https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Thu, 16 Apr 2026 02:00:12 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/changing-relationship-with-the-grandparents#post-2630848 Mon, 03 Oct 2016 10:02:34 +0000 snowjewelz 2630848@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Not so much with my dad, but absolutely brought me so much closer with my mom, especially since she helps take care of DD! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/changing-relationship-with-the-grandparents#post-2630841 Mon, 03 Oct 2016 09:56:40 +0000 2PeasinaPod 2630841@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>It has brought me much closer to my in-laws. My FIL watches my oldest 1 day/week. It started as a baby, and we will continue it until he goes to school FT since they both love it so much. We might switch the day to my youngest so they form a bond as well. My MIL loves being a grandmother, and it shows in absolutely everything she does. We're very lucky to have her.</p> <p>It had brought me closer to my dad initially...he also watched our oldest for a day or two, but it drove a huge wedge between my mom and me. She has boundary issues and I let her emotionally abuse me until I was pregnant with our second. She pulled one more stunt and I lost it. Our relationship is extremely strained now, and I have set boundaries. It's been working so far, but the only reason I have a relationship with my mother is because I don't want to keep my kids from knowing her. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/changing-relationship-with-the-grandparents#post-2630723 Mon, 03 Oct 2016 06:39:00 +0000 looch 2630723@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My mom and I led totally different lives, it was difficult to relate to one another (she married my dad when she was in her early 20s, I went to college, lived in the city with roommates) . She often said she didn't understand me.</p> <p>Then my son was born and now we had something in common (having children) and the relationship expanded. I was always close to my dad. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/changing-relationship-with-the-grandparents#post-2630687 Sun, 02 Oct 2016 21:03:58 +0000 nana87 2630687@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Closer with my dad I think, though I've always been close to him. Like other people mentioned, I don't have time/energy to talk on the phone with my mom anymore, so we talk less. I also have less patience for her using me as a sounding board for her own issues or to vent about other family members. She might not notice that, but I'm more aware of it now and roll my eyes more when we're on the phone, lol</p> <p>I have a lot less patience as well for mil's dramatics also. But we do have more to talk about now I guess </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/changing-relationship-with-the-grandparents#post-2630678 Sun, 02 Oct 2016 20:38:45 +0000 Mrs. Cookie 2630678@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm closer to both my parents and my in-laws after having kids! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/changing-relationship-with-the-grandparents#post-2630677 Sun, 02 Oct 2016 20:37:09 +0000 catlady 2630677@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>With my dad, things briefly got worse after I lost my first pregnancy (my mom had passed a couple years before and I think it was too much for him), but since LO arrived 3 years ago, I think our relationship has gotten better. We've had our issues but overall, he is a great grandparent and I'm really glad about that.</p> <p>I already loved MIL but she is an awesome grandparent so I feel even closer to her since having LO. She was the only one I really trusted with LO as a baby.</p> <p>We had virtually no relationship with FIL (divorced from MIL) pre-kids, but since LO was born, he has wanted to be part of our lives more. I've seen him more over the past 6 months than I think I did in the first 6 years of my relationship with DH. I still feel a little weird around him, but it's getting better and I'm glad LO will have a relationship with him growing up. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/changing-relationship-with-the-grandparents#post-2630640 Sun, 02 Oct 2016 18:53:18 +0000 Foodnerd81 2630640@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>With my parents- probably less close with my mom, only because I don't have as much time to call her and talk. We used to talk on the phone a lot more but now I'm just too tired by the time the kids are in bed. But I also appreciate her as a mom that much more. Closer to my dad because he works from home now and it's flexible, so we can FaceTime with the kids and he really loves it. He's a little awkward with his kids but can be great with the grandkids. </p> <p>Dh's parents- about the same with his mom, though she rubs me the wrong way more often since having kids (I think I'm more sensitive and irritable, plus she's made some comments that do really annoy me) but mostly fine. </p> <p>DH's dad no change- he's not great at communicating and is not involved much but is fine when he's around. Actually- he is very good with the toddler when he is here but that's very rare. </p> <p>All parents live pretty far away. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/changing-relationship-with-the-grandparents#post-2630623 Sun, 02 Oct 2016 15:57:39 +0000 Coffee-lover 2630623@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>It made me much closer to my mom, but i grew way more distant with my dad. Some of the shit he has pulled just makes me really not want to talk to him at all. There has been no change with the in laws, we still only talk a couple times a year. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/changing-relationship-with-the-grandparents#post-2630377 Sat, 01 Oct 2016 08:49:56 +0000 Corduroy 2630377@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Our relationships have suffered a little bit. My parents and in laws are great but far away. Now that we have two kids our place and routines seem so cramped when they're here. It just puts me and DH on the edge with our in laws. I hope this passes soon because it's added a lot of stress for us and our parents. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/changing-relationship-with-the-grandparents#post-2630359 Sat, 01 Oct 2016 07:21:56 +0000 Astro Bee 2630359@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>It's brought me much closer to my mom, but hasn't changed much my closeness with my dad - we were always really close - although I love seeing how great he is with my son. With the in-laws, it has made me feel less close and respectful of them. They've made choices I don't agree with or want to expose my children to. These things didn't bother me before getting pregnant. They do love my son though, but just aren't as involved as my parents, even though they live much much closer. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/changing-relationship-with-the-grandparents#post-2629455 Thu, 29 Sep 2016 17:29:19 +0000 Boogs 2629455@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I feel like I communicate more with my inlaws. I appreciate how much they love my kids. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/changing-relationship-with-the-grandparents#post-2629446 Thu, 29 Sep 2016 17:19:28 +0000 DesertDreams88 2629446@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>How has having children changed your relationship with your parents or in-laws?</p> <p>For me, the whole process (TTC up through now) has brought me closer to my mom but not changed anything with my dad. For my in-laws, it is bringing us closer but also bringing up challenges, since they take care of LO during the day. I think/hope we're working through it and we will become a tight-knit "family" of "5" (gparents + us + LO.) </p>