https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Sun, 12 Apr 2026 22:13:25 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/buying-for-the-kids-consult-your-so#post-2787495 Sat, 18 Nov 2017 16:43:24 +0000 looch 2787495@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Lemon-Lime: Put things in the save for later area....that's what I do! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/buying-for-the-kids-consult-your-so#post-2787493 Sat, 18 Nov 2017 16:37:52 +0000 Portboston 2787493@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I agree with Truthbombs. 100% </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/buying-for-the-kids-consult-your-so#post-2787492 Sat, 18 Nov 2017 16:36:57 +0000 Portboston 2787492@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We try to only buy larger items for holidays and birthdays and those we do consult each other on. Small things like a coloring or sticker book, we don’t. My husband is extremely opinionated (a blessing and a curse) so we run everything bigger by each other. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/buying-for-the-kids-consult-your-so#post-2787442 Sat, 18 Nov 2017 13:17:43 +0000 2littlepumpkins 2787442@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Lemon-Lime: Yeah I think you did great. Kid things tend not to be so pretty. We had a cheaper one of those and it didn't last more than a few months because dd broke it acting wild. (If I remember right she was hiding? Or something like that and ran in and pulled on a pole thing that was in there and it snapped. We temporarily fixed it for awhile but then got rid of it.) Which I didn't mind because I didn't want it in my living room forever. So there's always that. :silly: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/buying-for-the-kids-consult-your-so#post-2787366 Sat, 18 Nov 2017 03:41:02 +0000 Mrs. Lemon-Lime 2787366@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@looch: the tent is great. LO has only had it for one evening, but so far he really likes being inside it. I just wanted a more decorative tent like the ones Target and Lad of Nod sell. DH only shops on Amazon and while they have decorative options he didn't choose one of those. We share an Amazon account and I'll likely start going in every other day to see what he has in the cart. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/buying-for-the-kids-consult-your-so#post-2787324 Fri, 17 Nov 2017 21:16:23 +0000 looch 2787324@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Lemon-Lime: What's the matter with the tent? Do you not like it? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/buying-for-the-kids-consult-your-so#post-2787251 Fri, 17 Nov 2017 15:49:03 +0000 PawPrints 2787251@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Lemon-Lime: Yes I meant my comments to be directed at your DH saying that to you - so yeah if you are peeved then I would say I agree with you feeling that way. Like, it kind of feels like a disrespectful thing to even say out loud to your spouse, right? Like can't he tell you wouldn't be bringing it up unless it bothers you, therefore it's not 100% cool for him to be doing this all the time. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/buying-for-the-kids-consult-your-so#post-2787244 Fri, 17 Nov 2017 15:41:11 +0000 Purpledaisy 2787244@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We discuss bday/Christmas presents but I pretty much do all of the buying and rarely consult him. He also doesn't care and would be completely fine with not discussing presents :silly: . He will sometimes get them something small and he doesn't ask. </p> <p>I think we just trust each other to make good decisions and he knows I would want a say in anything big so he leaves that stuff to me. I think it also helps that we have separate finances so if I buy the kids something just because I do it out of my own money. Presents and stuff that they need we go halvies on. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/buying-for-the-kids-consult-your-so#post-2787242 Fri, 17 Nov 2017 15:41:07 +0000 Mrs. Lemon-Lime 2787242@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Truth Bombs: yes, that’s it. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/buying-for-the-kids-consult-your-so#post-2787235 Fri, 17 Nov 2017 15:28:39 +0000 Mrs. Lemon-Lime 2787235@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@PawPrints: no, that's what DH says to me when I complain he didn't consult me. He tells me to just buy him stuff when I feel like- no need to consult him or save something for an event (bday, holiday). </p> <p>I am peeved that he doesn't consult me on things hence the post. One byproduct of the tent "lemon" is that the room that it's in can now become a defacto playroom.</p> <p>@2littlepumpkins: thanks, I tried. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/buying-for-the-kids-consult-your-so#post-2787233 Fri, 17 Nov 2017 15:27:15 +0000 Truth Bombs 2787233@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@PawPrints: I absolutely feel like "I can buy my kids whatever I want whenever I want". Part of the basis of our marriage is that my husband and I trust each other to make wise financial decisions. As long as I'm not buying something we can't afford, I would be pretty annoyed if my husband told me I had to clear it with him every time I bought something for the kids.