https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Sun, 10 May 2026 16:22:32 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/cold-feet-on-ttc-2#post-557653 Fri, 08 Feb 2013 23:59:59 +0000 runsyellowlites 557653@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Ree723: I TOTALLY felt like this before ttc for P! G was already 7 so not only was I "adding" another child to the mix I was pretty much a ftm again b/c it had been so long. I'll be honest, I thought multiple times early in my pregnancy that I was CRAZY for TRYING for another and really regretted having deciding to do so. WHY would I go back to not sleeping? G is pretty much self sufficient and I was going back to being completely depended on for E.V.E.R.Y.thing. It was tough for a couple months primarily b/c the lovely early pregnancy symptoms were so prevalent and it affected how I was with G BUT I did get past them and became really happy again about our choice and new venture into being a mom of 2.</p> <p>I also totally understand your fear of baby 2 being a different temperament and how that may affect things. G was such and easy baby and I learned pretty quick with P that ALL BABIES ARE DIFFERENT b/c she was the complete opposite. We had feeding issues, protein intolerances, and she was pretty high needs until around 6 months. What I learned though is that I can love her just as much as G despite her demand and that even though I have to be more proactive in it I can still give G the time he needs. It's been a balancing act BUT it can be done &amp; you keep your sanity.</p> <p>Right now P is just about 10 months and we're in the waiting to try camp. We're still bf'ing so plan to wait until P is a year so if bf'ing is "compromised" we don't risk the time that P needs breastmilk and I'm actually hoping that we can tandem nurse! Figure that will be a great way to let P acclimate to having another sibling, one that it technically moving into her "territory". </p> <p>We may not start ttc right at her 1 year mark but we're definitely coming close to being "ready" &amp; this time I think I'll be more prepared for all the overwhelming feelings that may come with adding another to the mix. It's totally normal to question and worry though, it's a whole new venture! As scary as it may be it's great though! ;) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/cold-feet-on-ttc-2#post-557639 Fri, 08 Feb 2013 23:37:40 +0000 Ree723 557639@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>So many good points made by everyone, and I'm so glad it's completely normal to get cold feet on and off!</p> <p>@PrincessBaby: that has been my biggest fear! I love E so much, I can't possibly imagine loving another child as much as her. And because we've had all this bonding time, just the two of us whilst DH is at work, I worry that I won't have the same bond with #2 as we won't really ever have time just the two of us. E is also such a perfect baby (seriously, she is the easiest infant and we are so lucky), I worry that if the next one isn't as easy, I won't love it as much. I know these are irrational fears but they do creep in when the cold feet start!</p> <p>@sloaneandpuffy: Interesting point, I hadn't thought about that. I just assumed if my period is coming back, then I can get pregnant again. Ha, maybe I need to do a bit more research!</p> <p>@duckduckkristen: What you just described is exactly what I envision my mindset being when the next one is on the way! I'm glad to hear you're feeling better and congrats on the pregnancy!</p> <p>@Thehistoryofus: that is so true, nine months doesn't sound long in theory, but when I think back nine months, we were still a month and a half away from having DD; that seems like so long ago so I know it will be plenty of time to adjust to the idea of a second baby.</p> <p>@lemondrop: that's kind of how I feel - I have moments where I can't wait to have another, then moments where I think no way! It all seems to depend on the day!</p> <p>@Sugar.Biscuit: you're absolutely right - it needs to just be a simple yes or no answer. I am the queen of overanalyzing absolutely everything but when faced with the question of 'do you want a second baby' the answer is yes. Thanks for simplifying it all and good luck to you on TTC your sticky baby!</p> <p>Thank you all for your input, it is greatly appreciated! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/cold-feet-on-ttc-2#post-557560 Fri, 08 Feb 2013 21:58:59 +0000 Weagle 557560@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Whenever I get my period back (9 months and counting...) we will be NTNP, and I definitely have cold feet off and on...sometimes by the hour. And definitely on those days that LO refuses to nap at all. But I know that I absolutely love and adore LO, and I will feel the same about her sibling(s). I realize that the potential chaos scares me, but the good far outweighs the bad. And like pp said, there's a whole pregnancy to prepare and older LOs mature a lot in 9 months! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/cold-feet-on-ttc-2#post-556917 Fri, 08 Feb 2013 14:21:08 +0000 lemondrop 556917@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Yes!!! Big time cold feet, we were going to start trying last fall when he was 9 months, but I chickened out until he was almost a year. I was actually a bit relieved last month when I got a BFN. He hit a rough patch with sleep, so I briefly entertained the thought of only child! This week I'm ready again... </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/cold-feet-on-ttc-2#post-556699 Fri, 08 Feb 2013 12:22:52 +0000 sorrycharlie 556699@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@PrincessBaby: I was terrified of the same thing (not loving another baby!) It actually took until month 3 that I could say "one day..when she has a sibling" and now that she's over 4 months, I totally have newborn fever and imagine her as a big sister one day! not that we'll try any time soon - but, just reassuring you that the feeling gets a little easier I think with time :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/cold-feet-on-ttc-2#post-556678 Fri, 08 Feb 2013 12:11:39 +0000 cyndistar3 556678@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We didn't try for number two until our first was almost 3 and I still got cold feet! I don't think there is a magical age where it just goes away ;) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/cold-feet-on-ttc-2#post-556323 Fri, 08 Feb 2013 10:10:01 +0000 T.H.O.U. 556323@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>The other thing that really helps me is to remember that you typically have 9-10 months before a new LO arrives! If I got a BFP this cycle, I would have until November to get adjusted to the new idea and plan for #2! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/cold-feet-on-ttc-2#post-556288 Fri, 08 Feb 2013 10:00:55 +0000 cascademom 556288@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I have moments where I'm so ready for #2 and other times not so much. We talked about 2-3 years between kids. I turn 33 next week, so I don't want to wait too long as well. Our marriage is getting back on track from the crap we went through in October. I don't think we'll entertain #2 thoughts until LO's first birthday or after our anniversary. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/cold-feet-on-ttc-2#post-556245 Fri, 08 Feb 2013 09:49:22 +0000 PrincessBaby 556245@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I always planned on cranking out our kids close together (I'll turn 33 in July), but now that H is here (2 months old), I really feel like I want to enjoy her. Just her. For a little while. I also like having my body back, shopping for cute clothes, and feeling good about myself.</p> <p>And I get scared about how I will ever love another baby as much as H? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/cold-feet-on-ttc-2#post-556170 Fri, 08 Feb 2013 09:24:02 +0000 littlek 556170@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Ree723: Our LO is 8 months (so we are in a similar situation) and we are going to start trying soon. I'm excited but also nervous. My first pregnancy was good until I had my son unexpectedly at 34 weeks and I'm paranoid I won't make it full term. But then I think about how much more I know this time and how much better I understand my body and that makes me feel like I will be able to go full term. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/cold-feet-on-ttc-2#post-556130 Fri, 08 Feb 2013 09:05:11 +0000 duckduckkristen 556130@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I got pregnant when LO was 7 months old since we wanted our first two close together (honestly I thought it would have taken longer since I had only had AF twice). I was really excited to get pregnant, but then once I was pregnant, exhausted, and sick, I started wishing we had waited a few more months! Now that I'm starting to feel better though I'm excited again. I do think we will wait longer now to TTC for our third, when originally we wanted them really close together. </p> <p>I think having kids this close together has its rough times, but also very happy times! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/cold-feet-on-ttc-2#post-556117 Fri, 08 Feb 2013 08:59:11 +0000 mamimami 556117@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>It's normal to freak but it's also OK to wait a little! I know you're NTNP but think about charting. When I got my period back post partum, charting helped me realize that my luteal phase was taking a few months to lengthen sufficiently to even be able to maintain a pregnancy. We started trying after my baby turned one and now they are 2 years 1 month and almost 4 months old. It's pretty insane at times -- not sure I'd want them any closer together! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/cold-feet-on-ttc-2#post-556068 Fri, 08 Feb 2013 08:22:55 +0000 SAHM0811 556068@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I didn't get cold feet too much because we had waited til we absolutely felt 99.9% ready. For our family, we wanted them "close together", but that wasn't our #1 factor in TTC. Like the pp mentioned, we just asked ourselves if we were ready to add a baby to the mix at that time... Yes or no. It wasn't til DD was almost 2.5 yo that we were both sure the answer was a Yes. We just loved those years with one baby and didn't want to rush into having another. </p> <p>Thankfully I was 28 when I had my first though, so I didn't worry about advanced maternal age, which is defined as 35 I think.