https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Mon, 13 Apr 2026 01:22:34 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/close-friends/page/2#post-2617346 Wed, 07 Sep 2016 15:15:06 +0000 bubblegum 2617346@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Sunshine: I could have honestly written this post. You're not alone </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/close-friends/page/2#post-2613995 Wed, 31 Aug 2016 11:28:55 +0000 MrsKoala 2613995@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I feel pretty lucky in that I have close friends that all live in the same area as me and had kids around the same time. Now we try to get our kids together as often as we can and we make time to hang out alone as adults as well. I'm also open to making more friends but I'm introverted so it takes me a while to get beyond acquaintance status with people. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/close-friends/page/2#post-2613980 Wed, 31 Aug 2016 11:20:11 +0000 Boogs 2613980@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Two that are close. One no longer lives in the area. I'm an introvert, so I'm not great about maintaining friendships and I prefer having a smaller group of people I trust. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/close-friends/page/2#post-2612946 Mon, 29 Aug 2016 17:38:12 +0000 GoGoSnoGirl 2612946@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I have various "types" of friends including: geographically close but not as strongly bonded friends &amp; many geographically distant but strong bond friends. It is weighing on me the close friends aren't closer &amp; the near ones aren't quite as dear. :bummed: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/close-friends/page/2#post-2612917 Mon, 29 Aug 2016 16:51:09 +0000 Mrs. Sunshine 2612917@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@MaryM: that makes sense! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/close-friends#post-2612915 Mon, 29 Aug 2016 16:49:17 +0000 MaryM 2612915@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Sunshine: Maybe that's why I prefer email than text?</p> <p>It isn't as immediate a source of gratification, but I feel like we're more likely to answer emails when we're sitting at a computer (because it's easier) and have longer more drawn out conversations. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/close-friends#post-2612911 Mon, 29 Aug 2016 16:46:34 +0000 Mrs. Sunshine 2612911@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@MaryM: I do that with the previously mentioned friend (she has one year old and is a nurse). She basically updates me on their latest illness and then that's it lol which is fine, I genuinely care about how her entire family is doing on every level, it just rarely leads to messages that are more than 3 texts long and I sometimes just wish there was more time to text/things to say, if that makes sense. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/close-friends#post-2612902 Mon, 29 Aug 2016 16:31:57 +0000 MaryM 2612902@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Sunshine: Usually when I email a friend it's because I've thought about putting something on social media and then thought "who would REALLY care about this?" and then sent it to that friend. </p> <p>I have two friends that I email with regularly. A lot of times it's just sort of "what's up in your life/how much does work suck/what are you up to" type things. But these are also long distance friends that I don't get to see regularly, so it's the only way we keep up. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/close-friends#post-2612807 Mon, 29 Aug 2016 14:34:31 +0000 MoonMoon 2612807@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Sunshine: with my friends it depends. We might send each other funny links or something funny that happened at work or with the kids. If their kids are older, I might ask for advice. Sometimes we vent. Sometimes we talk about food or TV shows. Sometimes it's fun if you're reading the same books, like the same blogs, or watch the same TV shows at the same time because you can talk about that. Sometimes I just text and say "how's your Monday going?" or check in along those lines. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/close-friends#post-2612798 Mon, 29 Aug 2016 14:17:38 +0000 Truth Bombs 2612798@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Sunshine: My group texts with my friends are serious stream of consciousness. Cute stuff the kids did, funny things or annoying things our husbands said, venting about work, politics, current events, etc. You name it, we talk about it. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/close-friends#post-2612781 Mon, 29 Aug 2016 13:59:14 +0000 LulaBee 2612781@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Sunshine: well, they're both pregnant so checking on that. Checking on things happening in our lives. Commiserating about things. Just... Being friendly I guess? I'll ignore group texts if I'm busy but we basically text all day. We may be odd, though. I don't worry about bothering them, I worry if I don't hear from them! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/close-friends#post-2612775 Mon, 29 Aug 2016 13:46:48 +0000 Mrs. Sunshine 2612775@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@LulaBee: so maybe this is a strange question but what do y'all say when you check in with each other? That's where I struggle is the check in. Like I feel like I'm bothering her (her being my best friend since 3rd grade whom I adore but we are struggling on both sides with keeping up with each other). I just don't know what to say sometimes! Ha! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/close-friends#post-2612768 Mon, 29 Aug 2016 13:44:23 +0000 LulaBee 2612768@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I've got really 3 good friends. One of whom I met when our daughters were 8 months old in music class, one who I used to work with, also has child same age and attended same music class. We text daily, see each other about once a week usually with kids (music class). And my BFF just moved back to town last year, we text daily and see each other regularly. Sometimes we have girls night where all of the above come.