https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Tue, 14 Apr 2026 14:41:11 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/can-you-recommend-any-good-natural-birthbreastfeeding-resources-for-dad#post-1520712 Tue, 25 Mar 2014 16:00:51 +0000 IRunForFun 1520712@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mae: I think the book @septca: recommended, "The Birth Partner", even has little summaries at the end of each section that include all the key points, as well a pages that outline techniques for rhythm breathing, massage and counter-pressure, laboring and birthing positions, etc, and when to use which technique. You could get a copy of the book from the library, photo copy those pages, and circle/highlight the things that are important to you. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/can-you-recommend-any-good-natural-birthbreastfeeding-resources-for-dad#post-1520669 Tue, 25 Mar 2014 15:46:49 +0000 Mae 1520669@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Cole: thank you!!!</p> <p>@swurlygurl: So glad to hear this, because this sounds like us too. It isn't that my husband is disinterested (at all) it's just that he's really busy and I haven't felt the need to make sure he independently educates himself too much because I know that mostly what I want from him is to say "you've got it!" when I ask him to do something and hold my hand quietly otherwise. But we do talk a lot about all this stuff and I do think he's probably more knowledgable than a lot of guys about all this stuff since I share with him when I'm reading. I mean he isn't going to be shocked when I go into labor and don't want to head to the hospital right away, or when they pull out the labor pool! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/can-you-recommend-any-good-natural-birthbreastfeeding-resources-for-dad#post-1520538 Tue, 25 Mar 2014 14:58:26 +0000 swurlygurl 1520538@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think it depends on the couple - we didn't do any classes, and DH didn't do any reading. I knew he would trust me and follow my lead on things (ie breastfeeding, labor and birthing choices). I also didn't have any desire for him to be spouting off 'facts' or things I'm 'supposed' to be doing while laboring. I knew that would just piss me off! So, we did what worked for us! Noooo regrets. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/can-you-recommend-any-good-natural-birthbreastfeeding-resources-for-dad#post-1520527 Tue, 25 Mar 2014 14:56:12 +0000 Cole 1520527@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I found these options, I don't know if any are perfect but maybe a few of them put together could fill some gaps in what he needs to know.</p> <p>I like this podcast a lot, they cover a wide range of topics but they aren't just geared to natural birth: <a href="http://www.preggiepals.com/episodes/episode-guide/#" rel="nofollow">http://www.preggiepals.com/episodes/episode-guide/#</a></p> <p>The same producers of Preggie Pals does this breast feeding one: <a href="http://www.theboobgroup.com/episodes/episode-guide/" rel="nofollow">http://www.theboobgroup.com/episodes/episode-guide/</a></p> <p>I haven't listened to these but they have a wide range of topics: <a href="http://www.pregtastic.com/category/episodes/" rel="nofollow">http://www.pregtastic.com/category/episodes/</a></p> <p>Isis has their webinars available to watch or listen to online: <a href="http://www.isisparenting.com/page/onlineclasses" rel="nofollow">http://www.isisparenting.com/page/onlineclasses</a> </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/can-you-recommend-any-good-natural-birthbreastfeeding-resources-for-dad#post-1520522 Tue, 25 Mar 2014 14:54:24 +0000 MrsStormy 1520522@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mae: There are online birth classes you could always check it out? I think for us birth classes were more helpful for DH than me, because I had done the research, but it really did help to prepare him. </p> <p>I don't have any book recs but if I were you I would also really start talking to him about whats to come, what to watch for, how to support you. For me a lot of what we learned went out the window during labor, but DH's preparedness for labor was so much better from knowledge, so maybe just start sharing your knowledge with him? I promise that while you think he wont need to know stuff for labor or breastfeeding, he really does, he is your main support person in both of those endeavors, and they are both HARD so you need that support person to be as prepared as possible. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/can-you-recommend-any-good-natural-birthbreastfeeding-resources-for-dad#post-1520517 Tue, 25 Mar 2014 14:53:18 +0000 Mae 1520517@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Kemma: I feel like if the midwives had handouts they would've given them to me already :) And my friends' opinions on the topic has pretty unanimously been "Meh didn't take classes, didn't need 'em" or "took it, didn't learn anything I didn't already know, tossed my stuff from it." Probably also colors my view of wanting to spend the time/effort/money to take them.. hah </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/can-you-recommend-any-good-natural-birthbreastfeeding-resources-for-dad#post-1520509 Tue, 25 Mar 2014 14:51:23 +0000 Kemma 1520509@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mae: I think it's important for the other parent to have a knowledge and understanding of the labour and delivery process in case you aren't in a position to understand, advocate or provide consent for yourself.