https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Wed, 20 May 2026 21:30:38 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/backtracking-from-failed-attempt#post-2797560 Tue, 16 Jan 2018 21:20:52 +0000 rnmcdonnell 2797560@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@pinkarmadillo: @kt326: yes, I forgot to mention! We tried naked at first but same as kt326's son, he is SO resistant to being naked (specifically bottoms). I thought I could distract him enough to get past it but he refused to leave his room without pants, and I was only able to get him to do so by letting him wear the underwear.</p> <p>Thanks for the advice everyone! Today his teachers at daycare would ask him to sit on the potty at diaper changes, and said he was always super happy to do it even though he never peed. But when we got home he was so excited when I asked if he say on the potty at school and then as soon as I asked if he wanted to sit on the potty here he just moaned "noooooo" :grin: But I think this is all really helpful! Seems like I won't break him by just casually slipping back into something like the old routines, but continue to read potty books/talk about it and offer him choices both at home and at school with no pressure? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/backtracking-from-failed-attempt#post-2797399 Tue, 16 Jan 2018 11:03:15 +0000 newlypregnantlady 2797399@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I also second the Oh Crap Potty Training Book. She specifically addresses this issue. I believe her solution is to go naked for a few days, and basically start over (with her method, of course). She basically does “blocks” where the kid is naked, then commando, then has underwear. She also has some portions about kids resistant to training and being “firm but not mean”. </p> <p>Today is literally day 1 for us so I’m kind of freaking out. We’re just hanging out and I’m trying to be casual about it. She speaks a lot about resistant kids and I know for my daughter I’ve taken one of the author’s suggestions, which is just to casually but firmly tell her “pee goes in the potty when you’re ready”. But again, today is Day 1 for us so I have no experience. But I definitely filed away a lot of her suggestions because my daughter seems to match a lot of what she discusses.</p> <p>Good luck! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/backtracking-from-failed-attempt#post-2797370 Tue, 16 Jan 2018 10:11:33 +0000 KT326 2797370@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I would just go back to diapers. No reason to say anything. He’s not ready yet and you don’t want any negative associations with the potty. We had a few false starts with my older son and we just went right back to diapers when he started resisting. He wasn’t ready until a few months after he turned three. </p> <p>@pinkarmadillo: this never worked with my son, he absolutely refused to be naked! Won’t even walk around without a shirt on! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/backtracking-from-failed-attempt#post-2797364 Tue, 16 Jan 2018 09:53:59 +0000 pinkarmadillo 2797364@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm a big believer in not doing underwear at first. Let him go naked for the first day and spend time only with him, watching his signs and guiding him to the potty. After that is down, move onto loose pants but not undies. Commando. Allow his muscle memory to fade and then go to undies. All of this is from the "Oh Crap!" potty training book. I highly recommend it! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/backtracking-from-failed-attempt#post-2797359 Tue, 16 Jan 2018 09:37:46 +0000 muffinsmuffins 2797359@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We stopped and started a few times since just before age 3 with DS...mainly out of travel and laziness. When we stopped, we just went back to diapers for a bit and stopped mentioning it unless he asked. When we decided to try again we would ask him ‘undies or diapers? Want to try on the potty for a treat?’ Etc and he would choose and we would just go with it. Since January 1st we’ve decided we aren’t going back so we now use pull ups exclusively when he’s at daycare and nothing at home. A bit more time and we will send him without pull ups. We schedule potty times and he’s doing well keeping dry (too well as he’s holding it too long most days, but that’s another story) my son also has a speech disorder but he understands all of what we tell him and can communicate his needs to us. That’s been a huge game changer in terms of pushing him or backing off. We haven’t wanted to force it.</p> <p>eta: I think you don’t have to pretend it hasnt happened. We just said oh remember we go on the potty, you can go if you want? Remember soon there will be no more diapers! But we didn’t ask him to go, more like offered or freely talked about it while we went, etc. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/backtracking-from-failed-attempt#post-2797293 Mon, 15 Jan 2018 23:27:12 +0000 rnmcdonnell 2797293@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My almost 2.5 year old was showing a basic level of potty readiness - talked about who was using the potty, can follow directions, would have somewhat regular dry periods during naps, was able to tell us when he was peeing and pooping, etc. Overall he's a bit more delayed compared to his older sister, he has a minor speech delay and generally seems younger and less independent than she did at the same age, but otherwise had what I would consider a base level of interest and cognizance over the last few months. Also we're going on a cruise in 2 months where he could only go in the pool if potty-trained; we wouldn't have trained him just for that, but with the readiness signs + a 3 day weekend, we thought the timing might work out well.</p> <p>So wrong! The first day wasn't that bad because of the novelty. Underwear, treats, etc. were motivating for interest, though we had a lot of accidents but he seemed okay. A couple moments of resistance to sitting on the potty but easily resolved. Yesterday he woke up and was much more resistant to participating, tons of accidents, lots of sitting on the potty and wiggling uncomfortably where I could tell he had to go but just couldn't release it. Today was better because he was figuring out to hold it more (less accidents), but worse because he just barely would agree to sit on the potty unless I was bribing him just to sit. I asked him if he was scared and he said yes.</p> <p>So the question now is, what do I do as far as pausing training? I have read about how you shouldn't go back to diapers, but I haven't found anyone explain what to actually do! Do I put him in pull-ups during the day instead? Do I ask or encourage him to use the potty, or not talk about the potty at all? Do we just pretend it didn't happen? Do we ask him what he wants to do? I'm just sort of lost as to how to not go back, but not move forward. Would love any advice! </p>