https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Sat, 02 May 2026 07:21:40 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/anyone-deal-with-breast-refusal#post-570275 Sat, 16 Feb 2013 16:30:09 +0000 umlo 570275@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Been going through it with my LO for the past month. We had a very good rhythm the first 6 weeks but due to my oversupply and over active letdown, she screamed like crazy anytime I gave her my breast. She takes the bottle well. I tried bath times together, skin-to-skin, baby wearing, expressing milk in the corner of her mouth while trying to feed, pre-pumping, block feeding, the list goes on and on. My Dr and LC said to keep trying and that the hardwork will pay off but it's been a month now and I am highly considering exclusively pumping but even that comes with some hassles too. I wish I had some advice for you but keep trying and hopefully your LO will take your breast again. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/anyone-deal-with-breast-refusal#post-563012 Wed, 13 Feb 2013 03:02:50 +0000 erinpye 563012@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>An arched back is a pain response. Mine did this and we were told it was reflux, but it ended up being reflux and discomfort caused by a posterior tongue tie. Once that was fixed--a completely different baby, happy to nurse :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/anyone-deal-with-breast-refusal#post-561132 Mon, 11 Feb 2013 21:19:41 +0000 irene 561132@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@PurpleUnicorn: Yes, it happened to us and the first nursing strike started when LO was 4-5 months old. I blame teething but I definitely think I put him on a strict feeding schedule too. </p> <p>We tried everything: bathing together, skin to skin, offering breast in the tub, nursing while he's super tired; nursing while he woke from naps; nursing right before he goes down for nap; nursing him to sleep (so he associates breastfeeding with comfort); nursing in a dark quiet room; nursing in motion.</p> <p>It went from nursing strikes that lasts 1-4 days, to unpredictable rejection, to only nursing morning and evening (but still some hits and misses), to around 9-10 months he completely refused to breastfeed. I gave up pumping at that time and that was the end of it.</p> <p>If I were to do it all over again I'd definitely try to feed on demand. I think I stressed too much about "If I don't feed him at a certain certain time my milk will dry up because he didn't empty my breasts!". I got too obsessed with the stupid books I read so I wanted to make sure he eats at a certain time. A friend of mind feeds on demand and she's still BFing and they are beyond 1 year old. Her LO is definitely a lot more calmer than mine though so personality plays a part too.</p> <p>Best wishes to you and I hope you guys will have a long breastfeeding relationship! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/anyone-deal-with-breast-refusal#post-558336 Sat, 09 Feb 2013 21:25:33 +0000 Kemma 558336@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@PurpleUnicorn: @hilsy85: These babies are such tricky wee beasts!</p> <p>Miss A will nurse ok as long as I get her on to the boob straight after her nap although is easily distracted, but she won't take the second side (before or after a nappy change). I really want to avoid getting into the habit of nursing to sleep during the day but sometimes the only way she'll take the second breast is to nurse lying down before a nap which means I end up feeding roughly every 1.5 hours and if I don't nurse before a nap I worry she's not getting enough food / hydration (particularly when it's Summer in NZ!)</p> <p>I can totally understand why some Mum's put their babies onto a three hour feeding schedule, demand feeding is working out to be kinda difficult... </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/anyone-deal-with-breast-refusal#post-558327 Sat, 09 Feb 2013 21:16:41 +0000 hilsy85 558327@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Kemma: that site is great! I'm going to try some of her tips, as we've been dealing with major fussiness while nursing lately. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/anyone-deal-with-breast-refusal#post-558306 Sat, 09 Feb 2013 20:47:55 +0000 PurpleUnicorn 558306@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Kemma: thanks i will check out the site! and the cradle position is all i have ever used. i tried side lying a couple of times but i find it difficult to get comfortable, though last week when his refusal was getting to an extreme during the day i tried it again while skin to skin as well and he actually smiled at me and nursed for a few minutes, so it did work. i guess i should try to master it! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/anyone-deal-with-breast-refusal#post-558290 Sat, 09 Feb 2013 20:35:11 +0000 Kemma 558290@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@PurpleUnicorn: I stumbled across this blog post the other day and thought you might find it helpful?</p> <p><a href="http://nursememama.com/" rel="nofollow">http://nursememama.com/</a></p> <p>My LO is still doing a partial refusal when I try to cradle / cross cradle hold during the day but we have managed to master the side-lying position! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/anyone-deal-with-breast-refusal#post-557797 Sat, 09 Feb 2013 09:46:20 +0000 PurpleUnicorn 557797@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@regberadaisy: i hope that happens! i was so happy when i wrote my last comment, but the rest of yesterday was a bit rougher....i guess it was 2 steps forward, 1 step back and i am taking it all one day at a time. all i want is a happy baby and i will be as patient as necessary and do whatever it takes! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/anyone-deal-with-breast-refusal#post-556623 Fri, 08 Feb 2013 11:42:46 +0000 regberadaisy 556623@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Great that things are getting better! We went through 2 bouts of boob refusal and both tims she just kinda stopped on her own. Sometimes teething can cause it too. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/anyone-deal-with-breast-refusal#post-556617 Fri, 08 Feb 2013 11:39:15 +0000 PurpleUnicorn 556617@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>well things have been much better the past two days. i was reflecting a lot on what i had been doing differently and I realized that i was slowly trying to get him on a schedule and i think i was being too strict about it and delaying him when he was actually hungry by distracting him. I also had a routine of when he wakes up from a nap, i would do a diaper change, then give him tummy time - all before feeding him! i was doing tummy time then because if i do it after he eats, he spits up on the mat....anyway, i stopped both these and feed him as soon as he wakes (and looking back at my BF course notes, this is what i am supposed to - feed him as soon as he wakes up) and as a result, it has been going A LOT better!! And another thing i am doing is the second he shows any resistance, i stop trying to feed him, so there is no screaming, arching back, nothing. i just hold him and distract him and only try again when he is calm. A paci helps with calming sometimes and then he eats again. other times, it seems like he was just no longer hungry as he is happy to do something else!</p> <p>anyway, thanks everyone for sharing and i hope things continue to get better :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/anyone-deal-with-breast-refusal#post-553302 Thu, 07 Feb 2013 04:00:47 +0000 jetsettermomma 553302@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@purpleunicorn, we went through the exact same thing recently! It is heartbreaking :( My son is a little over 4 months and started rejecting my breast around 2 weeks ago. At first I attributed his short feedings to distractions and increased efficiency but then he started skipping feedings. I called his ped and was told to keep offering the breast. I was getting so paranoid that maybe my milk supply had dried up! One day I offered at 9am, 10am, 11am, 12pm, and 1pm and he rejected every single time! I thought there was no way he wasn't hungry so I gave him a bottle of ebf which he refused at first then started devouring. I called my lactation consultant and she thought it was due to his binky. So we cut out the binky cold turkey. It did help increase his feedings but he still wasn't too happy about being given the boob. This went on all last week. On Friday, we had his 4 month visit and he had his shots which resulted in him getting a fever the following day so we gave him baby Tylenol all weekend for the fever. On Monday it's like we got our old baby back! His appetite and energy returned, back to babbling a mile a minute (he had stopped being talkative the past couple of weeks). We're thinking now that he may have had a bug? Does your LO have a cold or congestion? I hope he gets over this hump soon! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/anyone-deal-with-breast-refusal#post-553290 Thu, 07 Feb 2013 03:09:50 +0000 autumn865 553290@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We went through this with DD around that time and it was aweful. She would just cry and get hysterical although I knew perfectly well she was hungry. DH would take her to calm down and I just felt like I was torturing her. At one point she was 100% rejecting my left side and only after a month of pumping she started again but only after doing some acrobatic positioning. I'm not sure really what made it better besides time and DD getting a little older. They were tough months but BFing can get better!</p> <p>I would rule out anything medical (ear infection, reflux etc) or consider things like if your let down is too fast (mine was) or supply (low supply or over supply). </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/anyone-deal-with-breast-refusal#post-553174 Wed, 06 Feb 2013 22:32:51 +0000 PurpleUnicorn 553174@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Kemma: i tried that last night and it worked for a couple of minutes, after a diaper change, i just leaned over him and he drank from me....but i certainly can't BF like that all that time! </p> <p>i am feeling a bit more hopeful now. just at 9pm, i was able to feed him for 7 minutes, then he pulled off. i tried to put him back and he got mad and refused, but i didn't push it at all, so he didn't scream or have a fit about it. DH took him for a bit and then he fell asleep and we put him to bed! So maybe he really was just full after 7 minutes.....let's see if he sleeps all night! usually i put him to bed between 930 and 10pm. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/anyone-deal-with-breast-refusal#post-553169 Wed, 06 Feb 2013 22:24:02 +0000 PurpleUnicorn 553169@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@BabyBoecksMom: aww, i am sorry you had to give up. i really hope i figure this out. i guess i have in a way, the most important thing is not to fight, i just hope everything goes back to normal :( </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/anyone-deal-with-breast-refusal#post-553168 Wed, 06 Feb 2013 22:22:47 +0000 PurpleUnicorn 553168@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>thanks for all the comments everyone. it's helpful to read all the different perspectives.<br /> @junebugmama: i actually only burp after he pulls off, i never pull him off to burp. when he stops drinking on his own, i burp, then try to put him back, that was usually our pattern. And I did wonder if he was just done after 7 minutes too. he was never one to eat for 40 minutes unless it was just comfort sucking, but that was not all the time. typically he eats for 10-15 minutes on one side and that would be enough to make him drunk. so now with these 5-7 minute sessions, i feel like it has been cut in half....but i know what the doctors/LCs would say - he is getting enough milk as long as he is producing enough wet and dirty diapers and he definitely is, that has not changed! I just really don't like how he acts when refusing, it really is heartbreaking. this afternoon he actually would not even look at me after refusing my breast. i calmed him down and tried again later and he ate for about 6-7 mins and was all drunk and then we went out and he all smiles and back to his old self again.....until this evening when it happened again.. but it's true, it is really hard to see my little baby act that way even though i know logically not to take it personally!