https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Sun, 19 Apr 2026 06:46:36 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/baby-blues-tell-me-it-gets-better#post-2874600 Sat, 02 Mar 2019 10:54:53 +0000 pachamama 2874600@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Katrocap: I'm super paranoid about his circumcision. I have been to our doc twice and now she referred me to a urologist, I'm convinced the OB took too much off (they do the surgery). I don't think she did but I am obsessed with thinking its messed up. And illness. It's been a terrible long winter, and my son is in daycare and I am so petrified he'll get sick :-( </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/baby-blues-tell-me-it-gets-better#post-2873345 Thu, 21 Feb 2019 13:45:26 +0000 Autumnmama79 2873345@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Katrocap: Thats something! So good that you're seeing friends and doing some exercising. Happy to hear yesterday was such a good day. Sometimes it truly is one day at a time - so cheesy but maybe true. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/baby-blues-tell-me-it-gets-better#post-2873343 Thu, 21 Feb 2019 13:42:04 +0000 Lindsay05 2873343@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Aww, I can totally relate. It does get better and just like you said, yesterday was a good day. Soon you will have more and more of those good days and less of the bad days. I feel like I have been doing better once baby got into a normal routine and I could get away more often. Today is a really bad day for me. I heard some news that completely triggered me and now I feel so sad. The kids are home with me today so I had to sneak into the bathroom and just have a full out ugly cry. I know this is temporary but it sucks completely having hard days. Hang in there. As for talking to your child I think it’s ok to be honest just like you were. I have never talked to my kids about it but I think that’s because my emotions usually come out as irritable. Unfortunately the have seen me irritable far more than I would like. But like I said, it does get fewer and fewer. I hope this helped in any way. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/baby-blues-tell-me-it-gets-better#post-2873331 Thu, 21 Feb 2019 12:49:29 +0000 Katrocap 2873331@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Also, any ideas about how to talk to my six year old about what I'm going through? He's so great and not upset when he sees me crying. I tell him that sometimes moms get sad after they have babies and it's hard to understand why, but I'm not sure if that's the right thing to say. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/baby-blues-tell-me-it-gets-better#post-2873317 Thu, 21 Feb 2019 12:19:28 +0000 Katrocap 2873317@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I didn't respond yesterday because yesterday was actually an amazing day. I have no idea what was different. I didn't have to take the Xanax and I felt calm and like myself again. My obsessive thoughts didn't even sneak into my head! However today is a tough one, and I don't know what's different. Ugh.</p> <p>@pachamama: I'm sorry your three-year old has been such a monster. What are you feeling paranoid about? Those feelings must be tough.</p> <p>@autumnmama79: Thanks for reaching out! I try to distract myself with cleaning, reading, exercising (when baby lets me) and getting together with a few other colleagues who are also on maternity leave. It does help, but I worry that all I'm really doing is ignoring the problem and wonder how long I'll have to keep up these distractions.</p> <p>@lioneyes: Thanks for the support! I'm glad the Lexapro has helped you. Taking action definitely has improved the situation for me a little. Last week my psychiatrist increased my antidepressant dosage. One of the things I'm struggling with is this being my second child. I feel that when I read about PPD/PPA a lot of it has to do with the transition to motherhood, whereas I have six years of motherhood under my belt. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/baby-blues-tell-me-it-gets-better#post-2872858 Tue, 19 Feb 2019 12:48:29 +0000 lioneyes 2872858@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm sorry you are struggling!!! I had my second in mid-Oct and even with DH home on leave, the first 3 months were REALLY hard. After DH being back at work 2 weeks, I realized my anxiety was not helping the situation (definitely my normal high levels of anxiety, in a new life situation. exacerbated by PPA) and went to my OB and got on a low dose of Lexapro. Life changing- it's still not easy but I feel so much less like i'm the verge of a panic attack at all times. Yes, DD eating more during the day so she can sleep more at night (that got better around 9-10 weeks) helped! But just going to my doc (I called, said I needed a mental health visit- which is someting I learned from these boards! and they got me in the next day) to talk and hear how normal this much difficulty is, and then actually doing something concrete to help myself, made the most difference. Thinking of you. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/baby-blues-tell-me-it-gets-better#post-2872857 Tue, 19 Feb 2019 12:43:03 +0000 Autumnmama79 2872857@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Katrocap: I'm sorry to hear you are struggling. So incredible that you've been able to identify your feelings and are open to getting support. With my first I wasn't even able to recognize what was going on and only diagnosed when talking to a therapist years later. </p> <p>Have any little things been working in terms of at-home coping mechanisms? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/baby-blues-tell-me-it-gets-better#post-2872856 Tue, 19 Feb 2019 12:39:10 +0000 pachamama 2872856@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Katrocap: 🙋 me too. Is anything working for you? My husband went back to work and it's been really hard. My three-year-old has become quite a little monster too. I've had some paranoia </p> <p> I would say it's more unenjoyable than depressing but still... </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/baby-blues-tell-me-it-gets-better#post-2872836 Tue, 19 Feb 2019 11:29:31 +0000 Katrocap 2872836@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Still struggling with PPD/PPA. Just hoping to hear some kind words of support. Thanks! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/baby-blues-tell-me-it-gets-better#post-2871325 Mon, 11 Feb 2019 08:46:16 +0000 pachamama 2871325@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Katrocap: let's see, at my 6 week appt I definitely was seeing the light at the end of the tunnel. 2 or 3 months later the real dark days were over (also coincided with spring here in NY).<br /> Unfortunately I did battle some mild depression for about a year BUT motherhood at that time did NOT suit me, my son was extremely reserved, grumpy and non-interactive (didn't smile for 4 months). We did not bond until he was like 20 months. Very sad for me, I also was not on any meds or going to therapy. I just didn't like being a mom.<br /> This time has been much better. I enjoy the distraction of my toddler! It's broken up the tedium. I don't know if that helps. I just hope you know this is not permanent and not your *future self" so to speak. You will heal!!💙💙 </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/baby-blues-tell-me-it-gets-better#post-2871257 Sun, 10 Feb 2019 15:43:38 +0000 Katrocap 2871257@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@pachamama: Thanks for your support. Yeah, I am still having a hard time. How long was it until you started feeling better? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/baby-blues-tell-me-it-gets-better#post-2871078 Sat, 09 Feb 2019 05:52:33 +0000 pachamama 2871078@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Katrocap: awww sounds like you are still having a hard time ... Totally normal 😩. I felt the same, like a few good days then a rough period. And the pressure of "being in the moment" and people telling you to appreciate everything is pressure you do not need. One thing I am working on is taking one day at a time. That's hard when you're anxious and a little depressed but it takes some stress off worrying about tomorrow and the future. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/baby-blues-tell-me-it-gets-better#post-2870945 Fri, 08 Feb 2019 10:37:21 +0000 Katrocap 2870945@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@LCTBQE: thanks for checking in, somehow I missed your post. </p> <p>Things are a little bit better. I hoped I would be completely back to normal by now, but I guess it will take awhile. It feels like I go two steps forward and one step backwards. I haven't seen a therapist yet but made a couple calls this morning to make appointments. One thing that gets me upset and starts me crying is just thinking of my kids growing up. It's so stupid and I wish I could just enjoy being in the moment. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/baby-blues-tell-me-it-gets-better#post-2868290 Tue, 22 Jan 2019 20:42:21 +0000 LCTBQE 2868290@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Katrocap: just checking in, how are you doing? :heart: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/baby-blues-tell-me-it-gets-better#post-2865329 Sun, 06 Jan 2019 23:08:52 +0000 Lindsay05 2865329@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Katrocap: I hope you feel better soon. Good for you for seeking help. It can be so difficult but it helps to talk about it. ❤️ </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/baby-blues-tell-me-it-gets-better#post-2865118 Sat, 05 Jan 2019 16:02:37 +0000 Katrocap 2865118@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Hey everyone,<br /> I saw my psychiatrist yesterday and she increased the dosage of my antidepressant. She also prescribed Xanax to take as needed. It's a low dosage, just .25 mg, and I'm a bit nervous about becoming over dependent on it. I took one today and the previous two days, and I think it has helped, a little. I sure hope I start feeling more like myself soon. Rationally I know it will get better, but I'm not there emotionally yet. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/baby-blues-tell-me-it-gets-better#post-2864962 Fri, 04 Jan 2019 14:54:32 +0000 pachamama 2864962@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Katrocap: yes like Muffinsmusffins said exactly. For the first and I mean very first time in my life I had zero appetite. I remember specifically my MIL coming over and she gently commented I looked ill and just shoved a turkey roll down my throat b/c I knew I had not been taking care of myself. I just legit wasn't hungry which I blamed on EBF (makes no sense) when now I know it was extreme anxiety and depression. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/baby-blues-tell-me-it-gets-better#post-2864481 Wed, 02 Jan 2019 15:16:41 +0000 muffinsmuffins 2864481@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Katrocap: this was not PPD/PPA specific but I had severe anxiety when my son was hospitalized and I totally lost my appetite as well. I had to force myself to eat and drink. In times of high stress, our body goes into that primitive fight or flight mode and eating becomes a lower priority. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/baby-blues-tell-me-it-gets-better#post-2864479 Wed, 02 Jan 2019 15:05:11 +0000 babypugs 2864479@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Katrocap: Oh, yes, this sounds so familiar to my experiences. On the first day home from the hospital both times I just stood in the shower and sobbed and sobbed. I was usually okay during the day after the first couple of days but just felt this sense of impending doom every evening as the sun went down. Like others have mentioned, I think I was unconsciously dreading those long, solo overnight hours. My first was a spectacularly bad sleeper so these feelings went on far longer than they should have. I think it's a good idea to check in with your doctor and ask for extra help if they persist past 3 weeks or so.</p> <p>I also experienced a complete loss of appetite with my first. I forced myself to gag down bites of high calorie foods, but I still lost way too much weight and wish I'd been more proactive finding help. </p> <p>All this is to say, you're definitely not alone. It's hard and the hormones are real. Hang in there and try to find the help you need if it persists. ♡♡ </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/baby-blues-tell-me-it-gets-better#post-2864466 Wed, 02 Jan 2019 14:30:50 +0000 Katrocap 2864466@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Did anyone else have a loss of/reduced appetite when going through this?</p> <p>@turquoisemama: I don't like the term "baby blues" either. It diminishes the situation and sounds cutesy. It definitely doesn't feel cutesy. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/baby-blues-tell-me-it-gets-better#post-2864371 Wed, 02 Jan 2019 02:28:10 +0000 turquoisemama 2864371@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Katrocap: Sounds like my experience. With DD1 it was really bad and I definitely had lots of anxiety, rage and regretful thoughts. It went on for months but I didn’t know what it was so I never got treated. With DD2 it was more like the typical baby blues. But it’s really crappy to call it that because in my opinion it’s much darker than what it sounds like, it lasted a couple of weeks but definitely improved. Hang in there, and reach out for support and help. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/baby-blues-tell-me-it-gets-better#post-2864358 Tue, 01 Jan 2019 22:48:39 +0000 Katrocap 2864358@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Also, glad to hear that it does get better.</p> <p>@jennibenni: We all went for a walk today and ended up being out right before sunset and I was freaking out to be outdoors at that time while the sun was fading away.</p> <p>@lctbqe: Although baby's sleep isn;t terrible, I haven't gotten more than a 4 hour stretch since she was born.</p> <p>@pinkb: DS and I went for a short walk this morning and the fresh air helped. It's been cloudy here the past few days, so I'm looking forward to the next sunny day.</p> <p>@chicalgobee: Interesting that your experiences were so different based on when your kids were born.</p> <p>@annem1990: Thank you for saying I will get through this. Just hearing that helps. I will set up a therapy appt. Maybe I'll feel better when the appt comes around, but at least I'll have the option.</p> <p>@pachamama: I totally relate to the literal sinking feeling. Also, the first night home I thought the exact same thing: "this was a mistake."</p> <p>@grace: Stupid hormones, indeed! That should be my new mantra.</p> <p>@bhbee: It helps to know I'm not alone. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/baby-blues-tell-me-it-gets-better#post-2864349 Tue, 01 Jan 2019 21:20:11 +0000 Jennibenni 2864349@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>With my first baby I was in tears every evening as it started to get dark. I just had the worst sinking feeling, I felt sick to my stomach, and so tense and nervous. For some reason the sun slowly fading away just was heart wrenching and I think it was such a mix of wild hormones and dreading the uncertainty of the witching hours and a terrible night of sleep. </p> <p>But yes it did get better! I think by two months or so I wasn’t a mess every evening. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/baby-blues-tell-me-it-gets-better#post-2864348 Tue, 01 Jan 2019 21:12:45 +0000 Katrocap 2864348@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Thanks everyone. I feel really scared that this is my new reality. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/baby-blues-tell-me-it-gets-better#post-2864298 Tue, 01 Jan 2019 14:04:03 +0000 LCTBQE 2864298@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>For both babies, I had it for about two weeks as well, although it was more like weeks 2-4pp for me. I had some really frightening suicidal thoughts on top of depression, but it just disappeared completely and that was that. for me it was helped enormously by getting adequate sleep--like 5-6 hour stretch at night plus another couple hours before or after. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/baby-blues-tell-me-it-gets-better#post-2864266 Tue, 01 Jan 2019 10:08:29 +0000 youboots 2864266@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>It’s normal to a point. If it continues past a couple weeks then I’d bring it up to my Dr.</p> <p>I remember my Mom coming over and holding DD and I would just sob and sob and lie in bed with DH. It was very bizarre and I felt out of control. It resolved quickly and I was under the care of a psychiatrist. It was very scary. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/baby-blues-tell-me-it-gets-better#post-2864264 Tue, 01 Jan 2019 09:58:21 +0000 pinkb 2864264@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Agree its totally normal! I had it for about 2 weeks with each baby. One thing that really helped me was getting out during the day and just walking a little bit in the fresh air and sunshine. ( I know not an option for everyone) I know everyone is different so I hope you might find some little trick to help a bit. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/baby-blues-tell-me-it-gets-better#post-2864247 Tue, 01 Jan 2019 01:21:01 +0000 ChiCalGoBee 2864247@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Katrocap: I cried 3-4 times at 5 days PP with my second, initially triggered by my son hugging his baby sister too hard and her crying, which made him cry feeling like he’d done it wrong. I felt so awful that my sweet boy was trying so hard and felt he’d failed. It gutted me and I sobbed. Very fortunately that was our low point, and I promise it gets better. However, you 100% need to call your doc to make sure your mental health is taken care of. S.A.D. or not, this cannot wait and you should get the support you need. All that being said, the differences in my mood with my son (born in November after DST ended) and daughter (born in July) was night and day. I figured it would be, but the extra evening light was huge for my mental well-being. </p> <p>@wrkbrk: This. I had the same issues with my son. As soon as the sun went down I’d have massive anxiety. It’s such a hard time of year to have a newborn. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/baby-blues-tell-me-it-gets-better#post-2864236 Mon, 31 Dec 2018 22:22:32 +0000 wrkbrk 2864236@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I was the same. Late Nov baby and started to get sad and depressed every evening at 5. In my case I think it had a lot to do with having solo overnight duty (nursing) while my spouse slept and it was stressful and lonely and exhausting.<br /> I hope it gets better mama. But don’t hesitate to call your doc. If drugs help for the time being - take them!! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/baby-blues-tell-me-it-gets-better#post-2864223 Mon, 31 Dec 2018 20:29:02 +0000 annem1990 2864223@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>HUGS. Depression and anxiety are so hard. I've had other major physical health issues and NOTHING compares to mental illness. You are not alone.</p> <p>I felt the Baby Blues for 2 weeks (just like the books said) after DS was born. I barely ate and just generally unhappy. Once that 2 weeks was up, I felt like myself again. Hopefully the same will happen to you! But if it doesn't, there are SO many options out there. Even if it does end up being PPD or PPA, YOU WILL GET THROUGH THIS. Maybe set up an appointment with your OB for sooner than they suggest? Then you can at least get the ball rolling if you need more care. Also, get an appointment with a therapist asap. Even if these feelings pass quickly, you'll feel better having established care and a plan. </p>