</p> <p>Perhaps your midwife could provide you with some resources or you could ask if any of your friends still have the handouts from their classes? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/can-you-recommend-any-good-natural-birthbreastfeeding-resources-for-dad#post-1520488 Tue, 25 Mar 2014 14:48:05 +0000 Mae 1520488@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@septca: That is a great idea! </p> <p>@Cole: Also an awesome idea! He listens to podcasts to/from work all the time. I'll have to see if I can find any that might be helpful, but if you happen to know of any too definitely let me know :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/can-you-recommend-any-good-natural-birthbreastfeeding-resources-for-dad#post-1520482 Tue, 25 Mar 2014 14:46:44 +0000 Mrs. Oatmeal 1520482@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My DH took classes with me (8 weeks taught by our doula), and honestly, while he enjoyed them, he's not really a sit-and-listen type guy (or a read-and-learn guy). For him, he learned best by talking things over with me. I did research, took notes in class, etc., and then we talked about things he could do to support me, what to expect, what birth might be like, etc.<br /> He also came to a midwife appt with me, and the midwife sort of talked him through similar things. I don't think there are too many men who would sit down and read Ina May...even though its wonderfully helpful! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/can-you-recommend-any-good-natural-birthbreastfeeding-resources-for-dad#post-1520479 Tue, 25 Mar 2014 14:46:23 +0000 spaniellove 1520479@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mae: I've found that there are providers other than the hospital who will do the class. Doulas will often come to your home and do a 1-day class with you guys as a couple, or a natural parenting-type store (like a cloth diapering boutique?) often has a short evening class, or like a PP mentioned sometimes you can find even a meditation/yoga oriented class at a yoga studio. My area is totally not a great place for holistic stuff but there are some offerings coming up over the next few months so you might be able to find something very short that fits into your schedule. We weren't able to go to our childbirth class so I was able to convince the hospital to let me do their online class - maybe you can find something like that? At the very least I think there are online classes not through hospitals. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/can-you-recommend-any-good-natural-birthbreastfeeding-resources-for-dad#post-1520456 Tue, 25 Mar 2014 14:41:43 +0000 Cole 1520456@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Could you find some podcasts that might reinforce the ideas you want him to learn? My husband listens to podcasts while he gets ready for work in the morning (granted they are sports related) but it is a great way to squeeze in lots of information when time is of the essence. If it would be helpful I will see what I can find. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/can-you-recommend-any-good-natural-birthbreastfeeding-resources-for-dad#post-1520452 Tue, 25 Mar 2014 14:41:10 +0000 septca 1520452@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mae: Yep. It is basically set up by stage of labor and then into 3 categories: what is happening, what I might be feeling, and what DH/doula can do to help. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/can-you-recommend-any-good-natural-birthbreastfeeding-resources-for-dad#post-1520342 Tue, 25 Mar 2014 14:09:15 +0000 rattles 1520342@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>If you're not interested in classes, this might not work for you, but DH came with me to a La Leche Leage meeting. My local chapter does one meeting a quarter to which spouses/partners are invited to come and learn about support, ask questions, etc. It was helpful for expectation setting and ideas of how to be supportive. Other than that, like everyone else, the hospital classes made a big difference for DH in less time than reading would have taken. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/can-you-recommend-any-good-natural-birthbreastfeeding-resources-for-dad#post-1520315 Tue, 25 Mar 2014 14:00:06 +0000 Mae 1520315@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@septca: What types of stuff did you put on there? Like stages of labor and birthing positions and stuff? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/can-you-recommend-any-good-natural-birthbreastfeeding-resources-for-dad#post-1520309 Tue, 25 Mar 2014 13:58:39 +0000 septca 1520309@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mae: Because we were in a similar situation, I made a chart for DH and our doula that covered everything I had learned through my reading. It was like a cheat sheet for DH. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/can-you-recommend-any-good-natural-birthbreastfeeding-resources-for-dad#post-1520223 Tue, 25 Mar 2014 13:38:01 +0000 Mae 1520223@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Re: classes- it just isn't going to happen. </p> <p>There is only 1 open breastfeeding class prior to my due date and it is a night my husband is in school anyways (hate that our hospital mostly only does classes weeknights!). </p> <p>There is only 1 open childbirth class prior to my due date and it is 7 hours split between friday night/saturday the weekend I'm due. Not only will it be possibly moot at that point, I can't think of anything I'd rather do less at 40 weeks pregnant than sit in a plastic chair for 7 hours. I can't even do that now for 2 hours without a lot of pain. </p> <p>And I guess I just don't understand why it is that important that HE knows stuff as long as I know it and he's of the personality type to trust my opinion implicitly when it comes to this stuff. Plus the midwife stays with us through the whole birth. So if she says "DH, do this" he will do it. He's very agreeable :) </p> <p>@septca: I'll look into that book, thank you!!! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/can-you-recommend-any-good-natural-birthbreastfeeding-resources-for-dad#post-1520179 Tue, 25 Mar 2014 13:26:58 +0000 septca 1520179@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>(1) Get him a copy of "The Birth Partner" and flag the chapters you want him to read. It's a big book, but it has lots of pictures and is written in short sections, so getting him to read certain parts shouldn't be a heavy lift.</p> <p>(2) If you can find a short, 3-4 hour weekend class, I would absolutely recommend that. My husband and I only took one childbirth class - a 3-hour Sunday afternoon seminar offered through my yoga studio called "using yoga to prepare for childbirth." It was great and DH really enjoyed it. Not only did we meet other couples who were expecting, but the teacher took everyone through the basics of labor and delivery and did a lot of massage demonstration. The massage techniques were incredibly helpful during labor. It cost about $100, but was really worth it.</p> <p>DH didn't do any prep for BFing and luckily we had an easy go of it. I am not sure what he really could have done to help me - just supporting the fact that I wanted to BF and do everything I could to succeed was enough. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/can-you-recommend-any-good-natural-birthbreastfeeding-resources-for-dad#post-1520143 Tue, 25 Mar 2014 13:16:56 +0000 Mae 1520143@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@AmandaB8: why would you have given birth at home? did you not realize you were in labor and he did? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/can-you-recommend-any-good-natural-birthbreastfeeding-resources-for-dad#post-1520131 Tue, 25 Mar 2014 13:14:22 +0000 AmandaB8 1520131@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm gonna second Lawbee11...I probably would have ended up giving birth at home if DH hadn't gone to those classes with me. He's also the one who pushed me to see an LC when I was having problems. </p> <p>A lot of times you can find just a single, 3 hour class that covers everything. Ours was 1 hour 1 time week for 3 weeks. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/can-you-recommend-any-good-natural-birthbreastfeeding-resources-for-dad#post-1520106 Tue, 25 Mar 2014 13:08:48 +0000 lawbee11 1520106@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>This probably isn't what you want to hear, but going with DH to the childbirth and breastfeeding classes is the best thing we did for this. Months later and he still says, "Remember when the childbirth instructor said..." </p> <p>I did a ton of research beforehand, too, and I still went to the classes and got a lot out of them. I just feel like you can't be too prepared for childbirth or breastfeeding. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/can-you-recommend-any-good-natural-birthbreastfeeding-resources-for-dad#post-1520087 Tue, 25 Mar 2014 13:04:21 +0000 Mae 1520087@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>So I had my 34 week appointment today and my midwife was on me a bit about the fact that I am not planning to take a childbirth or breastfeeding class. I explained that I didn't really feel like it was necessary because I've done SO much in the way of researching myself, reading the books, talking to friends, researching online, etc. She seemed convinced (enough) that I was prepared but said she worries about dads who don't go to the classes because they generally DON'T do the research themselves and can be a hinderance to the process (of either med free birth or breastfeeding) if they don't understand what is going on. </p> <p>She *strongly* suggested I start making my husband "read the books" to get himself prepared. </p> <p>The thing is… he honestly doesn't have time. He works full time and is also going to school at night (and this semester is really kicking his ass homework wise). Plus he is not a natural "reader" and has a really hard time reading long boring stuff. If I had a hard time getting through my Natural Birth (Ina May's) and Breastfeeding books, he has 0 chance. I don't feel that worried about him because we talk a LOT about all of this stuff and I think I've educated him pretty well, and he has watched The Business of Being Born with me. He's also super supportive of my med-free and breastfeeding goals and is the personality type to support me in whatever I want/tell him without pushing his opinions on me. </p> <p>But still. It will make me feel better at our next appointment if I can tell the midwife he read SOMETHING. So can anyone recommend any good (and concise!!) resources for dads? I'm not looking for a 300 page guidebook here, maybe just something geared towards guys to make sure they've gotten the most important info? </p>