https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Sun, 10 May 2026 01:37:20 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/black-babies-cost-less-to-adopt#post-946386 Fri, 19 Jul 2013 14:10:02 +0000 plantains 946386@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Jacks: interesting link and article. Thanks so much for posting. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/black-babies-cost-less-to-adopt#post-946283 Fri, 19 Jul 2013 13:47:40 +0000 Mrs. Jacks 946283@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Just so you know, this coversation has hit Yahoo. Nothing new to the debate, but I'm glad people are talking about it.</p> <p><a href="http://shine.yahoo.com/parenting/price-check-always-cheaper-adopt-black-babies-160400586.html" rel="nofollow">http://shine.yahoo.com/parenting/price-check-always-cheaper-adopt-black-babies-160400586.html</a> </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/black-babies-cost-less-to-adopt#post-938201 Wed, 17 Jul 2013 09:45:53 +0000 Mrs. Jacks 938201@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Polish: The only thing I see between the lines there is the birth parent expenses, but it is REALLY nice that they put a cap on them. Looks pretty good to me!</p> <p>@Mrs. Lemon-Lime: I felt that with the agency that we went with, it really wasn't hogwash. They had extra reading material and extra counseling for white families who were adopting transracially and they were extremely supportive of our birth mother and father (and still are)! They have a number of testimonials from African American adoptive parents, and I think they do outreach to the community to find AA adoptive parents. I know there was a situation that we might have been interested in, but the birth mom specifically wanted a black family and the agency was working hard to find the right family. </p> <p>We couldn't have asked for a better experience, but of course I wasn't behind the scenes. I did feel that everything was done completely ethically and with the best interest of the birth parents at heart... even when that was tougher for us.</p> <p>I don't think every agency is that way. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/black-babies-cost-less-to-adopt#post-937836 Wed, 17 Jul 2013 08:21:36 +0000 Mrs. Lemon-Lime 937836@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Jacks: you answered my question...hopefully that is not hogwash. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/black-babies-cost-less-to-adopt#post-937835 Wed, 17 Jul 2013 08:21:28 +0000 Mrs. Polish 937835@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Jacks: Would you look at this and see if there is a between the lines thing that I'm missing?</p> <p><a href="http://lssin.org/content/FeeSchedule-DomesticAdoption.pdf" rel="nofollow">http://lssin.org/content/FeeSchedule-DomesticAdoption.pdf</a> </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/black-babies-cost-less-to-adopt#post-937826 Wed, 17 Jul 2013 08:19:14 +0000 Mrs. Lemon-Lime 937826@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I didn't know there was a price difference either; I only knew black babies were more readily available. </p> <p>Where does the premium for white and Asian babies go? Is that just pure profit because people are willing to pay? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/black-babies-cost-less-to-adopt#post-937812 Wed, 17 Jul 2013 08:16:40 +0000 Mrs. Jacks 937812@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Polish: @ Mrs. Bells: most agencies have a price differential. The ones I found that didn't always share their strong ethical concerns on their website and are usually found in pretty progressive areas. So, I'm thinking about PACT in Oakland, and some other california agencies. There were no agencies in my state with across the board prices :(</p> <p>When I spoke with agencies here, they flipped the logic a little bit saying that their true mission is to place AA kids and they use the high fees that they get from. Caucasian adoptions to subsidize the placement of black infants. They also said that they have a strong commitment to placing in black families when possible and that the lower fees enable that to happen more often,</p> <p>I don't totally agree and my personal opinion is that all babies have the same value. But honestly (and I hate to say this), after the Zimmerman trial, I think many families are going to worry about adopting black boys and the challenges of raising them in the current social/cultural environment. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/black-babies-cost-less-to-adopt#post-937793 Wed, 17 Jul 2013 08:11:03 +0000 LuLu Mom 937793@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>This breaks my heart completley. No child should have a price tag over their head based on race or gender, it's disgusting. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/black-babies-cost-less-to-adopt#post-937760 Wed, 17 Jul 2013 08:02:47 +0000 Mrsbells 937760@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@kiddosc: I wasnt aware of this.. I always thought it was only cheaper if you did an international adoption from a developing country in say Africa or Asia but I didnt know that even within america there were different prices for different races </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/black-babies-cost-less-to-adopt#post-937746 Wed, 17 Jul 2013 08:01:05 +0000 Mrs. Polish 937746@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Train: the agency we used for our home study was the same way. All domestic adoptions cost the same, but depending on your preferences you may wait longer. </p> <p>I've never heard of a price difference before now. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/black-babies-cost-less-to-adopt#post-898380 Mon, 01 Jul 2013 11:26:57 +0000 Mrs. Train 898380@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Pricing of adoption also depends on how you go about it. Our agency had a set price for domestic infant adoptions. It didn't matter what the race of the baby was. It does make me so sad to think that babies have a varying price based in their skin color but in some situations that is how it goes. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/black-babies-cost-less-to-adopt#post-892349 Fri, 28 Jun 2013 01:32:49 +0000 Mrs. Jacks 892349@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@MrsCB: I have a blog post about transracial adoption/ talking about race that gives some recommended reading on the subject that you might find useful.</p> <p>@bluestriped bee: International comes out roughly equivalent to domestic infant, actually when you factor in all costs. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/black-babies-cost-less-to-adopt#post-888426 Thu, 27 Jun 2013 09:58:50 +0000 BSB 888426@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@kiddosc: Ah, ok. Thanks! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/black-babies-cost-less-to-adopt#post-888410 Thu, 27 Jun 2013 09:55:49 +0000 kiddosc 888410@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@bluestriped bee: This is for domestic adoptions. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/black-babies-cost-less-to-adopt#post-888400 Thu, 27 Jun 2013 09:53:38 +0000 kiddosc 888400@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@pui: I don't think it's the system's fault either. I think it's just a reality of the world we live in. It's still kind of difficult to hear though. </p> <p>@brownie: I don't really think that anyone is commenting on how adoptive parents shouldn't take cost into consideration, or blaming them for choosing an option that could let them bring a child home sooner and with more confidence in the placement. Just that it's kind of a sad reality of the world we live in. It is obviously an emotional and personal journey for each family </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/black-babies-cost-less-to-adopt#post-888399 Thu, 27 Jun 2013 09:53:30 +0000 BSB 888399@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Is this for international adoptions or were they talking about domestic adoptions?</p> <p>I know international adoptions like from Ethiopia are cheaper but could it be because they are a third world country where they are more concerned about finding homes for the orphans then about money. Like they don't have to charge as much as Korea or China... a more developed country? I'm just curious. I have no idea.</p> <p>I do agree that there is a supply and demand for Asian babies. When we adopt, since I'm vietnamese, I would like to adopt an Asian or a mixed baby. Although, if we found a baby that we fell in love with, it doesn't matter the race.</p> <p>Also, aren't there probably government requirements, too. I would like China and Korea's government would have more costly fees (maybe excessive) than African American countries. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/black-babies-cost-less-to-adopt#post-888359 Thu, 27 Jun 2013 09:46:34 +0000 ShootingStar 888359@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>This is really sad :(. I had heard when I adopted my dog that black dogs are the last to go, and part of the reason why I got the dog I did. But I didn't realize it was true for people, too :(.</p> <p>I've been seriously considering adoption for our 2nd child, as pregnancy has been really hard on me. I'm a little leery of adopting a child from a different race because of the challenges/comments we'd face as a family, as well as how the baby would feel about it. But maybe I should reconsider my thinking. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/black-babies-cost-less-to-adopt#post-888355 Thu, 27 Jun 2013 09:46:14 +0000 brownie 888355@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Until you are there you don't know what your options would be. Not every agency works this way and there are still low cost adoptions such as foster care to adopt but they all come with their problems. </p> <p>When you get married you think you can have the family you dream of. Then after 2 or 3 years you are still not pregnant. So you go to the IVF clinic. You shell out over $60,000 in failed IVF, FET and other treatments because they can't find anything wrong (or they do find something wrong and you can never have your own babies). </p> <p>You have to make a decision here. Is the baby going to be part of one of you (sperm donor, egg donor, surrogate)? or neither of you (embryo adoption or adoption). If you are lucky and you can a sperm donor may be a great option. It's relatively cheap.</p> <p>But that may not be an option and a surrogate is another $60k (seriously those women actually get paid). So you look into an adoption. It has been over 4 years since you expected to have your family. All of your friends have had kids and possibly multiples at this point. So you want your baby and you want it now.</p> <p>You go to the adoption center and they tell you for $30k they can guarantee you a newborn baby in the next year as long as you don't care if it looks like you. And if you want the challenge, there are many special needs babies who are available and you can have them for even less but of course in the long run they cost you more. If you want a baby that looks like you well that is $50k. (so the difference is 90k or 110k). Yes there are tax deductions you can claim but they are hard and not the full amount.</p> <p>So you jump for a baby, any baby at this point because you know that this is what is supposed to happen for you.</p> <p>Of course, there are other options. You could find an OB that has single unmarried women open to adoption that will put your husband on the birth certificate. Or you could foster adopt and wait many more years for an infant or get your kids yanked because the parents shaped up. These are reduced costs but have many other problems.</p> <p>You could find a women and do a completely private adoption. This is about 40k as well but you get to choose. Of course, this isn't teenage girls who are giving up their babies. Teens tend to keep their babies. This is a young women with some college who can't fathom a baby in their life right now. You are responsible for any and all medical costs associated with the pregnancy, the lawyers and the court fees. So instead of a straight 30k it is whatever ends up happening. If this women is uninsured or under insured this could be more expensive.