https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Sat, 02 May 2026 02:43:59 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/but-all-your-education-is-going-to-waste#post-1734568 Tue, 01 Jul 2014 15:06:11 +0000 googly-eyes 1734568@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>You cannot win this argument. :(</p> <p>Hugs. You are not wasting anything. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/but-all-your-education-is-going-to-waste#post-1734452 Tue, 01 Jul 2014 14:02:27 +0000 psw27 1734452@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Blah. Love the peanut gallery. I agree, you're damned if you do, damned if you don't. </p> <p>@Danizaur: HA that episode makes me laugh just thinking about it. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/but-all-your-education-is-going-to-waste#post-1734344 Tue, 01 Jul 2014 13:25:50 +0000 artsyfartsy 1734344@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I have a picture on my desk of my baby and I get a lot of questions about how old he is and such. When I mention he's 4 months I get a look like "That's awful young to not have his mom at home with him." Blah blah blah. Mind ya business</p> <p>ETA: </p> [attach=3847/14/n81pwi.290x200.image.jpg] https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/but-all-your-education-is-going-to-waste#post-1734327 Tue, 01 Jul 2014 13:18:48 +0000 littleredhairedgrl 1734327@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>it's amazing how the unwanted opinions and advice begin pouring out so quickly after having a child. dd is only 6 weeks and i won't be returning to work and i've already heard things from friends who are returning to work about how it must be nice to be able to stop working, won't i be bored, what will i do all day etc. etc. besides the fact that dd was born 2 months early and needing extra care, dh and i made a decision that works for us and don't need the negative or judgmental opinions of others.. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/but-all-your-education-is-going-to-waste#post-1733077 Mon, 30 Jun 2014 19:06:06 +0000 RubyCali 1733077@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>It is really interesting to hear everyone's stories on both sides. As others have said, someone will always have an opinion either way. I'm confident in my choice, but I think I need to project more confidence to others rather than trying to justify my choice to them. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/but-all-your-education-is-going-to-waste#post-1732920 Mon, 30 Jun 2014 16:37:55 +0000 MamaBehr 1732920@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Sometimes I feel that way about myself, especially as we right each check to pay back student loans, but my mom always tells me "you are a teacher who is taking a break." For some reason that makes me feel better about "not using my education," because I will use it again when I am not needed by my children to stay at home with them. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/but-all-your-education-is-going-to-waste#post-1732863 Mon, 30 Jun 2014 16:08:17 +0000 2PeasinaPod 1732863@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@jetsa: I hear that all the time from my mom.</p> <p>I recently told her that the mom two houses up stays home with her boys, and my mom made a comment about how her husband must make an awful lot of money to be able to afford a house like we do on only one salary. I wanted to punch her. </p> <p>What works for others may not be what works for you and your family. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/but-all-your-education-is-going-to-waste#post-1732850 Mon, 30 Jun 2014 15:59:53 +0000 deactivated_account 1732850@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@RubyCali: Don't feel bad! Even if I was to stay at home, I'd still be so very happy with all I gained from my education. You education is something no one can ever take away from you. You are better with it than without it. Don't let some old guy make you feel bad about anything! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/but-all-your-education-is-going-to-waste#post-1732845 Mon, 30 Jun 2014 15:56:49 +0000 RubyCali 1732845@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@BeatlesFan629: That's awful! Don't you just love unsolicited advice.</p> <p>@Greentea: How do you refer to staying home when people ask you what you do for a living? I don't particularly like the term "stay at home mom" but I'm not sure what else to call it.</p> <p>Thanks for all the support :heart: I'm sorry to hear that so many of you have been criticized for your choices too! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/but-all-your-education-is-going-to-waste#post-1732843 Mon, 30 Jun 2014 15:55:39 +0000 Tanjowen 1732843@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@RubyCali: That is such a terrible thing for anybody to say, and so untrue. Your education isn't going anywhere and you can always further it later if you wish. Staying home is hard, but it's great if you can do it!