</p> <p>@Maysprout: he is definitely grabbing at everything now, so maybe i will try giving him something to hold while nursing and see how that goes. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/anyone-deal-with-breast-refusal#post-553160 Wed, 06 Feb 2013 22:12:10 +0000 BabyBoecksMom 553160@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>DD started this around 5 months and it was a fight. Eventually, I gave up and just pumped because it became too stressful for both of us. She just wanted to explore and didn't want to be stuck facing me. </p> <p>It's super tough to deal with, but I hope your LO cones back around. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/anyone-deal-with-breast-refusal#post-553155 Wed, 06 Feb 2013 22:09:45 +0000 junebugmama 553155@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@PurpleUnicorn: Stop burping him. Don't take him off. It could just be a distraction issue. At this point in time he is becoming more aware of his surroundings and even if he's hungry he may be finding things more interesting. You could also try a nursing necklace to keep him focused on you</p> <p>Also, is he still swallowing at the 7 minutes? Right around 3-4 months babies become wildly efficient. My LO would feed for 30-40 minutes in the beginning. By 4 months he nurses for 5 minutes or less. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/anyone-deal-with-breast-refusal#post-553154 Wed, 06 Feb 2013 22:08:07 +0000 Maysprout 553154@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@PurpleUnicorn: Sometimes they just need to regroup.<br /> Especially as they start exploring the world, it can get tricky. When she was that age sometimes I'd calm her down and then give her something to feel in her hands or I'd play with her feet or sing a song, made funny faces, something for her to be mentally stimulated by while she nursed. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/anyone-deal-with-breast-refusal#post-553150 Wed, 06 Feb 2013 22:06:09 +0000 Kemma 553150@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My LO is sixteen weeks old and has been refusing the breast on and off since Sunday, apparently it's quite a common behaviour at this age. She too does the whole back arching thing and gets angry!</p> <p>For us I'm pretty sure it's related to teething (poor wee girl was miserable all day yesterday) and for some babies it can be the result of sore ears or an ear infection.</p> <p>What I've been doing is having three attempts at feeding LO then trying the other side and failing that I feed her by hanging my boob in her mouth while she lies on her back (unfortunately it's really not that comfortable).</p> <p>I know it's hard to see baby hungry and it sux to be rejected but it will pass so keep up the good work breastfeeding! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/anyone-deal-with-breast-refusal#post-553147 Wed, 06 Feb 2013 22:04:40 +0000 PurpleUnicorn 553147@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@junebugmama: i thought that might be part of the problem, so i am making sure to feed him ASAP now. The weird thing is that sometimes i will feed as soon as he wakes up (i even skipped diaper change after a nap and went straight to feed) and he fed okay for about 7 minutes, then i burp him, and he refuses to go back even though he still acts hungry.</p> <p>@Maysprout: yes, i definitely don't fight the arch anymore (as of yesterday), i am just wondering/hoping he stops doing this altogether! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/anyone-deal-with-breast-refusal#post-553139 Wed, 06 Feb 2013 22:01:44 +0000 Maysprout 553139@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>A little bit now and then. Maybe try different holds/positions. Sometimes I would just swaddle her and calm her down and then nurse her if she had gotten herself worked up into a tizzy, it's too hard to fight the back arch. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/anyone-deal-with-breast-refusal#post-553123 Wed, 06 Feb 2013 21:56:18 +0000 junebugmama 553123@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>It sounds like he may be getting too hungry...are you letting him cry or are you responding when he roots and give other cues? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/anyone-deal-with-breast-refusal#post-553083 Wed, 06 Feb 2013 21:29:27 +0000 PurpleUnicorn 553083@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Breastfeeding was going well from day one for me and LO. He is now almost 3 months old and starting I guess about 2 weeks ago, he started refusing my breast at some feedings. I didn't think too much about it at first, but it has gotten much worse in the past couple of days. He sleeps 9 hours at night, so when he wakes, we change him and then he BFs no problem. however for subsequent feedings it it has been hit or miss. I will try to bring him to breast like normal and he arches back and vehemently refuses. It is a very stressful ordeal because he continues to act very hungry so I keep trying.</p> <p>I started googling this and found that breast refusal does happen with some babies and all the advice is to have more skin to skin, wear him, feed him when sleepy, and basically don't try to force feed him at all. So I have been trying these things and it does work....but the problem is still there - sometimes when i try to feed him, he refuses, only i just let him be and wait till later. but it is hard to do when i can see he is clearly hungry.</p> <p>A couple of times I gave some expressed BM from a bottle and then he calmed down and was able to drink from my breast and also just giving him a paci worked a couple of times. sometimes nothing works.</p> <p>has anyone else dealt with this and did it eventually get better? </p>