</p> <p>But yes, even with a "99.9% ready" mentality, there's always going to be a little part of you that freaks out about it all! And after having #1, maybe even moreso because this time, you know firsthand what it means to go through it all again. But at the same time, it was more exciting because I felt more confident as a mom and I felt that my DD would love a sibling at that point. So cold feet wasn't as bad... still was there though a little! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/cold-feet-on-ttc-2#post-556040 Fri, 08 Feb 2013 07:55:56 +0000 Sugar.Biscuit 556040@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Ree723: I agree with@Thehistoryofus: we are still ttc our sticky baby and all those thoughts flash through my mind all the time. IMO it's natural to question yourself. I was told by our NFP instructor to Ask yourself, "do I want another baby right now?" Answer it with a simple yes or no.<br /> Not yes but or no but, just yes or no &amp; if your partner agrees you have your answer. The point is to not mind f yourself crazy &amp; keep it simple. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/cold-feet-on-ttc-2#post-556029 Fri, 08 Feb 2013 07:46:16 +0000 T.H.O.U. 556029@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Ree723: Yes, that is what I am hoping. That these were the same fears we had before trying for #1, and it has all worked out great. I am hoping the same is true for #2. </p> <p>@artbee: I agree, the ideal spacing is hard and I think plans definitely change after you go through one pregnancy and one newborn stage. We woke up with DD#1 in the middle of the night for the entire first year. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/cold-feet-on-ttc-2#post-556004 Fri, 08 Feb 2013 07:23:45 +0000 heffalump 556004@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We ended up postponing our TTC time for baby #2. I think people have a time set in their heads that they want to space their kids out but they don't actually have a baby before they think about this. It sounds all perfect and easy peasy in your head..... But the baby comes and like you said it's just not so easy. </p> <p>I also have health problems to throw in the mix. I get severe migraines that go crazy during pregnancy, like literally I spend the first 6 months on the couch and I can't lift my head up. So we've been waiting for lo to become a little more independent and to be able to play on her own before I TTC for baby #2. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/cold-feet-on-ttc-2#post-555999 Fri, 08 Feb 2013 07:03:33 +0000 Ree723 555999@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Thehistoryofus: Lol, glad to see the worry/fear/cold feet are just par for the course no matter how old LO #1 is! Sort of like trying for the first one, there are always reasons why the timing isn't perfect but eventually we get to a point where those reasons seem minor in the grand scheme of things...I think! :-) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/cold-feet-on-ttc-2#post-555317 Thu, 07 Feb 2013 20:12:34 +0000 T.H.O.U. 555317@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Yes and my Daughter is 18 months! We are ntnp but the same fears I had with number one are creaping up. Things like never sleeping, never going out, being broke, stress on our marriage etc. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/cold-feet-on-ttc-2#post-555250 Thu, 07 Feb 2013 20:02:32 +0000 Ree723 555250@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>DH and I have always been on the same page that we'd like to have three children and would like to have them somewhat close together. We had decided that when DD turned 6 months, we'd stop preventing and see what happens. Well, DD is 7.5 months now and I am just getting my cycle back, so now the NTNP takes on a whole new meaning.</p> <p>I'm pretty sure I just finished my fertile window and whilst DH and I weren't trying to make a baby specifically, we did get busy during that time. Of course I'm now freaking out, wondering if we did indeed make a baby. I know it's an incredibly long shot, but we've been pregnant twice before (one m/c and DD) and both of those pregnancies came from one BD session the first time we pulled the goalie. I know it's unlikely to happen like that again, but I can't help but wonder.</p> <p>We'd be thrilled if we got pregnant now as we do really want to have kids close together, especially as age isn't really on our side (I'm 33), but now that it is a realistic possibility, I'm questioning whether or not I am ready for this just yet. Most of my reasons for not being ready are pretty dumb (I'm enjoying having my body back, I like my sleep, I like having just one child to worry about) and some not so dumb reasons (I'm still BF'ing DD, I love the individual time I get to spend with DD every day etc). I think it's just a case of cold feet but I'm going to be waiting on tenterhooks for the next two weeks to go by so I can test.</p> <p>Did anyone else get a case of cold feet when trying for #2? How did you work through it? Were your fears unfounded or do you wish you had waited longer between babies? </p>