https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Mon, 13 Apr 2026 01:35:35 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/august-2016-postpartum-thread/page/22#post-2655876 Tue, 22 Nov 2016 12:18:40 +0000 OldpuebloJenn 2655876@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>The freshly picked sale is live! Most styles are $15 off. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/august-2016-postpartum-thread/page/22#post-2655250 Mon, 21 Nov 2016 11:59:23 +0000 pwnstar 2655250@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@LCTBQE: It's not pathetic. Or insecure. Your new reality is that your heart is now beating outside your body. To say that that's a game changer is the understatement of the century. :heart: </p> <p>After I had my first, I had so much anxiety at the thought of leaving my LO that I thought I wanted to stay home, which shocked the hell out of me because even during my pregnancy I was 100% sure that I would return to work full-time. What I did know was that going back to work was the right decision for me before my heart was beating outside my body, so, with that knowledge, I went back. It was hard. And I wasn’t always so sure that it was right . . . the guilt and the anxiety were so overwhelming at times (because I wasn't *sure* in the beginning) . . . and let's not even talk about how some people try to make you feel like the most selfish person on the planet because you do go back to work instead of *martyring* yourself for the sake of your child/family (not everyone holds that sentiment, but it was expressed to me on several different occasions and it stung like a son-of-a-gun). In so doing, it wasn't too long before I realized that I wanted to work because it was part of who I am, I wanted to work so that I could be the kind of partner to my DH that I wanted to be, and I wanted to work so that I could be the kind of role model for my LO that I wanted to be. So. I didn't always know that going back was the right decision - and you don't have to *know* either. I went back to make sure that I really didn't want to go back (if that makes sense). Having a child is such a huge paradigm shift . . . a little uncertainty in the wake of same is a good thing (at least it is imo). Because the right decision is what's right for you. Full stop. </p> <p>And yes, you will absolutely find your groove and things will hum along (as much as they can with a baby/young kiddo). You may not realize it though until you are well into the process . . . it may just hit you one random Tuesday when you're making dinner while entertaining your LO and handling a conference call/email . . . you will think “I’ve got this." Because you do. :heart: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/august-2016-postpartum-thread/page/22#post-2655056 Sun, 20 Nov 2016 22:34:23 +0000 agold 2655056@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@pwnstar: you always have such great advice!! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/august-2016-postpartum-thread/page/22#post-2655049 Sun, 20 Nov 2016 21:38:37 +0000 LCTBQE 2655049@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@pwnstar: oh my god when is your salf-halp book coming out--this is exactly it. I'm unfortunately prone to dismissing legitimate hormone imbalance as pathetic insecurity that I should man up and get over, so probably will have to print out the above and tack it to my computer. I actually don't know that I'm making the right decision--what I really know is that I can't quit my career--but your confidence that everyone else does is genuinely reassuring. The humming along part (really?!) sounds so good that my eyes well up with tears to even consider it. Part I am definitely not fucking up is the wine part, $13-18 Italian reds are our jam around here :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/august-2016-postpartum-thread/page/22#post-2654801 Sat, 19 Nov 2016 15:24:36 +0000 pwnstar 2654801@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@LCTBQE: I'm so glad it helped! :heart: It was so hard with my first, and beyond that, I had such unrealistic expectations for myself. It was a really tough transition for me, and I hate to think that other mamas are struggling. I know we all do. Especially with daycare. Even though we know we're making the right decision, it's so hard to remember that in the fog of *OMG AM I REALLY GOING TO LEAVE MY BABY*. The one thing I did right the first time was to promise myself that I would not make any major life decisions during the first year. Because hormones magnify and intensify ALLTHEFEELINGS and sometimes it's neigh on impossible to find your true north in the perfect storm of anxiety, guilt, and self-doubt. It really does work itself out, and before you know it, you're humming along juggling your career, marriage, and baby, and it ain't no thang (for the most part!). So many hugs to you! (And. If we were neighbors (or co-workers), I would make sure your wine/cocktail runneth over. Because. If we hafta adult, then lets ADULT, yo!) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/august-2016-postpartum-thread/page/22#post-2654634 Fri, 18 Nov 2016 21:52:59 +0000 LCTBQE 2654634@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Sorry for the delayed reply, everyone-- the last of the parade of family visits is now over (just in time for us to haul ass across the state for Thanksgiving, wheeee). Guess I'm worried about logistics but underneath it needed some hand-holding from people who have been there :heart: </p> <p>@pwnstar: your response, and everything you've said in the past few days, has made me feel miles better about this--thank you. I think I'd feel less nervous if I knew someone whose child had done well at our daycare, but I keep reminding myself how happy/normal all the parents looked during drop off when we toured the place, and the women who work there do seem really warm and organized. I think I've also been hyperventilating a bit about getting our schedule in place--it didn't even occur to me until I read your post about going back to chill the fuck out and let the groove happen instead of trying to organize everything to death. SO glad to hear that your baby boy hit the ground running at yall's place and is doing great :) That's awesome that he and your daughter both napped well on their first days there! Will he take the paci for you now, or just at daycare?<br /> Ah, and about the Becky, YEAH. I just got a legit pair of mom jeans to try to contend with the situation--Levi's Wedgies. They are 100% cotton with no stretch and they come up practically over the ribcage, thank god.</p> <p>@pwnstar: @ShootingStar: this pumping conversation is super educational and I'm glad to benefit from the eavesdropping.</p> <p>@T.H.O.U.: the fact that it's out of my control is something that I have GOT to get through my head. I'm glad your kiddos adjusted well. and even though the consensus is that it's a non-issue, this week we did have a surprise breakthrough--he's now going down drowsy but awake for almost every nap. couldn't hurt I guess.</p> <p>@ShootingStar: @MrsSCB: this helps so much just to know that yall do/did have all the same fears :heart: and so good about Lily's bottle/paci/nap success!! I'm doing a gradual transition too--my boss is a SAINT and spontaneously offered to let me work from home my first week, so I'll be able to pick him up a little early, and I guess it feels better that I'll be local just in case of freak out (probably more likely me than the baby). </p> <p>@futuremama: thank you for this :heart: </p> <p>@Pirouette: oh rats I forgot you guys have a nanny! </p> <p>@MrsSCB: sounds like it went really well with your husband! it's like junior trial run for day care :) and I don't blame you one bit for feeling out of it with the move, I guess it had to happen but sounds so disruptive and tumultuous. I get super depressed if the house isn't completely clean and uncluttered... huge stacks of boxes containing your entire life + tiny baby who needs you for everything = woof :meh: hope it's coming together a bit. on the bright side, didn't you have super shitty neighbors that you no longer have to deal with? yay? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/august-2016-postpartum-thread/page/22#post-2654375 Fri, 18 Nov 2016 12:23:35 +0000 pwnstar 2654375@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@MrsSCB: YASSSSSS. Take advantage of the time to do something--or many things!--for you. </p> <p>@ShootingStar: If you don't want to move the time, I would definitely decrease the time (and switching to a manual is a good idea) for that session until you can eliminate it. Because yeah, if it's too much now, it will be WAY too much in a month or so. And pumping is hard enough without anything extra! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/august-2016-postpartum-thread/page/22#post-2654322 Fri, 18 Nov 2016 11:23:49 +0000 ShootingStar 2654322@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@pwnstar: I don't know that I can do it much later, since I go to bed right after. But I have thought about maybe switching to my manual pump because it's much less efficient. And then tapering that off. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/august-2016-postpartum-thread/page/21#post-2654308 Fri, 18 Nov 2016 11:08:51 +0000 MrsSCB 2654308@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@pwnstar: I'm starting on a Wednesday -- mostly because F was born on a Wednesday, and I wanted my 16 full weeks. But now that it's getting closer, I'm so glad to start with a short week. I'm planning on sending him to daycare for a few hours per day before I go back to ease into it. I'd been thinking of going to work for those hours, but now I'm like, "Ummm, no. I'm going to spend them doing relaxing things by myself." :-P </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/august-2016-postpartum-thread/page/21#post-2654296 Fri, 18 Nov 2016 10:55:56 +0000 pwnstar 2654296@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@ShootingStar: Can you gradually reduce the time you spend pumping during the before bed session while also pumping later, say, 30 minutes or so, until you don't get engorged/need to pump (so that you can eliminate that session entirely)? If you continue to pump and don't signal your body that it is overproducing, it will continue to produce at the current level. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/august-2016-postpartum-thread/page/21#post-2654292 Fri, 18 Nov 2016 10:48:16 +0000 ShootingStar 2654292@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I have kind of a crazy pumping schedule and I feel like it's way too much. Lily started sleeping until 6 or 7 around 10 weeks, and I got in the habit of pumping in the morning before she got up, because being so engorged woke me up. Then I started pumping before bed so that I'd be prepared to go 9 hours overnight. </p> <p>Thing have shifted around, but I end up pumping 5 times a day. I feed her at 6/6:30, pump at 7:30 (and get a ton) and then pump 2-3 times at work. Either 9:30, 1 and 3:30, or 10ish and 2ish. Then I pump before bed.</p> <p>I'd like to eliminate the pump before bed, but I tried to go without it last night and woke up incredibly uncomfortable. I'm not sure how long it'll take for my body to get the memo. The 7:30 pump is also a PITA, but I get the most milk then and I'm so full, even after feeding her. She generally takes about 2 ounces from one side, and I can then pump another 2 ounces from that side and 5 from the opposite one. </p> <p>I don't need this much milk, I don't have the freezer space for this much milk. But last time once I started reducing sessions my supply took an absolute nose dive. I didn't pump this much then though, so that might be different. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/august-2016-postpartum-thread/page/21#post-2654291 Fri, 18 Nov 2016 10:47:20 +0000 pwnstar 2654291@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@agold: I know it's super hard, but for the first few days, just take everything in stride. Have a plan, but know that there will be little hiccups here and there. No biggie! I would also recommend not starting on a Monday. A full week the first week can really be a grind! A Wednesday start would be better timing - you have a few days to execute your plan to see how it goes and what works and what is not working so well, and then the weekend to recover and tweak things for the following week! You will also have a better idea about what you will need during the week, e.g., nursing supplies, daycare supplies, lunch, etc., and can plan for that over the weekend to help your week go more smoothly (I do as much as possible on the weekend and the night before--the less I have to do in the morning, the better! But that's just my preference.). After a couple of weeks, you will get into a pretty decent groove. There will always be minor hiccups along the way, but it won't be as overwhelming and stressful (like it probably is right now). </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/august-2016-postpartum-thread/page/21#post-2654287 Fri, 18 Nov 2016 10:36:42 +0000 agold 2654287@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@pwnstar: yes, that's what I was just thinking today. She had a funny night and I'm nursing her late this morning. Ugh. I'm getting a little anxious about going back to work. I'm going today to meet with my boss and ask for the ability to work from home on Tuesdays and some sporadic thursdays. I hope it works because I'm otherwise prepared to quit. But that would be crazy. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/august-2016-postpartum-thread/page/21#post-2654252 Fri, 18 Nov 2016 10:04:43 +0000 pwnstar 2654252@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@agold: It is really hard to imagine/visualize how it will all *work* sometimes! And keep in mind that you will probably have to set the schedule/pace, i.e., waking E up to get her to feed at a particular time so that you can begin your morning routine. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/august-2016-postpartum-thread/page/21#post-2654159 Fri, 18 Nov 2016 07:58:47 +0000 agold 2654159@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@pwnstar: thank you for sharing that schedule! I'm hoping my baby follows something similar. </p> <p>@T.H.O.U.: I've never pumped for that long. It when I'm back work maybe I will try that! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/august-2016-postpartum-thread/page/21#post-2654152 Fri, 18 Nov 2016 07:42:54 +0000 pwnstar 2654152@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@T.H.O.U.: I will have to try that. In all my time pumping, I have never gotten a second letdown. I feel like I have a better supply this go 'round, and I am willing to try pretty much anything! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/august-2016-postpartum-thread/page/21#post-2654125 Fri, 18 Nov 2016 05:40:26 +0000 T.H.O.U. 2654125@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>In the past I've gotten a second let down to get the ounces I need. Usually that let down didn't happen until the 20 minute mark of pumping. Another tip is to unhook take a sip of water and then try for that second let down. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/august-2016-postpartum-thread/page/21#post-2654072 Thu, 17 Nov 2016 23:22:57 +0000 pwnstar 2654072@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@agold: My schedule is shaping up to look something like:</p> <p>6 am nurse<br /> (daycare drop off between 7:30-8)<br /> 9 am daycare bottle<br /> 12 pm daycare bottle<br /> 3 pm daycare bottle<br /> (daycare pickup at 4:30)<br /> 5 pm - bedtime nurse on demand</p> <p>Based on your drop off/pickup time, you may only need 3 bottles. It also depends on your pumping output. You may only need to pump 3 times to get the ounces you need. </p> <p>Also, my little guy definitely nurses more often than that at home (he likes to snack!). And he definitely wasn't on any set schedule. So there will probably be a learning curve for a few days before you figure out how many bottles, ounces per bottle, and total ounces you need for each day. I started with 4 bottles the first day (2, 3, 3, 3). Based on feedback from my little guy's teachers, the next day I had 4 bottles, all with 3 ounces. (I didn't think he would need that fourth bottle, but I sent it just in case). Because I know that he deally doesn't need a fourth bottle (i pick him up before his next feeding). and based on additional feedback, tomorrow I am sending three bottles with 4 ounces in each, and I expect him to drink all but maybe half an ounce or so of the last bottle. </p> <p>It may take a couple of days to get it sorted out, but your little lady's teachers will help you too! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/august-2016-postpartum-thread/page/21#post-2654060 Thu, 17 Nov 2016 22:41:41 +0000 agold 2654060@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@pwnstar: I am looking at the times my girl nurses and it seems like she will need 4 bottles for when I'm gone. That's 4 times pumping. So crazy. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/august-2016-postpartum-thread/page/21#post-2654057 Thu, 17 Nov 2016 22:29:32 +0000 pwnstar 2654057@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@agold: I pumped for 15 minutes for each session. I tried to do 20-15-15 today, but my output was the same as my 15-15-15 day. So I will keep the sessions to 15 minutes. </p> <p>I expect to need to supplement because I seriously doubt that I can pump 3 times a day after the holidays (work is just too unpredictable and hectic, and lots of calls/meetings are scheduled last minute). If I have to drop a session, I expect a corresponding drop in output by a couple of ounces. I could get lucky and get the same yield, but I doubt it. And I don't want to set myself up for that disappointment. I will take what I can get, do the best that I can, and let the rest go.</p> <p>ETA: Also, there are times when you do everything right and you just can't pump enough. So having a little formula on hand to bridge any unanticipated gaps is a good idea, especially until I can build up another stash. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/august-2016-postpartum-thread/page/21#post-2654049 Thu, 17 Nov 2016 22:17:06 +0000 agold 2654049@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@pwnstar: good job going back to work! I'm dreading the transition from being with my baby every day to leaving her with others. It sounds like you are doing the best we can under these circumstances. And great job on pumping. How many minutes do you pump and how long does your total lump session take? I'm planning to do three pump sessions a day too. I'm praying it's enough for my babe. And why do you think you won't be able to keep the pumping up? I know it's tough, but we have the legal right to do it. Ugh. I'm nervous, too. My work isn't friendly to this kind of stuff. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/august-2016-postpartum-thread/page/21#post-2654006 Thu, 17 Nov 2016 20:49:45 +0000 Pirouette 2654006@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@T.H.O.U.: it's nice to have that safety net, though hopefully you won't need it. </p> <p>@pwnstar: nope! He's just a total piggy. He nurses from 6-9pm, then still eats overnight, usually 2x, sometimes more. And wakes up ravenous in the morning. He's over 12.5 pounds, has doubled his birth weight at 12 weeks, and is half my 3 year old's weight (she's 25lb!) your baby's intake is much more in line with the norn than mine, i would think he's overeating but if he was, wouldn't he drop the night feedings?! But yes, i have no issue with formula other than the dairy factor. I just don't want to go backwards with the reflux. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/august-2016-postpartum-thread/page/21#post-2653985 Thu, 17 Nov 2016 19:53:04 +0000 pwnstar 2653985@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@katsupgirl: @T.H.O.U.: @MrsSCB: @Pirouette: Thanks y'all. 💗</p> <p>@katsupgirl: It's really not realistic for me to maintain three pump sessions at work. It is hella disruptive. I currently have the benefit of so many people being out for vacation/holiday, and things generally being at a slightly slower pace, which will definitely change in January. I'm trying to take advantage of it while I can. </p> <p>@Pirouette: I fully expect to need to start supplementing in the coming weeks. I feel like I have been lucky with pumping so far, but I know I can't sustain this schedule (and probably not this output) long-term. I'm not opposed to formula (I supplemented with my first starting at around 5 months), but with my son being sensitive to dairy/soy, my formula options are Neocate or Elecate, both of which are pretty pricey. But when it comes down to it, I would choose formula to save my sanity in a heartbeat!