https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Fri, 24 Apr 2026 05:22:03 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/are-your-kids-appreciative-and-grateful#post-2235045 Mon, 13 Jul 2015 13:12:51 +0000 sarac 2235045@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My daughter has been taught to be gracious and appreciative and at 3, she does a pretty good job. She's reliable with her pleases and thank yous, she's not overly entitled, she doesn't have a fit when we say no to something in a store. She has a growing understanding of the fact that the best parts of our lives together are experiences and not the stuff we buy. </p> <p>I believe that modeling these things is good, but that you have to set the expectation and stick to it. I know a shocking amount of children who aren't consistently expected to be polite and gracious, and some of them are just rude beyond measure. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/are-your-kids-appreciative-and-grateful#post-2235019 Mon, 13 Jul 2015 12:54:22 +0000 hilsy85 2235019@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Rainbow Sprinkles: yep I agree. </p> <p>How would you judge whether they are appreciative? I think some of it is developmental...like, if my LO asks what toy his grandparents brought for him on their visit to our house, I don't think that means he's spoiled and greedy--I think that means that they often bring him toys, and so it's a fair question for him to ask. And even getting upset over that is normal I think. </p> <p>I think generally being appreciative of people doing things for you is the biggest thing that really young kids can do--like saying thank you and being polite when people give them meals, help them do something, take them someplace they've been asking to go. And also showing their appreciation by doing nice things for others (although that may just be my love language of acts of service showing! :silly: ). </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/are-your-kids-appreciative-and-grateful#post-2234909 Mon, 13 Jul 2015 12:03:04 +0000 Freckles 2234909@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Sometimes out of the blue DD will ask me who got her the toy/book she is playing with, and then she will say, "thank you for buying me x toy". Most often, we have to prompt her thank yous. I don't think she is really appreciative/grateful and we think it's because she has so many things. DH and I have talked about taking a break from buying her any toys for a whole year. We try to have talks with her every day to address empathy, gratitude, etc. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/are-your-kids-appreciative-and-grateful#post-2234908 Mon, 13 Jul 2015 12:01:54 +0000 Truth Bombs 2234908@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@.twist.: I find that modeling the behavior I want from her is most effective in teaching LO lessons. But it's not like I'm regularly mean to her so I don't get a lot of oppotunities to apologize to her! And I don't want to apologize to her when she's upset/disappointed about something like not being allowed to have 7 million cookies. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/are-your-kids-appreciative-and-grateful#post-2234894 Mon, 13 Jul 2015 11:56:45 +0000 Rainbow Sprinkles 2234894@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I feel like those are big emotions/characteristics to slap on to kids as young as mine (3 and 19 months) because they probably don't know what it means yet to be "appreciate of the life they have." It's not like they know that they could have much less, or even that mom and dad work hard to make money to provide for them,</p> <p>But they certainly say thank you a lot, and to everyone! They're very polite kids. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/are-your-kids-appreciative-and-grateful#post-2234827 Mon, 13 Jul 2015 11:12:33 +0000 .twist. 2234827@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Truth Bombs: We are struggling with taking responsibility of our actions with our older boys. I'm at a total loss as to what to do. Fruuuustrating. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/are-your-kids-appreciative-and-grateful#post-2234742 Mon, 13 Jul 2015 10:10:02 +0000 looch 2234742@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My son has manners, but I wouldn't say he's grateful for the life he has. I do think he is spoiled in terms of attention, it's hard because he's an only child and I actually like to spend time with him. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/are-your-kids-appreciative-and-grateful#post-2234720 Mon, 13 Jul 2015 09:49:15 +0000 mrsjyw 2234720@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think he's starting to grasp the concept. He says please/thank you without being prompted. Especially at mealtimes (which totally melts my heart and makes me want to cook him ALLTHETHINGS!). But I think as far as on the daily, it's going to be a lesson that grows over time. DH and I were just talking about kids these days have so much handed to them that they're not really given the opportunity to know what it's like not to have those things/activities/etc. So you can't really say they're not appreciative any more or less than when we were growing up because they're given things/activities more readily than in our childhood. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/are-your-kids-appreciative-and-grateful#post-2234718 Mon, 13 Jul 2015 09:48:48 +0000 Truth Bombs 2234718@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think she is to the extent that a 2.5 year old can be. She's really great about saying thank you and she rarely acts entitled to things (asks nicely, shares well with her friends, etc). I don't think she has an appreciation for how privledged her life is but at 2.5 I don't think she can really understand that concept. We intend to make philanthropy/volunteerism a part of her upbringing so she will gain appreciation for the life she has been lucky enough to have, but we're just not there yet. </p> <p>What we are struggling with right now is taking responsibility for actions. She will apologize to me for ever little accident (spilling something, bumping in to me) but when she actually does something wrong on purpose she clams up and looks at the ground when I try to get her to apologize. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/are-your-kids-appreciative-and-grateful#post-2234712 Mon, 13 Jul 2015 09:41:36 +0000 mrbee 2234712@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Was talking to another parent this weekend about this - he said that his kids aren't spoiled but he wouldn't really call them appreciative/grateful either. They're somewhere in between.</p> <p>I'd say that's true about my kids too! We're working on this right now, but it's not easy to know where to start. There's a ton of books and resources about how to make sure your kids aren't spoiled, but not that much on how to grow their sense of appreciation/gratitude.</p> <p>Are your kids appreciative and grateful? </p>