</p> <p>And knowing how much my friends miss their LO's they send to daycare but have to/want to work, I'm so sad people don't offer working mamma's encouragement rather than shaming them. At the end of the day, if your child is loved and knows it, that's all that matters! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/but-all-your-education-is-going-to-waste#post-1732836 Mon, 30 Jun 2014 15:52:43 +0000 My Only Sunshine 1732836@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>It's true, you absolutely can't win. I work part-time and get it from both sides! My mother-in-law has said multiple times "It's just such a shame she has to be in daycare."</p> <p>Meanwhile a coworker said "It's a shame to see young women like you throw their careers away at such an important time in life."</p> <p>So either way, some nosy people will see your decision as "such a shame." People need to back off. Everyone makes the decision that's best for their families and they and their kiddos end up great either way. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/but-all-your-education-is-going-to-waste#post-1732779 Mon, 30 Jun 2014 15:25:13 +0000 Mrs.ThinMint 1732779@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>This is one of those things you just can't win on. It's so frustrating. I'm pregnant and going to be a SAHM. My grandmother tells me that I should work full time, get even more education, but still do all the cooking, cleaning, etc and that my husband shouldn't have to do anything. . . Crazy. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/but-all-your-education-is-going-to-waste#post-1732774 Mon, 30 Jun 2014 15:23:44 +0000 blackbird 1732774@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>You are damned if you do, and damned if you don't, honey. And hopefully this guy keeps his mouth shut from now on! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/but-all-your-education-is-going-to-waste#post-1732772 Mon, 30 Jun 2014 15:23:19 +0000 BeatlesFan629 1732772@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My neighbor shamed me for sending dd to daycare. When she first saw me outside with the baby she asked who would be watching her and her response when I told her daycare was: "**gasp!** Oh no, no, no, no, no. Isn't there another way?"<br /> I just walked away </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/but-all-your-education-is-going-to-waste#post-1732765 Mon, 30 Jun 2014 15:20:35 +0000 jetsa 1732765@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@rachiecakes: @avivoca: @LuLu Mom: :heart: me too ladies, <i>"that baby wouldn't be sick so often if you'd take him out of daycare"</i> </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/but-all-your-education-is-going-to-waste#post-1732764 Mon, 30 Jun 2014 15:20:14 +0000 RubyCali 1732764@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Blue: And the thing is, my profession was working with special needs children to teach them language, social/play, and daily living skills! As I stumbled over my words my husband jumped in with, "I'm sure she will have plenty of opportunities to apply her education with our daughter!"</p> <p>It makes me so sad that people think they have a right to judge our decisions to work or stay home. Aren't we all just doing the best we can do for our families?! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/but-all-your-education-is-going-to-waste#post-1732762 Mon, 30 Jun 2014 15:19:45 +0000 Greentea 1732762@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@RubyCali: wow. He is so wrong. Honestly I don't agree with him. I have a butt load of education and I feel very proud of it and very proud of "staying home"- not that I call it that. I am taking care of my daughter. For me personally it is the hardest, most demanding thing I have ever done. It is important, requires sacrifice and it deserves respect. No education is wasted. You are a better person and a better mom and most likely more secure for your education and it benefits you, lo and others is many ways- life isn't just about income buddy (to your father's friend.) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/but-all-your-education-is-going-to-waste#post-1732759 Mon, 30 Jun 2014 15:19:19 +0000 JerricaBenton 1732759@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Blue: exactly! </p> <p>Your child is lucky to have a smart, educated, go-getter home with her every day! I use my education, experiences and interests every day to try and raise my daughter the best way I can! Don't let it get to you. You know what they say about opinions ;-) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/but-all-your-education-is-going-to-waste#post-1732752 Mon, 30 Jun 2014 15:16:35 +0000 septca 1732752@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>It's rude to comment on someone's decision to work or stay at home. Period.