck with whatever you decide. :heart: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/anyone-choose-to-not-breastfeed-2-after-breastfeeding-lo1#post-2069480 Fri, 13 Feb 2015 23:11:48 +0000 Corduroy 2069480@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm 22 weeks with LO2 and I'm dreading everything about BFing. I BF LO1 until 17 months. I pumped religiously at work. Pumped at home to make enough for LO. I struggled with and then gave up on my inverted nipple at 10 weeks. I lived with crazy lopsidedness for over a year. I did every MOTN waking because there was nothing LO wanted but boob. I just don't know if I have it in me again. </p> <p>Did you approach BFing differently for LO2+? </p> <p>Did you feel this way while pregnant but then rally for BFing once baby arrived? </p>