https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Sun, 28 Jun 2026 23:26:04 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/bed-sharing-bedtime-help#post-862105 Mon, 17 Jun 2013 01:12:08 +0000 katsupgirl 862105@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Silva: my little one is only 8 months and we still bed-share. I do the nurse to sleep thing and most of the time I can put her down in the crib or on the bed without her waking. I would hold her for 20-30 minutes or lie down next to her and sneak away after a bit. It took a bunch of times doing that before I could get a decent nap out of her. This was around 6 months. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/bed-sharing-bedtime-help#post-861979 Sun, 16 Jun 2013 21:05:56 +0000 Silva 861979@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Twine: I keep reassuring myself with that. Thanks for the advice, I appreciate it! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/bed-sharing-bedtime-help#post-861973 Sun, 16 Jun 2013 20:59:38 +0000 Mrs. Twine 861973@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Silva; yep. Just exactly like that. I would feel comfortable doing it if I had a video monitor or it was a slightly older baby, but I'm paranoid. I just always managed to find other solutions that worked well enough for us that we never went there. The women who mentioned using it used it pretty much from the beginning and never had any problems. I've done the pillow thing, too, though. ;)<br /> ETA; I never did any sort of sleep training or trying to teach my children sleep habits, and they both progressed and learned things on their own. There's nothing wrong with whatever method parents choose, but you can have success even when you aren't actively trying to instill future sleep habits. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/bed-sharing-bedtime-help#post-861971 Sun, 16 Jun 2013 20:58:47 +0000 Silva 861971@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@aprk: thanks! I guess sometimes it just clicks for them. I keep thinking she will never get it if I don't help her figure it out, but you are right that they are learning huge amounts every day..so maybe tomorrow is they day! Crossing my fingers ;) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/bed-sharing-bedtime-help#post-861962 Sun, 16 Jun 2013 20:56:14 +0000 aprk 861962@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Silva: we had similar sleep issues, and it would take FOREVER to get A to sleep, and stay asleep. I feel like one day he just "got it" and there have been times in the last week or so when I just put him down awake and he manages to fall asleep on his own. I swear I haven't done anything different - these babies keep us guessing! Hope you find something that works for you soon ;) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/bed-sharing-bedtime-help#post-861961 Sun, 16 Jun 2013 20:56:10 +0000 Silva 861961@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Twine: like a sheepskin rug kind of thing? That's interesting. Right now I've been trying to put a pillow against her belly (not near her face) to try to sub for my body, so we are obviously not good poster children for safe sleeping recommendations... </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/bed-sharing-bedtime-help#post-861959 Sun, 16 Jun 2013 20:53:25 +0000 Silva 861959@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@PurpleUnicorn: video monitor is a god suggestion. I feel like I'm hovering / checking on her constantly to avoid a full wake up!</p> <p>@aprk: she gets tired in the evenings but doesn't sleep, and then lately we have had some rough nights where she is obviously over tired by 9:30 / 10 and has a hard time going down at all. I may try to shift the bedtime slowly, to help her get more sleep. She really needs a lot of help to sleep- if I don't actively get her to nap or sleep she is up for hours, or just takes 10 minute naps, and then she gets very upset :( poor thing</p> <p>@runsyellowlites: I'm hoping if I keep doing this with her she will get the hang of it. I sometimes get frustrated when it doesn't work and just go backs to doing things the way they were. I'm afraid to mess with the status quo because we are generally happy now... I just have a feeling that if it continues we will hit a breaking point and I'd really like to avoid CIO </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/bed-sharing-bedtime-help#post-861956 Sun, 16 Jun 2013 20:53:01 +0000 Mrs. Twine 861956@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Silva; I totally hear you. I freely admit to loving the times that I get right now when she is sleeping solo. Just remember that whether it comes now, or down the road, it WILL happen. So at the very least you have something to look forward to! I found that she slept better on her own at first in a rock 'n play versus on the bed (flat surface). We used it until she was almost a year old. Also, some people swear by having their little ones sleep on some sort of a wool pad (it's cozier? Retains mom's smell? I heard it several times at my LLL meetings from other bed-sharing mamas). We never did that with either girl, but it might be something to look into. As a fair warning, it might well be a "do at your own risk" type thing because I'm thinking it's not an approved bedding surface, but maybe you could use a wool mattress pad or something that has less nap to it and get the same result. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/bed-sharing-bedtime-help#post-861945 Sun, 16 Jun 2013 20:47:04 +0000 Silva 861945@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@katsupgirl: when did your kids get better at sleeping alone? Did you do anything to help them develop that skill?