</p> <p>I feel very lucky to have my tribe. I try to make our relationships a priority, even just checking in daily. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/close-friends#post-2612747 Mon, 29 Aug 2016 13:20:34 +0000 LuLu Mom 2612747@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm extremely lucky to have a great core group of friends. We text/email daily and get together once a month (might not be all 5 of us at once, but we try as a couple live 1-3 hours away.) For me, my friends are my sanity and that is so needed. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/close-friends#post-2612713 Mon, 29 Aug 2016 12:42:46 +0000 erinbaderin 2612713@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Sunshine: I feel like this with a lot of my friends, that I put in all the effort and it isn't reciprocated. With several of my friends I feel like if I stopped trying to maintain the relationship we'd stop being friends. I've come to terms with that, though, because I still want to be friends with them so I figure if I'm doing all the reaching out so be it, because we have fun together regardless of who set it up. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/close-friends#post-2612642 Mon, 29 Aug 2016 11:32:49 +0000 Mrs. Pickles 2612642@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm the only one of my close friends with children so that presents it's own challenges..<br /> We also live on a farm so that suffers some logistical hurdles, but I try to keep meeting people and initiate conversations as much as possible. I'm pretty discouraged right now as people keep blowing me off but it's part of the life stage I suppose. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/close-friends#post-2612551 Mon, 29 Aug 2016 10:10:20 +0000 snowjewelz 2612551@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Yes but I don't see most of them! My best friend, she lives/works totally opposite of where I am, is single, no kids, so our schedules/lives cannot be more different. But we text pretty much everyday and that has worked for our friendship! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/close-friends#post-2612546 Mon, 29 Aug 2016 10:05:17 +0000 Mama Bird 2612546@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm sorry you're all struggling with this. I guess it comes with growing and changing sometimes, but it's still sad. I've never needed my friends more, but I've lost my last two close friends the year my second kid was born. DH struggles too. He's much better about keeping in touch with people, but his closest friends live so far away. Maybe things will change and some of these people will come back into our lives years later. I hope so. After all, I think when people get older and aren't so consumed with raising kids, they have more time and more need for friends. Good luck to everyone dealing with this, I hope things look better in time. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/close-friends#post-2612536 Mon, 29 Aug 2016 09:57:16 +0000 periwinklebee 2612536@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>This pretty much describes me. I had a close knit group of friends from college, but they all live on the opposite side of the country now. I do make an effort to see them as much as possible, and when I see them it's great, but I hardly ever see them. None of us are good at staying in touch via email or Skype. My family also lives far away. </p> <p>I have tried to put myself out there, but obviously haven't done a good enough job. The city we live in is pretty transient, so it can be sad to see new friend after friend move away. We likely won't be here long-run either. I found that it was actually easier to meet single friends, as they tend to have the most time for friendships and demographically the population where we're at is all pretty young (we haven't made the move to the burbs yet), but then they start talking about their match.com profiles or whatever and I really struggle to relate. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/close-friends#post-2612510 Mon, 29 Aug 2016 09:23:57 +0000 Pumpkin Pie 2612510@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@junebugsmama: Not sure if we have connected before on a different thread, but I'm in the south bay - still a bit far from east bay, eh. </p> <p>I work full time, and am pretty busy, but I still want friends! It has been hard for me to find people that I connect with, not sure if its me or them, but everyone seems nice on the surface, but distant. I'm still trying to put myself out there more (whenever I can). </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/close-friends#post-2612301 Sun, 28 Aug 2016 18:33:25 +0000 Mrs. Sunshine 2612301@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@sandy: I think I'm just too worried of being rejected or something. I don't know. Sometimes I feel like I put in the effort but on the other hand I'm not attempting to set up play dates often or anything. I still have work to do myself. I guess I'm more lamenting the failed efforts to maintain my current/past friendships. I tried really hard with those but I don't feel the effort has been reciprocated. That's life though and I should turn my energy away from pity parties </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/close-friends#post-2612294 Sun, 28 Aug 2016 18:25:43 +0000 sandy 2612294@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Pen: I think you nailed it - the first step is to put yourself out there and make an effort. So glad it's worked out for you :happy: </p> <p>I know every situation is different and it can definitely be harder for some to find and develop new lasting friendships but I think if you put in the time and effort that it usually does pay off. It's not instantaneous or easy - you have to invest in others to develop a meaningful connection. We're all busy and it's hard to stay close to existing friends and it can be hard to make new friends. </p> <p>I know for myself I put myself out there a lot when LO was a baby to build a community of local friends in a similar life stage. My childhood best friends live farther away, have gone back to work, and have kids a lot older so it's hard