https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Sun, 12 Apr 2026 19:26:48 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/at-what-point-do-you-admit-defeat-in-nap-training-and-where-do-we-go-from-here#post-1971881 Thu, 04 Dec 2014 23:26:39 +0000 Mrs. High Heels 1971881@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mae: I haven't read through all the responses, but it looks like she's having a difficult time sleeping past that 1st sleep cycle of 45 min. Are you letting her cry when she wakes up at that 45 min mark, or do you only let her cry when you're putting her down for an initial nap?</p> <p>Usually if my kids wake after 45 min, I'll wait at least 10-15 min and most of the time, they'll go back to sleep on their own. </p> <p>Also, have you tried the 2-3-4 method? That worked out really well for J starting around 6.5 months... it's essentially a 2-nap schedule. </p> <p>2 hours after wake time is nap #1<br /> 3 hours after that is nap #2<br /> then 4 hours between nap #2 and bedtime (this last stretch can be tough sometimes... if it's too hard you can always do a little 30 min catnap somewhere here to get her to bedtime).</p> <p>Hopefully tomorrow is a better day! I wouldn't give up quite yet! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/at-what-point-do-you-admit-defeat-in-nap-training-and-where-do-we-go-from-here#post-1971878 Thu, 04 Dec 2014 23:24:09 +0000 twoofeverything 1971878@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Yeah, ditto @Smurfette. Nap training was the hardest thing I've done.<br /> You can win this! You've gotta win this :wink: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/at-what-point-do-you-admit-defeat-in-nap-training-and-where-do-we-go-from-here#post-1971875 Thu, 04 Dec 2014 23:21:21 +0000 loveisstrange 1971875@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>C was a great night sleeper and a TERRIBLE napper. Like... so bad. It happens. Sometimes kids are only good at one or the other. </p> <p>Id definitely try taking her down to 2 naps. We dropped to 2 2 hr naps at 6 months and that was when things really straightened out for us. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/at-what-point-do-you-admit-defeat-in-nap-training-and-where-do-we-go-from-here#post-1971873 Thu, 04 Dec 2014 23:19:38 +0000 Applesandbananas 1971873@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mae: she's only a baby once, let her sleep on you :)</p> <p>My LO is 20m and still vastly prefers Mama naps and I love the extra snuggles! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/at-what-point-do-you-admit-defeat-in-nap-training-and-where-do-we-go-from-here#post-1971864 Thu, 04 Dec 2014 23:14:07 +0000 Suzanne44 1971864@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mae: We did Ferber for our 6 month old. Nap and nighttime and getting rid of the soother and rocking and the whole shebang. Naps took a little longer than nights to work out. I would give it more time if you feel you have it in you. If you don't want to do it anymore then that's ok too.</p> <p>Are you trying the naps for 30 minutes and then getting her up like Ferber suggests? I had to ditch some of what he said about the naps because it just wasn't working for us. But it all worked out in the end. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/at-what-point-do-you-admit-defeat-in-nap-training-and-where-do-we-go-from-here#post-1971190 Thu, 04 Dec 2014 16:00:39 +0000 BabyBoecksMom 1971190@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mae: Honestly, I think you've given it a *really* good try. I honestly think that there are just some kids that don't sleep/nap train well. I really do think she'll grow out of it at some point, but I can't tell you when that will be because it's different for every baby. I'm sorry you're still going through it, but I hope some progress is made soon. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/at-what-point-do-you-admit-defeat-in-nap-training-and-where-do-we-go-from-here#post-1971158 Thu, 04 Dec 2014 15:42:15 +0000 Mae 1971158@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>So she slept 1.5 hrs. </p> <p>I think that I might try a 2 nap schedule tomorrow and see how that works. Maybe she just needs to be more tired to fall asleep? Seems worth a shot..? :/ </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/at-what-point-do-you-admit-defeat-in-nap-training-and-where-do-we-go-from-here#post-1970993 Thu, 04 Dec 2014 14:22:09 +0000 Pumpkin Pie 1970993@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Since it seems like 2 weeks is normal for nap training, I say give it at least 2 weeks. You've done so much work already that I think it's worth it to push through. If it hasn't gotten better after 2 weeks you can try again at a later time. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/at-what-point-do-you-admit-defeat-in-nap-training-and-where-do-we-go-from-here#post-1970920 Thu, 04 Dec 2014 13:55:48 +0000 Orchid 1970920@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Oh! And there were a few comments from family over Thanksgiving. MIL even popped into our room and saw the process. It irked me that my SIL/BIL said that, "oh, you know he's sleep just about anywhere, with anyone of he was tired enough." Their kids don't get put down for naps and go to bed at ridiculous hours (and wake up at the crack of dawn). I just said, "getting him age-appropriate amounts of sleep is important to me, so I make sacrifices to ensure that he naps adequately." </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/at-what-point-do-you-admit-defeat-in-nap-training-and-where-do-we-go-from-here#post-1970912 Thu, 04 Dec 2014 13:50:03 +0000 meredithNYC 1970912@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>If you are happy rocking her for every nap, then keep on doing it. I wouldn't share any info about your LO's naps if you don't want unwarranted advice. Sucks, but I think that's the only way to go. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/at-what-point-do-you-admit-defeat-in-nap-training-and-where-do-we-go-from-here#post-1970911 Thu, 04 Dec 2014 13:49:44 +0000 Orchid 1970911@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Like @Canoli: I'm nursing my 9 month old to sleep and holding him (attached to the boob a lot of times) through two naps (occasionally 3). It's really crazy (I hang my head in shame) so I have some sense of what you're going through. To be honest, I've come to really enjoy our little nap time! :-) We look into each others' eyes, I stroke his head, we smile and he dozes off so sweetly. Then I whip out my phone, enjoy some HB, catch up with friends via text, do some Pinteresting or even take a little nap. If baby was sleeping on his own, I'd probably be cooking or cleaning and wouldn't have that downtime. See how desperate I am to rationalize this craziness??</p> <p>I want to cheer you on and say continue with the training! But ultimately you know your baby and may be sensing that she's not ready? Do what makes you happy! Maybe consider delaying until she's ready for 2 naps? Maybe just enjoy the cuddles while they last. I don't know. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/at-what-point-do-you-admit-defeat-in-nap-training-and-where-do-we-go-from-here#post-1970901 Thu, 04 Dec 2014 13:44:41 +0000 Mae 1970901@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Anagram: oy the sleep too much thing. I can't count how many times i've been told "I've never seen a baby sleep so much!" My family are not the nap schedule type. They are the let the kid pass out wherever they are when they are so tired they can't keep their eyes open anymore type. Which is fine for them. But my baby is much much happier when she is well rested! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/at-what-point-do-you-admit-defeat-in-nap-training-and-where-do-we-go-from-here#post-1970890 Thu, 04 Dec 2014 13:38:33 +0000 Anagram 1970890@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mae: You definitely have to do what works for you, and don't worry about all the other people with "easy" babies. What I've learned in my very unscientific surveys of friends is that everyone really does something different.</p> <p>Even now that my LO is 16 months, my friends and family with kids have done such different things with naps--some kids are already out of naps completely. Some are on 1 nap, some are on 2. Some will only cosleep. Some will only sleep in the car or stroller. Some will only sleep alone, in a dark room, with white noise (that's mine).</p> <p>My family sometimes thinks I try to get my LO to sleep too much, but I think it's crazy that they apparently never put their babies down to sleep--they would just get so exhausted they would pass out wherever they were. My Lo goes to bed at 7-7:30 and some of their don't go till 10 pm. I mean, we're all doing what works best for our LOs and our family. