https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Tue, 14 Apr 2026 21:05:56 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/bed-sharing#post-2840883 Tue, 21 Aug 2018 14:16:59 +0000 Sams Mom 2840883@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm going to give a little perspective on bedsharing statistics. A lot of the infant deaths are attributed to SIDS or from bedsharing, but almost every SIDS case my husband has responded to mom and/or dad were strung out on something (or sometimes something they were genuinely prescribed or OTC) and smothered the baby. Very rarely (at least in my scope of experience) does a baby die from bedsharing if mom or dad is 100% clear of any substances. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/bed-sharing#post-2840880 Tue, 21 Aug 2018 14:02:50 +0000 pachamama 2840880@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I feel like cosleeping can't be as dangerous as they say because literally half the moms I know do it. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/bed-sharing#post-2840872 Tue, 21 Aug 2018 13:39:58 +0000 snowjewelz 2840872@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We are a bed sharing family! Bed shared with both our girls from birth. DD1 is almost 4, and DD2 is almost 2. When they were young we were very careful and at their ages now I don't really see any risks. We don't feel guilty at all and we love it. It works for our family. They are not going to be in our bed forever and we treasure this time in our lives! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/bed-sharing#post-2840854 Tue, 21 Aug 2018 12:59:24 +0000 periwinklebee 2840854@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@CatchAFallingStar: ah, that makes more sense! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/bed-sharing#post-2840851 Tue, 21 Aug 2018 12:55:53 +0000 CatchAFallingStar 2840851@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@periwinklebee: oops... I meant pack &amp; play... it’s huge like a crib, not bassinet </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/bed-sharing#post-2840796 Tue, 21 Aug 2018 09:50:03 +0000 josina 2840796@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I was just thinking about this this morning because we're well on our way to having two in our bed. :/<br /> With DS he always started in his crib/bed but I would bring him to bed by 5 so I could get some sleep. (he was a horrible sleeper the first 14 months till we weaned). Now at 3-1/2, he still starts in his toddler bed but crawls in with us around midnight every night. Its just easier to let that continue vs. one of us getting up to put him back to bed, and most of the time we don't notice him coming in.<br /> Now with DD, she's 18 months and a MUCH better sleeper, some nights she's in her crib till 6, some nights 5, the rare night 2 or 3. I 'should' lay her back down in her crib when she wakes up but it's SO much easier to bring her to bed, she goes right back to sleep.<br /> So for now, I'm just hoping DS outgrows this and DD continues to sleep through the night. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/bed-sharing#post-2840793 Tue, 21 Aug 2018 09:32:36 +0000 Sams Mom 2840793@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My son is coming up on 2 1/2 years old, and he has been in bed with us every night since the 2nd night he was home from the hospital. It started because his bassinet was lower than our bed and I had a c section so it hurt to bend over to get him in and out. Then it was because he was all about the boob, and I needed some sleep. My husband moves a lot in his sleep so I would sleep with my back to him and my son in front of me because anytime I move/switch positions at night I wake up. </p> <p>Now I wish he would sleep in his own bed, and it not be so much of a fight. I tell myself I will sleep train the next baby, but we will see. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/bed-sharing#post-2840783 Tue, 21 Aug 2018 08:48:09 +0000 Becky 2840783@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I did it as needed withDD1. I would have with DD2 because she was a bad sleeper, but she was way too curious to be in with us. I think you need to do what keeps you sane and everyone sleeping, while minimizing the risks as much as you can (like not having lots of blankets when they’re little). </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/bed-sharing#post-2840779 Tue, 21 Aug 2018 08:31:32 +0000 periwinklebee 2840779@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>There are some cultures like Japan where bed sharing is very high and rates of SIDS and infant death are very low, relative to anywhere else in the world. They do it safely, sleeping on a hard surface (often mats on the floor), no blankets or anything that could be a suffocation risk, traditionally the men sleep in another room. So just to say, if co-sleeping is done with careful attention to safety, it does not have to be dangerous. Rock n play - and many places where babies are likely to actually sleep - is also rated not safe for sleep. As an aside, I would not put a 6 month old in a bassinet, as once they can sit up and roll this can be dangerous. </p> <p>I co-sleep part-time with our son. He had horrible reflux and was a terrible sleeper initially who simply would not sleep anywhere else. He never slept more than 20 minutes in a bassinet. I tried several bassinets, without luck. I was on the verge of hallucinating, and falling asleep with him in a chair, which is much more dangerous than cosleeping. We did not use blankets/pillows, have a