to see them often. So I made friends with other moms/dads at the park, pool, ballet, play gym, library story time, etc. There are about 8 of us who got together several times a week for play dates when our kids were little and now it's been 2-3 years of friendship and now several of us do family dinners, summer BBQs, vacations, date nights, and a weekend getaway for just moms. It took time and effort for sure but the payoff is a community of friends going through the same parenting struggles and life stage. </p> <p>So many people I know say they're too busy to make new friends but then feel like they are missing out or feel isolated when life slows down. I know it's not always easy but if you take the time and invest in others, I think the payoff is so worth it in the long run </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/close-friends#post-2612278 Sun, 28 Aug 2016 16:19:25 +0000 MoonMoon 2612278@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Sunshine: I understand that feeling of frustration! And it's harder with kids, because I feel like I can only become friends with someone new if our kids get along! </p> <p>I've just started going back to school, so I'm hopeful that that might be an opportunity to find some new friends. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/close-friends#post-2612277 Sun, 28 Aug 2016 16:16:35 +0000 Mrs. Sunshine 2612277@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@MoonMoon: I don't even have people I regularly text with! I go whole days where my only person I talk to is DH and he is usually just asking me if I'm partying all day because apparently it's funny to him lol </p> <p>I just feel really isolated. I feel like I try hard to reach out but I guess not hard enough because I only have surface friendships. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/close-friends#post-2612274 Sun, 28 Aug 2016 16:13:03 +0000 stiletto_mom 2612274@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I have close friends, but no "best friends". Aside from my husband, </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/close-friends#post-2612270 Sun, 28 Aug 2016 15:47:07 +0000 MoonMoon 2612270@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Hugs to everyone who feels lonely, I commiserate! My good friends who I text with, whom I've known a long time, and really feel close to happen to live in hundreds or thousands of miles away, same as my brother and close cousins who I consider friends.</p> <p>We've made some good couple friends where we live, but many of them have moved away (life in academia). One couple we are friends with, who have kids close in age to LO, don't seen to want to hang out much, they're usually doing things with family etc.</p> <p>Sighhhhh. I feel really lonely, and in addition I feel guilty because I feel like I'm depriving my son of an extended support system. :crying: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/close-friends#post-2612262 Sun, 28 Aug 2016 15:21:09 +0000 brownepiano 2612262@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I had close friends in college but they all moved far away and I had kids (and they didn't) so now we don't really communicate and I started over. I used to be close with my brother but the same thing happened. I have some close friends now from church but I often feel like the odd ball because I work PT and they don't. I've learned that I'm terrible at long distance relationships and that I am bad at investing in many people at a time, so I choose one or two relationships and just stick those. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/close-friends#post-2612261 Sun, 28 Aug 2016 15:17:12 +0000 brownepiano 2612261@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Cherrybee: that sounds really tough. I hate it when I get together with my friends and all we do the whole time is mediate playing. I can't have a full conversation or barely even think when my toddler is around. My DH can tune him out but i just can't. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/close-friends#post-2612227 Sun, 28 Aug 2016 12:44:44 +0000 catlady 2612227@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>None nearby enough so that I see them often. I have a large, very close-knit group of friends from college, but the ones that have families live far away and the ones that live sort of nearby are still single and/or don't have kids, which makes it tough to get together too often now that I have a family.</p> <p>I've been trying to make more local mom friends but I've been having a tough time. I had a couple friends from LO's daycare but one already moved away and the other is moving soon. Everyone is jumping ship for the suburbs. Since DH and I will probably move as well in a year or two, I feel like I have less incentive to try hard to make mom friends around here at this point. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/close-friends#post-2612224 Sun, 28 Aug 2016 12:35:38 +0000 Mrs. Pen 2612224@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>It took me awhile and really putting myself out there to find some close friends- not just surface "we hang out at church" type friends.<br /> One of the biggest things was just put myself out there and start attending events or get togethers even if there wasn't anyone I knew. It pushed me out of my comfort zone, and I've met some amazing ladies and started to focus on some of the individual relationships.<br /> Also, going to nursing school helped. I have one really close single mama friend and our kids love to play together even though they're four years apart.<br /> The majority of my closest friends are actually childless, as funny as that sounds. And many of them love and invest in my kid as they do in me. </p> <p>I guess I just don't usually connect with moms in the same way I do other ladies. But I'm fine with that because I do feel content with the number of close friends I have and amount of adult interaction I get. But it hasn't always been this way and took awhile to get here. When I first had my son, I was so isolated and so lonely. But I also never tried to meet people, I didn't push myself to go places or introduce myself to others. I do now, and it's changed things for me. </p>