https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Sun, 05 Apr 2026 04:45:18 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/best-hours-for-dh#post-2526444 Fri, 15 Apr 2016 19:20:57 +0000 MrsSRS 2526444@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Does option 1 mean you and DH would get to spend some of your commute together? That would also be a bonus. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/best-hours-for-dh#post-2526364 Fri, 15 Apr 2016 17:07:14 +0000 BKCaribBaby 2526364@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Fore most of his career, DH has worked pretty long hours. Lately he's had so much flexibility and is home in the evenings. It makes such a difference for me and LO. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/best-hours-for-dh#post-2526354 Fri, 15 Apr 2016 16:59:58 +0000 Shantuck 2526354@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Not sure how old your children are but eventually there will be homework in the evenings so I would definitely pick Option 1 as a plan with long term potential. My 3 year old comes home from preschool with homework on occasion (which is ridiculous!). </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/best-hours-for-dh#post-2526310 Fri, 15 Apr 2016 16:07:26 +0000 bloved 2526310@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Definitely 8-4:30. I think the night time help is invaluable. Plus I feel like it is important for a couple to have time together too and this option seems like it would give you the most of that as well. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/best-hours-for-dh#post-2526302 Fri, 15 Apr 2016 15:58:04 +0000 catlady 2526302@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I voted #1! I love the fact that we always have dinners together as a family, and honestly I would hate it if I had to deal with bedtime alone. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/best-hours-for-dh#post-2526278 Fri, 15 Apr 2016 15:40:05 +0000 Mrs. High Heels 2526278@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Option 1 - I would sacrifice money for more family time, and help with bedtimes!</p> <p>Does his current 1.5 hour commute include time in traffic? Any chance the 4:30 pm end time could shorten his commute? There is a huge difference between traffic at 4:30 and traffic after 5 pm where I'm from.. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/best-hours-for-dh#post-2526272 Fri, 15 Apr 2016 15:31:13 +0000 gingerbebe 2526272@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>If the kids don't have to get up then I vote option #1. It's like date mornings with your husband and help at night. I would only consider staggered schedules if the kids had to be up at dark o'clock. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/best-hours-for-dh#post-2526258 Fri, 15 Apr 2016 15:24:21 +0000 QueensBee 2526258@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Thank you all for the thoughtful responses! My first reaction, when he forwarded me the email, was to ask for option 1, but I wanted to get some feedback. Thank you thank you!</p> <p>@petitenoisette: Good point! Frazzled mom does not always equal quality time!</p> <p>@Mrs. Pickles: Thanks!</p> <p>@Ms.Badger: I agree. I think I'd lean towards the staggered schedule and extra money with one LO. But I'm really quite frazzled in the evenings with two, and I'm not even back to work yet.</p> <p> @lovehoneybee: Good reminder about costs eventually going down. This is temporary. Can't put a price on maintaining my sanity. :wink: </p> <p>@Mamaof2: Yes, I'm going to ask if he can switch if it's not working. I think they would let him.</p> <p>@Truth Bombs: @Foodnerd81: Unfortunately, the commute time is the same because he takes a commuter rail and subway to get there.</p> <p>@gingerbebe: Right now Im home on maternity leave. The plan was that he would be with kids until 7:45am, which is when nanny arrives. I think I could ask her to come at 6:45am instead though. She would hit way less traffic at that hour. </p> <p>@Charm54: I hear you. Evenings alone with two are so hard! DD hits her witching hour right when DS gets home from school and it's grueling. :bummed: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/best-hours-for-dh#post-2526224 Fri, 15 Apr 2016 14:53:56 +0000 gingerbebe 2526224@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Who gets your kids in the mornings? Is there a nanny involved or do your kids have to get up hella early? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/best-hours-for-dh#post-2526222 Fri, 15 Apr 2016 14:50:37 +0000 Charm54 2526222@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>As someone who solo parents a lot of evenings, it absolutely sucks. I would do pretty much anything to have my DH home with us at 4:30. Quality family time each evening would be so nice. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/best-hours-for-dh#post-2526217 Fri, 15 Apr 2016 14:49:16 +0000 Smurfette 2526217@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Option 1 would be the best. Having the help at night with two kids is worth it. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/best-hours-for-dh#post-2526215 Fri, 15 Apr 2016 14:48:32 +0000 Foodnerd81 2526215@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I also want to know if his commuting time is affected by what time he leaves. I know around here leaving even half an hour earlier or later can make a huge difference. </p> <p>But assuming it doesn't, I think quality, lower stress time with both parents in the evening would be better than rushed stressed time in both mornings and evenings. So option 1. I do dinner and bedtime alone most nights and am totally frazzled and quick tempered by the end. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/best-hours-for-dh#post-2526205 Fri, 15 Apr 2016 14:37:58 +0000 snowjewelz 2526205@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I voted for option 1! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/best-hours-for-dh#post-2526195 Fri, 15 Apr 2016 14:31:44 +0000 Periwinkle 2526195@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My husband works a similar schedule to Choice #1. He leaves the house around 6:45 and is often home by 4:30. He likes to work early in the morning so this works well for him. It means I am often the one to dress our son, feed him breakfast, and take him to nursery school, but at the end of the day my husband is home and this is good because I am usually wiped out by the end of work/getting ready for dinner. He does go to the gym 3 nights a week but will wait until LO is almost ready for bedtime so the evening support is really important to me. </p> <p>I also love the idea of saving that kind of money each week, so I would also be having a tough time making this decision. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/best-hours-for-dh#post-2526179 Fri, 15 Apr 2016 14:24:02 +0000 lawbee11 2526179@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>The first for sure. Family dinners and help with bedtime routine would be the best IMO. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/best-hours-for-dh#post-2526175 Fri, 15 Apr 2016 14:22:48 +0000 Truth Bombs 2526175@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Would his commute still be 1.5 hours is he was traveling at less peak commuting hours? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/best-hours-for-dh#post-2526166 Fri, 15 Apr 2016 14:19:00 +0000 Bao 2526166@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Option 1! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/best-hours-for-dh#post-2526162 Fri, 15 Apr 2016 14:16:29 +0000 Mamaof2 2526162@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@QueensBee: I wonder if they would let him try out a new schedule for 30 days and then decide!</p> <p>Option 1 is nice but I would also consider option 2 </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/best-hours-for-dh#post-2526146 Fri, 15 Apr 2016 14:10:15 +0000 Truth Bombs 2526146@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I picked the later schedule because it minimizes the hours of the day that your kids are away from their parents. My husband I stagger our days so I go in early and leave early to pick up the kids, he goes in late (does drop off) and gets home late. Granted, he doesn't have nearly the commute your husband does. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/best-hours-for-dh#post-2526143 Fri, 15 Apr 2016 14:05:15 +0000 Ms.Badger 2526143@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>For me it's whether you value the money more or some extra time with your DH more. My DH works similar to your later schedule because we have a nanny and it saves us significant money to stagger our schedules. Some nights are hard, but this schedule works for us for now. I could totally see valuing the time with DH and his help at night more than the money, especially since you have more that 1 kid to get to bed at night. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/best-hours-for-dh#post-2526142 Fri, 15 Apr 2016 14:03:56 +0000 Adira 2526142@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Dinner together and helping with bed!!!</p> <p>Option 1! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/best-hours-for-dh#post-2526137 Fri, 15 Apr 2016 14:00:39 +0000 lovehoneybee 2526137@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>That's tough. My first instinct would be to go with Option 1. My DH works second shift most of the time, and it's really hard to do dinner/bath/bed with two kids by myself (especially one of them being only 4 months old). It's doable, but I'm whipped by the end of the night and I'm usually stressed (which sounds like you). </p> <p>But it would be really great to save $120/wk in childcare, and that might be enough to convince me to just soldier on doing solo evenings. </p> <p>I think I'd still go with Option 1. Childcare costs will eventually go down, but I think I'd want us all together more. The nights he does manage to get off early are so much easier for everyone...our preschooler doesn't feel like he's getting shafted because his screaming baby sister needs my attention first, and I'm not trying to juggle both of them and make dinner, etc. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/best-hours-for-dh#post-2526136 Fri, 15 Apr 2016 14:00:18 +0000 Mrs. Pickles 2526136@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>for me night time quality time is essential good luck! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/best-hours-for-dh#post-2526135 Fri, 15 Apr 2016 14:00:06 +0000 petitenoisette 2526135@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Frazzled mom at night trying to do dinner and put both kids to bed doesn't sound like super quality time to me. I also think having time alone with your DH on your commute (I assume part of the commute is w/o kids after drop-off) would be nice plus having time all together as a family is really important to me. </p> <p>My husband and I happen to have a similar schedule to option 1 except we leave/get home earlier and it is amazing. I honestly don't know how people do it who don't have help at night and I just have one kid! I understand you do what you have to do, but hands down I'd pick 1 unless the saved money would be like, life-changing for you as well. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/best-hours-for-dh#post-2526126 Fri, 15 Apr 2016 13:53:39 +0000 QueensBee 2526126@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>DH received an email from his office today about a new policy that allows employees to choose their own work hours. The current work day is 9:30am-6:00pm. He has a 1.5 hour commute each way, so he leaves the house at 8am and returns at 7:30pm. The new options allow employees to arrive anywhere from 8am-11am, and leave anywhere from 4:30-7:30pm. However, it has to be a set schedule (he can't change it daily). I'm so torn on what I'd even ask him to do! Bees, I need your advice!</p> <p>Option 1: 8:00am-4:30pm<br /> DH and I both leave for work at the same time and can commute together (6:45am). I get home at 4pm and he gets home by 6:00pm. We could actually have family dinners together and he could help me put our 2 LOs to sleep. I'm really struggling with dinner and bedtime routines by myself right now.</p> <p>Option 2: 11:00am-7:30pm<br /> DH could enjoy mornings with both kids and take our son to preschool each morning. This would save us about $120 in childcare each week. Overall, our kids get more time with their parents because they have quality time with him in the morning and me in the afternoon. The downside is that we never have family dinners and I never get help with bedtime. </p> <p>Option 3: 9:30-6:00pm<br /> This is his current schedule. We do have the option to continue it.</p> <p>He can start his new schedule on Monday. What do you think? </p>