</p> <p>At the same time, I applaud a *man* of a *different generation* appreciating you for your brain rather than your birthing hips. It seems like he meant it as a compliment to your intelligence and ambition, so take it as a compliment and move on. Regardless of your work status, my opinion is that nothing is better for kids than a mother confident in her decisions. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/but-all-your-education-is-going-to-waste#post-1732746 Mon, 30 Jun 2014 15:15:01 +0000 Glitter 1732746@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My mom tells me this all the time. LO is 8 weeks old and Im planning to SAH or, if a very flexible situation arises, WAH. She keeps saying that all my scholarships and education would just be hanging in mid-air. My sis also said that she finds it ungrateful to let your parents sacrifice so that you can get an education, then decide not to use it. Sigh. That talk annoys me to no end! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/but-all-your-education-is-going-to-waste#post-1732737 Mon, 30 Jun 2014 15:11:24 +0000 rachiecakes 1732737@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@RubyCali: :heart: we all try to do what's best for our families. Like @avivoca &amp; @LuLu Mom , I get it from the other side. Comments about how my baby is growing up while I'm away at work... like I don't miss him all day long but know I have to provide for my family, too. Ugh. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/but-all-your-education-is-going-to-waste#post-1732725 Mon, 30 Jun 2014 15:07:47 +0000 illumina 1732725@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>When I am caught off guard and someone offends me I often react rather rudely and would probably have said something like "I don't see the point in having kids only to let someone else raise them the majority of the time!". Which would not have gone down well! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/but-all-your-education-is-going-to-waste#post-1732720 Mon, 30 Jun 2014 15:05:52 +0000 Mrs. Blue 1732720@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>That hacks me off. Raising your child &amp; teaching them is a waste of your education!??! How about thinking your LO is lucky because they have a smart, go-getter mom who will apply herself to giving your LO the best foundation, best teaching, best childhood experience that she can! Grrrrrr! I'm sensitive about that as well since I have a lot of education that I won't be "using" when I start staying home, but I truly think the logic of this that line of thought is so faulty. Is it better that someone uneducated takes care of my kids?? How the heck is it a waste of my education to use all I know to raise my kids?? Ugh. I'm sorry you had to hear that from someone. Knowing people think that is different than hearing someone say it out loud.</p> <p>ETA: I also get it from the other side. All I heard at first is how nice it would be if I could stay home. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/but-all-your-education-is-going-to-waste#post-1732718 Mon, 30 Jun 2014 15:05:26 +0000 avivoca 1732718@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Every time my daughter gets sick, my MIL says that she wishes that she didn't have to go to daycare and that my husband and I need to find a way to keep her out of daycare. It hurts because I want to stay home, but financially it's better for us if I work right now.</p> <p>Don't listen to him. Haters gonna hate, and you know what is best for your family.</p> <p> :heart: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/but-all-your-education-is-going-to-waste#post-1732717 Mon, 30 Jun 2014 15:05:15 +0000 LuLu Mom 1732717@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I've heard a couple times from my MIL tings like "I wish you could swing it for you to stay home, it really is best for children." Never comes off super judgy, but doesn't make me feel any better. Yeah I wish we could afford it too, but I'd hate to tell her I'm the bread winner so we need my income, I don't think that would go over well. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/but-all-your-education-is-going-to-waste#post-1732710 Mon, 30 Jun 2014 15:00:58 +0000 RubyCali 1732710@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>This weekend my friend's father told me that he thinks I should be going back to work instead of staying home with my daughter. "But all your education is going to waste!" he exclaimed before turning to my husband and saying, "She was always such a go-getter growing up." Ouch. </p> <p>I am very happy in my choice to stay home and know that it is the best decision for our family, but I just can't shake his words. I have always had an insecurity that people are judging me for my decision, but I have never had anyone say anything so openly. It caught me off guard!</p> <p>Have you ever been criticized for your decision to stay home or go to work? How did you react? </p>