</p> <p>20 ounces is daunting!!! Does your little guy STTN? Mine does not (he usually wakes 2-3 times, or until I bring him into bed with me). I am wondering if the reason my son takes less during the day is because he still eats overnight? He's certainly gaining just fine-he weighed 15 lbs on Monday. :shocked: My 4 year old only weighs 32 pounds, and didn't hit 15 lbs until she was around 10/12 months! </p> <p>@T.H.O.U.: @MrsSCB: I was super anxious about my little guy starting daycare because he had only taken a bottle a couple of times, he really only napped in my arms, he hates the swing, and he won't take a paci. Well. He drank 3 bottles both yesterday and today, and today, when I walked in, he was sitting in a swing happily sucking away on a paci. Say whaaaaa? It's amazing how babies can adapt. My fingers are crossed for you that the transition is smoother than you anticipate. 💗 </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/august-2016-postpartum-thread/page/21#post-2653972 Thu, 17 Nov 2016 19:36:53 +0000 T.H.O.U. 2653972@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Pirouette: about 20 min. Worst case is she skips her morning feed and DH brings her up for lunch. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/august-2016-postpartum-thread/page/21#post-2653951 Thu, 17 Nov 2016 19:01:03 +0000 Pirouette 2653951@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@pwnstar: congrats on getting through the first 2 days - tomorrow's Friday already :) 3x a day feels really disruptive and i was thinking of dropping to 2x, but I'm already running a deficit with 3 pumps, so i am not sure what to do. Little man took 20 today and it's the least he's taken all week so far :shocked: formula here we come - probably after Thanksgiving. I'm a little worried about the dairy factor since I've been really limiting it and his reflux has been so much better. But he has an insatiable appetite and i can't let my work slip by stressing over trying to pump more.</p> <p>@T.H.O.U.: ughhh I'm sorry, that's so stressful. Do you work far away? I hope she starts taking it once you are gone. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/august-2016-postpartum-thread/page/21#post-2653949 Thu, 17 Nov 2016 18:58:43 +0000 MrsSCB 2653949@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@ShootingStar: Thank you, I'm so glad Lily is doing well in daycare. That really makes me feel a lot better &lt;3</p> <p>@pwnstar: I'm glad it's going well so far. I go back three weeks from yesterday. I had a half day on Tuesday, though, and my husband watched the baby. It didn't go too terribly, he took the bottle fine and even fell asleep (for about 30 minutes, but still, that was his first time falling asleep not in the carseat or with me nursing). He did fuss a little more than he does with me, but I suppose that's to be expected in the beginning. Plus it was the first time my husband had him alone for more than an hour. They even went to Target, I was impressed! Now I'm just really anxious about whether I'll be able to pump enough milk for him. I hate pumping and don't really have a stash going. I plan to pump three times also. I'll be dropping him off at 9 and picking him up between 5 and 5:30. I'll admit, though, that it did feel a little good to be back at work. I don't think I'm meant to be a SAHM forever. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/august-2016-postpartum-thread/page/21#post-2653943 Thu, 17 Nov 2016 18:50:38 +0000 T.H.O.U. 2653943@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@pwnstar: great job! </p> <p>I go back in two weeks (well a week plus some days now). </p> <p>Little girl is staying home with dad for a month and she's not taking a bottle. Sooooo that's going to suck. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/august-2016-postpartum-thread/page/21#post-2653926 Thu, 17 Nov 2016 18:34:11 +0000 katsupgirl 2653926@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@pwnstar: I think I'm only going to be able to do two sessions when I go back to work. It must be a relief to be pumping more than he's taking at daycare. Pumping is so stressful! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/august-2016-postpartum-thread/page/21#post-2653899 Thu, 17 Nov 2016 18:10:02 +0000 pwnstar 2653899@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@katsupgirl: I am currently pumping at 8:30, 11:30, and 2:30. It's looking like my little guy will need 11-12 ounces at daycare and I have pumped a little more than 13 ounces both yesterday and today. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/august-2016-postpartum-thread/page/21#post-2653760 Thu, 17 Nov 2016 14:52:03 +0000 katsupgirl 2653760@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@pwnstar: congrats on making it through day one! It's so hard. Hope you get into a groove quickly. What are your pumping times? </p>