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/at-what-point-do-you-admit-defeat-in-nap-training-and-where-do-we-go-from-here#post-1970871 Thu, 04 Dec 2014 13:31:03 +0000 Mae 1970871@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@BabyTsMom: if she was going down okay-ish and just waking up early but then happy enough between naps I'd been fine with short naps. It's just that she's fighting naps so hard, skipping so many AND short naps + being so crazy cranky and tired between then.. I feel like she isn't getting what she needs. And I guess the main reason I'm trying to nap train (besides getting ppl off my back lol) is that I'm applying for jobs and have no idea when I'm going back to work. Could be 1 month or 6. And ideally I'd love if she could sleep on her own before she started daycare to make the transition less crappy for her. </p> <p>@Canoli: you are so sweet! I don't feel like things have been that terribly hard on me... maybe i just complain a lot? lol but honestly I know Fia is a challenging baby but I always say she's 10% cuter than she is hard. So it all comes out okay... it just means she's REALLY REALLY cute :) </p> <p>Also now I'm confused. She cried through her first nap attempt. Fell asleep in 15 min on second nap attempt-- no crying. But only slept 30 min and woke up crying and cranky. Fell asleep in 35 min for the next nap attempt (kicked around 30, cried 5, then fell immediately to sleep after her check). If this nap is decent length I may continue to try for a few more days. I'm wondering if maybe I should adjust my approach. Instead of putting her down as soon as she seems tired, maybe try to stretch out for 2 naps instead of 3. Maybe if she's more tired she goes down easier? Seems like maybe. Worth trying anyways. Maybe? Gah why don't babies come with manuals lol. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/at-what-point-do-you-admit-defeat-in-nap-training-and-where-do-we-go-from-here#post-1970858 Thu, 04 Dec 2014 13:25:26 +0000 winniebee 1970858@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>At 6m I would just stick with it! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/at-what-point-do-you-admit-defeat-in-nap-training-and-where-do-we-go-from-here#post-1970832 Thu, 04 Dec 2014 13:15:51 +0000 Canoli 1970832@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I just want to say that I have followed your many posts on all of the difficulties that you have had with your baby and just offer a big huge hug! I feel so bad that you have had so many struggles. But I will say that you have to be one of the most dedicated, determined mothers out there. You have given all of yourself and all of your being to her to help her with all of the difficulties. Hug yourself and be kind to yourself. Parenting is so hard. those people who want to comment on your parenting should mind their own business. They should try to walk in your shoes for one hour, one day, one week! Maybe then they will see how hard it is. Babies do not do what we want them and damn it it's hard. It really annoys me when people say to do this or do that. If it was that easy you would have already done it! Ok sorry rant over! Do what you need to do for yourself and your household. You know what's best! </p> <p>This comes from the lady who nurses her baby to sleep for naps and nighttime and my baby stays attached the whole nap. You can imagine what people have to say about that but I'm doing what works! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/at-what-point-do-you-admit-defeat-in-nap-training-and-where-do-we-go-from-here#post-1970810 Thu, 04 Dec 2014 13:07:32 +0000 BabyTsMom 1970810@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My lo went through a phase of needing to be held for all naps too. He used to take good naps that way, until it stopped working so well. When I moved him to his crib, he went from taking 1-2 plus hour naps on me to 30-40min naps in the crib. For a while. Gradually he started napping longer. So I think the short naps in the crib may actually be a transition thing for her. I know you're used to her napping much longer and she probably is happier when she does, but maybe be this is just part of her learning process. Sorry that I have no advice. I would stick it out though. Unless you're absolutely OK with holding her still and it's still working- then as you wrote above, it's really not a big deal to you then why train? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/at-what-point-do-you-admit-defeat-in-nap-training-and-where-do-we-go-from-here#post-1970571 Thu, 04 Dec 2014 11:38:31 +0000 Mrs. Champagne 1970571@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mae: I didn't really have to do too much training, so no real advice on that--- but I did find going into his room a few minutes before nap time and reading him a book with his soother in his mouth (he only gets it for sleep) calmed things down and signaled that it was almost nap time.