https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Mon, 11 May 2026 07:04:10 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/choosing-career-over-baby-guilt#post-2107579 Fri, 13 Mar 2015 14:03:18 +0000 Cherrybee 2107579@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@LibbyLou: I see. So more like regret then, rather than guilt? Don't worry, the right time will come along.... You can use this "up in the air" period as a catalyst for getting a new, family friendly position. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/choosing-career-over-baby-guilt#post-2107553 Fri, 13 Mar 2015 13:45:45 +0000 blackbird 2107553@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I don't think you're choosing your career over your potential children if your job is kind of a mess right now! Stability is an important thing, especially mentally. I would be freaking out an awful lot of my job was up in the air while I was pregnant. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/choosing-career-over-baby-guilt#post-2107552 Fri, 13 Mar 2015 13:44:40 +0000 LibbyLou 2107552@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@macintosh: thank you for the thoughtful answer! That is my current plan: I have feelers out to my network and still ttc.<br /> @cherrybee good question. Maybe it's panic more than guilt? Not getting younger, not seeing a "perfect time" so I feel like I could have gotten pregnant early in our marriage. I could do my job with kids, just the maternity leave/any FMLA time I would need off for complications is the trouble. Perhaps perceived trouble too. </p> <p>@mrsjacks yes it will definitely be a more family friendly company when I move on. I have already asked women in my field who they have heard are less likely to lose their crap for pregnancy! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/choosing-career-over-baby-guilt#post-2107523 Fri, 13 Mar 2015 13:29:07 +0000 Mrs. Jacks 2107523@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Waiting seems like a very viable option in your case. Perhaps the next career move will be to a more family friendly position? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/choosing-career-over-baby-guilt#post-2107520 Fri, 13 Mar 2015 13:26:53 +0000 Cherrybee 2107520@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@LibbyLou: Can I ask, why is it you feel *guilty* for choosing to wait? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/choosing-career-over-baby-guilt#post-2107331 Fri, 13 Mar 2015 11:05:50 +0000 macintosh 2107331@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@LibbyLou: I know the feeling. I've been in positions in the past that would absolutely not be friendly to maternity leave or the time constraints of parenthood.</p> <p>I feel like there's never a perfect time to get pregnant. When I got pregnant, my job situation was uncertain, with the contract I was working on potentially not being renewed next year (I'm a consultant). I went for it anyway, because I'm not getting any younger and at least I currently have health insurance,</p> <p>I was nervous to tell my boss because my maternity leave actually coincides with our busy season. Fortunately, things worked out for the best with me actually being promoted so I could work on multiple projects and oversee the contract I had been working on. Now I've made myself indispensable to my boss, and he's willing to let me do the majority of my work from home in the future.</p> <p>That said, I know sales is a tough, competitive field. I personally hated being in sales, but if you're good your skills should be highly transferable. Could you start looking now and continue TTC? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/choosing-career-over-baby-guilt#post-2107326 Fri, 13 Mar 2015 11:02:37 +0000 Pirouette 2107326@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>In all honesty, these fears/guilt didn't go away for me until i got pregnant and it became real. and then all of the sudden, my focus shifted and I became less concerned about it all. That's not to say I cared less about my career, which is extremely important to me, it's just that I knew having my LO was the best thing ever and it gave me the solace to think that everything would work out, even if my career suffered for a short while.</p> <p>In my personal experience, there was never going to be a perfect time career wise for me to have a baby. But in my case, it was way more important that I prove myself after LO was born than that i time it right. It's tough not knowing what your job prospects might look like, and it sounds like a rough field for being pregnant, but you can make it work! :heart: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/choosing-career-over-baby-guilt#post-2107308 Fri, 13 Mar 2015 10:44:36 +0000 LibbyLou 2107308@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Needing a little support right now! </p> <p>In the past, I chose my career over children and now I feel like I am in a place work-wise to finally start a family. However, my job is completely unstable right now- and the chances of me getting a new job while KU is slim. I am feeling so guilty for choosing to wait.<br /> Added on top that we have been NTNP for a year and I'm feeling disheartened. Now due to my work, we are talking of being more careful- that is breaking my heart.<br /> Has anyone been in this position? How do you know when your career can continue withstand a pregnancy? </p> <p>ETA: I'm in sales, taking a quarter off even for pregnancy is frowned upon. I know women who returned from Maternity leave to be "restructured" aka fired. Not legal I know but it sadly/frustratingly happens. Which is why if I was visibly pregnant I would most likely not be able to get a new job. </p>