</p> <p>My sister has two african -american children in her home. She would not change them for the world. My best friend adopted her baby through private adoption (she was a friend of a friend). My other friend is in the middle of fost-adopt and has been called 5 times and the placement has fallen through each of the times. She has only been waiting for 1 year. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/black-babies-cost-less-to-adopt#post-888329 Thu, 27 Jun 2013 09:42:55 +0000 mrsjazz 888329@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I heard about this when I was researching domestic adoptions. It made me sad to find out there are so many little Black children waiting for adoption who are basically marked down for sale. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/black-babies-cost-less-to-adopt#post-888212 Thu, 27 Jun 2013 09:28:46 +0000 plantains 888212@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>This whole story makes me so sad. What a world we live in. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/black-babies-cost-less-to-adopt#post-888056 Thu, 27 Jun 2013 09:09:01 +0000 pui 888056@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>In a perfect world, it wouldn't cost so much and be so hard to adopt in the first place, although I can see why we need the cost and the restrictions.</p> <p>I really don't think this is the system's fault... it's the population. It's sad but true that more people adopting want an Asian or Caucasian child before an African American one. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/black-babies-cost-less-to-adopt#post-888055 Thu, 27 Jun 2013 09:08:59 +0000 Dandelion 888055@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>That's crazy! I'm so (sadly) naive about a lot of these issues. In a world where everyone strives for equality, you'd think that all human babies would be equal, too. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/black-babies-cost-less-to-adopt#post-888054 Thu, 27 Jun 2013 09:08:50 +0000 brownie 888054@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I don't know that they are sellable, they are trying to encourage behaviors that we wouldn't necessarily do in the first place. If all babies were equal then we would have lots of baby that wouldn't get adopted because people would wait for "perfect". They are doing something financial to encourage people to engage on an activity (adopt babies who may not be adopted otherwise). Much like our mortgage interest deductions or cigarette taxes. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/black-babies-cost-less-to-adopt#post-888045 Thu, 27 Jun 2013 09:07:41 +0000 Modern Daisy 888045@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Wow, this is crazy! I don't know anything about it and haven't read the article but in a way I guess it makes sense to make a certain race more affordable to adopt if there is either a disproportionate amount of adoptable babies from that race or if they are considered less 'desired' for whatever reason by the adoptive parent population - just to give those babies an equal chance. I'm assuming that's why it is the way it is? Why else would it be? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/black-babies-cost-less-to-adopt#post-887999 Thu, 27 Jun 2013 09:00:04 +0000 BKCaribBaby 887999@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Although I have never explored adoption, I've known about this for years. It is not surprising to me.</p> <p>@Bookworm::... but it also gives the impression that white babies are worth more, and that people should be willing to pay to have one. The whole thing made me sad. :/" - Well said. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/black-babies-cost-less-to-adopt#post-887968 Thu, 27 Jun 2013 08:55:50 +0000 kiddosc 887968@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@brownie: yea, I totally get the supply and demand aspect, it makes sense. It's weird to think of human babies as a sellable good though. </p> <p>In a perfect world all babies would be adoptable for the same fee... but we are far from a perfect world. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/black-babies-cost-less-to-adopt#post-887938 Thu, 27 Jun 2013 08:52:18 +0000 ValentineMommy 887938@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>As an adopted white person, it's sadly true. I agree with @brownie: that it's supply and demand, but it's sad. I went back to the adoption agency that I came from when I was in high school. They told me it took years to get a white child, but there was literally a catalog of African American babies to chose from. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/black-babies-cost-less-to-adopt#post-887905 Thu, 27 Jun 2013 08:48:33 +0000 brownie 887905@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Oh absolutely. My sister was in a hurry to adopt but didn't have enough money so she chose and African American baby instead of Asian or white because it was cheaper. She loves her baby and it worked well and she always wanted a mixed family if she was adopted. Technically it is supply and demand. Some babies have less demand and so they cost less to adopt. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/black-babies-cost-less-to-adopt#post-887900 Thu, 27 Jun 2013 08:47:54 +0000 dagret 887900@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I heard the same story this morning (and thought, I've got to post this on HB!) and my jaw dropped at the cost disparity. And I felt really bad for the mom when she was talking about her son being old enough to realize what ignorant comments people were saying to them. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/black-babies-cost-less-to-adopt#post-887896 Thu, 27 Jun 2013 08:47:10 +0000 mrsjyw 887896@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>This makes me really sad. Putting a $ sign over a baby's head?... :( Def agree that it should be a flat fee for adoption... </p>