very firm mattress, I was careful about what I wore so it also would not pose any suffocation risk, and for the first six months my husband slept in another room (and still does sometimes). He would have regardless, as he's a very light sleeper and needs his sleep for work - there was no point in the baby waking him up, since all my kid wants in the middle of the night is the boob. We still cosleep after the nighttime feed. LO is a tortuously slow eater in the middle of the night, and I just can't make myself stay awake while he spends an hour feeding/dozing/feeding/dozing on the boob... </p> <p>My view is you have to assess what works for your family and then minimize risks. If your kid won't sleep elsewhere and you are a walking zombie, that is often going to be less safe than co-sleeping done safely. I also enjoy co-sleeping, I get the sweetest cuddles :grin: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/bed-sharing#post-2840777 Tue, 21 Aug 2018 08:22:45 +0000 bhbee 2840777@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I prefer not to but I do it for sanity when they won’t sleep. My girls were less into it so only did it sometimes, but my boy wanted to sleep with me all the time. He spent part of every night with us until we sleep trained at 13m (and still sneaks in our bed at 3).. He’s so physical about everything, I think he needed that kind of comfort (he still prefers to fall asleep holding your hand). </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/bed-sharing#post-2840771 Tue, 21 Aug 2018 07:42:47 +0000 skinnycow 2840771@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My daughter slept in our bed pretty consistently from 4 months - 1 year. I also said I'd never let my kid sleep in the bed but she wanted a boob in her mouth ALL NIGHT. The only way we both got decent sleep was with her in bed... I also loved the baby snuggles and it made me feel less guilty about being away from her during the day.</p> <p>Thankfully she outgrew it on her own around 12-13 months. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/bed-sharing#post-2840759 Tue, 21 Aug 2018 06:51:14 +0000 lady baltimore 2840759@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Our daughter slept in our bed exclusively for the first six months, and I would bring her into our bed after night wakings until she weaned at 22 months. DH still sleeps with her in the guest bed if she has a rough night (she is 2 years, 8 months).</p> <p>I always intended to bed share, and didn't feel guilty or nervous about it at all. It meant that baby and I both got as much rest as possible, which felt safest to me. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/bed-sharing#post-2840756 Tue, 21 Aug 2018 04:49:00 +0000 Kemma 2840756@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We’re part time bedsharing with Baby #3 who is now four months old and have bedshared with both older kids at some point when they were babies! Eloise goes to bed in her cot and I attempt to resettle her in the cot after she wakes and nurses but she usually ends up in our bed at some point in the early morning. I secretly love sleeping with her snuggled up to me but I also like that she at least spends some of the night in her own bed... </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/bed-sharing#post-2840754 Tue, 21 Aug 2018 01:10:11 +0000 MACSUNSHINE 2840754@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I do it as necessary to get good quality sleep. I did it with my son as well. I had similar mixed feelings about it but I ultimately have learned to do what works for my family and that is that.</p> <p>DS has been sleeping independently since just before 2, he now does not like for us to lay on his double mattress with him. DD is almost 11 weeks old and is sleeping in her room in a rock n play or her crib. In the early morning hours she often lands in our bed, if I am going to sleep during her nap time I bring her in our bed. When I head back to work in a few weeks that will be real test, that is when I broke last time and coslept more. I hope to not do it as last time our guest room was available right next door so I would take DS in there, we have since moved so that is not an option and bringing her in bed exclusively with my DH will likely not work. </p> <p>Do what works for you, you are aware of the risks and minimize them as much as you can. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/bed-sharing#post-2840753 Tue, 21 Aug 2018 01:00:19 +0000 CatchAFallingStar 2840753@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I said I’d NEVER do it. Then I did with my first daughter. She slept in bed with me until she turned 3 and finally wanted to sleep in her room. At the same time, we welcomed our second baby girl and I said I wouldn’t let her sleep with me like I did DD1. Here we are, 6 months later, and she’s sleeping in bed with me most of the time. I’m well aware of the risks and believe me, they terrify me to the core!! But, we both get such wonderful sleep when she’s snuggled up to me. Breastfeeding is easy, I can monitor her breathing easily and I just love having her so close. I don’t use blankets above my waist and I make sure that there’s nothing around her like pillows or stuffed animals. </p> <p>I feel guilty about it a lot. Then I try putting her in her bassinet or even her rock n play, but she wakes up so frequently that I eventually just bring her back in bed.</p> <p>I’m just curious... is there anyone else here who does this? </p> <p>Note: my DH sleeps on the floor due to severe back issues, so it’s just me and baby in a queen size bed </p>