https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Fri, 08 May 2026 10:35:18 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/chastised-for-using-asap-at-work-thoughts#post-2908865 Thu, 23 Jan 2020 14:30:48 +0000 MaryM 2908865@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I don't like "ASAP" because 1. I don't like acronyms in a professional setting, and 2. I feel like it gives the impression that it's fine for the other party to set their own deadline. </p> <p>"I need this as soon as possible" leaves the door open (in my mind) for them to say "I will get this to you in three weeks" (even if you need it sooner). </p> <p>I've found it best to be honest about deadlines and if they've passed, say something to the effect of "The deadline has passed so we can't do X as promised. But if you can get me something by [new deadline] I'll see what we're still able to manage."</p> <p>In the end, I think the real problem is your boss saying "Do X or we cut funding" and then not following through. If that happens a lot and the consequences aren't held up, why would anyone feel compelled to meet fake deadlines (if it was a real deadline, real consequences would happen) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/chastised-for-using-asap-at-work-thoughts#post-2908863 Thu, 23 Jan 2020 14:17:03 +0000 MrsSCB 2908863@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Wait, so your boss issues an actual threat -- "We need this or we'll cut your funding" -- and you get chewed out for saying "ASAP"? That's absurd. I do personally tend to say "as soon as possible" rather than abbreviating, but I don't even think that matters given how aggressive your boss' own comment was. Wtf. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/chastised-for-using-asap-at-work-thoughts#post-2908808 Wed, 22 Jan 2020 21:50:36 +0000 MamaG 2908808@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>To me it depends on your relationship with the recipient. My boss might have a closer working relationship and be more casual in a communication but I might feel like I can as I don’t have that same level of comfort. As a result my boss and I often have very different tone in emails. I also don’t like ASAP and choose to spell it out or use other words. </p> <p>I also work in planning and reporting and work hard to develop partnerships across our organization. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/chastised-for-using-asap-at-work-thoughts#post-2908735 Tue, 21 Jan 2020 19:53:41 +0000 Cait1 2908735@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@gotkimchi: @Anagram: @DesertDreams88: @erinbaderin: @winter_wonder: @MoonMoon: @SweetCaroline: @BadgerMom: @JCCovi: @skinnycow: @LCTBQE: @crazydoglady: @josina: @Mrs. Carrot: @graceandjoy: @SugarplumsMom: @Bluemasonjar: Thanks everyone for weighing in!!</p> <p>Today the VP sent me a very nice, apologetic email with a commitment to provide the info next week. 🤷‍♀️ So, at least he doesn’t seem too concerned... Your replies all made me feel much better, so thank you! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/chastised-for-using-asap-at-work-thoughts#post-2908715 Tue, 21 Jan 2020 13:05:29 +0000 Bluemasonjar 2908715@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Given the prior emails from your boss that set the tone I don't think the use ASAP was uncalled for at all in this situation.</p> <p>That said, I have been told in previous positions not to use "ASAP" and either spell it out or use alternate wording. I try to avoid it but don't think of it as unprofessional personally. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/chastised-for-using-asap-at-work-thoughts#post-2908714 Tue, 21 Jan 2020 12:46:34 +0000 SugarplumsMom 2908714@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Hearing this pisses me off! Your boss sounds really sexist to me. I bet he can't even explain the difference between your "tone" and his. Annoying af! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/chastised-for-using-asap-at-work-thoughts#post-2908712 Tue, 21 Jan 2020 11:45:28 +0000 graceandjoy 2908712@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I don't see any issues. Your boss is the issue; first he is pretty much saying do whatever it takes to get the info, and now suddenly you're unprofessional? Maybe he got chewed out by that VP and taking it out on you? I'm sorry either way! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/chastised-for-using-asap-at-work-thoughts#post-2908709 Tue, 21 Jan 2020 10:48:11 +0000 Mrs. Carrot 2908709@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Your boss says he's going to cut IT's funding but chastises you for using ASAP? Yeah, that's some BS. It's a perfectly fine term. It can sound aggressive, sure, but no more so than your boss's approach and clearly the guy is past deadline so his bristling at this is uncalled for. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/chastised-for-using-asap-at-work-thoughts#post-2908707 Tue, 21 Jan 2020 10:25:37 +0000 josina 2908707@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I don't work in a formal environment at all... but ASAP wouldn't bother me to use or to receive... I don't think you said anything wrong. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/chastised-for-using-asap-at-work-thoughts#post-2908706 Tue, 21 Jan 2020 10:16:49 +0000 crazydoglady 2908706@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm not fond of "ASAP," but I also don't think it warrants chastisement. I'm also wondering how your boss found out since the email wasn't directed to him but the VP (unless you cc'd your boss.) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/chastised-for-using-asap-at-work-thoughts#post-2908705 Tue, 21 Jan 2020 09:17:31 +0000 LCTBQE 2908705@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I have frequently said "as soon as possible" instead of ASAP. It's just a diction preference but I do think it sounds less snippy. In this case I probably would have phrased it, "Hi VP, just a reminder we need this info as soon as possible, please let me know when we can expect it, thank you." </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/chastised-for-using-asap-at-work-thoughts#post-2908703 Tue, 21 Jan 2020 08:54:02 +0000 skinnycow 2908703@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I see no problem with ASAP and would never think it was too aggressive. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/chastised-for-using-asap-at-work-thoughts#post-2908699 Mon, 20 Jan 2020 22:50:29 +0000 JCCovi 2908699@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>In this scenario, I would definitely have used ASAP. The only time I don’t use it is if it’s my first request, I don’t want to come off as ‘’aggressive’’ when the time crunch is on me and not them. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/chastised-for-using-asap-at-work-thoughts#post-2908697 Mon, 20 Jan 2020 21:31:17 +0000 BadgerMom 2908697@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think your email was fine especially considering the previous emails. Maybe I’m looking too much into it but my first thought is that maybe the VP IT was complaining to someone higher up about the tone in the previous emails by your boss and your boss got his hand slapped which then caused him to change is tune with you. But obviously that’s a lot of speculation. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/chastised-for-using-asap-at-work-thoughts#post-2908696 Mon, 20 Jan 2020 21:15:56 +0000 SweetCaroline 2908696@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>So, I am in a similar role and budget season, especially the crunch time at the end is no joke and everyone knows tough decisions will need to be turned around quickly. ASAP is totally called for. That being said, I would not have used "ASAP" simply due to my personal style, but I would not blink an eye if one of my direct reports used this in an email. Did you ask your boss to specifically model how he wanted you to write the email? How irritating. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/chastised-for-using-asap-at-work-thoughts#post-2908695 Mon, 20 Jan 2020 20:52:45 +0000 MoonMoon 2908695@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Never considered ASAP problematic or unprofessional before! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/chastised-for-using-asap-at-work-thoughts#post-2908694 Mon, 20 Jan 2020 20:44:37 +0000 winter_wonder 2908694@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Cait1: I think ASAP is completely fine. I've never thought twice about using it.</p> <p>@desertdreams88: spot on! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/chastised-for-using-asap-at-work-thoughts#post-2908691 Mon, 20 Jan 2020 19:47:47 +0000 gotkimchi 2908691@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@DesertDreams88: #truth </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/chastised-for-using-asap-at-work-thoughts#post-2908688 Mon, 20 Jan 2020 19:40:28 +0000 erinbaderin 2908688@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think I probably wouldn’t have said ASAP - I likely would have said something along the lines of “the deadline was yesterday, when can we expect to receive the information?” That being said, I don’t see anything /wrong/ with ASAP. It’s not unprofessional! But also the part about understanding that he’s busy and important sounds like you weren’t supposed to follow up at all? </p> <p>Basically I think your boss is being a jerk. I agree with @gotkimchi: - ask what wording he would have preferred. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/chastised-for-using-asap-at-work-thoughts#post-2908687 Mon, 20 Jan 2020 19:38:00 +0000 DesertDreams88 2908687@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think over all there's lot of things that men say that women then get chastised for saying. Such old double-standards. </p> [attach=5393/20/q4flrc.600x600.EGIGddjWsAAewnT.jpg] https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/chastised-for-using-asap-at-work-thoughts#post-2908686 Mon, 20 Jan 2020 19:37:50 +0000 Anagram 2908686@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Sounds sexist to me. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/chastised-for-using-asap-at-work-thoughts#post-2908685 Mon, 20 Jan 2020 19:17:31 +0000 gotkimchi 2908685@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Yah I think ASAP is fine. I would ask your boss what would you have had me say? It sounds like you got the message across so idk what he wanted </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/chastised-for-using-asap-at-work-thoughts#post-2908684 Mon, 20 Jan 2020 19:13:35 +0000 Cait1 2908684@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>So, this is kind of a weird question for a parenting forum but I know a lot of you guys WOH so hoping you’ll humor me :silly: </p> <p>I’m financial reporting supervisor at a large national company. We are in the midst of our budget season right now and are working with our executive team to coordinate budget cuts - which entails lots of emails, and deadlines, and meetings, etc. </p> <p>One of the people we need to collect this information from is our VP of IT. My boss asked me to prioritize getting this info and said we need it by mid month at the latest.. He sent an email himself to the VP and said essentially we need you to get back to us with this quickly and if you do not we will cut your funding - which is honestly a more aggressive tone than I was planning to take myself. That said, I reiterated the message in the weeks leading up to the deadline and used the same or very similar language in my emails. </p> <p>The deadline passed last Thursday. I sent an email on Friday saying “Hi VP, just a reminder that we need this info ASAP. When do you think you’ll have it?” I figured, the deadline has passed so obviously that timeframe didn’t work for him, the next appropriate thing to do would be to ask when he CAN get it to us. </p> <p>Well, my boss chewed me out today for using the phrase “ASAP” and for asking when we’ll get the info. Said it was unprofessional and to be understanding that the VP is very busy and important.</p> <p>I feel horrible and I’m embarrassed for saying something stupid. I truly didn’t mean anything snarky or bitchy and really just meant to convey “hey, we haven’t heard back from you yet and we need this info fast, when can we expect it?” I don’t think the VP cared at all, this seems to be just my boss’ personal take.</p> <p>What do you ladies think - is “ASAP” rude or unprofessional in a work setting? I’m a little annoyed because he was using similar language in his emails. The fact that it’s fine for him but not me makes me wonder if it’s kind of an old school /sexist mentality about how women should speak? Sorry for the rambling post. </p>