</p> <p>@Mrs. Twine: she gets kind of fussy in the evenings and doesn't nap in my lap as well as during the day. So she will get these 10 minute snoozes in, if anything, and gets overtired. I'm happy with co sleeping and wearing her for naps 90% of the time...I would just love a little time to myself, you know? I'm hoping to find a way to get the best of both worlds :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/bed-sharing-bedtime-help#post-861936 Sun, 16 Jun 2013 20:44:00 +0000 runsyellowlites 861936@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I would nurse her to sleep &amp; then sneak out. At first she would wake shortly after but she adjusted pretty quick. I've almost always nursed her if she woke, sometimes sitting up &amp; then putting her back down other times I'd lay down &amp; nurse her side-lying. We go to bed about 4 hours after she does.</p> <p>I used the same method for her naps... first napping with her &amp; then nursing and sneaking out (sometimes coming back to finish the nap with her others just nursing her back to sleep). It took about 3-4 months but I let her lead and when she was ready she got to where she would often go to sleep completely on her own &amp; sleep a decent nap, and we completely avoided cio or controlled crying.</p> <p>We actually have a sidecar set up for our co-bedding arrangement so she's close but also use to her own space. Often times when she wakes she'll come over to nurse (side lying) and then when she's down go to roll back onto her side! &lt;3 it! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/bed-sharing-bedtime-help#post-861933 Sun, 16 Jun 2013 20:43:15 +0000 aprk 861933@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>As for the bedtime, A started going to sleep around 9:30 and over the last two weeks (he's almost 11 weeks) he just started showing tired signs earlier and earlier every couple of days. When we tried to push him and start our routine earlier, it didn't work - even if he fell asleep earlier, he'd wake up and go to bed for real at 9:30. </p> <p>So, I guess I have no real advice other than to watch the cues. We've gotten pretty good about quickly getting him to bed as soon as we see the tired eyes or yawn. Tonight he decided to put himself to sleep at 8:30. In my opinion, he's still a little early to try and force a schedule. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/bed-sharing-bedtime-help#post-861932 Sun, 16 Jun 2013 20:42:40 +0000 PurpleUnicorn 861932@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I agree with the above. Plus vdeo monitor helps sooo much! I can get to him as soon as he as wakes but is not fully awake. I've even started nursing him halfway into naps and the past few days he's had 2 hour naps in the morning! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/bed-sharing-bedtime-help#post-861928 Sun, 16 Jun 2013 20:39:47 +0000 Mrs. Twine 861928@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>With my kids, if they were down for the night and woke up, it was very rare that they wouldn't quickly settle back to sleep if I went in and laid with them and nursed. With Lorelei I wore her for all her naps until she was about ten months. At nights I would typically hold her and Mr. T and I would talk, or watch something on Netflix and she would sleep through it. Then she went to bed with us. Now, since 12 months, she naps solo on her floor bed, and starts the night there on her own. Then we take her to bed with us when we go to bed. It sounds to me like you have a good plan-- there are lots of different ways to make bed-sharing work! I don't know if I'm answering your question very well or giving enough information, but feel free to ask whatever and I'll do my best to answer. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/bed-sharing-bedtime-help#post-861920 Sun, 16 Jun 2013 20:36:13 +0000 katsupgirl 861920@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>If I put her down before I go to bed I just have to be quick to get her if she wakes up. If she wakes up too much it becomes impossible to get her back to sleep. It's a time thing too. I just had to wait until she got better at sleeping alone. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/bed-sharing-bedtime-help#post-861901 Sun, 16 Jun 2013 20:28:30 +0000 Silva 861901@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm looking for some suggestions about how to start moving my 8 week old toward an earlier bed time.<br /> We bed share and she has been going to sleep for the night when I do. I nurse her lying down, and she is out pretty quickly.<br /> However, this means she has been going to be at about 9:30, and then I read until I'm tired.<br /> I would love to move her toward a more reasonable bed time, and everything I've read says that now is the time to work on that.</p> <p>So my plan starting tomorrow was going to be: at 7:30 start bed time routine. Nurse her to sleep and try to sneak away. When she wakes up, go in and either pat her butt or nurse her back to sleep. I go to bed around 10, she will likely wake up then so I will nurse her to sleep again.</p> <p>She has trouble sleeping alone. I'm working on trying to get her to take one nap alone each day by trying the nurse to sleep then sneak away trick...some times it works, sometimes she is up 20 minutes later.</p> <p>My concern about doing this at night is that she will wake up and have trouble going back to sleep. She usually sleeps from 9:30 to 2:30, and I really don't want to mess up that beautiful chunk of sleep for myself!</p> <p>How did other folks who co-bed manage this? Co-bedding works well for us, and I'd like to continue, but get a little more freedom in the evening for myself and husband.</p> <p>Thanks for the help...I have no idea what I'm doing! </p>