https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Thu, 09 Jul 2026 02:23:17 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/comment-about-a-pregnant-work-colleagues-capability-im-so-angry#post-1712959 Fri, 20 Jun 2014 15:33:57 +0000 Cole 1712959@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>The way I see it you have an employee who temporarily needs to have access to a restroom frequently and if he was having a bladder issue not related to pregnancy (or anyone else was) there would be accommodations made for them too. Besides, if she was expected to still do the visits it would likely take her longer and then people would complain about that!</p> <p>Good for you for sticking up for your team's needs! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/comment-about-a-pregnant-work-colleagues-capability-im-so-angry#post-1712952 Fri, 20 Jun 2014 15:32:14 +0000 Mrs.Panda 1712952@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think you made the right decision and dear sir is just going to have to suck it up. And I totally subscribe to the fair does not equal same idea!</p> <p>I'm a nurse and I refuse to take patients with certain infections as it can prove dangerous to my baby. Sure, that means someone else is going to have to take them, but I make up for it in other ways (taking another admission instead, doing more tedious work, etc). Luckily it's a female dominated profession so I get a lot of support from my coworkers, both male and female. If anything the men are more accommodating because they have seen the horrors in L&amp;D ;) :silly: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/comment-about-a-pregnant-work-colleagues-capability-im-so-angry#post-1712946 Fri, 20 Jun 2014 15:24:21 +0000 MsLipGloss 1712946@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Cherrybee: knowing how to best allocate your human resources is the mark of a good leader. that also includes making decisions that may not be popular, and making accommodations for your people whether they know they need them or not. As someone who worked incredibly grueling hours while pg--self-imposed of course--I would have been relieved that my boss had made this decision. Barring medical necessity, I never would have asked for anything like this out if fear of appearing incapable instead of *just* pregnant. :heart: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/comment-about-a-pregnant-work-colleagues-capability-im-so-angry#post-1712942 Fri, 20 Jun 2014 15:23:21 +0000 Cherrybee 1712942@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Pen: He belongs to a very strict religious group. :meh: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/comment-about-a-pregnant-work-colleagues-capability-im-so-angry#post-1712939 Fri, 20 Jun 2014 15:22:16 +0000 Cherrybee 1712939@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@yoursilverlining: They haven't been doing home visits for the last year or so as they were SO behind with their work - I'm reintroducing them from July. You raise some very good points, thanks for the reminder! This particular decision was made during a two way conversation with her, honestly!! :happy: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/comment-about-a-pregnant-work-colleagues-capability-im-so-angry#post-1712933 Fri, 20 Jun 2014 15:17:33 +0000 Cherrybee 1712933@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@MsLipGloss: There is a whole section of the company risk assessment dedicated to pumping and storing breast milk!!! She will probably want to do her home visits over the course of four mornings/afternoons so she's back at the office to pump.... but she's having 9 months off so we'll see what she needs when she gets back. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/comment-about-a-pregnant-work-colleagues-capability-im-so-angry#post-1712926 Fri, 20 Jun 2014 15:15:05 +0000 MsLipGloss 1712926@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@brownie: I totally agree. Fair does not mean Same. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/comment-about-a-pregnant-work-colleagues-capability-im-so-angry#post-1712925 Fri, 20 Jun 2014 15:14:54 +0000 yoursilverlining 1712925@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm sure Im' in the minority, but honestly; I can kind of understand his beef (although he sounds like a real gem! Yuck). As a pregnant woman I definitely didn’t want any special treatment. I would have been *pissed* if my boss had thought I needed special treatment and to not do my regular work – work I had been doing while 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7+ months pregnant. I can more understand the safety concern; certainly more than the bathroom access. Presumably the issues have been there throughout her pregnancy (i.e., no access to a bathroom, etc.?) and she’s managed fine. </p> <p>Just my $.02 (not sure what that works out to for you Brits! :silly: ) but I think one of the fastest way to get mommy-tracked is to get pregnancy-tracked too. I do think this also has the potential to cause a real rift between co-workers on a team; but hopefully that doesn’t happen. </p> <p>I think it's good that you stuck to your guns though; sounds like you'll definitely need to do that with this "gentleman" in the future! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/comment-about-a-pregnant-work-colleagues-capability-im-so-angry#post-1712921 Fri, 20 Jun 2014 15:13:29 +0000 Cherrybee 1712921@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@brownie: Thank you. :heart: :heart: I'm trying really hard to be. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/comment-about-a-pregnant-work-colleagues-capability-im-so-angry#post-1712920 Fri, 20 Jun 2014 15:13:29 +0000 MsLipGloss 1712920@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Cherrybee: makes perfect sense and sounds like a very reasonable accommodation. Assuming you expect her to return to normal duties pp, have you considered what you will do if she decides to BF? </p> <p>Good for you for holding your ground. Hopefully you will be able to foster some cohesiveness in your team. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/comment-about-a-pregnant-work-colleagues-capability-im-so-angry#post-1712919 Fri, 20 Jun 2014 15:13:27 +0000 Mrs. Pen 1712919@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Cherrybee: wow!!! divorce her for bringing shame to the family?! Sounds like a winner. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/comment-about-a-pregnant-work-colleagues-capability-im-so-angry#post-1712907 Fri, 20 Jun 2014 15:08:27 +0000 brownie 1712907@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>It is so hard because women work so hard to be exactly the same. Somehow we keep equating fair with exactly the same thing. Being fair is NOT treating everything the same. It is fair to let her off the hook on certain things just like it is fair for those people taking on her responsibilities to get to take vacation during a high time and her to cover for them (not a great example). </p> <p>Sounds like you are a great boss </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/comment-about-a-pregnant-work-colleagues-capability-im-so-angry#post-1712895 Fri, 20 Jun 2014 14:59:33 +0000 raspberries 1712895@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Ugh, I don't have any advice or anything, but that sucks, and I'd be just as angry. Stick to your guns, lady! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/comment-about-a-pregnant-work-colleagues-capability-im-so-angry#post-1712885 Fri, 20 Jun 2014 14:56:34 +0000 Cherrybee 1712885@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@MsLipGloss: No, I would expect her to spend two full days per week out and about. But it's just not safe. This direction is directly related to her (3rd tri) pregnancy. Instead, she will be attending more Court Hearings for the team and doing more phone based and office based work. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/comment-about-a-pregnant-work-colleagues-capability-im-so-angry#post-1712881 Fri, 20 Jun 2014 14:53:41 +0000 Cherrybee 1712881@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@gingerbebe: It's funny you should say that...... because he believes that a woman's place is in the home and has said previously that if his wife insisted on working he would divorce her for bringing shame on the family. I've been trying not to equate today's comments with those previous comments...... but I can't help thinking that he feels that she shouldn't be working "if she's not capable of doing the job" etc etc. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/comment-about-a-pregnant-work-colleagues-capability-im-so-angry#post-1712874 Fri, 20 Jun 2014 14:51:17 +0000 MsLipGloss 1712874@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Would you have made the same decision (regarding the visits) were she not pregnant? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/comment-about-a-pregnant-work-colleagues-capability-im-so-angry#post-1712855 Fri, 20 Jun 2014 14:45:44 +0000 gingerbebe 1712855@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Yeah that would piss me off too. Especially because I don't think he would have said anything if you were a male manager. He probably thinks that as a woman you're playing favorites or whatever. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/comment-about-a-pregnant-work-colleagues-capability-im-so-angry#post-1712803 Fri, 20 Jun 2014 14:30:09 +0000 Cherrybee 1712803@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Okay, so I started managing a service - and the team who deliver this service - two weeks ago and WOW it's in a mess; everything that could be wrong is wrong. The work isn't getting done, the team are disengaged and argue constantly, keeping dossiers of each others' perceived incompetence.... and so many more issues.....you name it, it's bad. </p> <p>At the start of the week, I issued some instructions about managing the workload going forward. I'm going to need to micro manage this team for the first few weeks to get them working smartly. One of my instructions was around cover for my pregnant staff member, specifically her home visit work. My team are essentially debt collectors working on deprived and sometimes dangerous estates. It simply isn't safe to put a pregnant lady in this position - or to ask her to traipse about housing estates for several hours per day with no access to a toilet!!</p> <p>So this afternoon, one of my male officers came to speak to me. He was most unhappy that the pregnant colleague wasn't going to be made to do home visits (it's not even that he has to cover because he does a different role and is office based!). He said "She's able to go for a walk around the block every lunch time so I don't see why she shouldn't do home visits". </p> <p>I told him in no uncertain terms that I didn't feel it was appropriate - and said directly that I don't have to justify to him the decisions I make. </p> <p>Eight hours on and I'm still angry. I'm so, so angry. He has two young sons (his wife is a SAHM) so he knows all about pregnancy, surely? I feel sorry for his poor wife. </p>