https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Thu, 23 Apr 2026 13:05:01 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/anyone-elses-so-just-not-get-it-rant#post-1309583 Tue, 31 Dec 2013 09:35:13 +0000 wonderstruck 1309583@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I wouldn't have a problem with the video chats - much of the reason infants shouldn't have screen time is because they need to see how conversations and interactions work, and they get that with video chats - plus I'm assuming it's important to your husband, and I can see why. And I will admit that I'm guilty of occasionally setting my LO in front of a cartoon for a few minutes so that he will stop screaming bloody murder while I get dinner in the oven, fold a load of clothes, etc.</p> <p>But the watching TV with the baby thing is not cool with me, either, and I'd be pretty pissed at his comment about you sitting around watching TV all day, and basically insinuating that spending time with his daughter is boring. Come on dude...sing songs, read a book, play peek-a-boo, talk to her about her toys, etc. My DH used to be worse about this, but after a couple of talks where I explained to him that LO is much happier and naps better on days where the TV isn't on in the background because it's overwhelming for a baby, he's been a lot better about it. But I do try to make sure I say that nicely - even if I am annoyed, if I start snapping at him it never gets a good result. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/anyone-elses-so-just-not-get-it-rant#post-1309459 Tue, 31 Dec 2013 08:41:36 +0000 sea_bass 1309459@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I totally get it. My baby hasn't ever watched TV and my DH has no idea why this is important to me. But he respects my wishes and never lets him see screens. I love him for that :-) </p> <p>Babies watching TV really sets me off.. I would not have allowed it. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/anyone-elses-so-just-not-get-it-rant#post-1309389 Tue, 31 Dec 2013 07:56:32 +0000 Dandelion 1309389@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I don't think you should try and limit facetime with your DH's family and LO. That's a bit separate from screen time.</p> <p>And, at this age it isn't a big deal. It's hard for people to know what to do with a baby and holding it so that you can do something is good. Once baby is sitting, eating, crawling, he won't want to be watching tv. He'll be wanting to take down every bookshelf within reach.</p> <p>So, don't sweat it, now...he'll get the hang of it. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/anyone-elses-so-just-not-get-it-rant#post-1309341 Tue, 31 Dec 2013 06:31:39 +0000 Cherrybee 1309341@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We had the exact same argument! When I was pregnant I did a lot of research and was adamant that my child would have zero screen time. However, when she was born, DH took three weeks paternity leave and, of course, wanted the TV on all day. It really, really bothered me - even though she wasn't at all interested at that age! It wasn't how it supposed to be!! </p> <p>Anyway, by the time she got to about 6 weeks, she started looking at the TV. I didn't have it on all day when DH was at work but when he got in he would put the TV on. She was colicky back then and DH realised that putting her in the carrier, facing outwards towards the TV, and dancing to the music channels calmed her. She would stare at the TV and relax. It really, really bothered me - like LOADS! </p> <p>No matter what I said, he would not see my point of view. I showed him the AAP guidelines, he said they were a load of rubbish. I told him about the detrimental effect, he asked for evidence. I showed him my BFF's (adorable) baby who says no real words at 1 year old and stares at the TV all day, he said "our baby wont do that". </p> <p>Then one day, when LO was 10 weeks old, I came downstairs to find that he had put her in her bouncy chair, stuck it right in front of the TV and had put kids TV on. She was smiling and cooing and.... I was furious with him but how could I insist he turn it off when she was so happy?? DH justified it by saying that it made her happy and kept her quiet. Ugh. From then on, I reluctantly agreed that she could have 30 minutes of kids TV a day (and of course it was always on when DH was home)..... </p> <p>..... Anyway, long story short, as she got older she got more interesting. She started laughing when you tickle her, smiling when daddy came in, playing with her feet - and all of a sudden, DH didn't want to keep her quiet or give her something to look at other than him!! At 5 months, she has hardly any screen time at all. When he gets in, he plays with her and she squeals with delight. </p> <p>So I guess what I'm trying to say (in this novel) is: </p> <p>1) Yes, my DH was the same. </p> <p>2) Don't worry too much at this point - he probably won't want to watch TV with her when she is more interactive. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/anyone-elses-so-just-not-get-it-rant#post-1309338 Tue, 31 Dec 2013 06:26:29 +0000 MrsMccarthy 1309338@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I feel like its really hard when they are that young to know how to keep things going. I would try to find a happy medium and not be angry at him. It will only make him defensive. Instead try to think of ways to be creative and making playing with her fun. Put on music and dance her around when he is in te room or get some cute books he can read to baby. My husband used to read HIS books to our son when he was tiny. They love the sound of your voice and at that age it doesn't matter what you read about or say so it can be adult themes. Are there magazines he likes! Even those would be better and ill bet baby would love the sound of the pages. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/anyone-elses-so-just-not-get-it-rant#post-1309335 Tue, 31 Dec 2013 06:17:26 +0000 mrbee 1309335@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I was like that... we used a lot of screentime (YouTube and Netflix, mostly) early on because I didn't know what I was doing. It took me some time to learn how to interact with an infant!</p> <p>By the time #2 came along, I rarely ever did screentime with the kids. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/anyone-elses-so-just-not-get-it-rant#post-1309329 Tue, 31 Dec 2013 04:59:23 +0000 mrs.shinerbock 1309329@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>DH and I have had many conversations over the years about limiting screen time - ever since he whipped out his phone to entertain his 5 mo old nephew, He's always agreed and talks about how all his nephew (now 2.5 yrs) does is watch TV and play games on the phone. I've mentioned several times how the various groups say that screen time for infants should be minimized and that includes TV, games and videos, and video chatting. And in the last three weeks, I've brought up how I am trying not to watch TV while our 8 week old is awake because her eyes have started tracking to the sound and because she gets so much screen time skypeing, I'd like to minimize everything else.</p> <p>Practically all he does is screen time with her! He video chats with his family at least an hour everyday and if she is not eating, the he's holding her so his family can see her. (And I don't want to limit how much time he chats with his family.). The whole week that we were at my parents, if he was holding her, he was sitting on the couch watching tv. When we got home, I snapped at him when he picked her up after feeding and said " let's go watch some tv." When I said I preferred that they not watch tv, he said "isn't that what you do all day? What am I supposed to do, sit around bored with her all night?" WTH! No, you should interact with your daughter! And, as I've mentioned several times, I'm NOT watching tv while she is awake, I'm playing with her or trying to get her to hang out in the carrier so I can do some laundry. </p> <p>Sorry, just needed to vent. DH is typically very good with taking care of her and diapers and such. </p>