https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Thu, 09 Apr 2026 21:27:41 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/are-we-bad-parents-for-not-wanting-a-1st-birthday-party/page/2#post-941276 Thu, 18 Jul 2013 10:03:35 +0000 Vegmama 941276@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'd rather just have a cocktail party!! :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/are-we-bad-parents-for-not-wanting-a-1st-birthday-party/page/2#post-941255 Thu, 18 Jul 2013 09:59:17 +0000 LuLu Mom 941255@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We are cheating and using her first birthday party as an excuse to throw our annual BBQ we do every year! So where it is honoring her, in reality it's a get together for us and our family/friends too! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/are-we-bad-parents-for-not-wanting-a-1st-birthday-party/page/2#post-941136 Thu, 18 Jul 2013 09:34:58 +0000 ElbieKay 941136@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>As a non-parent, I have always found first birthday parties to be very tedious. They might even be worse than showers. I don't see why we would bother to do anything beyond inviting our parents over for dinner. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/are-we-bad-parents-for-not-wanting-a-1st-birthday-party/page/2#post-941040 Thu, 18 Jul 2013 09:18:00 +0000 wahine08 941040@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I don't think so at all! I've been to so many and the baby usually just gets cranky and irritated with all the people and noise.</p> <p>I didn't have a birthday party until I was 8 years old! When I did, I was REALLY into it and meant the world to me- I still remember it to this day. I don't plan on giving LO tons of parties. Of course, family dinners or get togethers- but nothing big. Maybe just every few years for the big parties and when they are old enough to socialize with other kiddies. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/are-we-bad-parents-for-not-wanting-a-1st-birthday-party/page/2#post-940998 Thu, 18 Jul 2013 09:11:50 +0000 mrs. wagon 940998@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Haha definitely not!! I love planning parties, but planning a party when you have an almost 1 year old is not exactly easy. In our culture the first birthday party is a big huge celebration so we had to have one for both, with lots of family coming even from far away for a party for a few hours to celebrate a one year old. </p> <p>I hate cake smashes too...!! But I did one at WJ's party... we didn't do one at LMW's party but we did one yesterday on her actual birthday. In her highchair, with a bib on, and straight into the tub afterwards. It goes against everything I'm about, but in the end it was cute to watch them have their first taste of sugar.</p> <p>Still... frosting between the fingers... *shudder* </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/are-we-bad-parents-for-not-wanting-a-1st-birthday-party/page/2#post-940799 Thu, 18 Jul 2013 08:24:00 +0000 blackbird 940799@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Yes, you are an awful parent b/c you don't want a party!!!!</p> <p>Seriously, no big deal. Everyone knows the party is still for the parents at that age! The kid hardly knows what's going on aside from there being cake around :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/are-we-bad-parents-for-not-wanting-a-1st-birthday-party/page/2#post-940675 Thu, 18 Jul 2013 07:46:10 +0000 Grace 940675@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I completely agree with you. About the cake smash too. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/are-we-bad-parents-for-not-wanting-a-1st-birthday-party/page/2#post-940661 Thu, 18 Jul 2013 07:42:52 +0000 regberadaisy 940661@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Not at all! I think whatever you guys do as long as you do <i>something</i> ;) will be perfectly great!</p> <p>We threw a big party because we <i>wanted</i> to and LO had a great time! But she would've had a great time even if it was just grandparents and us. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/are-we-bad-parents-for-not-wanting-a-1st-birthday-party/page/2#post-940652 Thu, 18 Jul 2013 07:40:55 +0000 BKCaribBaby 940652@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I will be bad parent with you. I currently don't plan on having one for many of the reasons already mentioned. There are lots of ways to be a good parent. :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/are-we-bad-parents-for-not-wanting-a-1st-birthday-party/page/2#post-940565 Thu, 18 Jul 2013 07:06:31 +0000 bushelandapeck 940565@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think it's fine either way. In our circle of friends, first birthdays are huge. We are planning to have one with family and close friends with kids. It will probably still be pretty big but we are planning a simple BBQ and I'm making DS cake. I hope it's not too stressful. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/are-we-bad-parents-for-not-wanting-a-1st-birthday-party/page/2#post-940552 Thu, 18 Jul 2013 07:00:01 +0000 edelweiss 940552@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>we're not going to throw a 1st birthday party either--we'll do something special, but just us and grandparents. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/are-we-bad-parents-for-not-wanting-a-1st-birthday-party/page/2#post-940510 Thu, 18 Jul 2013 06:30:05 +0000 girlinred 940510@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My husband and I were just discussing this the other day because our neighbor had a bunch of balloons and a "1st Birthday!" sign outside for everyone to see. When we have our first, we don't plan on having a big party, either. Maybe a nice dinner for us for surviving a year of parenthood! :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/are-we-bad-parents-for-not-wanting-a-1st-birthday-party/page/2#post-940437 Thu, 18 Jul 2013 02:27:14 +0000 AprilFool 940437@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Not at all! I will be having a party for LO but it will be for me. We don't have friends with kids really so it will just be a normal adult gathering. </p> <p>I know she won't remember it but she will be able to look at photos but really I want an gorgeous dessert table and pretty decorations. Haha </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/are-we-bad-parents-for-not-wanting-a-1st-birthday-party/page/2#post-940424 Thu, 18 Jul 2013 01:45:42 +0000 sarac 940424@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Nope. First birthday party was a nice family gathering in a park. Second birthday is when it starts to be about the kid, imho. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/are-we-bad-parents-for-not-wanting-a-1st-birthday-party/page/2#post-940383 Thu, 18 Jul 2013 00:11:10 +0000 lemondrop 940383@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>No way, I had enough on my hands just surviving a 12 month old :)</p> <p>Both sets of grandparents happened to be in town, so they came over along with my brother, we went out to brunch, and we ate cupcakes after his nap. He was on the verge of melting down several times that day, I don't know how we could have gotten through something bigger without tears from both me and him! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/are-we-bad-parents-for-not-wanting-a-1st-birthday-party/page/2#post-940364 Wed, 17 Jul 2013 23:33:50 +0000 lamariniere 940364@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>DS's 1st and 2nd birthday parties just involved us and one set of grandparents. I made cake and he had a few presents. I was no big deal. DS's birthday also falls on 12/29, so most people aren't around/available anyway. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/are-we-bad-parents-for-not-wanting-a-1st-birthday-party/page/2#post-940302 Wed, 17 Jul 2013 22:33:51 +0000 meganmp 940302@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I can't stand 1st birthday parties where many people are invited. Why on earth would my friends want to come over to celebrate this? It drives me crazy to go to them, and I really like kids. At this point, my kids don't have other friends, and they have no idea what is going on. 1st birthday parties are for parents, and if you don't want one, you are not a bad parent (and I bet many of your friends will thank you for not having one). </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/are-we-bad-parents-for-not-wanting-a-1st-birthday-party/page/2#post-940276 Wed, 17 Jul 2013 22:04:48 +0000 CupQuakeWalk 940276@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Polish: we' re not having one!!<br /> We might go out to eat as a family (grandparents too) and have cake at home. No cake smash or anything...no party.</p> <p>I do plan on having a HUGE party for him when he can remember. Maybe 4th or 5th birthday. We will do clowns, bounce houses, all that jazz.<br /> And then every year after that it'll probably be a pizza party with cousins or something. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/are-we-bad-parents-for-not-wanting-a-1st-birthday-party/page/2#post-940256 Wed, 17 Jul 2013 21:54:12 +0000 anewme 940256@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>No you are not a bad parent!!! We threw our daughter a big 1st bday and then a smaller 2nd bday party. We're also doing a big-ish 1st bday for my son too but it's only because I love event planning and genuinely have fun doing it. But if I didn't I would not stress myself out or give into any pressure to do so just because someone's fancy blog sets absurdly high expectations. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/are-we-bad-parents-for-not-wanting-a-1st-birthday-party/page/2#post-940147 Wed, 17 Jul 2013 21:07:31 +0000 silver1 940147@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Same here no big party I would like to have just have a small family get together for his 1st b'day. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/are-we-bad-parents-for-not-wanting-a-1st-birthday-party#post-940120 Wed, 17 Jul 2013 20:49:02 +0000 skipper2010 940120@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Nope. I feel the exact same way! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/are-we-bad-parents-for-not-wanting-a-1st-birthday-party#post-940118 Wed, 17 Jul 2013 20:48:14 +0000 Ginabean3 940118@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Not at all! I think it just depends on the family! We plan on just doing a regular ole BBQ and having a cake for her to smash. For some reason I'm really excited about the cake smashing! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/are-we-bad-parents-for-not-wanting-a-1st-birthday-party#post-940075 Wed, 17 Jul 2013 20:32:28 +0000 Mrs. Yoyo 940075@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Haha not at alllllll ... I think this one of these things where blogs give a skewed perception of reality. Most people aren't throwing fancy parties for young kids, if they throw one at all. We had a very low-key family party for LO's 1st and nothing for his 2nd! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/are-we-bad-parents-for-not-wanting-a-1st-birthday-party#post-940046 Wed, 17 Jul 2013 20:20:06 +0000 Kimberlybee 940046@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Oh I guess to answer your question: No you are not bad parents for not wanting a big first birthday, you do what you have to do to make you a happy and stress-free mommy. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/are-we-bad-parents-for-not-wanting-a-1st-birthday-party#post-940041 Wed, 17 Jul 2013 20:16:58 +0000 Kimberlybee 940041@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think throwing parties can be really stressful and it's better if you really enjoy doing it. My love for event planning started with me being part of the "Entertainment Committee" at the office for my department, combined with my love for arts and crafts, helping others plan parties is very therapeutic for me! I threw 4 babyshowers in 2011 when I was at my lowest emotionally. Celebrating life events with others helped me to keep my sadness at bay when I had my miscarriage that year. But it was very expensive and I don't offer my party planning services anymore because it takes a lot of time, effort, and money! So celebrating with family only can be very special too!!! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/are-we-bad-parents-for-not-wanting-a-1st-birthday-party#post-940036 Wed, 17 Jul 2013 20:13:59 +0000 honeybear 940036@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think LO *might* get his first party on his third birthday. Our families all live far away, so for his first we had some cake (no smash--I am a stickler about food not being smeared on his face!), and got the grandparents on video chat. We planned the day so that we did all the stuff he enjoyed--went to the beach, hung out on the swings, etc. His 2d birthday went similarly. He has some actual friends of his own now and they do a birthday walk at school, so I think he'll be more into it this year. But I'm only inviting one or two little guests (and their siblings). ;) </p> <p>We've been guests at two birthday parties for the 1-2yo set this year and we were the only non-family guests at both! I think maybe the big birthday is not as common as the Internet suggests. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/are-we-bad-parents-for-not-wanting-a-1st-birthday-party#post-939982 Wed, 17 Jul 2013 19:51:54 +0000 Mrs. Twine 939982@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think you are just fine. And if not, I am right in the same bad parenting boat as you are. I just made cupcakes and Lorelei's favorite meal and we had Eric's parents and his sister and her family of four over for lunch and dessert. It was inexpensive, all the people Lorelei would have cared to see were present, it was low-key-- it had everything to recommend it! Since Ellie has been older she always gets two parties; one for family only (so grandparents and us) and one for friends, which her cousins always come to. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/are-we-bad-parents-for-not-wanting-a-1st-birthday-party#post-939953 Wed, 17 Jul 2013 19:40:08 +0000 MrsStormy 939953@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Thats our plan too. I'm going with the birthday party/ family party every other year plan, so those two things will rotate. I think 1 is the perfect year for family party, so that's our plan as well. Big picture our families are really the ones who will care about lo's bday, I would rather spend the money on 1 yr photos or something, and I am not but nature a hostess, and I am a stresser, all that put together= no big 1 yr bday party! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/are-we-bad-parents-for-not-wanting-a-1st-birthday-party#post-939935 Wed, 17 Jul 2013 19:31:46 +0000 JessKas 939935@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I don't think it's such a big deal. I know when I was little all my parents did was have a cake and a few neighbors. It was no fuss/no big deal. It seems like a lot of the parties nowadays get out of hand and are stressful. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/are-we-bad-parents-for-not-wanting-a-1st-birthday-party#post-939931 Wed, 17 Jul 2013 19:29:41 +0000 cascademom 939931@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Nope, not at all. We're doing a very small family thing at my parents' house. The thought of a big kids party for a one year old was giving me too much anxiety. We've had a tough year, so the last thing on my mind was throwing a huge party for my LO. DH and I agreed about the party size, so that's been good. </p>