</p> <p>Good luck! :goodluck: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/at-what-point-do-you-admit-defeat-in-nap-training-and-where-do-we-go-from-here#post-1970559 Thu, 04 Dec 2014 11:34:15 +0000 Mamasig 1970559@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I never nap trained and since I WOH I don't have to deal with my mom does, so of course take this all with a grain of salt! But I would try a couple more days and if it doesn't work try again next month. Babies change very quickly. I remember wondering when DS1 would sleep past 30 minutes. Well one day he did. I remember when I couldn't transfer him from the car while he was sleeping. Now he doesn't stir. </p> <p>If it doesn't work, hold her, and screw what others say. You won't spoil her and if you don't mind then do it. She will grow out of it eventually. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/at-what-point-do-you-admit-defeat-in-nap-training-and-where-do-we-go-from-here#post-1970533 Thu, 04 Dec 2014 11:27:31 +0000 Mae 1970533@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@twodoghouse: I wish! Sigh. I just want this to work. I just wish that the days were maybe getting a LITTLE better. Or even 2 steps forward 1 step back. I could work with that. I just feel like with each day getting worse I'm torturing her and me for nothing. :( Even Brian last night was like yea this is a huge fail. And he's generally the "short term pain for long term gain, stick with it!" one in this relationship. I said I wanted to try one more day (today) and see how it went... but so far we had nap fail for 1st attempt. She fell asleep for 2nd attempt but woke up after 30 min crying :( gah. And yea christmas may be rough if we're still doing this. Bc my glider is the only thing that makes rocking her for 4+ hours/day okay (okay the glider and kindle). And there is nowhere so comfy to sit for hours. and hours. and hours. at my parents house. If I give up after today I may maybe start trying to see if I can wear her for naps? She used to do it when she was really little but hasn't since she was about 8 weeks. But I see other babies sleeping in wraps, so maybe she could learn that? At least then I could move around and maybe get things done (quietly)? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/at-what-point-do-you-admit-defeat-in-nap-training-and-where-do-we-go-from-here#post-1970462 Thu, 04 Dec 2014 11:06:56 +0000 twodoghouse 1970462@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Oh man, I was hoping you'd figure all this nap training stuff out and tell me how to do it. I keep saying we're going to do it then chickening out. I just hope we can figure something out soon because naps at Thanksgiving were a disaster and I want Christmas to be better! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/at-what-point-do-you-admit-defeat-in-nap-training-and-where-do-we-go-from-here#post-1970445 Thu, 04 Dec 2014 10:59:29 +0000 Madison43 1970445@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We did not sleep train, but I wanted to chime in and say that we went through a really weird nap period around that time. We had always rocked LO to sleep but suddenly she woke up every single time we put her down, even though she was fine at night. If I got really desperate, I would hold her through naps, but most of the time we ended up with a day filled with 20 minutes naps, an overtired baby and super cranky parents. I have no idea what happened but just grew out of it. So no real advice, just sympathy. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/at-what-point-do-you-admit-defeat-in-nap-training-and-where-do-we-go-from-here#post-1970355 Thu, 04 Dec 2014 10:31:01 +0000 Mae 1970355@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Foodnerd81: It's so hard to know what she is ready for in terms of sleep! she just moved to 3 naps about 3 weeks ago. When I'm rocking her she goes down extremely easily (like 0 fussing and asleep in under 10 min) for her first two naps and sometimes is slightly fussy about her 3rd but still almost always sleeps for it. And if she is up more than 2-2.5 hrs at a time she gets really cranky, especially in the evenings. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/at-what-point-do-you-admit-defeat-in-nap-training-and-where-do-we-go-from-here#post-1970347 Thu, 04 Dec 2014 10:27:37 +0000 Foodnerd81 1970347@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mae: first- I think you have to do what works for you, regardless of the comments you get from other people. But I know how it can make you second guess yourself and that's no fun. </p> <p>Do you think it's possible she could be ready to go down to two naps? We started the 2-3-4 schedule with C when she was about six months and she started going down for naps easier and sleeping a little longer. It sounds like you are doing everything "right" with the white noise and dark room (we have the cheapo "temporary" black paper blinds taped to C's window). I would probably give it a few more days since you have put so much time in already. Good luck! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/at-what-point-do-you-admit-defeat-in-nap-training-and-where-do-we-go-from-here#post-1970323 Thu, 04 Dec 2014 10:19:04 +0000 Mae 1970323@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Ms. Lilbunny: thanks. :) It's not that I feel like a "bad" mom per se. It's that I feel like a lot of people have easier babies and think that I'm holding her for my own benefit rather than hers or something..? Or they think my "having" to hold her is a much bigger deal than I do. Like yes, I would love if she'd nap on her own and I had 4 free hours/day to do things. But she's only a baby for such a tiny amount of time and if my house is a mess and I have no life for 1 year so that my kid can sleep...? I am just far less concerned about this than my mom or husband or friends. I don't think I'm going to look back at my life and say "wow I really wish I'd spent less time rocking my baby her first year of life." </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/at-what-point-do-you-admit-defeat-in-nap-training-and-where-do-we-go-from-here#post-1970316 Thu, 04 Dec 2014 10:15:31 +0000 Ms. Lilbunny 1970316@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mae: Hang in there. You've worked really hard so far to give up. I've read that nap training takes about 2 weeks. I have been nap training myself for the past 6 days. Some days have been better than others, but I've seen some improvement (even if small, it gives me hope).<br /> And don't worry about others, everyone has there opinion on what mom's should and should not do. Several people in my life also have a lot to say about me holding my baby for naps. "Just put him down, you don't give him a chance" was a very common one. I would explain that I had tried it amongst other things, but nothing works. The comments would make me feel like a bad mother. That's why I decided to join the Hellobee community of moms who understand what I'm going through. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/at-what-point-do-you-admit-defeat-in-nap-training-and-where-do-we-go-from-here#post-1970313 Thu, 04 Dec 2014 10:14:46 +0000 Smurfette 1970313@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mae: I would do it for weeks till she gets it. It took a while, both home and day care, for my LO to get that she had to nap on her own. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/at-what-point-do-you-admit-defeat-in-nap-training-and-where-do-we-go-from-here#post-1970306 Thu, 04 Dec 2014 10:10:36 +0000 Mae 1970306@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Smurfette: how many days would you give it before you felt like you'd given it a fair shot? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/at-what-point-do-you-admit-defeat-in-nap-training-and-where-do-we-go-from-here#post-1970305 Thu, 04 Dec 2014 10:09:20 +0000 Smurfette 1970305@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Honestly, I would stick with it. Let her cry, she knows how to put herself to sleep, so she needs to learn she needs to do it for naps too. You can't always be there to rock her and you need a break! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/at-what-point-do-you-admit-defeat-in-nap-training-and-where-do-we-go-from-here#post-1970294 Thu, 04 Dec 2014 10:05:30 +0000 Mae 1970294@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Jess1483: She isn't swaddled (she is 6 mo an rolling both ways, she's been unswaddled for 6 weeks which is when she decided no more napping off of mom). Our nap routine is as follows: into her room and she gets a diaper change and then into her sleep sack. Lights off (we have a blanket nailed over the window-- classy but it keeps it dark), white noise on, then I sit down in her glider and give her a paci and rock her while I sing her a song (this is the last part of her nighttime routine too) and then rock her another minute while I rub her forehead. Then she goes into the crib with her paci and a second paci plushie on her chest that she can hold onto and I rub her head and tell her its time to go to sleep now. </p> <p>I don't think that she'd take well to extinction. When she does fall asleep 95% of the time it is within 1 minute of a check. She'll be crying and upset and when I do the check I rub her head and give her her paci back and tell her its time to sleep and then (if she's going to sleep) she immediately rolls on her side and falls asleep. </p>