</p> <p>That being said, @Mrs. Lemon-Lime: , I think the issue here is less about buying things without discussing and more about being respectful of your opinions. It seems your husband thinks he knows better than you. If I had an idea of something I wanted to get my kids, my husband told me no, and then went and bought a version he liked better without discussing it with me, there would be some real issues based on the disrespectful behavior more so than the actual purchase of a teepee. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/buying-for-the-kids-consult-your-so#post-2787172 Fri, 17 Nov 2017 13:41:48 +0000 PawPrints 2787172@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>"I can buy him whatever I like whenever"</p> <p>Whoa. What? No. Nobody gets to buy whatever they like whenever they want. Your/DH's money is yours, collectively, as a married couple. You both get input on how it's spent. That's how marriage works. </p> <p>Your DH's behavior would be a huge issue in our household, since we take a slightly minimalist approach to toys/gear and I'd be pretty appalled by a never ending stream of large expensive toys showing up, but it sounds like you're pretty cool with it so I guess if it works for you that's great. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/buying-for-the-kids-consult-your-so#post-2787156 Fri, 17 Nov 2017 12:52:53 +0000 wrkbrk 2787156@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Lemon-Lime: I don’t unless it’s a big item. For something like a play tent, yes!! DW doesn’t really do online shopping 😂 </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/buying-for-the-kids-consult-your-so#post-2787148 Fri, 17 Nov 2017 12:41:11 +0000 autumnleaves 2787148@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I wishlist whatever I think the boys will like for toys/games but then review the items with DH before buying them or recommending to family to buy them. With clothes DH is particular with what he likes for the boys so I take that into account when buying or recommending to family what to buy. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/buying-for-the-kids-consult-your-so#post-2787146 Fri, 17 Nov 2017 12:37:03 +0000 2littlepumpkins 2787146@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Oh, also, your set up is super cute! :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/buying-for-the-kids-consult-your-so#post-2787145 Fri, 17 Nov 2017 12:35:49 +0000 2littlepumpkins 2787145@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We do birthdays and Xmas together but other than that it's usually me that buys stuff because I do the runs to target/wherever. Sometimes Dh buys stuff but if it's not a big purchase it's nbd whether I like it or not. We don't have to keep it forever. If he brought home a duplicate we'd just return it. We also rotate some of the toys using plastic bins so I don't have to keep EVERYTHING out all the time. (With dd she was at home full time til three and we've kept stuff between kids and are expecting #3 soon so we can't have all of that stuff out all the time.) Now for ME if my Dh was constantly buying stuff, even little stuff, I would have to argue about that because I don't want the house to look like hoarders!! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/buying-for-the-kids-consult-your-so#post-2787144 Fri, 17 Nov 2017 12:33:23 +0000 Bluemasonjar 2787144@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>DH and I consult on larger things for sure but I am usually the one that picks up things for DS when I am at Target on a whim and often from the dollar bins. We don't buy much for DS on a regular basis though so it isn't often. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/buying-for-the-kids-consult-your-so#post-2787132 Fri, 17 Nov 2017 11:54:16 +0000 PinkElephant 2787132@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>DH rarely buys anything for the kids, but complains when I do, haha. Sometimes he'd like input (bikes), and some things I tell him I'm not buying b/c I know nothing about it, and he does (soccer equipment). </p> <p>Often DH says he wants to buy them something (bikes) but doesn't get around to it, so I just buy anyway. I used to want and wait for his opinion on things, but now I realize that getting it might mean I wait a LONG time. </p> <p>In general, if I want them to have it, I need to purchase it. I try to run it by him if it's going to take up real estate (like an activity table or tent), but ultimately I am the one who looks at it all day and knows what will really work the best, so I give myself overrule/veto power.</p> <p>SO IN SHORT:<br /> I don't think consulting is really necessary, unless one of you is doing all the buying and the other feels cheated/like they are missing out on the fun. It sounds like you might feel that way (and I get it - in your shoes, I'd feel that way too!!) - so in your case, maybe you and DH can come to an agreement about shopping together for bigger items, or limiting small purchases made without talking to a certain quantity or dollar amount so that you both get to do some selecting? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/buying-for-the-kids-consult-your-so#post-2787125 Fri, 17 Nov 2017 11:22:48 +0000 nana87 2787125@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm usually the one who picks out gifts, but I would always run bigger things by dh. I def wouldn't get a tent without talking to him! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/buying-for-the-kids-consult-your-so#post-2787121 Fri, 17 Nov 2017 11:16:18 +0000 peachykeen 2787121@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>DH doesn't buy anything for our LOs. He does take the older one for experiences more often (and I assume will continue with DD2). I generally make a list for birthday and Christmas and run it by him to get his input but he usually defers to me unless he thinks something's really silly or over the top. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/buying-for-the-kids-consult-your-so#post-2787111 Fri, 17 Nov 2017 10:55:27 +0000 hellobeeboston 2787111@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Yes, we generally consult with each other about purchases. But we’ve both purchased items without telling each other a few times, usually smaller items. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/buying-for-the-kids-consult-your-so#post-2787106 Fri, 17 Nov 2017 10:48:38 +0000 Mae 2787106@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We consult each other if it is something that will take up room. So books, small toys, etc-- I have no issue with whatever he buys. But I'd be annoyed if he bought a tent bc it takes up a lot of room and i feel like that's something we should decide together. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/buying-for-the-kids-consult-your-so#post-2787103 Fri, 17 Nov 2017 10:39:56 +0000 krispi 2787103@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We discuss big purchases, like birthday or Christmas gifts. (We rarely make big purchases outside those special holidays.) Once we decide what to get, I usually research and make the purchase. Small things throughout the year we don't really consult on. It's still usually me buying those things. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/buying-for-the-kids-consult-your-so#post-2787098 Fri, 17 Nov 2017 10:28:49 +0000 snowjewelz 2787098@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>DH would need to consult me before he buys anything, which he rarely does. I don't have to consult him unless it's a big purchase. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/buying-for-the-kids-consult-your-so#post-2787094 Fri, 17 Nov 2017 10:20:37 +0000 babypugs 2787094@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>DH buys crap for the kids all the time that they will play with for a few days then forget about. It drives me insane because it's not a "special treat" if you get something every couple of days. It's never anything expensive but that stuff adds up! I put much more thought and conversation into my purchases and firmly believe that that's the way to go (at least in my family). </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/buying-for-the-kids-consult-your-so#post-2787089 Fri, 17 Nov 2017 10:09:17 +0000 Anagram 2787089@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Lemon-Lime: We almost always run kid purchases by the other, or let's say 80% of the time. We live in a small place, so we really have to.</p> <p>Sometimes one of us will randomly buy a toy or something we see for agood deal---but my husband and I both have very strong opinions about, well, everything. So it's really best for us to negotiate a bit before buying more toys. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/buying-for-the-kids-consult-your-so#post-2787081 Fri, 17 Nov 2017 10:00:24 +0000 DesertDreams88 2787081@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>oh yes, definitely size / value matters for consulting!! good points above. I don't consult for small/medium items, but I do for large ones. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/buying-for-the-kids-consult-your-so#post-2787075 Fri, 17 Nov 2017 09:52:58 +0000 Mrs. Lemon-Lime 2787075@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>So what I’m hearing is that toys and books are fair game. If I actually liked what he chose I probably wouldn’t mind at all. When I first brought up tents and showed him some DH said LO didn’t need a tent and then he goes and buys a plain white tent. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/buying-for-the-kids-consult-your-so#post-2787068 Fri, 17 Nov 2017 09:33:34 +0000 birdofafeather 2787068@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I’m the buyer so when DH gets something I usually let it go, but we do ask about large items like a teepee because that would take up half a room. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/buying-for-the-kids-consult-your-so#post-2787066 Fri, 17 Nov 2017 09:21:10 +0000 muffinsmuffins 2787066@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I am definitely more then buyer in our relationship but for big items we usually consult. Mostly because we both get excited to buy something cool! DW is more practical and thinks things through a lot more...which means she can be at a store for 3 hours and not buy anything ha </p> <p>I did recently get a free used play tent that DW rolled her eyes at but I just said I was getting it and we could give it away if he didn't like it...we still have it but I joked she can't come in it because it was my idea :silly: </p> <p>I've been buying a lot of things for DS at Costco and basically just told her I would get what I wanted when I saw it and if she didn't like it I could return it which she agreed to. </p>